"cut!" mr. choi barked. as the director, he walked over to the two actors. without lowering the megaphone, he said, "closer please." both mark and donghyuck flinched at the volume of his voice before staring at each other wearily. seeing how they awkwardly scooted closer, the director sighed, finally putting down the megaphone and handing it to another staff member.

   "mark, can you put a hand on donghyuck's waist please?"

   the canadian glanced at donghyuck and then placed a hand on his waist. "now pull him closer when you finish your first line, alright?" mr choi stressed. "alright," mark nodded. "and donghyuck," he turned to the sun kissed male. "when you start your first line, trace you finger along mark's collar, then slip your hands into his hair. you can do that, right?" "of course," donghyuck also nodded.

   "it's settled then, we'll take it from the top," he mumbled, walking away. mark dropped his hands from donghyuck's waist immediately, and they stepped away from each other as if they were strangers who had just met for the first time that day. "ah, also," he stopped in his tracks, turning back around, "'first love' is all about tension and lust, okay? so show me eye contact, shameless flirting, lingering touches, i want it all."

   this time mark and donghyuck didn't even get a chance to respond before mr. choi walked away again. it was just a camera test, why where they taking it so seriously? donghyuck wondered. he secretly looked at mark to see him looking anywhere but at him. he wanted to take the time and take advantage of mark in a somewhat vulnerable state, but honestly donghyuck couldn't blame him.

   "places people!" mr choi said into his damn megaphone. mark had the urge to snatch it out of his hand and throw is at the wall, but instead, he stood in position next to donghyuck, smoothly placing a hand on his waist.

   "scene twenty-seven, take five... action!"

   "you get off soon, right? i don't know how much more patience i have," mark said huskily. just as promised, he pulled donghyuck closer to him so that their chests met. mark could feel how quickly donghyuck's heartbeat was and he suspected that his own wasn't so different.

   "i get off in an hour, but i'll sneak out through the back for you," donghyuck traced the structure of mark's neck before tangling his fingers in his dark locks from the back of his head. "would you like that?"

   on cue, he slowly lifted his head, meeting mark's gaze. he was tempted to look away, but it was his job, he didn't want to mess it up. especially not in front of mark.

   the ravenette said his next line but donghyuck completely missed it until he heard mark calling his name, "donghyuck?" this snapped him back to reality and he realized he was supposed to have said his line seconds ago.

   "cut!"

   so much for not making a mistake, he thought dejectedly.

   "sorry," donghyuck pulled away from mark and lowered his head, "i don't know what distracted me." the director frowned but waved him off, "take five everyone."

   the brunette sighed, dropping his head in his hands. he had been doing great all day until it was time to film with mark. what was wrong with him?

   he stepped off set and drank some water, trying to clear his mind, with all the voices in the distant background, it was harder to do than he thought. he wished doyoung was there to give him a pep talk, but for some reason, he still hadn't returned from driving donghyuck's parents back. 

   a water bottle was picked up from the table next to him, and donghyuck shifted to the side as if to not get in the way. "hey," the intruder spoke up instead. carefully, donghyuck lifted his head to see mark staring at him, bottle in his hand. 

   "what do you want, mark?" donghyuck sighed. mark seemed to hesitate before he opened his mouth again, "just... you look stressed, but i thought you were doing pretty good. we're both tired considering," he paused to look at his watch, "we've been here for over seven hours, so let's finish up and go home, yeah?" donghyuck only had time to blink at him before mark walked away.

   what was that?

   mark's recent kind actions were off-putting and suspicious. he only started acting like that toward donghyuck since the whole incident with miyeon in the restaurant happened, and he still couldn't piece together what brought the abrupt change. it wasn't like him, and it kept bringing donghyuck back to a place of nostalgia that he typically made an effort not to revisit. 

   he shook his head in frustration, pulling out the script that was now balled up and covered in wrinkles out of his pocket. his finger ran over the lines over and over again, attempting to memorize the lines which he usually didn't struggle doing. "can we all get back into position now?" the director called, causing donghyuck to realize that the five minute break was indeed over. he snuck a glance at mark who was busy conversing with johnny in complete relaxation and gulped down some water. this was easily the most stressful camera test he'd ever done, but it wasn't gonna end quick enough if he didn't get himself together.

   he strode over to his position just as mark slid next to him. "ready to wrap this up?" the older asked, raising his brows as his bangs fell over his eyes. donghyuck cowered against mark's gaze, his demeanor shrinking naturally. "yeah, let's finish this," he exhaled.

   "alright!" the director exclaimed. "let's do it just as I said earlier, and take it from the top. scene twenty seven, take six... action!" 

   mark hooked an arm around donghyuck's waist, unknowingly sending goosebumps all across the latter's skin. "you get off soon, right? i don't know how much more patience i have," the ravenette rumbled. he pulled donghyuck to his chest and a warmness spread between them. the sun-kissed male tilted his face so that his lips shadowed mark's as he spoke in soft breaths, avoiding eye contact, "i get off in an hour, but i'll sneak out through the back for you." he lifted his gaze slowly, trailing mark's neck line, up to his soft, slightly parted lips, along the slope of his nose, and finally up to his dilated pupils. the air stilled.

   "would you like that?" he hummed smoothly, his finger dancing along mark's collar bones and disappearing into his dark hair. mark shuddered and tightened his grip on donghyuck's waist. "you know i would," the older agreed dutifully. "but don't get it twisted, alright? you understand how things are with me, don't you?" mark learned in closer so that their noses brushed against each other. as if he was venomous, donghyuck pulled back. "so some things really never do change, huh. you're still with your no-strings-attached agenda?" 

   mark chuckled softly, carefully pulling donghyuck back into his touch. "settle down now. i'm sure it won't get in the way of our fun."

   "...and cut! end scene!" mr. choi yelled, causing mark and donghyuck to pull away from each other and awkwardly adjusts their clothes just so that they could be occupied with something---anything. "that was great you guys! I think we're all satisfied with this take. as expected, your chemistry really is unmatched," the director praised. "go ahead and go home, get some rest, we'll contact you when we've come to a final decision." donghyuck felt himself relax, knowing that he likely wouldn't have to redo the scene then. however, another concern came to him as he wondered if this meant that the drama would actually become a queer project staring him and mark as love interests. 

   mark smiled and spoke for the both of them when he said, "thank you for this opportunity and all your hard work today. we look forward to hearing from you soon."

---

   sounds of heavy breathing filled the atmosphere as the air around them only got warmer. "oh god mark," a soft voice moaned, digging their nails into mark's back. he worked his tongue expertly, repeating what he knew felt good. then he lifted his head for a quick kiss, letting out a deep sigh of his own.

   he retreated back lower to keep working on pleasuring the other. "babe," they muttered suddenly through ragged breaths, "you never told me how it went."

   "told you how what went?" mark sucked harder, hoping to distract them. a weak laugh filled his ears, "you know what i'm talking about, don't be silly. your camera test, from earlier today." the ravenette paused to speak, "it went okay, don't worry about it."

   "oh i'm curious. give me a little more to work with, c'mon."

   "there's nothing more to say," mark huffed. "it's just work."

   "is it so hard for you to give me a brief rundown of what you were up to for the past few hours? mark, I swear sometimes its like you don't trust me enough to let me in." all the sexy playfulness that was once there vanished.

   mark sat up, trying not to lace his tone with irritation. "it's got nothing to do with trust, what are you talking about? it's not personal, alright? I just had a long day of work and I don't feel like getting into the details right now." evelyn sat up too, silently staring at mark before getting off the bed and picking her dress up from off of the floor. she turned her back to him and slipped it over her head, cheeks tinting with a pinkness that showed vulnerability. 

   "it's like you can't even tell."

   mark rolled his eyes, standing up as well and pulling on his joggers. "you don't get to run out whenever it's convenient for you. what are you talking about? what can't I tell?" evelyn turned to face mark, pulling her hair to one shoulder as she fixed her hair. "don't be smart with me."

   another ragged sigh came out of the man as he ran a hand behind his neck in exasperation. "then stop being so cryptic, I really don't know what you're talking about."

   "don't act like you can't tell that I love you, mark!"

   he was taken aback at the sight of tears rolling down evelyn's cheeks. "you.. you love me?" he gaped. of course he'd seen it through her actions but this was the first time that either of them had ever dared to vocalize this. he bit his lip as he realized that she may want to hear it from him as reassurance but he wouldn't be able to say it truthfully.

   "of course I love you!" she raised her voice. "it's been so many years of this.. this relationship between the two of us. we live together half the time, we split chores, I want you to meet my parents soon, don't you think it's obvious how I feel about you now?"

   mark couldn't think of anything to say before she started again.

   "if this was a one time thing and I knew you were just tired from work, fine! I wouldn't care! but this keeps happening again and again and now I know you're just avoiding this. you're avoiding opening up to me and committing to me. the way you purposefully busied your schedule every time i would ask if you were ready to be introduced to my parents, or the way that you rarely ever share a bed with me. don't think i don't notice your bullshit, mark. it's like I'm in this relationship alone!" she yelled, chest heaving up and down at her outburst. the lack of response from the other only made it worse. "do you even care?" 

   he opened his mouth hesitantly, "I do care, Evelyn, and i'm sorry that I make you feel that way." she continued to look at him expectantly. having never been in this position before, it was hard to think of what to say. 

   the tension between them was choking him and setting his lungs on fire and he breathed in another breath of air. "I don't have a lot of long-term commitments, you know that about me already. as for my feelings for you..." he paused again, almost awkwardly. evelyn looked at him blankly and he could see that she was looking for him to return those three words--but he just couldn't. "...they're..."

---

    "'deep in their own way'?! what does that even mean?"

   mark cringed as he heard his own words parroted back to him, bracing himself as the car swerved to the right. "focus on driving dude, my life is in your hands!" he replied in defense. 

   johnny put a hand to his forehead, getting the car back under control. "you've got to be kidding me, mark. you really are stupid," he muttered sourly. the younger crossed his arms over his chest and sank just a bit lower into his seat. "I wasn't expecting her to say all of that, okay?" when he got no response he added, "and I wasn't about to lie to her face."

   it had been almost a day since his fight with evelyn which ended in her crying more and declaring that they needed a break. she also told mark that he needed to have more clarity on how he felt about her and be able to express it to her before she would be ready to see him again.

   the conversation had been weighing down on him, because he didn't know how to give her what she wanted when he didn't think he'd ever be capable of feeling the same was she felt about him. then, he made the mistake of sharing this conflict with johnny who would undoubtedly nag him for letting things get so bad.

   "well look at yourself, you've just lost the one," johnny remarked. "are you happy now?" mark never though about Evelyn being "the one" before. he'd never looked at their relationship that seriously. "how can she be the one if I don't even love her?" he responded quietly. johnny cautiously glanced at him through the reflecting mirror. "that's the part I don't understand. how couldn't you love her? she's shown how dedicated to you she is and takes good care of you. plus, she's beautiful and never pressures you to give her more attention than your job. what's not to love?"

   they rolled up to a stop light and mark took the time to look out the window. a mother and her child crossed the street in front of them and he took them in for a minute before focusing on a group of teenage boys who laughed together at a bus stop. a wide image of his close past co-star and friend, jaehyun, was behind them which made mark smile softly. 

   the sound of johnny's rhythmic tapping against the steering wheel matched the tempo of the song on the stereo. sunday morning by maroon 5 wafted softly into mark's ears, and he chose to ignore the fact that it was a thursday evening, focusing on the melody rather than the lyrics. 

   "can we talk about something else?" mark answered, finally. johnny was dissatisfied and continued pushing for an answer, but fortunately, he pulled up to their destination before he could force an answer out. mark was grateful for that, because to tell the truth, he didn't understand why he couldn't love evelyn either.

   the engine turned off and the two sat in the car in silence. mark wasn't eager to get out of the car, and he felt grateful for johnny once more as the taller didn't push it. the past twenty four hours had been intense. he'd never been yelled at by a heartbroken girl who wasn't a fan before, and knowing where he was headed next didn't necessarily give him a good night's rest. 

   "johnny," mark called. "hmm?" he replied, looking up from his phone. mark unbuckled his seat-belt and leaned back, "I didn't screw up, did I?" the older sighed and turn off his phone, resting his arms behind his head.

   "only if you do love her," was the answer. 

   mark relaxed, though the thought of evelyn still weighed heavy on his heart, maybe this really was the best for them. "alright then, thanks hyung." johnny grunted in reply before saying, "now get out of the car before they think you're not gonna show."

   the ravenette swung open the car door and headed to the trunk of the car where he pulled out a large work bag. then he waved to johnny and headed to the elevator of the garage. his steps echoed after him loudly, making him feel more alone than ever. the cool touch of the elevator button brought height to his senses, and by the time he reached the right floor, he was staring to feel like himself again. he only had to take a few steps before he was at the penthouse door, and he pressed the doorbell carefully after a couple seconds of mental preparation. 

   "and here i was thinking i got lucky," donghyuck's grumpy voice met mark before the door even opened. 

   "hi," mark stood stiffly, taking in the sight of the younger before him. donghyuck was wearing a dark t-shirt and a pair of wide-leg baggy sweatpants. he made Mark look way over dressed which was immediately pointed out. "why are you dressed up like it's a business meeting? it's just me and my family. no one to impress here," he said casually, opening the door wider and signaling for Mark to follow him inside. 

   memories of the last time they were together rushed through his mind. with the close proximity that they shared and the sultry lines thrown back and forth between them, mark didn't understand how the younger was being so normal and calm. 

   mark shuffled inside, feeling unsure what to do with himself. "I just came from work," he lied, inwardly agreeing with donghyuck and wondering why he dressed up. his dark blue sweater and khaki pants seemed even more out of place as he wondered inside and heard all kinds of noises coming from the kitchen. 

   "oh hello, mark!" donghyuck's mother beamed as soon as she laid eyes on the canadian. she hurriedly dried her hands on a kitchen towel and rushed over to greet mark. checking the clock she said, "I didn't know when you'd be arriving so I just started on dinner. make yourself at home while I get to cooking."

   "it's literally my house," mark heard donghyuck mutter quietly behind him, but he didn't have time to dwell on it before Mrs. lee was ordering that donghyuck show mark to his room. "okay, okay, you're so pushy," donghyuck stuck his tongue out until he caught Mark staring and his face flushed. "c'mon," he waved, instead, doing as his mom instructed. "thank you for having me Mrs. Lee," mark hurriedly said before going after donghyuck who clearly didn't plan on waiting for him.

   the ravenette followed obediently, going further into donghyuck's house than he ever had. they walked through the living room into the hall with various doors lining either wall. one room's door was ajar and mark couldn't help but peer inside. there was a record collection and vinyl player as well as a keyboard and some posters lining the wall. 

   "don't be nosy," donghyuck snapped, but his voice showed embarrassment that mark didn't understand. "sorry," he muttered out of courtesy. his apology was ignored.

   donghyuck stopped walking abruptly and opened the door across from the one he just closed. "alright," he turned to mark. "you can stay in this room." the room was simple and themed with the color navy. there was a desk, a dresser, a random painting, and a TV on the wall-- clearly a classic guest room. "you get your own bathroom," donghyuck pointed at a door that appeared to be next to a closet, "so don't worry about running into me or my parents in the morning. as for that..." he pointed toward the unmade bed which was really nothing but a naked bed frame. 

   "the mattress I ordered came in right before you. good timing, right?" he didn't wait for an answer. "honestly I didn't really wanna buy it, but my mom kept insisting, and maybe she had a point, you do actually look pretty tense and a good mattress might fix you up." mark immediately dropped his shoulders upon hearing that and cleared his throat. 

   donghyuck only looked at him strangely before continuing. "but yeah, anyway, i'm gonna put on your mattress and all the other fun stuff so don't worry about it. do you wanna put your bag down?"

   mark nodded and walked inside, setting his bag down onto the dresser. "thanks hyuck," the old nickname rolled off his tongue so casually that he didn't even noticed he'd said it. "do you know how much time I have before your mom finishes cooking?"

   "I don't know," donghyuck rolled on the ball of his feet, "maybe forty-ish minutes." the older hummed and stretched his neck, "i'm gonna go ahead and shower now then, if that's okay." "sure," donghyuck shrugged, "i'll make ur bed while you're in there. I think I already hung up a towel." "great, thank you," mark unzipped his bag, pulling things out. 

   for a moment they just stared at each other awkwardly before donghyuck realized that that was probably his cue to leave and by standing there he was making things more weird. "oh right, sorry," he mumbled sheepishly before turning on his heel and leaving the room. 

   donghyuck learned against the wall outside of mark's room after closing the door, patiently waiting for the sound of running water from the shower. it felt so odd that mark was in his house, living in it. even if it would just be for the next two days. when he thought about the circumstances in which the occasion was raised, the whole thing only became funnier and he laughed to himself quietly in the empty hallway. their enemy ordeal was somewhat childish, that was for sure. but it also came from a place of familiarity and comfort that donghyuck couldn't deny. 

   he was so lost in though that he didn't notice the sound of running water, but what he did notice was the sound of mark singing to himself in the shower.

   sunday morning rain is falling

   the lack of background music made mark's vocals pierce through the silence, so donghyuck decided to get to work to keep himself busy. he carried in the large mattress that he'd just purchased with some difficulty, but finally managed to get it to fit the bed frame's large shape.

   that someday it would lead me back to you

   donghyuck proceeded to carry in the bed sheet and other necessities to arrange the bed. he'd just wrestled the mattress to cover it with a bed sheet when he noticed a journal on the desk. "I deserve a break anyway," he told himself, wandering over to it. 

   and back and forth we sway like branches in a storm

    "no way mark lee still keeps a journal," he muttered to himself, picking up the book and running his fingers over the cover. opening it would be intrusive, but he couldn't help but wonder. maybe mark really hadn't changed much at all.

   come and rest your bones with me

   he flipped open the cover with tentative fingers. his movements were slow, but with purpose. the first page consisted of songs. just lists upon lists of songs. donghyuck spotted a few that he frequently listened to and continued flipping through the pages just to see even more titles. who has a notebook full of song names? he thought. that's what playlists are for. 

   there was suddenly a difference in pattern when he noticed a page entirely covered in guitar chords and strumming patterns. "so he's still into guitar huh," donghyuck said to himself. 

   "yeah, i am," mark spoke from behind him. 

   donghyuck snapped the book shut. "shit sorry, I didn't mean to.." he trailed off when he turned around to see Mark standing before him in nothing but a towel, using a smaller one to dry off his hair. he caught the faintest mark of a hickey which was visible beneath mark's collar bone before he covered his eyes with the palms of his hands.

   "give a guy a warning! geez!"

   "you're the one prying into my personal belongings!" mark argued, sounding a little flustered himself. 

   "well why would you put that there when you knew I was gonna come in?"

   "never.. nevermind that," mark sighed. donghyuck turned around and kept his back to the ravenette. he heard shuffling and figured that he was getting dressed.

   "you didn't see anything, did you?" mark asked. anxiety was clear in his voice. donghyuck was quick to shut that down, "nothing but some questionable music taste."

   donghyuck continued to get scolded by a somewhat more relieved sounding mark, but he hardly paid attention to him. he was too busy thinking about that hickey that he saw and who could've given it to him.

-----

word count: 4210

first update in nearly two years i am so sorry

unedited (all lowercase is probably not gonna be my style anymore)

if you're still here, thank you so much! all your support while i've been inactive has meant a lot to me. the next update is still indefinite...

✎ ---- dreaminghyuck⤾