"So..." I say to Kai, who moves his French fries around. "...you uh...you like food, I see." Makai and I have been eating food for 30 minutes since we got together at the mall. Well, he's been eating. I've been watching. Trying to find a conversation between Makai and I am like stumbling upon a talking unicorn. 

"Mhmm," he sighs, dipping a fry in ketchup before taking a bite. His movements are slow and his eyes are heavy. "And you also...um, breathe."

"Yup." 

"Wow, that's something we have in common," he says with sorrow. Actually, everything he says is with sorrow. He just seems so depressed. It's like he's a four-year-old who lost his favourite toy. But in this case, he's a teenager who has had everything stripped away from him through death. Tragedy doesn't quite touch what the town of Solaris has gone through.

"So what do you want to do after we eat?"

Makai rolls his brown eyes. "Die," he grunts.

Anger flares up inside of me. People have begged for their lives when they were at the mercy of a killer, and now Makai just wants to die? He thinks he's lost. He thinks he has nothing to live for anymore. He has no idea about all the people who need him and cares for him.

"So funny," I agitatedly state.

Makai shrugs. "Eh, I've had better death jokes."

"Well, death doesn't joke. Not anymore."

Kai rolls his eyes. "Whatever. Go ahead and add that proverb in your philosophy diary or something."

 Stormy, I stand and swipe his tray of fries. I toss them in the trash can. "Hey! I bought those with money, you know." 

"Wow, you mean you didn't buy them with origami snowflakes?" I bite.

"Pay me back," Makai demands, trailing behind me as I stomp out of the mall.

"Why bother? The dead don't have to pay for anything besides their life, right?"

"Kellin, come on. It's not like you were close with anyone who died. You don't know what it's like," Makai accuses.

Swivelling towards him, I notice he digs in his pocket for his car keys. When he pulls them out, I take them from him and shove them in my pocket. "That doesn't give you an excuse! You want to die?" 

"Why not?" Makai questions the universe. "Why fucking not?"

"You think you're all alone?"

"Hell yeah," Makai confirms.

"You think you've lost everyone?"

"I know I have," he barrels on.

"You think you have nothing to live for?"

"Nothing!"

I hop on my motorcycle, borrowing my dad's. "Let's see how true you think that is," I challenge.

"Wait what?"

"Get on, Makai," I order. "You want to die? Do you want to bring death after you? I'll show your death."

Grimacing, Makai gets on behind me. "Bring it on."

I raise my kickstand and put on my helmet. Revving the motor, I wait for traffic. Down the street, the stoplight flicks green and a stream of cars race this way. "You wanna die?" I ask, pulling down the shield of my helmet. "Let's die." 

 Cars rush past us with whooshing noises. I give the motor such a start that when we finally accelerate forwards, we run on one wheel. Makai holds onto me as cars honk at us for getting too close to their vehicles and bumping them every now and then. Finally, I settle on speeding down the line between cars. Makai is on the line of wanting death, so we'll run that line here. 

 We reach 85 mph on the 60 mph highway, the wind whipping my small amount of hair. This is the very reason I sport a bob in the first place. "Are you crazy?" Kai's words barely reach my ears before getting whipped back by the wind.

 As we hit 90 miles, a car darts in front of us to switch lanes. Sharply, I veer to the left and into the opposite lane of oncoming traffic. "Kellin! What are you doing?"

Keeping my speed, I weave in and out of the oncoming cars. "This is death, Makai!" I screech. "It's coming at us head-on." 

 Two semi-trucks run close together, side by side. We hit 100 mph and glide between them. I think Makai yelps in pain as the motorcycle jerks, but I can't quite hear him. Once we pass between the trucks, I cut off a car and enter the other traffic lane. There's a sharp turn up ahead and it's advised that we drive 45 mph. Frowning, I lower to 90 miles and make the turn. My helmet flies off at the abrasive manoeuvre and my eyes dry up in an instant. Suddenly, I can't see. Suddenly, death looks like a blind girl speeding down the highway.

 I feel the motorcycle swerve to the left and into the oncoming traffic lane. Well, Makaiwanted death. That's what we're getting. 

 But then I feel the motorcycle bend to the right and decrease speed. As we slow down, I rub my eyes until I can actually see. I feel the vehicle pull over into the grass. As I regain my breath, I take in the scene.

 Makai has taken the handles of the motorcycle to guide us safely off the road. His hair is a wind-blown disaster and his eyes are rimmed red with dryness and tears. Precariously, I get off of the motorcycle. Makai leans his head onto the speedometer and his shoulders shake as he cries.

 Gently, I place a hand on his shoulder. "There's more to life than anyone realizes. And when we finally get close to what we think we want – when we finally get close to death –you discover what you really want." 

 Makai sniffles and peers at his right side. His right leg and arm are skinned up. "That semi took a piece or two of me with it," he explains. 

 "I'm sorry," I apologize. 

Makai shakes his head. "Don't be. I was an idiot. I thought I wanted to die, but doing all of those crazy things... made me realize I wanted anything but that. Thank you, Kellin. You're as wise as they come."

I hold up a hand. "No thanks needed."

"Where did you learn to drive like that?" he asks.

Shrugging, I say, "Live and learn."

"Well you need to calm your ass down if that's how you're living," he grunts.

"No need to tell me twice," I admit. "You're not the only one who learned a thing or two today."

There's a silence between us before Makai speaks up. "I still want money for those fries, though..."