What's up, folks?! I hope you guys are doing well because this Corona is making many people panic! Please remember to STAY INSIDE! It helps tremendously! #readtogether

Anyway...

What do you think about Tiff finally letting her guard down for Bryce?

Do you think that Rena will eventually find Tiff in the church?

Well, we are back with a new chapter for Screw Me Over! It's date night for Rena! 😁

Anyway, please see the triggers that are in the summary of this story!

Alright, y'all! That's all I have! You may continue! 💜🤫
****

After finding Raina running around the church and taking her to her children's class, I ran into a few church members and spoke with them. Boy, do they know how to talk or what. Every time they see me, they want to know what I've been up to and ask me many questions. I should see this as a good thing but, ever since I moved in with the girls, I don't want everyone in my business like that.

Although they may be asking because they care, people around the church like to gossip. If I told them anything about Keenan and whatnot, they'd probably pass it over to the pastor.

And we know how that will end up.

Anyway, I tried looking for Tiffany once I came into the sanctuary. She was nowhere to be found in the congregation. All I could think of was if she ran out of the church and just walked home. Something about the church just turns her off. It makes her scared.

To be honest, I didn't blame her. The church isn't a safe place like it used to be anymore. So many false prophets, gossipers, gun shootings, and many other things in the church.

Oh, and overeaters. Max always gives me three pieces of Jesus and two cups of his blood. One of each just couldn't suffice. You know what I mean? The little crackers and grape juice every First Sunday?

So after our church service, I went to pick up Raina from her class and here comes Tiffany running from the sanctuary panting and smiling at me. She let me know she was looking all over the church for me, but do you think I believed her?

When the Mr. Flirty Sound Man was thanked during the announcements, I already knew where she was. She couldn't fool me, but I couldn't stop her from spending time with that guy. She had to give him a chance. He was showing interest and that was the only guy that would show her any interest to be honest. She scared everyone else away.

Just as long as she didn't get busy in the sound booth of the Lord's house, we were fine. And if she did, of course she would deny deny deny. You know how she is by now.

So it was the Friday evening before my birthday and all of the girls were home. It made my heart happy because we were all over the place and not together. It made me a bit worried not knowing where everyone was. Especially Carmon because I had her child for most of the time.

Unfortunately, Jess and Jana were still on bad terms. Carmon was sick and Tiffany was too busy on the phone with the sound man. She only came out when she wanted to get something to eat.

Standing at the kitchen island, I watched as Jessica slammed stuff down on the counter. Carmon was wrapped in a blanket on the couch and sleeping, Tiffany had just walked in the phone to her ear, smiling from ear to ear. Jana was walking into the kitchen and Raina went to bed early.

Once she saw Jess slamming things against the counter, Jana's eyes widened in fear and she continued to walk through the small kitchen area. So you're not going to say anything to her?

"Are you upset or what? Damn, I'm on the phone," Tiffany finally said breaking the silence.

My eyes widened at Tiff's response and I tried to signal her to not say anything. It was bad enough that Jess just came back home and she still wasn't right in the head. She wasn't happy, as Tiff saw, and her question just made everything worse.

"Lemme see. I'm absolutely happy about being a serial killer according to my so-called lover. I also care about your stupid ass conversation with String Head on the other end of the phone call," Jess responded with the sarcastic tone. Stage one of the rages of Jess. It all depends on what you say to her. She can skip straight to stage four...which is beat the shit out of you if you try to fight with her or say something way out of like.

"Well, I'm cool with my new found freedom. It's nice to be able to see other people again," Jana spoke in response to Jessica's indirect message. Why the hell did she say something? Here we go.

"BITCH! Don't pull that shit! You're the one that ended our engagement over something you knew nothing about! It's MY MAMA! She was already dying, you dumb fuck!" She slammed a knife on the counter and started hollering, making Carmon toss and turn on the couch. Oh hell.

"Don't fucking yell at me. I called everything off due to your little motive behind pulling the plug on her. You're right. That's your mother. It wasn't because she was about to die. You did it because you were still angry with her. Not to mention, you've put me through hell and back. Why the hell would I stick around for that?"

"BECAUSE YOU FUCKING PUT ME THROUGH HELL, BITCH! Let me remind you who  the person who cheated was because it certainly wasn't my ass. I've never cheated on you! I've never messed around on you! I've done everything for your stupid ass only for YOU to come home like ain't shit happen. Miss me with that shit, bitch!" Jess hollered louder as she threw a knife towards Jana but missed and it fell against the wall. It was official. Jess was at stage four already.

"So, we're bringing our past shit up again? Who was the one that just threw a knife at me?! Who was the one that put a fucking chip in my foot?! Which cost me hundreds of dollars to get out, by the way! Who was the one that paid someone to follow me around Atlanta when I was gone to DJ at a club?! You don't trust me like you say you do! Although I understand why, that gives you no excuse to be toxic towards me. That doesn't make your toxic nature okay because who wants-"

A slam of a glass plate blared throughout the house as it was thrown towards Jana. Jessica continued to throw spices around and foods before shouting "YOU DRIVE ME INSANE! I'm so fucking over this! What the hell do you want from me?! I've done everything for your stupid ass and you STILL cheated on my ass! I could have been done killed you or beat the fuck out of your dumbass, I never even attempted. Why? Because I love the fuck out of you! I can't picture anyone else in your place in my life because you're all I pretty much knew when it came to love. This is the thanks I get for it! It's not fair what you do to me, Jana!"

Jessica fell to the ground and just sobbed into her messy hands. She broke down on the kitchen floor and I had to come to her just to make her feel better. That's what Cousin Rena has to do every time Jess gets her heart broken. My poor cousin.

"So you're not going to do anything about this, Jana? I thought you were better than that! Here you go jumping to conclusions and telling Jess not to do the same for you! You gave her a reason to!" I shouted as I held her in my arms. Jana looked down at me and Jess with a lost look on her face. Like she didn't know what to do.

"DON'T DO THIS TO ME, JANA! I'm sorry! Just please don't leave me!" Jess yelled as she lifted her drenched face from my chest and snatched herself away from me. Jana finally kneeled down towards Jess and held her against her chest.

As soon as I stood up and smiled at the pair, Tiffany put her phone down and said "Come on, ladies. Get back together for Rena's birthday at least. Jess never breaks down like this. She loves you, Jana."

She wasn't wrong. Jessica never admitted she was wrong like this. She never apologized unless it was to the people she loved. Jana wrapped her arms around Jess tightly as Jess shouted how sorry she was over and over again while begging for Jana not to leave her.

Tiffany and I looked at each other as Jana picked Jess up and threw her over her shoulder just to go back to their room. My heart fell for my cousin because she shows so much love to others. People may not see it that way but Jess is a hard lover. She will tell you that you smell like shit while at a school dance but she'll give you some deodorant and perfume to help you smell better.

Suddenly, Carmon sat up from the couch and walked into the kitchen looking for something to drink with her blanket wrapped around her. "What did I miss?"

****

Breathe, Rena. It's your 21st birthday and you're older now. You can explore new things and people. Just give him a chance. He wants to know you and no other guy is willing to get to know you. If it doesn't work out, at least you get a home-cooked meal made by Jess, right?

While talking to myself in the mirror, I played with my braided crocheted hair. They were long but small in width so there were many of them and covered my head. Wondering if I should keep it halfway up or just throw it up in a bun of twisted braids, I sighed to myself. I wanted to stay comfortable and the bun was my comfortable look.

Tiffany got me a black romper that fell loose on my body and had pockets. Once it got to the hips though, it got a bit snug. It was off-the-shoulder and matched these open-toed flat sandals.

Taking in the atmosphere, I breathed in my hand to do a breath check. Minty fresh. We were good.

After my pit check though, I winced in disgust and put on deodorant. It was official. I had been in the house for way too long.

A knock came to the door and made me jump a little. "Come in." I allowed for my overly excited cousin to walk into my room. She would have busted in anyway.

To my understanding, her and Jana made up and now they're back together again after a long night of sex. Sadly, I was on the bad end of that stick since I had to listen to it all night and couldn't sleep.

"Hey. How are you feeling?" she asked standing by me in a royal blue cutout shoulder blouse and her dark brown hair falling over them. Her blue flats complemented her white capris and she smelled like berries. She smiled at me through my closet mirror.

"Jess, I can't do this. I want to throw up," I confessed as my chest rose and fell. She interlocked her fingers with mine and it felt like I needed or a toilet or trash can nearby. There were so many doubtful thoughts flashing through my mind. I couldn't do this.

"Rena, you'll be just fine. You just have the jitters. You have a great heart, you're smart, you're beautiful, and you deserve all of this. He wants you and everything that comes with you. Who wouldn't want all of that?" she tried to encourage me as she held my hands tightly and smiled at me.

"Hey, not to interrupt anything you guys are doing, but Brian's here and he came looking sharp," Jana said poking her head through the door. That only made my stomach feel weaker. I wasn't ready for any of this. It had been years since I went on my last date. What was I supposed to do?

Jess let my hands go and walked over to Jana while Jana studied her outfit with a smile on her face. "Alright, Rena. It's showtime. The food's already fixed and sitting on the oven. Drinks are also on the counter. Have fun and I love you," Jessica said as she left with Jana.

Spritzing a little more champagne-scented fragrance on, I took a deep breath and slowly walked out of my room. My eyes fell over a caramel-skinned Brian with a sweet smirk on his face while talking to the girls. My eyebrows furrowed at the sight of him licking his bottom lip.

Tiffany pointed me out and he turned to look at me. My face of anger dropped to a nervous one as his 5'11" self stood up in his read and black plaid dress shirt and black boot-cut jeans. His black converse shined like new and I couldn't help but reveal a small smile. He really cared about his shoes.

"Rena...you look gorgeous," he said breathtakingly and it made my stomach turn again. No one has really told me that before. No guy anyway.

"Thanks." Was all I could say to his comment without feeling even more queasy. The girls had left while he stood in front of me with his lean stature. He took my hand and walked me out towards the patio where the fairy lights surrounded the frame of it. Our circular patio table was decorated with fake flower petals, some candles, and a long white table cloth with our plates set up as if we were at a restaurant. It was all beautiful.

He pulled my chair out for me to sit in before he sat down and turned on the romantic playlist that Jana had made up. I sat in my chair twiddling my thumbs and my stomach's insides were jumping around like they were in a bounce house.

Brian cleared his throat and said "Rena, would you like something to eat? Jess made some chicken and ribs for us."

Looking down at my thumbs and avoiding eye contact with him, I nodded at his words and thought about how Jess made all that food at my request. Fried chicken and ribs with green beans and mashed potatoes. She even made the gravy and a nice chocolate cake to be dessert.

He stepped into the apartment to get the food as I took this time to think to myself. My heart was beating out of my chest thinking of how great he looked. He seemed like he was trying to get me back in my element but it just wasn't working yet. He did look so good. Maybe this wasn't the right time to try with-

Oh God! Here he comes!

"Sorry it took me so long," he said as he sat the warm plate of food in front of me. My chest raised while he popped open a bottle of pink Moscato and the cork hit him in the face. For some reason, I found that extremely funny.

As I laughed hard at the cork hitting his face, he smiled at me and poured the drink in our glasses. My laugh eventually calmed down and I felt more comfortable around him once we started eating. As I cut into the chicken Jess made, he stuffed the ribs into his mouth like the corny man he is. It made me laugh all over again.

"Is it that good, Brian?" I chuckled to get more comfortable. This started up a conversation about what meats we liked and didn't care so much for. After that, our conversation became more intimate and we talked about what we wanted out of life. We talked about our dreams, goals, and more.

He never put on this fake manly façade with me. When he talked to me, he was just open with me. We talked about our passions in life and one thing I picked up on was that he loved animals or nature in general. He admitted he wanted to learn more about how to train animals and how to help the earth.

Then we talked about Tiarria and her competitive dancing. This was when a slow song came on. "Hey, Stevie Wonder is playing. Wanna dance?" he took me out of my thoughts as he pointed out the song that played. For Your Love was the song that played.

Usually, I'd say no but the wine had kicked in and it made me feel comfortable enough to dance on this small patio with him.

He took my hand and twirled me into his arms. A giggle left my lips as we swayed side to side and a strong whiff of his cologne came through my senses. That amber smell made me place my head on his chest because I wanted to smell more.

He wrapped his not-so-strong arms around my waist and spoke to me with his chin on my head. "Rena, have you ever just wanted to reach for the stars and grab one of them?"

I didn't answer because I had no clue what he was talking about and that bubbly feeling came back up again. "Maybe that sounded wrong. Let me try again. Have you ever tried to reach for something but stopped because you were afraid of the outcome?" he clarified.

Little did he know that I've done this all of my life. Work hard for something and get so close to the outcome, but got scared and ran away because I was afraid of rejection or any negative answer.

"Yeah, I've felt that way before. Plenty of times. Why do you ask?" I said looking up from his chest and into his eyes.

He watched me with hopeful eyes and started with "Well...I've been in the same situation for years now..."

He stopped and sighed then bit his bottom lip at me with doubt. I went to place my head back on his chest but he pulled my head back up to face him with his two finger tips. Oh shit. "But tonight, I don't want to be afraid of the outcome. Something in me believes the odds are in our favor."

The tension just came so fast that I couldn't even think properly. He placed my hand on his heart and let me feel his wildly beating heart. My head felt hot as his lips brushed over mine. If this outcome from this was some unconditional love for the rest of my life, maybe I would have taken this on. But I didn't know where this would lead.

Our past haunts me every time we speak. I wanted to work things out, but I was just scared. As much as I wanted to seal the deal, I just couldn't and he knew it from the look on his face. He let me go and backed away from me. Him backing away from me was the best decision but it didn't make me feel good.

He kissed me on the cheek and said "You're not ready and I understand. Until next time."

As he walked away, my lips opened slightly taking in the cold air as my hands placed themselves on the table in hurt. I tried to hold back the urge to cry but that didn't go as planned. Tears fell down my face as I thought about what we could have been. Where we wanted things to go.

This all got ruined because of my stupid ass insecurities and distrust for him.