***

Spending Christmas Eve on my own was something that I had become accustomed to since losing my parents five years ago, yet tonight there was no denying the sense of loneliness. Maybe it was the fact that I expected to spend the holiday with the girls but the tensions still ran high between Ivy and Harley. It had been over a week since Ivy left to the Amazons for some environmental mission and Selina seemed to be getting deeper and deeper in her search for the truth. But it was quickly becoming clear to me that the four of us seemed to thrive on our own. Well, expect for Harley who needed others to be witnesses to her unusual antics and chaos.

I was sitting alone in my room desperate to finish the last of Harley's new suit after having put it aside for so many days in order to help Selina. My fingers were numb from hours in front of the sewing machine wan't every detail to be perfect.

If it wasn't for the slight rustle of fabric I wouldn't have noticed her arrive but after being by Selina's side for so many months I knew what to look out for. The fact that she taught me everything she knew and for that reason alone I knew most of her tactics. "Selina."

"Did you have plans for tomorrow evening?" Selina asked as I heard her approach from somewhere in the room.

"No. Why?" I questioned finally looking up from my work to meet Selina's mysterious eyes. I knew that she wanted something, but she was still such a difficult person to read that it was almost impossible to know what her intentions were. Without a word Selina handed me an envelope that was almost too beautiful to belong in Gotham. Already feeling cautious I slowly pulled the invitation out of the envelop only to find that it was an invitation for Christmas diner at Wayne Manor. "And you're going to go?"

"We are. Yes." Selina replied as she leaned against my dresser looking studying my stunned expression. She met my eyes as she tapped on the down at the invitation my hands where my name was also printed.  "You were invited too."

I pressed my lips together to prevent myself from laughing. The thought of stepping a foot inside of Wayne Manor was so incredibly absurd that I couldn't imagine that Selina would actually consider not only accepting the invitation but expecting me to go along with her. "You must be joking."

Selina frowned as she looked down at me. "If you're looking for a joke go to Harley."

Looking back down at the invitation I shook my head in disbelief knowing that is was impossible that Bruce would have sent Selina this. The fact the Selina seemed to be seriously considering going was also very concerning. "Bruce couldn't have sent this. It must have been Alfred."

"Of course it was Alfred."

I truly felt speechless for a moment as I looked up at her realizing that no matter how long or little I've known her I would never really understand her. Selina was a mystery so maybe that was why Bruce seemed so drawn to her. "And you still want to go?"

"I want to know what he knows." She stated simply as if I should have already known the answer.

"It's on Christmas." I reminded her knowing that even if she attended this dinner that Bruce would still be consumed in try to find this killer that has had the entire city on edge. One killing on halloween and another on Thanksgiving there was a clear pattern to these killings.  "If the killer follows his usual pattern, there is certainly going to be another body."

"Exactly why we have to go." Selina stated firmly as we have also been on the search for this holiday killer. Whoever they are they have only been targeting members of the Falcone crime family and Selina was worried that Carmine Falcone would be next. Not that she particularly cared for the man but she wanted to know if he really was her father before he met any well deserved death at the hand of the city's newest crazed killer. "I'm assuming you don't want to go."

"I'd rather not ruin my Christmas. No." I replied immediately knowing that whatever encounter I would have with Dick would end terribly.

Selina rested a comforting hand on my should as she stood. "Wear the red one. Just my suggestion."

Looking down at the red and black leather in front of me I sighed thinking about how terribly wrong this dinner would be. Truthfully I couldn't imagine Bruce and Dick sitting down and having a formal Christmas dinner, but it wasn't difficult to imagine that Alfred could very well force the two of them to do something slightly normal.

***

There was no ignoring my nerves as we walked up the steps leading up to the lavish doors looming up ahead. The red dress that I wore fit the occasion compared to Selina's usual black wardrobe. Even if I was wearing a festive red, Selina's tight fitting black dress matched my mood better. After an entire night of contemplation I decided to attended the Wayne Christmas dinner with Selina against my best judgment with the knowledge that it was going to end in disaster. 

"I don't know if I want to laugh or be angry at this situation you've placed me in." I muttered under my breath as we stood in front of the monstrous wood doors of Wayne Manor. Some part of me expected the place to be lavishly decorated for in Christmas decorations, but the outside was bare which really shouldn't have been a surprise.

Selina had been unusually silent through our trip here, leaving me to complain on my own. Her eye tore away from the door to meet my eyes with an expression I didn't recognize shinning in them. "Both would be understandable reactions."

"You're nervous?" I questioned though it was more of a statement as I finally recognized the look in her eyes. It was impossible for me to recognize it before because I had never seen Selina nervous or unsure of herself. Maybe Brice had a greater influence on her than I initially thought.

Selina's mask of confidence returned in an instant, and it was as if she never felt unsure in the first place. She never spoke of her relationship with Bruce, but judging from her previous reaction I could only assume that their relationship was still strained and from my knowledge Bruce was still dating that journalist Vikki Vale. "Hardly."

Before I could reply the large doors opened revealing a formally dressed Alfred who seemed oddly satisfied with himself. "Miss Kyle. Miss Freemont. Welcome, I'm glad to see you've accepted our invitation."

I smiled at the butler unsure of what game he seemed to be playing by planning all of this. Considering the difficult situation we're all currently in it wasn't impossible to assume that Bruce and Dick have no idea that Selina and I were invited to dinner. "You mean your invitation Alfred?"

"Indeed." He replied as he helped Selena and I out of our coats once we were inside. My uncertainty returned as I looked around that mansion realized nothing at all had changed, though I probably shouldn't have expected it too. Yet, it stuck me because it was almost like I had never left. 

When I turned back to Alfred I realized that Selina was no longer standing beside me, and I could only wonder how long I was standing here or how long she had slipped away. Alfred seemed unfazed by the fact that Selina had disappeared somewhere in this ridiculously large mansion. "Please make yourself at home. Miss Kyle already has."

He gave me a simply nod of acknowledgment before stepping away and heading towards the kitchens. Now that I was alone I was overcome with curiosity and considered heading to my old room. Wondering if it had been stripped of all signs that I had once occupied it, but I was no fool. There was no point in getting more emotionally invested than I already was by going upstairs.

Instead I headed to the library another place in the mansion that held so many memories. As I stepped inside I was enveloped by warmth coming from the large fireplace, once again bringing back memories when I used to spend the days her sketching whenever Dick was away. 

Not knowing when dinner would begin I started browsing all the books shelved neatly on the shelves. As the minutes slipped away I wondered if I could too. With Selina missing it would be so easy to simply leave, I could only keep up this uncaring facade for so long and I feared that I would crack during dinner. 

"What are you doing here?" A familiar voice questioned, I had expected this and yet I found that my heart was beginning to beat rapidly at the sound of his voice.

I turned to meet Dick's understandably furious eyes. Only a couple of months ago her was asking me to come back and I ridiculed him for it. Now I felt like the fool for being here at all. And although I felt that ridicule I hide it behind a smile as I took a step closer to him. "Merry Christmas to you too."

He studied me for a moment the angry look in his eyes unchanging. Entering the room it was clear that he seemed incredibly tense. Dick was already dressing for dinner in a formal suit, which clearly was the only factor in his appearance that he seemed to have put any thought into. His hair was getting longer and some strands were reaching his eyes. Even with his unkept hair he still seemed to take my breath away as I was overcome with longing. "You shouldn't be here."

"So does that mean you don't miss me?" I questioned as I closed the space between us as I reached out to adjust his tie. Not that it needed to be fixed, even I couldn't deny that it was a stupid excuse to be closer to him. "I find that very hard to believe."

Dick shook his head as he took a painful step away from me. "I don't want to play this game anymore"

Even though his words did hurt some part of me was relieved. He needed to hate me to make all of this easier, to make it more clear that we were both on different sides. "Good."

With that relief came the need to put as much distance between me and Dick as possible. We simply couldn't be in a room alone together. I moved to walk past him, but as I did he took a hold of my wrist stopping me before I reached the door. Turning to face him I already knew the direction this was going and was filled with mixed emotions.

Looking into his tormented eyes I felt my guard slip for just a moment before his lips came crashing down on mine. My reaction was immediate as I kissed him back ignoring all reason. Dick pulled me closer with one hand as the other got lost in my hair. This kiss was different from the ones they shared in July during Falcone's part, because even though there was anger in Dick's eyes only moments before there were no traces of that anger now.

In fact the kiss was gentle and as we deepened the kiss it was almost like time had stopped. Like everything that had happened since I left months ago never happened and that nothing else existed except for us. It really did feel like there was some invisible fore that seemed intent on bringing them together like this.

Slowly Dick pulled away, the hand that was lost in my hair moving down to my face where his thumb gently brushed my cheek. His skin felt like it burned against mine, because it surpassingly hurt that we were back in reality. It felt like I was holding my breath as he looked into my eyes before shaking his head and taking a step back. "I don't know why I keep doing that."

I didn't say anything as I let him walk out of the room, ignoring the feeling that I should go after him. Tears stung at the corner of my eyes, but I refused to let them free. It was unbelievable how overcome with emotion I was now, because the kiss didn't compare to any of the ones that came before.

What I felt now felt much stronger than what I felt for Dick when we really were together. I knew I loved him then but this felt different and much more intense in a way that I couldn't even begin to explain.

The sound of a small bell came from the dinning room.

Dinner was ready, but I wasn't ready to face Dick again. Especially after what just happened and the storm of emotions building up inside of me. 

Like expected dinner was going horribly as we all ate in silence, though in reality no one at the table was really eating. We were mostly picking at our food as the tension between the four of us seemed to swell, and I could only wonder what Alfred's goal in all of this was. If it was to torture us, he had definitely accomplished what he had set out to do. 

I could feel Dick's eyes on me and I had to fight the urge to not turn to him. Selina and Bruce were seated stiffly across from each other too, though they seemed to be able to fake their indifference more easily. 

When I finally met Dick's eyes from across the dining table he looked away, but I didn't miss the mix of anger and sadness in his eyes. It was almost torture being unsure which emotions was more prominent but from how fighting he was gripping his fork that it was turning his knuckles white it was clear that his anger and possible hatred were the strongest.

A couple seconds ticked by before Dick abruptly stood before striding out of the room not looking behind him. Surprisingly I felt a spike of irritation and anger at Selina as I met her eyes, this whole situation could have been easily avoided. In fact I felt so resentful of her that I couldn't even look at her as I also stood leaving the dinning room.

As  stepped out into the large entrance hall Alfred was just stepping down the large staircase a surprisingly sad expression on his face. Unusual only because Alfred always seemed so collected. "Leaving so soon?" 

"It's for the best." I replied as I headed towards the coat rack by the door. 

"You won't stay for desert?" Alfred questioned as he helped me into my coat before opening one of the large double doors. It was difficult not to immediately flee as I wanted to put as much distance between me and this house as soon as possible, but I wanted to hold onto as much dignity as possible. 

I offered the older butler a soft smile as I stepped though the door into the cold winter air."I know when I'm not wanted. Merry Christmas Alfred."

Without any hesitation I began my descent down the multiple stone steps. They were covered in snow and there was something deeply melancholic about that fact as I realized that in the end I would spend Christmas alone. 

"I believe it's the opposite Miss Freemont."

I froze at the bottom of the stairs turning slowly to meet Alfreds eyes. He was a difficult man to read, and there was no reading into his natural expression. But his words suggested that there was so much that I didn't understand. "What?"

"Simply that you are reading the situation incorrectly. Odd how history tends to repeat itself." He stated firmly as he looked down at her, his expression unchanging. Oddly I felt my heart begin to beat rapidly in my chest desperately wanting to understand what he meant by history repeating itself. "Merry Christmas."

He closed the large doors behind him leaving my stunned in the bitter cold, still confused by his words. Brushing them aside I headed down the driveway towards the large iron gates deep in thought, scolding myself for not following my instinct and refusing to come. In the end I felt exactly like how I expected I would.

Confused and tormented.

But I refused to feel this way anymore. There were solutions to end my loneliness and I wasn't about to spend that rest of this day alone. 

***

A/N: Is it too early for a Christmas chapter? .....Maybe. But here it is anyway. If you thought that because Dick and Chey are together in the present timeline there wasn't going to be anymore angst you would be wrong. Flashback Chey and Dick are going to be very angsty. These next couple of chapters are going to be very sexy it wasn't planned it just happened. But it's going to be my holiday gift for you all, so you get to decide just how sexy we're going to go. So smut or no smut? Your choice and I will deliver.