A/N:
Date 8-22-17

Hey everyone! Sorry about this chapter being so late. I haven't been able to write a lot lately and I have school work, but I'll try harder to write more.

Here's an extra long chapter :)

And the pic above is some lyrics to an amazing song

Word Count: 3050

------------------------------------------------

Chapter 3: Will Power and Mind Control

After searching the whole town, even the places I used to go to be alone, I didn't find Jake. I even used my super speed when I could do so without being detected by anyone, but I still found nothing. So I decided to try something new. Something very new.

I snuck back into my house through my window. I was surprised by how high I could jump with a running start, although I should've realized that all the vampire power running through me would give me a boost.

I snuck into Jake's room to grab something of his. I'd heard that some vampires could track people through smell if they were close to that person, so I thought I'd give it a try. I wasn't exactly close to Jake, but he's my brother. That had to count for something.

I grabbed one of Jake's shirts from off the floor near his laundry basket. I stared at the shirt indecisively for a moment, realizing how weird it was that I was about to smell my brother's shirt. But I had to do it to find Jake.

I lifted the shirt up to my nose to get a better scent as I thought about using my heightened senses. It's not like I could instantly smell everything around me. I had to close that sense off because it could be overwhelming.

Which is why I winced when I caught a whiff of not just the shirt, but the whole room. It didn't smell extremely bad, but that many smells didn't mix well together.

I dropped the shirt back to its original place and hurried out of the room via the window, escaping the house without being noticed. It had only been around an hour and a half since I left the first time, so I had enough time to go searching again. But the second time, I'd be tracking Jake by scent. If it worked.

I took in a deep breath and easily caught Jake's scent. I let out a small relieved laugh because I hadn't believed that it would work. Unfortunately, it was more complicated than just following my nose.

The scent I caught led me to the house because Jake spent the most time there, so his scent was stronger near the house. I had to concentrate on the scents outside of the house, and there were plenty of those to go around.

I moved even further from the house to try a different tactic. After I distanced myself several feet away, I finally caught Jake's most current trail. Then down the sidewalk I went.

I followed Jake's scent all the way through town until I got to the furthest bus stop away from our house. He must've gotten on the bus at that point because his scent became weaker and harder to follow. But I had to try.

By then, Jake's scent was so weak that I kept getting sidetracked by other smells. His kept getting overwhelmed, then I had to stand in one place and focus all of my heightened senses to find the trail again. To sum it up, it was exhausting.

The trail did lead me somewhere, just not to Jake's immediate location. I was at the edge of town and Jake's scent just kept going, but I knew I couldn't. At least, not today because my dad said to be home in a few hours and it had been just about that time since I left the house. I could always search later today or tomorrow. Or Jake might come home on his own.

~*~

The days started blurring together at some point. Every day my dad ignored me, my mom tried taking care of me, Lucy constantly worried about me, and I looked for Jake for hours.

I kept getting farther and farther away from our house until I was two towns away. I would super speed to where I left off the day before, but the trail got weaker every day.

Three days after I arrived I was still looking for Jake. The police hadn't found anything yet. They even put out alerts to nearby cities. The police informed my distraught mother that the best thing to do would be to sit and wait for Jake to be found or for him to come home.

But I promised that I would look for him every day until he was found. So that's what I did.

On my way home that third day back, I passed more than a few people.

The streets were hardly empty at this time, full of bustling people. It was around dinner time, which meant rush hour at 5pm. I always made it home by the time my mom finished cooking dinner, and that night was no exception.

It was almost like old times when I wasn't fighting bloodlust. Sure, back then I did want to hunt and kill vampires, but that wasn't bloodlust like what I have to struggle with these days.

Just like before, I didn't talk much with my family and I liked to take walks before dinner. But lately I've been even more on edge. Storm or his minions could jump out at any moment.

They could've followed me home, making it my fault for endangering my family. Especially Lucy.

I assumed that Storm didn't know where Ash lived, but he could've known and was just waiting for me to lead him to my house. It was inevitable. I'm a teenage girl who still needs her family, especially in a crisis like this. My life was altered forever, literally, when I was turned into a vampire.

Thinking of Ash brought my train of thought to the guilty station. Ash probably thinks I left because he was dangerous. Because of the way his personality flipped and he changed into someone else, attacking me and Zane. I forgave Ash though and I told him that.

But it's true what people say: No one can accept forgiveness from others until they forgive themself.

Someone bumped into me as I was stuck in the past, knocking me back a step and into reality. I realized I hadn't been breathing, so on instinct, I inhaled deeply.

I could suddenly smell everything around me. Sound exploded in my ears as my breath hitched in a panic. My head whipped around to see if anyone else heard anything, but it was only me who had a roaring river in my head.

A woman walking near me glanced at me for a moment before faltering and staring openly at me with concern. I could tell by her expression that my eyes had widened and I looked as panicked as I felt inside.

I thought maybe the woman would ask if I was alright while I was trying to block out the sound, but she glanced away and kept going silently.

It was as if time slowed down suddenly. The woman stepped forward, as close to me as she was going to get, which was seemingly enough. A fruity scent entered my nose and I reached out for the source, grabbing the woman's arm.

Her eyes widened from my tight grip as she opened her mouth to undoubtedly scream. I could hear her heart racing from my cold touch.

"Sorry." I said quickly as I let go of her, spouting out a lie to save myself from that horribly embarrassing situation. "You look familiar. Do I know you?"

"Um... no. I don't think so." The woman replied with a nervous chuckle.

I gave her a small smile as she went happily on her way, but I on the other hand was rattled. I couldn't believe that I'd freaked out so badly that I attacked that woman. The worst part was, I could still smell her blood and hear her heartbeat slowing.

I could make it keep slowing down, drain her until her heart stopped all together.

I forced myself to walk away, as far as I could get with the nauseous feeling in my stomach and the overwhelming feeling of being suddenly claustrophobic.

I didn't understand what was going on. How could I lose control so quickly like that? How could I be fine for days with no urges to drink from someone, then today I almost hurt a total stranger? I didn't drink any blood yet today, but I was feeling okay before I left the house a few hours ago.

Maybe it was because that woman was a stranger. Maybe I didn't want to hurt my family, but it would be okay if I didn't know the person I attacked. Maybe I was turning into the sick monster that Ash told me I'd become. I should've listened to his warnings.

~*~

"Dinner's ready!" My mom called as she heard the front door close from my entry.

"I'm not hungry!" I answered as I rushed upstairs to my bedroom. Just as I closed my door I heard Lucy exit her room from downstairs. I was glad that she didn't see me in a rush like that.

I grabbed my backpack from where I hid it in my closet earlier. Ripping at the zipper to get my bag open, I dug around until I found a water bottle. The smell emitting from the bottle was intoxicating, even though it wasn't open yet.

Seeing the blood moving in the bottle made me more thirsty, if that it was even possible. My throat ached and my stomach felt empty. It was strange how my stomach no longer growled.

A sort of fear set in when I saw the other bottles in my bag. They were all empty.

Grabbing ahold of my bag in a panic, I was about to dump the contents of my bag on the floor to search for more blood when I heard a knock on the door. "Alicia?" My mom called to me as she started to open the door without waiting for an answer.

Using super speed, I shoved the blood filled water bottle into my backpack and slid it under the bed out of sight before my mom had a chance to see me in that unexplainable situation.

"I said dinner's ready." My mom repeated firmly.

"And I said I'm not hungry." I replied, trying to keep my expression neutral while I panicked, wondering if she saw anything.

My mom sighed in frustration, obviously hoping I had a different answer to give her. "I just want to sit down and eat as a family."

"Dad doesn't eat with us anyway." I argued before I thought it through. I wanted to slap a hand over my mouth for saying something so stupidly insensitive to my dejected mother. What kind of daughter was I?

"He is tonight." My mom replied fiercely. "We all are. You've been distant since you came home. I don't know what happened to you, but that's why I can tell you to get over it." My mom said, her face getting more red with every scornful word.

"So I need you to come downstairs and eat a meal with your family. It's the least you can do." My mom continued on with no remorse as my jaw dropped. Then she turned sharply on her heel and walked away, leaving me sitting alone, feeling awful about how I've treated my family.

My mom was right about it all. I had been distant. I've always been distant, but it's worse when I have to avoid everyone because I'm afraid they'll ask questions. She was also right about how she doesn't know what happened to me and she couldn't possibly understand. And because of that, I did kind of owe my mom a simple family dinner.

So downstairs I went, sitting down at our dining table that's meant for six people. There was always one chair that sat empty at our occasional family dinners, but there was a second one that everyone stared at uncomfortably.

My dad sat at the end of the rectangular table while my mom sat at the other end. Lucy sat to the left of our mom and I sat to the right of her so I was across from Lucy.

I stared down at my plate, already feeling a bit queasy. It definitely didn't help that steak was the food on the menu. That, along with mashed potatoes and baby carrots. If I was able to eat food it would be delicious.

A pair of eyes triggered my heightened senses on instinct, causing me to feel that stare and glance up to see who it was. My mom was giving me a strained smile, casting her gaze to my plate to signal that I should dig in. The dining room was too quiet, all eyes suddenly on me.

I cut into my steak with a fork and a knife, watching as I revealed the partially red meat inside. I closed my eyes, bringing the piece of steak up to my mouth quickly so I didn't have time to reconsider.

Immediately my gag reflex reacted, but I chewed and forced the food down. I wondered why it was so hard to eat at home. On my date with Zane I wasn't sick like that. It had to be because I hadn't been drinking as much blood lately. Actually, I hadn't drank any blood before dinner like I'd meant to.

As soon as the steak hit my stomach I felt worse, but I continued to eat. My mom seemed genuinely happy that I wasn't starving myself.

But while she was happy, I was not. Every bite of steak messed with my whole body. My head was pounding and I was full blown nauseous. But the worst part was that my heightened senses kicked in again.

I swallowed another piece of steak, following it up with a spoonful of mashed potatoes that didn't help any. My nose was catching every smell and my ears were picking up on everyone's heartbeat.

I couldn't believe that my second biggest fear was happening. My first biggest fear was that Storm would kill or use my family and it would be my fault. And that might've already happened with Jake.

I wanted to release the pressure in my head by screaming or throwing something, but my mom was already worried about me. She'd certainly think I belonged in the loony bin if I stood up and started yelling.

But soon after I made that reasoning, it flew out of my head and it became hard to care who saw what.

My eyes flared red as I glared at my plate, my grip on my fork and knife tightening until my knuckles paled further than their recent vampire white. I closed my eyes briefly, imagining them turning light blue again before opening my eyes.

My vision began to blur as I tried to focus my eyes on my mashed potatoes. The food flickered in and out of my vision sporadically. I held my breath to keep from smelling the fruity scent of my family's blood, but it didn't help. It was as if the smell was burned into my brain from the moment I inhaled it.

Pain shot through my head as I forced the smell of blood away so I wouldn't be tempted. I grabbed my head with my hands as a groan of pain accidentally escaped my mouth. I was suddenly on the verge of throwing up my half eaten dinner.

"Alicia?" I heard my mom say my name. My head shot up and my gaze met hers as I inhaled deeply, losing control. She gasped but I didn't stop to contemplate if my red eyes were visible or not. I didn't care anymore. I was about to let go and sink my teeth into someone. But it's my mother, how could I hurt her?

"Alicia." My dad said in an annoyed voice. I could hear his heart beating from my seat across the table. His heart rate was steady, which meant he wasn't worried about me. The thought angered me, making it even harder to bare the pain and control myself.

My vision went blurry again as I braced myself with the table, attempting to stand but ultimately falling back on to my seat. "Alicia?" My mom called worriedly.

I responded by vomiting all over the table, causing my mom to yell and stand to help me. With the food out of my system, I thought I'd feel better. But that wasn't the case.

My head spun as I saw the world in broken pieces. Lucy was wide eyed and reaching a hand out to grab my arm, my mom was rushing over to me, and my dad was frowning in confusion. He never was the most helpful when any of his kids were sick. I guessed this qualified as sick.

I managed to make my heavy limbs obey me and I yanked my arm out of Lucy's path. "Alicia! Are you okay?" Lucy asked in her soft caring voice as she swam in my vision. I tried to stand for the second time, but I had the urge to attack my mom who was reaching for me.

I shoved my mom's arm away with a snarl so she wouldn't touch me, but that little contact sharpened my need to hunt, allowing the monster within me to shove through my consciousness.

I cried out and stumbled backwards, knocking over my chair as I tried to fight to keep my humanity intact.

"Alicia! What's happening? Pete! Do something!" I heard my mom shouting in panic.

Then Lucy tried to communicate with me via my head, which was a terrible idea. "Alicia, what's wrong?"

I shoved the thought out of my head forcefully, trying to stay myself. I barely registered Lucy flinching and taking a step back.

I was sure as my own name that I was about to lose control, so I did the only thing I could to stop the overwhelming dark shadow in my mind that controlled my vampire side.

"Don't do it. Don't do it. Don't. Do. It."

The world slipped as my mind shut off and I crumpled to the ground in an unconscious heap in front of my hysterical mother.