Happy Freaky Friday, folks!

DUN DUN DUN DUHHHHHH!

The truth has been revealed! What do you think? How do you think this will all transpire?

How do you think Jana and the rest of the girls will react?

And how did she get that way?

Y'all, I'll be quite honest. I've been having troubles writing so hopefully this weekend will make up for that. I didn't post on Tuesday or Thursday because the week has been stressful so I'll update Friday through Sunday! 😁

Anyway, please see the triggers that are in the summary of this book!

Anyway, you may continue! 💜🤫
****

Okay, so maybe I shouldn't have said anything about my pregnancy to Jana so fast. Especially after a wild sex high. She barely uses that dildo and decides to pull it out-

Jess, you forgot that it's Submission Saturday. Anything goes. 

Anyway, Jana paused on her way to the bathroom to slowly turn to me with widened eyes. Like she had just seen a ghost and didn't know what the hell to do. To be honest, I didn't know what I was thinking when the topic was brought up. Really, I didn't know what I was thinking when I attempted to plan all of this.

Yeah, I technically planned this pregnancy and my plan was to talk to Jana about this. However, I was afraid to speak to her on the topic because she's not big on kids. She probably wouldn't have listened to me and, if she did, she would have made excuses on why we shouldn't have a child together.

We were just like any other couple. We deserved to have children. I probably fucked up here too, but I also thought that she would leave me or not be focused on our relationship again.

My trust in her had diminished. She tells me anything and expects me to just automatically believe her. What if she cheated on me again? That would be the one time I'd lose my mind.

So, I had a child, thinking it would keep her around. Why wouldn't she stick around for this one? Fourth time's the charm, right?

Here I was thinking that Jana would really not like the idea of having a kid. It was harder for us to have children since our relationship isn't so looked up to where we're from. We wouldn't be able to adopt and the sperm bank would have taken way too long. Speaking of the sperm bank, what if I got a disease or an STD or worse?

I didn't want to take the risk so, a while ago, Leo donated his sperm and I injected it with a syringe. Technically, I didn't cheat. Leo's sperm is so fertile. He got me pregnant three times before but we lost them so I figured he could get me pregnant again. Got my wish.

Anyway, Jana stood there and looked at me with so much shock in her eyes that the life in her just left her or she just froze up like a damn icicle. Of course, she wasn't excited about this at the moment.

"Please tell me this is just some after-bomb-sex talk and you're joking," Jana spat as she finally unfroze and got closer to me.

Is this bitch serious? Who would say they're pregnant after having some hot ass sex and be joking? Can you imagine that? Who gets turned on by someone once they say they're pregnant during sex? It's like someone doing it doggystyle moaning out 'Oh baby, I'm so pregnant' and the other partner gets off. Who does that?

This was no kind of sex talk. This was the real deal. The real shebang. I was knocked the fuck up.

"Jay, I'm serious. We're having a baby...SURPRISE!" I let out with a fake ass smile on my face.

I won't lie. I tried so hard to keep this from her because I knew she would react like this, but she's noticed my weight gain and such. My mood has changed lately and the only person that knew about my pregnancy was Rena because she noticed first. It was like she had an eye for these things. She had me take a pregnancy test and that's when I found out my plan worked...somewhat.

As soon as I found out I had a bun in the oven, my hours were cut at Walmart so the stress wouldn't overtake my baby. Now, I'm stuck at home more often and have too much time on my hands. Thoughts and questions filling my head again.

Is it normal to feel horny while you're pregnant? And did that dildo poke my baby in the head? Poor baby. I hope not.

"Jess, how the hell did that shit happen? It HAD to be when you went to the beach and-"

"Okay, cool off before you go ape shit on me. Listen, I didn't sleep with just anyone on the beach and got pregnant. Don't even try that shit. It was a while ago, back when we were in a great place in our relationship. I asked Leo to help us out on a baby and he gave up some sperm. Inserted a syringe up my vag and boom. Baby," I interrupted while pointing at my stomach as Jana facepalmed. Gotta love that facepalm. That means she's super devastated.

I knew it was coming because she hates Leo, but my payback wasn't over. She was in for so much more.

"Jess, what are you trying to do? Torture me? Give me a damn heart attack? What were you even thinking? We don't want to bring a child into this world with no money, no space, or anything else. Why now?" Jana whined as I just rolled my eyes.

I just knew that all of this was coming. All of the bickering and complaining again. I just knew she didn't want any kids and that she was going to make a big deal about it.

"That's the thing though, Jay. We really do. We have all of that. Mama was given a house from the Black family and she stayed in it for a while. It was passed down to me. If you keep doing gigs on the weekends and we have the weekdays to spend with the baby, there's the time part. Then I can work from home so there's the money aspect."

After explaining all of that to her, she still looked bothered and I wasn't planning on repeating myself. I was already getting frustrated.

"Jess, I still don't understand why you did this. I'm just going to assume that this is payback for all the shit I put you through..."

She paused at the thought of me just being pregnant. I understood that this was a lot to take in, but this was also a test for our relationship. Are we able to take things to the next level without having petty issues like we did before? Can we get through these trials together.

"How far along are you, Jess?" She asked with a blank look in her face.

It took me a while to think because, to be honest...before the last time we had sex...is when I planned all of this. I'd say about 12 weeks or so. I missed two whole periods before but the second one was the one that really freaked me out. The throwing up and pissing all the time started recently. I've been cooking but the food didn't stay in my stomach for long. Rena caught on to all of this and took me to the doctor while Jana was off to work. And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how I found out I was having a little Jess...or Leo.

That sounds so bad and I want to punch that man for planting so many seeds in me...except for this one. I can't help but thank him for this seed. And if I were able to keep the last three, I'd probably slap him and then say thanks.  This is why I wanted and felt we were ready to have a family.

After telling Jana how far along I was, according to the doctor and my best guesstimate, Jana's eyebrows furrowed and she spat with "Ooooooh! JESS, ARE YOU SERIOUS?! So you really did sleep with him while you were gone! I-"

I stood up and started off towards our room because I didn't care to hear her jump to conclusions again. There was too much to worry about and-

Interrupting the complaints and thoughts, she grabbed my arm before I reached the bedroom and pulled me into her arms. Rolling my eyes again, I sighed as she tried to get me to look at her.

Turning my face to look at her, she said "You know what? It really doesn't even matter. You're right. So, fuck it. We're having a baby."

A smile appeared in her face as those emerald eyes sparkled in the light. Her soft forehead touched mine as her nose landed on mine as well and my heart rested. She finally accepted the fact that we were having a baby.

"Please tell me you're not joking," I said as wrapped her arms around me tighter, showing her deepest affection.

"Babe, we've been through a ton of shit throughout the years. I'm not leaving or making myself mad because you have a whole human being in your stomach. I just want you to feel comfortable telling me how you really feel and, if I don't agree, we can work something out. Even though I don't agree with how you created...or who you created the baby with, I'll get over it. It's a lot to take in so you have to give me some time, okay?" She said with a soft fresh freckled smile on her face.

Her little cute smile makes my heart jump each time and lately, she's been smiling more often. This was a smile of reassurance and acceptance. It was a lovely smile.

"I think we should check that house out now that it's in your name. What do you think?" Jana mentioned as I placed my hands on her chest softly to keep my balance.

Feeling dizzy, my right hand sat on the top of my head as my stomach rumbled and growled. Either that was a baby lion up in my stomach or I was 'hungry'.

Trying to not think about my pain, the thought of Mama's house came about and, fortunately for us, it was right across the way from Rena's grandmother's house. Her mom and granny still lives there after 21 years with her brother and like 15 uncles. Just an exaggeration. There's only two, but they come in and out of the house like it's a damn motel. Ms. June never refused to help someone that was on the streets. A bad idea, in my opinion and experience, but I couldn't tell her that.

"Lets go see the house," I agreed as we got prepared to leave the apartment. As soon as my feet took a step forward, there went this morning's breakfast.

****

Walking into this tired and stuffy house made my sinuses flare up with its dust and very bad cigarette smell. The house looked so broken from the inside. It was pretty symbolic of my mom. Looking alright on the outside while broken and half-assed on the inside. Little did she know that her insides were about to be shown from the outside.

The ends of cigarettes, old dirty diapers, shredded papers, boxes, broken glass, and so many other things laid on the floor. Ash covered the floors, the walls, the stairs and everything else.

We walked from the door to the short lobby with the kitchen straight ahead, living room to the left, and the stairwell to the right. Just like I briefly remember except, back then, it was much cleaner.

"Looks like we have a ton of work to do in a short amount of time. This is gonna take a lot of money and lots of time," Jana spoke as she kicked around the old material in the house.

Yeah, too much work that wouldn't have been needed had my mother really taken care of the house and me like she was supposed to.

"We're going to need more hands. We can't get all of this mess up with just the two of us," I responded as my eyes roamed around the shabby place that I once called home. The poor polished wooden stairwell was falling apart as holes in the burgundy walls reminded me of Mama's plethora of abusive partners. Makes me want to punch another hole in the wall because of that alone.

As Jana went on and on about how she didn't like the colors of the walls, my eyes landed on something familiar that happened to be outside. The noticeable mailman was delivering a package to my granny's house. Ms. June surely knew how to talk someone's ear off.

I opened the door and walked out of the house just to remember the face of an old angel right then and there. My heart grew with an abundance of joy as I acknowledged him with "Uncle Ricky? ¿Cómo estas?"

He smiled as I exclaimed and ran over to hug my savior of an uncle with the brightest smile on my face. When I was about six years old, this glorious man got Mama in check for leaving me at home by myself for a week. He took care of me for a few months while Mama was gone. She persuaded him that she was 'better' and took me back since I was technically still in her custody. He always wanted to take care of me and treated me like one of his own. He didn't have children so I was the next best thing, I guess.

"Sobrina! ¿Qué algo? Wait, let's stop with the Spanish. Someone may think we're immigrants," he shook his head in defeat as a small smile came over his face. He looked much younger than when I first saw him. I'd say that it's in our genes.

"Like they don't already think we are. You know how Aunt Rosa died-"

"¡Y sanseacabó, Jessica! We cannot continue that conversation. I know how passionate you are about the subject. Now, tell me how my favorite niece is doing," he laughed.

He was definitely right about me being passionate about my people. ICE is willing to take anybody that's not from this country, chew them up, and spit them out. Holding immigrants hostage and treat them as if they were wild animals. It's bullshit. Like immigrants didn't make this country what it is today. But we won't explain all of that to Tiff right now.

Anyway, once we finally settled that, I talked to my uncle about my relationship with Jana, my pregnancy, how I was moving into the house and everything else. Seeing my uncle made my day because he was never one to judge. He loved me for who I was no matter what I did and that was the greatest gift I could ever get from him.