Author's note: Quotes 3, 4, and 5 with bold letters. 

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"So what's the plan, Barkeep?" an unshaven man asked. His left foot was bandaged and minus it's shoe. His clothes were raggedy.  

"I, too, would like to know what you have in mind, Miss." inquired a young man with a face smooth as a baby's bottom, though he was also wearing torn clothing.

The woman wore a formal dress shirt with slacks. "There is no plan. Nestor, you're not going to be in on any kind of action with that injury."

"What do you mean by that?" inquired the young man.

"Look, kid, we only know that the Great White Demon has the Device inside and plans to crack it open. The higher-ups just said good luck and sent us off on a cockamamie mission."

"I can fight! It's just a scratch." said Nestor, the injured one.

The woman addressed as Barkeep poked his foot. Immediately, Nestor was gritting his teeth in pain, refusing to cry out.

"See? Perfectly fine." he wheezed. 

"You're not going anywhere. Just fiddle around with the Radio. Check out the Bandwidths."

Nestor grumbled, but he set up the Radio's equipment. In a matter of minutes, there was a complex network of wires and antenna. 

 "For goodness' sake, kid! Never trust any complicated cocktail that remains perfectly clear until the last ingredient goes in, and then immediately clouds." Barkeep and Adney were huddling over a cloudy liquid in a fancy bottle.

"They said it would help us!" 

Barkeep poured the cloudy liquid onto the ground, then brought out a flask. She took a long swig."What I have in my hand here is the good stuff. Spirytus Rektyfikowany. Though seeing as you're a namby-pamby, you can have Good Ol' Sailor Vodka."

"No thank you. I'll just stick to my holy wine, seeing as 96% ABV or 85% ABV are both liable to kill me. Why aren't you affected by such strong alcohol?"

"Heh. Shockingly, the namby-pamby knows his ABVs. Alright, time to go." Barkeep got up, showing no hint of inebriation. She ran at a superhuman speed, even though she had just imbibed enough alcohol to kill a grown man.

"Excuse me! I can't keep up!"

Barkeep ran back and grabbed Adney's collar, dragging him along.

"Is this the result of the alcohol?" Adney asked.

"No, not at all. This is my normal speed." she replied. They soon arrived at great, towering imitation tree carved of creamy beryllonite. It was an impressive sight to behold, the "tree" standing several leagues tall.

Barkeep kicked the heavy, metal doors. They opened with a satisfying boom!. Barkeep slung Adney up onto his feet.

They had walked into a large church room, containing things like pews. The majority of the tree was hollow and empty. Sculptures depicting scenes of mass destruction had been carved straight into the sides of the tree. 

Wedding decorations like flowers covered the space before them. In the midst of the wispy cloth stood a humanoid figure dressed in a snow colored suit, a suit so bright it was almost blinding. He was by the altar, caressing an iridescent orb.

"Welcome to my wedding with Chaos!" this was the Great White Demon. He laughed, simultaneously dismissing them with his deadly eyes.

Adney gaped, not expecting this kind of decor from a demon bent on destroying the world.

"Over the centuries, mankind has tried many ways of combating the forces of evil...prayer, fasting, good works and so on. Up until Doom, no one seemed to have thought about the double-barrel shotgun. Eat leaden death, demon!" Adney shouted, snapping out of his daze. Adney pumped the demon full of lead, but alas, his moment of glory lasted a whopping ten seconds. A large tail swatted Adney into the wall, where he fell. The beryllonite grew into restraints.

It was just down to Barkeep and the Great White Demon. They stared each other in the eye, sizing each other up. The Great White Demon slowly put the iridescent Device down for a moment. Then suddenly, simultaneously, the two launched out. They moved at a dizzying speed, faster than Barkeep was before. The Great White Demon kept Barkeep at a distance with his tail. Barkeep snarled, feral and lashing out with a dozen strange inky claws that had emerged from her arms. They ricocheted off the walls, destroying the carvings. Higher and higher they climbed, clashing every so often.

Until at last, someone fell to the ground, spent. It wasn't the Great White Demon. Faster and faster, Barkeep plummeted into the ground and was then swept into the wall, over by Adney, beryllonite restraints growing. 

The Great White Demon disdainfully walked over to the altar. Picking the Device up, he caressed it. Then he set it down again. 

"My moment of glory! And there's nothing you can do to stop it." 

"I can stop it." 

"You just can't fathom my greatness." 

"Go on, prove me wrong. Destroy the fabric of the universe. See if I care."

The Great White Demon took a hammer, which he then raised high above his head, and brought smashing down on the Device. It didn't do a thing. The Great White Demon tried repeatedly, but failed every time. 

He stormed over to Barkeep. 

"What did you do?!" He screamed, face close to Barkeep's. 

"Surprise!" She grinned. Sucking in a large mouthful of air, Barkeep expelled a crystalline mist straight into the Great White Demon's face. She kept it up for quite the while, until the Great White Demon was on the floor and the restraints had shrunk. 

Rubbing her wrists, Barkeep walked over to the Device. She picked it up. 

"Time to blow this place." Barkeep said, a strange inky claw holding a curious box. 

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The beryllonite tree came crashing down, long after Barkeep, Adney and Nestor had left. Gone were the remaining traces of the Great White Demon. When a tree falls and no one is around, does it make a sound?