Warnings in this chapter: The abuse Izuku suffered is told in this chapter, although there is nothing explicit or detailed, just mentioned, read carefully if there are triggers. There are mentions of paedophilia, child abuse (physical, psychological and sexual), captivity and trauma. For those who want to skip these parts of the conversation, there is a summary of the most important points in the final notes.

"There are wounds that never show on the body that are deeper and more hurtful than anything that bleeds."

― Laurell K. Hamilton, Mistral's Kiss

Years later Aizawa would still not be sure how Izuku got to that place in the state he was in.

According to the tracks they followed to find him, he took the train and probably still walked a long time until he reached his destiny. Luckily for them, a child walking alone drew enough attention. With Ragdoll's help, they were able to find him still in that very day.

All Might found him first and soon Aizawa was there. He glanced at the number one hero standing on the edge of the clearing, unmoving and showing the most serious face he had seen on him since the attack on USJ.

Izuku was curled up on a little ball, sitting on a tree trunk and hugging his knees tightly. Around the clearing, some rocks and logs floated smoothly. Even from all way there, Aizawa could still hear his muffled sobs and all he wanted to do was go there, shake him for escaping the hospital, but most of all check out if he was hurt.

"Is he alone?"

Ragdoll looked around, her face turned slightly as her eyes went down.

"There is an empty underground space with an entrance to the surface. It's a hiding place occupying much of the clearing."

She paused and frowned.

"There is no one alive but-"

She stopped and looked at him meaningfully.

They had probably found where he was at the time he was missing then. It was the same forest he had woken up in, where they looked for clues without finding anything. If only someone had brought Ragdoll from the start.

With the sound of footsteps, he looked back and saw Naomasa with a few more cops that were helping with the search. Aizawa rubbed a hand over his eyes and entered the clearing, the others falling behind.

Even if he hadn't raised his head, he knew Izuku had noticed him. His quirk never let out a heat source nearby. When he got close enough he saw that near the trunk where he stood was an entrance, once hidden by a carpet of leaves and grass. A wooden door, rotted by rain and weather. He looked at the two heroes and pointed to the door.

Aizawa knelt in front of the curled up child, noting the tremors that passed through his body. Naomasa who was heading for the door looked at him and threw a coat. He laid the warm fabric on Izuku, rubbing his arms and sitting beside him on the trunk, waiting.

Some men came in through the door, and even from there he could smell a strong odour from there.

He felt a cold hand in his and looked down, seeing Izuku's profile staring at his feet. The boy leaned against his side and Aizawa wrapped his arms around him, resting his head on the white hair, Izuku's cold face pressed against his chest.

"Izuku? Talk to me, please."

He heard him let out the air softly, before his voice, small and shaking, could be heard.

"He had a mind-controlling quirk, it worked only with suggestions. He thought it worked for everyone, but I realized that it depended on how stubborn the person was. You could fight it off, eventually."

Aizawa squeezed him a little more and looked over his head at Naomasa, that was intent on their conversation.

"That's how he got the other boys. He could spend weeks watching them, analyzing them. He said what they wanted to hear and made them like him. No one was going to miss them, but I had my mom. It was a risk, but he really wanted me. I think the game was getting boring for him. He said-"

Izuku paused, his voice now in a disinterested tone that reminded him too much of when he began living with Aizawa. That terrible apathy that had completely disappeared in recent months.

"He stopped me at the corner of my house and came to talk to me. I woke up down here. After I learned that he spoke to mom, he tried to make her forget about me with his quirk, but it didn't work. He thought it would be easy, he said that no one wanted a quirkless child, that she was just going to need an excuse."

Aizawa closed his eyes tightly trying to control himself.

"He was wrong, your mother made hell on earth for you, Izuku."

"I know it. He said I was more work than it was worth, I was drawing a lot of attention. Hiding the evidence was ideal, but he didn't want to give up, he liked the game too much. I was a challenge. Even so, having to force me to do things made him eventually angry, he wanted me to obey, but his quirk didn't work right on me, I could break the effect very fast. I was too stubborn."

"Of course he was." Aizawa didn't know anyone more stubborn than Izuku. He was a survivor, stubbornness for a long time was the only weapon he had in his life.

"He always came at night."

"The monsters appear at night, Eraserhead."

"There was no way out, the door never opened. I almost got out once, but then -"

Izuku opened his hands in his lap, the fingers shaking. Unfortunately, Aizawa understood immediately. The bastard had done it with the kid's (Aizawa's kid) hands for trying to escape. He put him in conditioning with the damn quirk, but Izuku broke the control and so he resorted to it. And knowing how stubborn and clever Izuku was, he didn't even want to think about what else had happened.

"He brought my mom with him one night."

Aizawa heard the sound of trees falling around, but kept his eyes on the boy beside him, hugging him closer. Even now it was hard to get his quirk off, to press the broken switch that always wanted to go back in place.

"Izuku-"

It was as if he didn't hear him anymore, his voice faster and faster to the point that he could barely understand what he was saying now.

"He always said that if I tried something he would go after her. That way he could make me do what he wanted easier, convince me to not try to run away. If I did something wrong she would pay. I think ... I think mom tricked him, made it easy for him to bring her on purpose to find me."

Aizawa could see it clearly, only from the little he knew of Inko Midoriya through Naomasa. After all the things that woman had done to find her son, she could easily do something crazy like this. She wouldn't miss a chance to find her son.

"He thought his quirk had worked on her, but the moment she saw me, she attacked him. It all happened so fast ... She just wanted to stop him from getting close to me. But he was so big and so ... full of anger. I couldn't do anything to help. And mom ... he was going to kill mom. I remember... I remember feeling something snap."

He pointed to his own chest.

"On here. Something expanded and expanded and I couldn't breathe . Everything went white. He screamed and screamed and the sound of things breaking and cracking and snapping . I didn't realize right away what had happened, that it was my quirk, I just wanted him to stop hurting my mom ."

A log exploded in the clearing, splinters going in various directions. He activated his quirk and his scarf surrounded them like a shield. With Izuku's quirk off stones and logs fell to the ground. His body softened beside Aizawa, exhausted.

"Izuku, you defended her. Your quirk defended both of you."

He saw him flinch and realized that the worst was yet to come. Izuku's body trembled even more, the moment he blinked he saw the ground began to crack around them and activated his quirk immediately, his eyes burning in the process. They couldn't risk a suppressant with the dose he'd taken at the hospital.

"I think I blacked out, for a long time. Maybe even more than a day."

He saw him cover his face with his hands, his voice muffled and shaking.

"When I woke up I saw him on the floor. Bent and broken, like a cockroach , smashed against the wall. There was so much ... so much blood and mom ... my mom was near the door. I called and called for her, but she wouldn't answer me . She wouldn't move . She wasn't breathing . Her eyes were open but she couldn't see me. And her neck ... and I got it. She was too close to me at the time, trying to reach me. To help me ."

He heard Naomasa curse lowly where he was, getting the same conclusion as him.

"Oh, Izuku."

Aizawa couldn't take it anymore and blinked his eyes. He heard some voices exclaim in fright as the door was torn open and thrown away into the clearing, slamming into the tree trunks, twisting and tearing into the air. When the last piece fell Izuku's quirk finally calmed down, becoming placid. The sudden silence was almost deafening.

Now he understood why he hated his quirk so much, why he hated himself so much. He understood why he had pushed it so much into his own mind.

When he spoke again, his voice was broken, his hands gripping his own hair in despair.

"I killed my mom with my quirk."

.................................................. .....................................

"Who killed Schrodinger's cat?"

"It was you who opened the box."

.................................................. ............................

Aizawa removed the child hands from his hair with difficulty, gripping thin wrists before Izuku could hurt himself more. With one free hand, he pulled his face up gently and met his eyes with conviction.

"You didn't want to do that. Nothing was in your control, it wasn't your fault. Izuku, it was an accident."

The boy shook his head in denial and collapsed into sobs. A cry that was too painful to hear.

"It was an accident, Izuku. Are you listening to me? It was an accident."

Aizawa pressed his face into white hair and swayed him soothingly for a long time, repeating it until he felt Izuku's breath more evenly. The exhaustion of the last few days had finally reached the boy and his body melted in the hug as he reached unconscious.

Naomasa approached, his expression sombre.

"Inko?"

"We found her. We found them both."

Aizawa bit his lip, trying to control the turmoil he felt at the moment. His voice left with an accusatory tone.

"You don't look so surprised."

The man sighed and sat beside him on the trunk. He ignored how exhausted he looked.

"About his quirk? Yes, I am surprised. About the mother not being alive? Not so much."

Naomasa looked into the hiding place, where more of his men entered.

"When I caught this case, Inko Midoriya made an impression on me, even in the short time I was with her. If this woman were alive, there was nothing in the world that would prevent her from being with her son. To someone who looked so peaceful, she was a force of nature. So yes, I knew she wasn't alive anymore. Yagi was also of the same impression as me, he knew her well during this period. He spoke with an old acquaintance to confirm her condition. Since Yagi and Inko had sort of a connection, he convinced him to look into his future to find if they would meet again."

"Nighteye"

He kept that fact for later, hugging Izuku close.

"Why didn't you say anything?"

"Aizawa ... Do you think that in the state this child was in when he arrived, that he would have accepted it? Deep down he knew the truth too, but he couldn't accept it. There was a reason for him to just remember it now, when he is no longer alone to bear the impact. He is a bright kid."

He felt the anger go away and deflated in exhaustion.

"That's why you didn't force him to remember. You're giving him time."

The man sighed and nodded, reluctantly touching his shoulder. They both looked at the boy. Aizawa noticed now that only in those two days did he look much thinner. A whole day without eating with a quirk like his was dangerous.

"You can take him home. We'll take care of everything else."

All Might approached the two of them, looking out of place in his colourful clothes in the terrible scene.

"I'll escort you."

.................................................. ....................................

Aizawa refused to give Izuku to All Might, he wanted to keep him as close as possible.

The hero had been silent. Aizawa didn't know exactly what was his involvement was in the case and was curious to find out, especially with the new information he had about Inko Midoriya.

From the beginning, the hero seemed too invested in the situation, beyond what was professional and Aizawa noticed the way he looked at Izuku in U.A.

"Yagi-San."

The quiet voice made them both look at Izuku, his half-lidded green eyes were staring at All Might. Aizawa's eyes widened but All Might didn't seem surprised that the boy knew his real identity.

"Hello, Young Midoriya."

"Hi."

Aizawa smiled slightly when he heard his shy voice. The kid was really a fanboy.

"You found me."

All Might looked sad.

"A little too late, but yes. I'm sorry, my boy."

The child didn't answer, leaning his face against Aizawa's chest.

Aizawa looked at All Might in question.

"That day earlier, Young Midoriya and I had a terrible encounter. Twice. He eventually discovered my secret and I said something that was far from the truth for him, but when I went to try to remedy my mistake I didn't find him anymore."

The man clenched his fist, his expression haunted.

"If only I had gotten rid of the reporters earlier."

"It's not your fault."

Izuku's voice was tired and they both looked down again, his eyes were closed.

"All Might and Bakugou are stupid."

All Might chuckled in surprise. Aizawa knew that being fully aware Izuku wouldn't say that. He was too polite to do so.

He frowned in curiosity.

"What did you tell him?"

All Might look down with embarrassment, his expression tormented.

"Something that was not my right and far from the truth. Young Midoriya?"

"Hmm?"

"You can be a hero."

Izuku tensed in his arms and opened his eyes.

"I can not."

"Of course, you can-"

He shook his head. Eyes unfocused, face contorted in sadness, and Aizawa squeezed him a little tighter.

"I'm a villain."

He said it with such conviction as if it were the absolute truth, something too obvious that they must already know.

Aizawa would refute immediately, but All Might stepped in before he could do it.

"This isn't true! Who told you this nonsense?"

"I killed my mother."

All Might looked at him in surprise. Aizawa sighed, knowing that he would have to repeat this a lot for his problem child.

"Izuku, it was an accident. Your quirk tried to save you, protect you. If not for that you would both be dead. So no, you are not a villain. I won't let you blame yourself for surviving."

"As Eraserhead said."

All Might pointed at him and he rolled his eyes. Izuku continued to stare at him with quivering lips.

"Heroes, Young Midoriya, are humans too. They bleed, they make mistakes and difficult decisions. You may not officially want to become a hero, and that's fine. You can be anything that you want to be, but in my eyes and I know that in Eraserhead's eyes here, young Iida and Todoroki, you are already a hero. You have no idea how much you inspired me to be a better person. You are my hero, young Midoriya."

"Hum, he can make a good speech."

He looked at the other appreciatively. All Might cough in embarrassment, blood dripping from the corner of his mouth.

"Anyway, there's something characteristic of every hero, young Midoriya. Do you know what is it?"

Izuku denied, his eyes adorably wide throughout the hero's impassioned speech.

"Get in trouble for problems that don't concern them. And from what I've heard about you, it's something you do quite often."

"Too often"

Aizawa grunted. Izuku didn't answer that, he just leaned his head back against his guardian's chest and closed his eyes.

Aizawa sighed and looked at the other hero.

"Thank you for that."

All Might smiled, his face embarrassed.

"My pleasure."

.................................................. .................

Even with the body in an advanced state of decomposition, it was not difficult to find his identity, but digging into its history was far from easy. For someone with so much offence, his record was clean, probably the result of his quirk that let him get rid of his crimes.

He lived in a good neighbourhood and was well recognized in the community, paid his fees, and had the same work in a library for the last twenty years. A perfect citizen during the day, a paedophile, rapist, kidnapper and killer at night. In addition to the nine victims, including Izuku, more crimes have been attributed to him over the years now that they have discovered the true pattern. The things they'd found on his hard drive would give him nightmares for years and Aizawa was glad for not being the one responsible for having to check it all out.

As he passed through the hideout, watching the horrible photos and videos of his boy, finding the dirty bed and the bookcase, he thought about the hell Izuku had lived there, in a prison disguised as a home, made just for him as he was watched for weeks on the streets by a monster lurking without anyone noticing.

It was there that someone almost completely broke one of the brightest people he had ever met. If not for Inko Midoriya, no one would have even gone after Izuku. He would just be someone who disappeared and would never be found, dead when a monster got tired of him, making room for one more victim.

Aizawa didn't like to think about that. To think that he would never have met Izuku, seen him with Mochi and his coloured lamps, hiding in his sleeping bag, laughing with his students or grabbing the sleeve of his shirt when walking with him on the street. Never having met Izuku seemed impossible and outrageous, even in the dire circumstances with which he had entered his life.

Aizawa was grateful that Inko had fought so hard for her son. Until her last breath, she kept fighting for him.

Now it was his turn to take over.

"Eraser, do you wanna take anything from this hell hole? "

Aizawa held up the burned-out notebook, number 13 written in the flawless handwriting Izuku had before his hands became too ruined to the point where he had to relearn how to write.

"Just this one."

.....................................................................................

One month later

"So he visits Izuku to take a nap with him?"

Aizawa shrugged, not understanding what the problem was. Nemuri rolled her eyes, seeing the two teenagers dozing on the couch. Izuku was sprawled on top of Todoroki, both of them serving as a pillow for the cats.

"I mean, it's cute, but it's not a hobby of normal teens, Shota."

Aizawa thought sleeping was a normal and safe pastime. And Izuku seemed calmer when the other boy was around. Even a month after the whole incident with Stain, Izuku had not yet fully returned to U.A. There were more bad days than good ones lately.

"I don't like seeing Izuku like this."

He looked at Nemuri who was looking at the two boys with a sad expression.

" I would even be content with him angry, breaking things. It would be normal, but he just accepts everything so quietly."

He understood her well. Izuku tried so hard that it was painful to watch. And as much as he tried to talk to him about it, the boy just acted like everything was fine.

"He still blames himself for what happened to his mother. He's too stubborn to change his mind, but he knows that if he says it I would tell him that it was not his fault, so he keeps quiet."

"So he just pretends to accept it?"

The two adults look at the boy on the couch, trapped in their own thoughts.

"He looks a lot like you."

Aizawa opened his mouth to deny but fell silent. Maybe that was the real problem, wasn't it?

"I don't think this is a good thing, Nemuri."

He felt an elbow in his belly.

"Shut up, you're wonderful. Things will work out. "

Things were going to work out, but as usually happens in life, it tends to get worse before it gets better.

Aizawa woke up that night to the sound of things breaking and objects floating. It was like going back to the beginning, just when he brought him home, and Aizawa was really afraid that he couldn't get him out of this, that they would be trapped in that cycle forever.

He cleaned it up and put the broken things in the trash bag, taking the time to catch some air and breathe. He felt as if he could suffocate at any moment.

What if he was doing everything wrong? If he was only making the situation worse? Aizawa never felt good about people, sometimes he didn't even feel good as a hero, which he thought was the only decent thing he ever did in his life.

If he were really good, he would have avoided so much.

If he were good he wouldn't have lost so many people.

Where was the hero Eraserhead when monsters took children and ruined them, destroyed them so deeply that they started to hate themselves?

He felt like spiralling into these thoughts, with no way out.

"Are you alright?"

He looked up, the trash bag still in hand and the lid of the trash bin open. He didn't know how long he had been like this, or how long Izuku had been there staring at him, hugging himself, even with a heavy coat over his pyjamas.

He sighed and threw the trash in place, trying to organize his thoughts. In the end, he chose to be honest.

"I think my head went to a bad place."

Izuku nodded as if that made perfect sense. And it really should do for him.

Aizawa sat on the front steps of the building and tapped on his side in invitation. Izuku hesitated only a few seconds before sitting beside him, leaning his body closer for warmth. Aizawa put his arm around the child's shoulders and stared out into the night, at the empty sidewalk, except for the cats passing by into the alleys.

"I'm sorry."

He looked down and saw Izuku fidgeting with his fingers, something he did whenever he got nervous.

"I know I'm being difficult."

"You did nothing wrong, Izuku."

"I know but-"

"You think you did."

The boy fell silent but did not deny it.

"Earlier Nemuri told me that you look like me."

Izuku frowned at him with a speculative expression.

"I also tend to blame myself for things that are beyond my control. In fact, I was doing it right now, looking at that dump. So I know that as much as I tell you the truth, that it was not your fault what happened, you will keep blaming yourself. Thinking about what you could have done differently. Am I right?

Izuku swallowed, his voice coming out in a choked tone.

"Yeah."

"But you have to know two things: First, what that monster did to you, nothing of that was your fault. I will never, under any circumstances, accept that you blame yourself for it. Second, your mother was a spectacular person, Izuku. She fought for you, and now you are here. That was all she wanted. She would do everything for you and she wouldn't blame you for what happened."

Aizawa saw the streetlights flicker and fired his quirk, feeling his eyes sting. Izuku's voice came out with the only true emotion he'd ever heard from him in a long time: anger.

"How can you know that? You don't-"

"Because you did exactly what she wanted you to do: you survived. You left there, walked for hours and found help. And then you got up, made friends, went to school, fell in love and is here, alive. You did everything right, Izuku. And if it's up to me, you'll keep doing it. How could your mother hate something that allowed you to stay alive?"

He watched him wipe his face, sniffling quietly, unsure of how to respond. But that's okay for him. Izuku's quirk now seemed controlled. He at least looked more alive now, less like a stringless doll.

After a long time he saw more tears leak from him, but this time he didn't wipe them away, looking at Aizawa in a way that broke his heart, his voice trembling and childlike.

"I miss her so much."

"I know."

"I... I don't want to let what happen to define who I am forever, but it's so hard. I don't want to hate my quirk, hate myself , but I don't know what to do. I think all the time that it would have been better if I didn't wake up, but I don't want to think like that anymore."

Aizawa let out his breath slowly. He never imagined how hard it would be to hear it coming out of a child's mouth, especially one he already considered his own.

"You are not well."

"No, I'm not."

"This is the first step to solving a problem. Admit that it exists, right?"

Izuku nodded quickly, rubbing his eyes in vain. Aizawa held his face in his hands, wiping his tears with his scarf carefully.

"It's good to know then that you're not alone, that you have help to go through this. I'm here, as well as Nemuri, Todoroki, and that blond idiot hero number one, who for some reason I'll never understand, you like so much."

Izuku smiled slightly and he felt victorious for this.

"Even my students, that little shits, and the strange creature who is Nedzu. All of them, here for you. I honestly think it was a bad deal to get so many weird people, but now, unfortunately, there is no return."

This time Izuku managed a quiet laugh and Aizawa's lip quivered, but he held his blank expression.

He felt Izuku lean back against him, both of them silent. He saw him frown, certainly analyzing the conversation and tried not to smile at this.

"Do you-"

Izuku paused and he waited patiently for him to arrange his thoughts. When he finally spoke his voice was quiet, almost a whisper.

"Do you think one day I'll stop going there? I close my eyes and always go back to that place. As if I could never really leave."

Aizawa closed his eyes and sighed.

"I wonder it sometimes too, when I return to my bad place. I can't tell you that won't happen again, Izuku, as much as I want it, but there's one thing I can guarantee you."

"What is it?"

"That when you go there, I'll bring you back. You will never be alone again."

He felt his arms around him, his head on his belly as he hugged him tightly. The muffled voice in his shirt came out in a wet but fervent whisper.

"Thank you, Shota. For everything. For not giving up on me."

The name made him smile slightly.

"Any time, Izuku."

The two went up after a few minutes. They made some tea and turned on the television in some stupid movie until they slept right there on the couch. The next morning when he got up, his neck was aching from his sleeping position. He saw him sitting on the living room floor, lifting Mochi with his quirk gently.

Trying.

And that was all he could ask for.

Aizawa was sure that they would be all right, then.

Final notes

- Izuku tells how his kidnapper had a mind control quirk, but this one didn't work on everyone. The greater the stubbornness of people the more easily the effects were broken. This happened to Izuku and also to Inko. Remember the man she said that she had seen? He tried to use his quirk on her so she wouldn't go after Izuku. 

-Izuku was held captive for a long time and eventually, his kidnapper brought Inko. Inko went out of mind control to help Izuku, but she couldn't fight him and was going to be killed. Izuku's quirk awoke to save Inko, but she was very close to him and was caught in the attack. His quirk killed her by accident. That was the trauma that made him forget.

-Aizawa learns that All Might and Naomasa always suspected that Inko was no longer alive after a conversation with Nighteye. All Might tells how he met Izuku before and that after the attack in which he saved Bakugou he went after Izuku to talk, but did not find him anymore, as he had already been taken by the abductor on his return home. He felt guilty and so did everything to find him and in the process he and Inko became friends.-Aizawa learns all about the kidnapper, how he had done this before with other kids and how he was a guy whom nothing was suspected.

-Aizawa helps Izuku start dealing with the trauma.

PS: Yes, Schrodinger's cat has always been Inko, that why in the cover it's green. Izuku didn't know if Inko was dead or alive, until he opened the 'box'.

Art from Clara, again!

Next time, Epilogue and we'll have a little extra chapter with Tokoyami, about Izuku's quirk.