"Don't believe anything you hear; only half of what you see." —Brother C

Esperanza Ciela

What was the scariest thing about today wasn't finding out that my friend was gone, or riding around with a kind and half-blind stranger; no, it was the fact that Mason drove better than Guinevere. The library wasn't five minutes away but even with a short red-light delay we about died maybe a dozen times. Or... that's what it felt like anyways.

I was holding onto the door so tightly that my bad hand started to hurt. Adding the fact that Guinevere wasn't even fazed by her driving made me even more worried. Once we arrived at the library I was out of the little LeSabre as fast as acceptably possible. Having no intent of offending her I forced a smile onto my face and thanked Guinevere for the ride.

"So, what did you need a computer for?" She asked as we walked into a glass side door.

"Job applications." I answered, tucking some stray hair behind my ear.

The tile floor and walls were a dull white as we passed doors and offices. Everything was quiet until we passed a room where they seemed to be having a meeting. Seems like this was the visitor center, we passed by a lone bookshelf in the hall with brochures and phone books and came to the door with the sign saying 'Public Library'. Stepping inside, we bumped into another member of William's church. How could I tell? The older woman's snow white hair was put up and she was wearing a blue dress. That and Guinevere greeted with a library whisper, "Hello Sister Lynn!"

The woman waved and resumed her responsibilities behind the check out desk. Passing the children's books and the main shelves we went to the computers in the center of the library. It wasn't long with Guinevere's help until I was filling out an application.

Quickly becoming bored with the monotonous task of answering the same questions about three or more different times I looked around the library. The magazines were across from me and the movies were behind me. I should probably grab some before heading out but... there's something different about KK, the girls and William. I had the sinking feeling that KK didn't have a TV, was she poor? Does she have one in her bedroom?

I glanced over at Guinevere as she perused through the audiobooks. Pretty much all the army guys I knew would say that Guinevere was thicc, Kayla was a tad slimmer, and I was shorter. Wait why was I comparing myself to her? Sometimes I wished that I was a bit taller but I turned out okay. Dori was like a little flat chested anime girl but was cute, had a personality it seemed, and was a dainty thing with a smile. Come to think of it, they all didn't seem like threats.

Like Mason gave me a vibe right away but turned out nice. I wrestled guys twice my weight; these girls? If they tried to threaten me I could probably kill them with my own hands. Not that I'm Rambo or the Lone Ranger or something but these girls scream 'hella sheltered'. Laughing at my own morbid train of thought I got onto the last few parts of the application. Finishing up I popped my neck and pulled out my phone from my pocket to check if my parents called. I don't remember my phone ringing but I missed a call.

Seeing the name of the caller made my gaze chill about twenty degrees. The pit in my stomach threatened to open; or was it always open? A vacuum drinking everything? I need to change his name to 'Ex' but my phone still read 'Bae🥰'. If I recall correctly, I was trying not to die in Guinevere's car when he called. Before I could change my mind I swiped the message and my phone called him back. On maybe the fifth ring he picked up.

"This better be hella good."

"Esperanza! You called!"

"Yeah, yeah, keep your crumby shirt on-"

"Girl! Where have you been?! You deleted your Facebook and Twitter. I even went back to the old-old school and checked our old MySpace accounts and you deleted that to!"

"Desperate much?" I said coldly. "I didn't even delete my MySpace, that was probably age."

"Doesn't matter," his voice was pleading, "girl-babe, where are you?"

A huff of a laugh got caught in my throat and my voice was clipped as I answered, twiddling some of my hair on one finger, "On the other side."

"Babe, don't play with me like that."

"I'm not playing with you, I already took up panhandling for you. I loved you but I'm not going to LA, San Diego or The City to get money on the red light district. I told you I was moving."

Anger began to simmer. What did he think? Did he think that I was one of those chicks that had twenty 'little-breakups' and thirty 'timeouts' before I was sick of it? If I say I'm done it's-D.O.N.E- done.

"What-?! This again?! Babe I never asked you to do that! I never ever would have asked you to do that! We were doing fine-"

"We. Were. Homeless. And you weren't making ends meet." I deadpanned. Anger flared into my voice and I said, "And what we did together was a lot like it. Someone just 'HAD' to be a part of The Industry. They couldn't work at the Silicon Valley, or landscape with my dad, or move to get a home. I'm not playing. We're done."

He stammered and I added, "Hook up with a co-worker. You know, an actor, like you and stop pretending that you were serious." My voice was a whisper at this point. "It was nice hearing from you one last time."

I was so caught up in the conversation that I absolutely missed the 'no phones' sign right next to my head. Eyes wide I glanced towards the check out table and caught that old lady giving me the most hilarious scowl I had ever seen. Choking on a laugh I finished saying, "I'm in a library, I'm not even supposed to be talking right now. I gotta let you go... in more ways than one."

"Esperan-"

Click.

I mimed an apology to the librarian and spied Guinevere in the corner reading the same summary of the audiobook in her hands since she came in. Hmm, nosy, hopefully that nose doesn't 'run n' tell'. Clearing my throat I stood up.

"I'm done Guinevere."

"You were gonna go to church, right?"

I sighed, Nike was one of the most boring cities in Texas and Adnah didn't have much to do. Seemed to me like I didn't have much of a choice. At least in California I could hit the beach, watch the ocean... and the surfers. The last time I had time for anything was when I was a teenager before I went to the army.

"Sure, are we just going to stand around and sing Kumbaya?"

"Um," she clammed up while she thought of a reply, "you'll see."

I frowned. That didn't sound good.

"You guys are Catholic or something right?"

Guinevere ungracefully snorted when she tried to contain a laugh. "We're Pentecostal, now come on. We'll talk outside."

"Please tell me there's no Koolaid involved."

I've heard about that Jonestown massacre in the nineties. Around nine-hundred people committed suicide or something crazy like that with spiked Koolaid. Or was that the eighties or seventies? I think it was the seventies.

Guinevere couldn't help it anymore and laughed so loud I thought we were going to get in trouble with the librarian again.

"Shut up!" I whispered as we stepped into the hall.

"No," she heaved, "no Koolaid."

"How long is it?" My foot dragged on the tile and squeaked on accident as I walked.

"The service? Depends."

"What do you mean 'depends'?"

She shrugged nervously. "Depends."

I arched a brow as we entered the Near-Deathmobile Nine-Thousand. Something about Guinevere was rather... obtuse. She was a little giddy, obnoxious at times and oblivious to subtle things in life sometimes. Then I remembered that dirty look she gave me, was she paranoid? Flippant? Loopy? I don't know... maybe William will know more.

A/N: 'The City' is Northern Cali slang for San Francisco and The Industry is Cali slang for the ever prominent film industry in Hollywood.