I think it was already close to midnight. I didn't know what I was doing.

My head was heavy, the world was spinning. I think I stumbled, because I heard a loud crash. I couldn't see at all.  I couldn't even feel anything. I hate this feeling.

Everywhere was just one blur mess.

My throat felt terribly bitter, my lungs were burning, my head was in a complete wreck. I could feel the beads of perspiration, and I could feel the nauseous feeling going up my throat.

Then there came a blurry figure. I didn't know who that person was, but this person pulled me up. Unsteady, I almost lost my balance, and almost fell on this person.

This person was shorter than me, but I was leaning my entire weight on this person. I couldn't process anything. My head was too painful to care.

Then I heard words.

"Bill, Bill, Bill wake up! Get off the grass, let me help you up okay?" This person spoke.

Hearing a voice after all this turmoil I've been through made my head feel s little clearer.

Also, this person sounded so gentle, so kind and so heart warming. I wanted to hear more of her sweet melody.

---
(Hours back)

"And this is my living room," he opened his hands in an overly exaggerated fashion, once again showing off his slightly-drunken stupor.

It was only 7.30pm at night, and he was already over-the-top. I felt like knocking some sense into him.

"Do you love it?" He grinned, and I nodded my head trying to crack a smile.

"Good." He replied, before mumbling something else. I couldn't make out what he was saying, and I didn't bother to.

The sole purpose I came here was to 'socialise' more. Guess I should do that.

"Oh by the way, do you know where's Benjamin and the rest?" I asked, referring to my group of basketball mates.

He smirked, "They're in the kitchen."

"Uh okay sure thanks, I'm going off to them now is that okay?" I asked again awkwardly, now feeling more awkward as a girl started heading towards our direction. I knew she was heading for him, are they in a relationship?

Ignoring me, he went up to the girl as well.

Oh well.

I made my way to the kitchen. The living room reeked with alcohol. And I found out that there were too many people crowding in the living room, no matter how large the room was, it surely couldn't accommodate this much people. Everyone was dancing in their own world, with several people getting high in the corner, I didn't want to look.

I finally resorted to getting to the kitchen by the back door.

The kitchen wasn't as populated as the living room, I manage to make my way in, and was relieved when I saw the familiar group of faces.

I waved my hand at them, but only Louis caught my eye.

"Hey Bill!" He smiled, welcoming me warmly. That was only when the rest noted my presence.

"So what do you guys usually do on a party?" I asked, looking around aimlessly. This kitchen was nicely renovated, with cool white tiles, and plants hanging over the kitchen stoves, and bright white light entering the well-ventilated room.

"We just chill," he replied, making me smile a little. He becomes quite humorous after you get to know him. That was when Benjamin came into the conversation.

"Bill, do you want to know more people? I can help you introduce you to some of them," he offered.

It seemed like the first time he offered to help me. Cautiously I nodded, and as he walked out of the kitchen, I trailed behind quickly.

Outside, he met Bridgette and did the usual I guess, with the arms wrapped possessively around her, like a vice grip, like a python to a defenceless chicken.

"Let's go," he said to me, no emotion in his words. Sometimes I feel that he really detests me. For whatever reason, who knew.

Maybe I can patch things up today?

He motioned at me to go to the drinks table. There, there were drinks of many kinds, including the sophisticated kind with swirls coming out of the glasses.

I knew nothing about all this, Benjamin gave me a short stout cup of dark glistening liquid and I accepted it, although I didn't dare to take a sip.

For the following hour, it was quite mundane as we went around, shaking hands, laughing about things I don't find amusing and so on. I guess the pro side was that I got to know more people, at least I met one of my goals.

Now for goal number two.

It took really long before I could finally find just the perfect opportunity to face him one-on-one.

Benjamin was refilling his drinks, and his face was already a bit red.

"Benjamin?" I asked cautiously, wanting to determine from his tone his current mood.

"Yeah?" He replied, almost sounding weary.

I decided that was the perfect chance to finally ask. 

"I've been wondering, but what is it about me that you hate so much? Can you tell me, and from there I can change, I'm willing to change, let's confide in each other okay?"

I guess I didn't know who I was messing with.

Obviously he flared, and coldly he asked me to go away. My heart sank, I still don't understand what's with hiding his feelings.

But since he told me to go away, I should go. There must be some underlying reason as to why.

However, before I turned, he said something again.

"Wait."

I turned around, facing him.

"Why haven't you touched that drink I gave you? Are you rejecting me?"

"What? No!" I defended furiously, and he broke out in soft chuckles. 

"Then finish it. If you finish it, we will be friends. If not..."

I didn't want to drink this unknown substance. But if just drinking this small amount of liquid could patch up my relationship with him, that'd just be so easy.

With one brave gulp, I emptied the contents of my cup.

My gag reflexes were on fire and it took just every inch of my willpower to prevent myself from spitting out the awful liquid. My mouth felt like burning, my throat was on fire.

With one big gulp, I swallowed it.

A momentary wave of dizziness swept over me. I stumbled. My head felt cold, my hands were cold.

I regretted taking such a big gulp.

The throbbing in my veins were louder now, and it was getting dark.

It would only be later when I know that I had just swallowed a cup of heavy liquor in one gulp.

It would only be later when I realise how naïve I were.

I turned to face Benjamin with the empty cup. But before I could, my legs gave way and I collapsed.

---