"There are all kinds of addicts, I think. We all have pain. And we are all looking for ways to make the pain go away. "

- Sherman Alexie, The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian

Todoroki became a common face during Izuku's training.

Aizawa made it count as an extracurricular activity, but the truth was that Endeavor had not been happy about his son having to train after class, because this would make him unable to train with him at home. Nedzu spoke to the hero, who eventually had to agree with him.

Izuku was right, Nedzu was good into getting what he wanted.

Todoroki seemed especially happy to do something that had irritated his father and yet freed him from the training that he clearly did not want to attend.

The funny thing was that Todoroki wasn't exactly helpful in the training.

They had tested why Izuku's quirk was fixed with Todoroki's, but nothing was conclusive besides that his quirk was weird. Evenmore, Todoroki refused to use his fire to test anything and the insistence only drove him away for a few days and lead to him not answering Izuku's messages. So apart from when he activated his quirk by accident, Todoroki didn't really do much but participate in the warm-up, unleash bizarre theories about Izuku's quirk, and act as a weight when Aizawa made Izuku lift him in the air.

Aizawa let him stay for perhaps the same reason as Todoroki: to annoy Endeavor. He didn't seem to be much of a fan of the other hero. Or maybe it was because the other teenager's company was an incentive for Izuku to socialize.

Izuku would have laughed in his face if he had no control, because the thought that Todoroki would help him socialize was hilarious.

Izuku, however, had nothing to complain about it. He was very fond of Todoroki's company, even when he insisted on trying to make combo attacks with him, as if Izuku would one day need it.

"I'm not training to the heroes class, you know that right?"

They walked across the nearly empty campus, Aizawa falling behind to pack up and talk to Power Loader about something they couldn't know.

"Then why are you doing this?"

Izuku wrinkled his nose.

"Because if I can't control it, I could destroy everything. This thing is broken."

Todoroki looked at him sideways, a curious expression on his face.

"Do you hate your quirk or are you afraid of it?"

Izuku didn't answer, turning his face away and looking at the lights of the main building, or he would call the only friend of his age a hypocrite on his face.

"Izuku-"

"Deku."

They both turned at the same time, seeing Bakugou leaning against the wall of the building. Waiting for him, even though the class had ended two hours ago.

Izuku expected to be defensive but he was too tired. Days avoiding Bakugou did that to you.

"Bakugou."

"Half-and-half, what are you doing here?"

"He is with me. What do you want ?"

Bakugou took a deep breath. When he lifted his head, his expression was the most neutral Izuku had seen in years. Or ever.

"Can we talk?"

Maybe it's the fact that Bakugou didn't ask for anything, he just demanded what he thought he was entitled to. This was something new.

Or maybe because Izuku felt that he needed it too, this talk.

"Fine."

.............

Todoroki coming along was nothing new, Izuku knew he wouldn't leave him alone with Bakugou. And really, he didn't mind talking in front of him. Bakugou complained, but when Izuku shrugged he couldn't do anything about it.

The three of them sat on the floor in front of the main building, leaning against the wall and near the shadows, so that they would see when Aizawa came.

Izuku felt calm, his quirk sated and his bones tired. His mind was clear, unlike the last time they had seen each other. Todoroki sat beside him, the comforting warmth helping him, as always.

Bakugou looked at him in the same neutral way as before. He wondered who finally had gotten into his head that screaming would give him nothing in this situation.

Like this, he could see more clearly the differences from the boy he had seen months ago. This Bakugou looked tired. There were dark circles below his eyes, which also looked different, older.

"What happened, Deku?"

Izuku looked at him, his face turned slightly, still silent. Bakugou clenched his jaw, but his voice was almost calm.

"You're gone. Your mother was crazy trying to find you, she disappears and you show up, different with that hair and a quirk ."

Izuku sighed, his eyes focusing on his crooked hands.

"I don't know."

"YOU-"

Bakugou took a deep breath, seeming to regain control.

"You don't know."

He looked disbelieving. Incredulous. Izuku bit his cheek inside and looked at Todoroki, who was also looking at him with mild curiosity.

"The last thing I remember is getting my notebook from where you threw it."

They both stiffened at that, but Izuku ignored them, fiddling with dark nails.

"I went through the school gates and everything goes dark after that. I woke up in the woods, not knowing how I got there and with this ... quirk out of control. I walked for a while until I got help. They said that ... hum, it was too traumatic and so I just-"

He gestured with his hands, unsure of how to finish, but they seemed to understand nonetheless. He noticed them watching his hair and then his shaking hands. Todoroki took one of them and squeezed it lightly.

Izuku didn't care. It seemed like a natural thing to do. His voice was soft, a tone of sudden understanding.

"You said your quirk was forced to appear, so that's why."

Todoroki was more perceptive than people credited him for. Izuku nodded, his eyes focused on their hands.

"You don't remember."

Bakugou's tone had an unknown emotion, but he didn't look up to see what was it.

"The villain's attack? All Might?"

He shook his head.

The three were silent for a few seconds when he noticed the same strange voice in Bakugou.

"Deku ... Izuku. Look at me."

He looked up at that, surprised. Bakugou's eyes were tormented. There was some humidity there that left him dumbfounded and silent. He hasn't seen him cry in years. Or call him by his name, for that matter.

"I was the last person who saw you before you disappeared. Two corners to your house, that's where I left you behind. You never came home."

Izuku understood there that Bakugou felt responsible for what had happened. The same way that he had blamed him during their fight. After cooling his head he felt terrible about it.

Bakugou was just a boy.

An arrogant boy with a powerful quirk and skills, but just a boy. What could have he done differently? Would it have changed anything?

Izuku was just sure he didn't want what had happened to him to anyone, much less Bakugou.

"There was no way you could-"

"Shut up!"

He closed his mouth, watching the other sniffle. He no longer felt angry with Bakugou. He only felt pity for such a big burden at his back, but he knew him well enough to know he wouldn't appreciate it, so just fell silent.

............ ..

When Aizawa arrived the three were still silent.

He looked at them, assessing the situation. Bakugou with red eyes, Todoroki looking solemn while holding Izuku's hand in comfort.

He sighed and took them home.

.....................

The next day Izuku accepted Nedzu's offer and hesitantly began to seek therapy.

He wanted to make sure that no ugly thoughts like before would take shape. He would not let what happened to change him more than it already had done.

.................. ...

The date of the sports festival came fast and in the days until then Todoroki seemed more and more strange. His messages were vague and he threw himself into practice with ferocity, willing to win the competition at all costs. Izuku couldn't understand what was happening but tried to encourage him positively.

He also noticed pretty fast that there was something extremely wrong about Todoroki's home situation and his relationship with his family, especially his father.

He didn't understand much about fathers, never having one, but he liked to think that Aizawa-

"Better not even think about it. Nope, I'm not going there. "

Izuku had a terrible habit of clinging to people.

He was even getting closer to the rest of Aizawa's class lately, since it was common to see him with Todoroki and they knew there was something strange about his volatile relationship with Bakugou. Izuku no longer had lunch alone or with the teachers, that was a fact.

When the festival arrived Aizawa was still bandaged and the investigation about Izuku's mom had stopped temporarily. All police forces were heavily invested in the attacks of vigilante Stain who had already killed 17 heroes and left more than 20 crippled. The therapy had not helped him remember anything, but he was trying to be patient, even though the nightmares were becoming more and more brutal, in a strange mix between Aizawa's body after USJ and the door.

So it was to be expected that on the day of the festival Izuku would be restless and evasive, to the point that Aizawa almost left him at home. Armed with a syringe of suppressants, something he had hardly used in recent weeks, Mochi and Sushi, he climbed into the cabin with Aizawa and Yamada and prepared to watch what was coming.

Early on he realized that yes, he had good reason to be worried about Todoroki.

In the break after the second test, he took courage and went down to the stadium.

...........................................................................

"There is nothing wrong with wanting to win."

Izuku felt frustrated, but it was the first time that his frustration with Todoroki had no built-in amusement, just annoyance and worry.

"I didn't say it, but the fight hasn't started yet and you already have hypothermia. Yeah, I'm not blind, I recognize the signals too well from experience."

Todoroki stopped where he was walking in front of him with purposeful large strides. Izuku tried not to feel hurt by it as he lift his chin and planted himself in the other path.

"That's none of your business, Midoriya"

His voice was as icy as his quirk, the hostile look was on him from above and Izuku felt terrible.

"I'm sorry for being an idiot and worrying about my friend."

"I didn't come to U.A to make friends, Midoriya. Don't get in my way."

The phrase hit him almost physically and he took a step back.

Izuku bit his lip and tried to control his tears. Todoroki's expression twisted, he opened his mouth to speak, but Izuku just shook his head. He had been through this several times. He knew that story well. He would not be like old Izuku in this, he would not run after a one-sided friendship.

This thought made him angry. He didn't know if with Todoroki or himself.

"Fuck you, then."

"Bakugou is really a bad influence."

He turned to leave before his quirk could lose control. A warm hand gripped his wrist and stopped him. He looked down at the hand and up at Todoroki, who released him slowly, his face almost panicked.

"I ... Midoriya. Wait. I'm sorry."

"What, Todoroki?"

He was feeling totally defensive right now.

Todoroki sighed tiredly, leaning back against the wall and rubbing his face.

"I don't know how to do this."

"Do what?"

"Deal with people, be a friend, but ... I don't want you to leave."

Izuku felt the anger dissipate at once, leaning against the wall in front of him.

"Me neither."

They were both a mess. Todoroki stared at him through his fingers, his eyes on his, his expression seeming to ponder something until it became resolute.

"Midoriya, have you ever heard about quirk marriages?"

...........................................................................

At least his quirk had good taste. Izuku now knew why it hated Endeavor so much. Izuku touched the suppressant in his pocket, wondering if it was worth using it now, because surely he felt something expanding in his chest.

"That's why I have to win the festival without using his quirk. I have to prove that I don't need him to be a hero."

And the situation just got more complicated. Izuku knew he wasn't the best person to advise on trauma, he couldn't even verbalize what he was sure had happened to him because just thinking about the word made him want to rip his skin off. But Izuku knew about quirks and especially about their negative effects. He knew that what Todoroki was doing could render him disabled one day if nothing worse happened by then. Unlike his broken quirk, Todoroki's was complete, perfectly balanced. He was purposely incapacitating himself.

"Shoto."

The name came out easily, without formalities. They were past that.

The other looked at him, his face still stormy after throwing his demons out.

"I understand where you came from, but don't you think the effect is quite the opposite? You're letting him further dictate your life when you incapacitated yourself because of him."

Shoto's expression closed even more and Izuku spoke faster.

"You're hurting yourself-"

"I won't use his quirk, Midoriya. This is final. I won't do what he wants."

"But that's the problem, isn't it? The quirk is not-"

"Don't be a hypocrite, not you, who hates your quirk. I thought you would understand that-"

"Let me talk!"

He stamped his foot, the tunnel trembling slightly above them, dust falling on their heads. Izuku took a deep breath, closing his eyes. At least this time Todoroki was silent, waiting for him to recover.

"This is different."

He opened his eyes and stared at the other boy firmly.

"I don't want to be a hero, I can't be one. Never. You do. You will probably be able to graduate using only your ice. But one day there will come a situation, out of school, in real life, where you'll have a choice, where using your quirk completely will be the difference between saving someone or not. This is a weight you will have to carry, Shoto, someone's life-"

"Blood on the walls. Cold and silence. A still body, crooked as a broken toy. "

"Izuku?"

He shook his head, putting his hand over his mouth to prevent the sudden urge to vomit. Shoto touched his shoulder, his expression less guarded now, his eyes searching his face.

"I don't want you to carry that weight, Shoto. Don't let your dad take it from you."

The other's expression looked conflicted, but the stubbornness was clear there.

Before he could say anything else they heard clapping in the stands, Kayama's voice announcing that the next round was about to begin.

"I gotta go."

Shoto stared at him in conflict, staring down the hall and his possibly very pale face.

"I'll take you to Sensei."

"No, go. I will be fine. Think about what I said, all right? This conversation is not over."

Only when the other one came out of the tunnel did he realize that they were not alone, the other known source of heat was very close. Izuku turned around feeling annoyed.

"Bakugou, hearing something intimate from someone else without permission is terrible."

The other came out from behind the wall, a petulant expression on his face, but he knew him well enough to know that he was shaken.

"Good"

"If you don't leave soon you will lose your turn."

"Fuck you, Deku."

He showed the middle finger in response when the other walked away. Maybe he was around Bakugou too much lately.

"I'm rooting for Shoto! I hope he'll kick your ass!"

He almost laughed when he heard the explosion and the outraged scream.

"WHAT DID YOU SAY?"

He left quickly before he returned.

................................................... ...

When Shoto threw an iceberg that covered half the arena he sighed and went back down from the cabin.

......................................................

He felt it even before he saw him.

Endeavor had a very particular heat that made his quirk stir in a bad way.

He saw them in the hallway, Endeavor's body looking huge compared to Shoto's. The man raged, his fists clenched and his face flaming.

In his mind came the same image, but a much smaller Shoto. A child, vulnerable. Unable to defend himself.

"Unable to do anything to stop his mother from getting hurt."

Izuku hoped to lose control there, but the effect was the opposite, as if it were the first time he and his quirk had come to terms with something.

It was the first time he had felt totally in control.

He felt the balloon in his chest expand, the sensation of Endeavor's unpleasant heat coming. Izuku took that sensation to himself and just pulled, the balloon expanding until it opened, filling every part of his body, making the energy flow to his fingertips, vibrating with anticipation. It was a new sensation, not to feel suffocated by his own quirk.

He would keep Endeavor's astonished face forever as the flames suddenly vanished from his face. He saw him try to light up them again but Izuku kept pulling.

Shoto saw him, his eyes were wide, lips trembling in almost a smile. Izuku winked and beckoned him away, his eyes on the back of the hero who seemed to be trying to figure out what was going on with his own quirk, probably looking for Aizawa nearby.

Shoto stepped aside and Izuku, with the greatest satisfaction he had ever felt using his quirk so far, let the energy flow through his body and pushed.

Endeavor almost flew out of the tunnel, falling into the arena.

The two boys looked at each other, both wide-eyed. Izuku knew he was in trouble, Aizawa would know who had done it on the spot, yet he couldn't regret it.

Not when he heard Shoto's laughter for the first time.

...................................................... ..

They gave a longer break to the final battle. Izuku walked with Shoto to the room where he would prepare for the fight against Bakugou. He knew there was not much to do for the other to change his mind, just as he knew that with only half quirk Shoto would never beat Bakugou.

"I know what you're thinking."

He looked at the other curiously.

"I didn't know that you could read minds, Shoto."

"You don't understand. His power-"

"You keep saying that, that it's his power. I'll tell you something, my quirk loves your quirk, but hates Endeavor's."

Shoto turned his face slightly, his brow furrowed, reminding him again of Mochi. Izuku stopped at the door and looked inside, seeing Bakugou muttering something on the table, purposely ignoring them.

"I mean, it's your power. It's your quirk. And you will be a hero with it and fuck Endeavor, this has nothing to do with him if you don't want to."

Shoto's face at that moment was something he wanted to keep forever. An expression of disbelief, as if he'd told him the secret about time travel.

He couldn't explain then why he tiptoed and kissed Todoroki's check quickly.

"Good luck, Shoto."

Izuku walked down the hall and turned the corner without looking back, only when he no longer saw him he widened his eyes in disbelief and started to panic.

"What the hell was that?"

................................. ..

When the stadium burned down, Izuku forgot his mortification.

His quirk moved in his chest, reaching the heat that was everywhere. Satisfied and happy.

Izuku focused on Shoto's smile below, Bakugou's excited face, and also felt strangely satiated.

Shoto won the festival.

.............................................

Izuku couldn't stay and celebrate with Shoto. In the middle of the ceremony, Aizawa received word of what had happened to Ingenium and they went home early to see him in the hospital. The two had studied at U.A at the same time and were old friends.

Izuku managed to talk to the wounded hero briefly, but it was enough to see, not for the first time, how often bad things happened to good people.

................................................

After the festival things were similar but different at the same time, like everything else in Izuku's life.

Everything had changed a little, something that seemed minimal, but it was like trying to navigate in a once-known terrain when someone moved everything 5 cm away. It sounds small, but it makes you stumble all the time.

The main change, however, was his relationship with Shoto, and not just because they now corresponded each other with their first name. There was something else that he couldn't quite understand but he knew that it wasn't bad. Not bad at all.

He was almost beginning to think that the heat in his chest when he saw Shoto was not just because of his quirk.

Shoto also looked at him differently, but it was Shoto, he was never sure what was going on in that head of his.

"So are you going to do your internship with Endeavor?"

The other shrugged.

"I can't lie and say he's not the best. If I want to understand my quirk, this is where I have to go."

Izuku didn't like the idea but understood his reasons. A little bit.

"Good luck then. The internship is in Hosu, right? Where Stain's last attacks took place."

His chest tightened a little at that and he felt Shoto push his shoulder into his where they sat stretching. Aizawa told them to go ahead and warm up, apparently, he would bring in a new student to train with them.

"You don't need to worry about me."

He huffed briefly.

"I always worry about you, It is what friends do. "

For some reason, he thought he saw Shoto blush slightly at this.

"Izuku, may I ask you a question?"

He stretched out touching his toes, feeling the pleasurable clicks on his back

"You already did it."

Izuku could almost feel Shoto's annoyance from afar and smiled.

"Two questions, then."

"You just did it."

He stretched one leg forward, bending the other and throwing his body aside. He was glad to see that he now had some muscle. It was so hard to keep fit with a quirk like his.

"Four questions."

Izuku smiled, stretching his other leg and throwing himself on the other side.

"You already have."

"When?"

"Just now"

The push he received was deserved, but no less painful. They scrambled inelegantly, his quirk almost purring contentedly with their proximity. In the end, Shoto immobilized him shamefully fast, sitting on his waist and holding his arms crossed in front of him.

Izuku was momentarily worried, waiting to panic over the position, something that happened often, even when was Aizawa fighting him. It was hard to get away from the terrible feeling that being like this always caused.

This time there was nothing but the excitement of his quirk and action-flushed faces. They both breathed fast and he felt his face hurt from smiling so wide. Months ago he couldn't think that this would be possible.

Shoto looked at him with a much smaller smile, but it was there. He saw him lean slightly, his face turned in curiosity.

"Why did you kiss me?"

So that was the question. His face flushed widely and he tried to deflect it, but it was difficult with Shoto looking at him like that.

"For good luck?"

He moaned at his own awkward response, but Shoto didn't look annoyed, just even more curious. Thoughtful. He watched him frown, pondering something before he nodded resolutely.

"Is that so? In this case-"

Shoto lowered his head so fast that he couldn't prepare himself. The kiss hit the corner of his mouth and Shoto nearly hurt his nose from their clumsiness. Still, his heart pounded, eyes darting between Shoto's eyes and mouth quickly as he pulled back to see his reaction.

Shoto's eyes softened. Izuku saw him move almost in slow motion, ready to lower his head again, but a very angry voice interrupted the moment.

"It wasn't this kind of warm-up that I was talking about."

Aizawa's scarf took Shoto off him faster than Izuku ever saw him use it.

Izuku covered his face with his hands, feeling his cheeks in flames. He turned and cringed, peering at his guardian through his fingers. Aizawa still had Shoto strapped to his scarf, his hair floating. Beside him was a familiar face from the festival. The tired eyes and messy hair, as well as the strange smile, reminded him terribly of Aizawa.

"This is Hitoshi Shinsou, he will train with us from today."

Aizawa dropped Shoto to the ground higher than he deserved it, but Izuku chose not to say anything.

......................................................

"Hey, Izuku."

Shoto frowned, staring where Hitoshi was running around the area and Aizawa sitting under a tree, whose eyes were more alert than usual during these sessions.

"Hmm?"

"That sounds a little absurd, but hear me out. Shinsou and Sensei. Don't you think they look a lot alike?"

"Shoto-"

"Do you think he's sensei's secret son? That makes you brothers, right?"

Izuku let out a small laugh. Shoto was really something.

.................................................

"Do you think you can run away from me? There is nothing more to you than me now. You deserve a lesson for that. "

Sometimes Izuku could remember the feeling clearly, especially after waking up from a nightmare. The heavy object coming against his hands, the impossibility of moving and running away from the pain as the bones seemed to pulverize under the hammer.

His hands were such an important part of him, before. With them, he wrote his analyzes and draw detailed hero sketches. It was his great pride, the only thing he thought he did right in life. Now? He couldn't even hold a pen to write without feeling pain. The therapy helped, but there was only so much that even Recovery Girl could do. By the time when he arrived at the hospital, he had been lucky to have nothing amputated.

He looked down at his ruined fingers and sighed, giving up on holding the chopsticks.

He swung his feet on the table outside the building, green eyes searching for Shoto who must have already left for the break. Shinsou had stolen Mochi and was taking a nap, lying sprawled on the bench, his too long legs sticking out at the end.

He was a peculiar fellow, Shinsou. His quirk also gave him a bad feeling but Izuku refrained from saying anything. God knew he was already self-conscious enough with all the things he heard about it in his life and Izuku felt that the problem was not Shinsou's quirk itself, but some association his fractured mind was trying to make. What's more, Izuku really liked Shinsou, something about how he looked so much like Aizawa. Or maybe Izuku just became close to the most traumatized and socially inept people, it must be a gift.

"Sensei is talking to him."

And talking about socially inept people.

He looked up at the familiar voice and Bakugou was already sitting at the table and taking off his bento. Izuku looked at him curiously, because it was rare to see him alone. He always had a squad behind him, although these, unlike the ones he remembered at school, were really good people. It was funny to see how the most enthusiastic students in the class had adopted the class Grinch.

"Who?"

"Half-and-half."

"Shoto?"

He looked at him as if to say 'who else?'

Izuku blinked even more curiously. Bakugou helping him. Go figures. Kirishima and the others were really making progress.

He looked out of the corner of his eye at his old childhood friend eating and ignoring him. Shinsou opened one eye and stared at him questioningly. Izuku just shrugged.

"To be fair, he's changed. My disappearance really messed with him. "

They never got back to the subject, but he noticed how he usually spent a long time staring at his hair or his scars. Like now, Bakugou was staring at his trembling hands as he tried to pick up a chopstick again.

He also noticed the way he moved around him, especially when his hyper-excited class ended up making Izuku too anxious or he was getting nervous around a teacher when he was with Bakugo's class.

Bakugou has always been intelligent and intuitive, beneath all his brash attitude. Izuku knew he had done his research and had a sense of what had happened to him.

"What is the thing between you and the half-and-half?"

The question seemed disinterested, but Izuku felt the blood rise on his face. Immediately he began to play with his own fingers and heard a suspicious laugh coming from the form lying on the bench.

"My quirk likes his heat."

Bakugou stopped the curry near his mouth and stared at him incredulously. And then he gave what looked suspiciously like a laugh, his sarcastic voice quite evident.

"What are you? A damn cat?"

Izuku became even more mortified, his mouth opening and closing for a reply.

He didn't have one.

.................................................. ...............

Things were going well for Izuku. He had new friends, a better relationship with his quirk, and he had Aizawa. Izuku also had Shoto, which was something else, maybe his best friend, but the term didn't seem enough anymore.

He wasn't totally happy, not without his mother around, not with the nightmares. It was like blinking and suddenly everything around disappeared and he was facing the door. Izuku sometimes woke up at night not knowing if all the good things were just a dream,

Still, he was getting better, he was healing.

And like everything in his life, whenever it started to come into balance, that was when something terrible was going to happen.

.................................................

Maybe there was some law about his life, Izuku thought, which ordered that when something went wrong, it would go as badly as possible and in every way possible.

That night in Hosu would be in many people's nightmares for a long time, it was one such example of disasters followed, with Noumus attacking and Stain on the loose, wounded heroes and an uncontrolled quirk out.

For Izuku it all started when he decided to take the train alone between the prefectures. Aizawa was on patrol and Kayama, who was about to come to stay with him, was called in at the last minute. Izuku offered the option of staying at home, but Aizawa denied that. He would return home and bring him to the agency. His guardian seemed uneasy about something and didn't want Izuku to be alone.

By agreement, he convinced him not to return just to pick him up, since the train from his house to the agency had only two stations and Izuku was feeling particularly brave that day. He was already on campus by himself, had gone to the market without panicking, and at that time the train was almost always vacant. Besides, by this point, he was confident that he could defend himself if attacked. Izuku couldn't hide forever.

He could do it.

And in the beginning, everything went well. The train was almost empty, no one came to talk to him. He sat in the backseat, his red hood up high covering his white hair and headphones on, Mochi was quite safe sleeping inside his coat.

When the train passed Hosu, that was when it all went wrong. Izuku felt it before turning to the window. The heat, even at this distance, made his quirk uneasy. He rose from his seat and looked out, his eyes widening at the sight of chaos in the city.

He felt the impact on one of the wagons, causing people to fall to the ground and scream. The train stopped and he heard a shrill and terrifying sound. Something broke into his wagon and Izuku hugged Mochi safely, seeing a giant creature pass through the metal easily, coming toward the people who cringed in terror.

Izuku didn't really have to think. He felt the sensation of his quirk take over his body, almost as a survival mechanism, the energy covering his fingertips and up his arms. Izuku pulled, hearing the ominous crack of bone breaking as the monster strained forcibly before being thrown by the glass of the train falling below the tracks.

He ignored the whispers around, people staring at him warily as they saw him stopping the monster in a matter of seconds. Izuku felt the chill on his body, but the heat that came from burning Hosu didn't let him feel that way for long.

He looked down, still appalled by the scenery.

"Oh no, Shoto."

He pulled out the phone and sent messages in a row, but they were not seen.

Izuku might not be able to throw all his blame on luck, it helped that he had a tendency to make stupid decisions. For those who didn't want to be a hero, he liked to get into someone else's problems quite often.

The safest thing for him really would be to stay on the train with the passengers, where heroes were beginning to arrive to take people to safety.

Izuku jumped from the window to the tracks, using his quirk to momentarily float and cushion the fall.

He ran toward the chaos.

...............................................

Izuku was no hero. He could never be one.

It was what he repeated to himself whenever he interfered with an attack within Hosu. He just wanted to find Shoto, saving people was just a consequence.

Even with all the fire around him, he was starting to feel cold. He had never used his quirk so continuously and he was sure that what he was doing at the moment could be a crime of vigilance, but when people shouted for help he had to intervene.

"No one came for you. No one heard you. You screamed and screamed and no one came. "

He gritted his teeth and pulled, a Noumu toward him and then pushing it away on the wall of a building. He entered the crowd when he saw the heroes looking for who had done this. He could feel a metallic taste in his mouth, a pain in his abdomen for using so much energy without a replacement.

Trying to use his quirk in small doses so as not to lose control and do more damage than help needed more energy than he could imagine, and he felt the balloon in his chest expand and move unsatisfied. It was hard to breathe like this.

He felt suffocated and moved from the crowd to the sidewalk, running in the direction his cell phone was pointing at Endeavor's agency. Someone pulled his bag in despair, things falling out of it. Mochi jumped out of his arms and ran away. He gave chase toward her.

That's when he ran into Stain and Tensei's brother.

.................................................. ...........................

Izuku: Shoto?

Izuku: I'm in Hosu.

Izuku: Let me know if you're alright.

Izuku: I'm worried.

Izuku sent his location.

.................................................. .....

Aizawa watched the news about Hosu on the agency television, where he had returned to wait for his boy, who should have arrived some time ago.

The image of the train standing on the tracks assured him that something had happened.

He took the phone from his pocket to call, already heading for the door.

That's when he saw the message with the location.

..................................................

Getting in between the danger and someone else was as familiar as breathing, and it wasn't even the first time someone he was trying to help refused it.

Iida was a person he didn't know well, they had talked a few times, but he had not seen him as a person who would do something like that.

"Pain does that to people, you know it more than anyone else."

"This doesn't concern you! Go, Midoriya!"

He smiled because it was all so familiar. Stain had been looking at him curiously since he'd entered the alley, in his civilian clothes and short stature.

"Your brother will want you to come home, Iida. Don't worry, I asked for help."

Stain laughed and Izuku stood better in front of the two fallen ones.

"The attitude of a hero, to get involved even when your life is at risk."

Izuku tried not to cringe at that, his eyes hardening.

"I'm not a hero."

He clenched his hands into fists and braced himself, eyeing all the blades on the vigilante's body. That was totally out of his league.

"And yet you behave better than these fake ones-"

Izuku threw the vigilante hard against the wall, pulling him and throwing him against the other.

"I hate monologues."

A knife came toward him and the chaos began.

.................................................. .....

As the known heat approached, his feelings were contradictory. He was glad he was no longer alone, terrified that Shoto would be in danger and his quirk moved excitedly in his chest, already reaching for its favourite heat source.

Izuku swallowed the blood in his mouth, unwilling to risk letting the vigilante paralyze him.

The flames engulfed the alley, making a barrier between Izuku and danger, as the first time they'd seen each other.

"Couldn't you be more specific, Izuku?"

...................................................

Maybe they could have won, all three of them together. Even though Izuku was trying hard not to lose control all the time, already at his limit. Shoto must have known that as he stood often in front of him and took the attacks.

"I said that one day we might need the combos."

Izuku refused to answer it. They could win. They had understood Stain's quirk, help was coming, they just had to stop him from hurting anyone else.

It was so close.

Until Izuku was paralyzed.

"Izuku!"

"Midoriya!"

He fell like a broken doll to the floor, unable to move. His quirk pounded furiously in his chest, the feeling of energy was still there, but he couldn't focus on anything.

Shoto called for him and Izuku watched him try to reach him and defend himself at the same time.

The small control he still had seemed even smaller, the metal of the dumpster twisting close, the ground cracking beneath his body. His quirk was twisting in desperation, wanting freedom and to protect.

Shoto calling his name, getting hurt, trying to protect him.

"Your mother calling your name, getting hurt, trying to protect you."

While he was paralyzed, unable to do anything but watch.

"Vulnerable, without power, without choice. "

And suddenly he was no longer there. His eyes glazed over the scene, the alley fading. It was all just that door. The door, rotten and bloodstained. The door that only exuded death and pain.

"Izuku! Run! Get away from here!"

He was so close that he could touch it. Hear the sentences behind it clearly. The screams for his name.

His screams.

"How will the cat be when you open the door? Dead or alive?"

Izuku touched the ruined doorknob and opened it.

.................................................. .........................

"Who killed the Schrodinger's cat?"

.................................................. ..............................

Aizawa arrived in the chaos just in time to see Iida save Todoroki from being impaled.

Just in time to hear his boy scream.

A scream from deep in his chest, tormented and terrified, that should never get out of anyone's mouth, even more of a child.

The surrounding walls trembled, the cars on the street set off alarms, and the posts twisted toward them. The energy was so strong that they were thrown back, his scarf holding his students before they could go any further.

His body went suddenly cold as if all the heat around them was sucked. He looked at Izuku and saw a strange shape around him, almost transparent if not for the high density, circling around his child and moving with fury.

It was the first time that Todoroki's ridiculous notion of Izuku's quirk resembling Tokoyami's made any sense.

He quickly checked Todoroki and Iida, noting blood. His students were injured. They got injured and he wasn't there to help. Izuku was injured and was not there, he had arrived late again.

More heroes arrived at the scene, some going to Stain, others going to his boy.

"Don't hurt him!"

Endeavor's fire was gone. Aizawa caught a glimpse of Izuku's face and he saw something he had not seen before. Izuku's eyes were all white, just the sclera showing. His face went towards the hero and Endeavor was thrown against the wall.

"Eraserhead? Can you stop his quirk?"

His red eyes focused on Izuku and he saw the shape recede, only to grow again. It was like trying to reach a switch with fingertips that always came back in place. He blinked and shook his head frustrated.

"It's taking too long, it's the first time I've seen him like this. I need suppressants."

He felt his feet come off the ground and gripped the fire escape. Inside the alley, things and people floated around, the buildings nearby shaking.

"This is insane! What the hell is this quirk?"

Faster than they could predict a flying Noumu slashed and came toward Izuku. Before they could do anything the dense whitish mass attacked and the Noumu was on the ground. They heard the sound of cracking bones and the screams of the creature, but the power didn't diminish, sinking the noumu deeper and deeper until he saw blood gushing through the floor. It was violent and brutal and Aizawa had never seen Izuku like this.

"Mochi."

Todoroki's breathless voice made him look down and he saw his cat floating on his feet, a syringe in her mouth. Before he could do anything to stop him, Todoroki caught her and using his quirk to stay on the ground he drove into the centre of chaos.

"Todoroki! Don't!"

"Shoto! What are you doing?!"

Aizawa finally understood what Izuku meant when he said that his quirk liked Todoroki. Maybe it was the ice barriers he made around, but the moment he got close enough they managed to touch the ground, things falling into the alley. The form receded, wrapping both of them peacefully like a blanket until it suddenly vanished.

He ran to the two boys, Todoroki holding Izuku against his chest on his knees on the floor, the syringe still stuck in his arm. He knelt beside them and touched the kid's unconscious face.

"Hypothermia."

Todoroki nodded and Aizawa noticed that he was holding Izuku to one side, trying to warm him up. They had to go to the hospital quickly, the three boys were badly injured.

"Can you carry him? Try to raise his temperature until we reach the hospital."

"Yeah. Sensei?"

He looked at the boy's haunted eyes, it was something he had never seen before. Todoroki always had his expression too controlled for a child.

"He said that he remembered everything."

.................................................. .................

The next morning the boys were stable. Stain had been arrested, the situation in Hosu was controlled.

When the nurse came into the room to check on the still-unconscious patients, one of the beds was empty.

Izuku Midoriya had disappeared.