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A home is no place to hide
______
Everyday, the same, she fights, to find her way, she breaks, she hides, she tries to pray, she wonders why, does anyone hear her when she cries?
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The ringing of an alarm clock startled me awake. I opened my eyes before wincing and turning it off. The pain screeched down my back to my skeleton.

'You whore... self absorbed nobody!'

The voice ringed in my head as a memory of last night. My father smashing things, throwing things. I was in the way, and when things are in his way, he will plow through you.

He raised his hand like a raising sun in the sky and he burned me with his heat and left marks on my body.

    I stood up and looked myself in the mirror that was on the door of my bedroom  I faced myself, a tall girl that isn't bad looking, but isn't the prettiest with marks all over her. I  have a body of an hourglass, like any girl would die for, but for me it is a curse as I get cat called and names thrown at me. "Pretty" girls don't have it the way people think. My fair skin had discoloration in areas. As I moved closer to see my complexion, I forced my eyes shut to muffle a scream in my throat and looked at myself.

There I saw a girl with her chestnut brown eyes glazed with emotion. Not puffy as they would be when I was little. I cried all the tears I had in my chest, my soul. I did looked sleep deprived. As if I haven't slept in days, in which I haven't.
My wavy auburn hair cupped my face as it is past my shoulders, tangled in a mess.

Here I am, like glass, in a million of peices and I need to pick it all up and put myself together.

The difference is that I don't think anyone sees my cracks or cracking. No one sees the pain. Is my mask made that well?

Maybe.

My dull room was filled with sunny sunshine from the one window in my room, the sunshine hit the exposed skin and gave me warmth on the inside.

I took a deep breath before getting new clothes and unpeeling the clothes I was wearing.

I slowly put on my clothes as I stared at myself in the mirror. The huge bruises on my side, my ribs, everywhere, luckily I pushed him off in time to run before he got to my legs and really break bones. Mesmerizing to know how easily to cover this. Like magic.

Finally, I was dressed in ripped shorts, that weren't originally ripped but my mother came at me, a over sized black shirt.

I brushed my hair gently, almost putting me back to sleep. The gentleness I never felt gives me a real sense of home. I know this isn't home. Far from it.

I applied a bit of foundation to cover the tiredness. The mask is to be put back on me once again.

I looked at my alarm clock and it states to me that it was time to go

To go to an escape in my drowning of words and people.

School.

I slipped on black ankle socks before slipping on black Converses.

I prayed to the God that I don't believe in, that I don't see my father at the breakfast table, the evil grin as he would hold the news paper with my mother on her phone, too busy to notice me.
I hoped.

'God, please. Fucking pretty please can they not be there? For once?'

I slipped on my bookbag with my I.D. before sneakily walking down the screeching carpeted rugs with every step I took.

I glance to my left, and not a single sign of my parents.

Parents if you want to call them, more like guardians, parents are people who want their children and actually love them enough to feed them well and cares about their birthday.

I exhaled a relieved breath.

'Thank you, God, really. Maybe your not even real, maybe I'm just talkin to myself. Maybe it was luck or probablity of a 50/50 chance. Thank whoever then'

I shook my head to stop the over thinking and grabbed the metal knob. I turned it with ease, knowing my wasted parents wouldn't care to lock it. The sunlight hit my face as the outside had greeted me and my nostrils with nature.

Then I was off.

One foot in front of the other, carrying me to my school that was only a few blocks away.

That's probably the only thing I could do right.