Chapter 1: Run Away

When you are already lost, choosing your path is the hardest thing to do. In finding the right way, you can lose not just your sanity but also your soul.

I sighed as I got out of his office. He is really an asshole. I can't last a minute with him. His vanity is irritating the hell out of me.

Unconsciously, I went inside the Function Hall. The audition is now starting. I suddenly forgot about it. I want to join the Music Club so I decided to audition but, Mom knew it and I know that I don't have a choice but to follow her biddings.

Wala akong magawa kundi ang sundin siya. I want to please her to prove that my love for her is genuine and strong. Na kahit nasasaktan ako, pinipili kong magpatawad kasi mahal ko.

Life is full of choices. It is up to you if you will choose what your heart desires or settle for what you think is right and just.

The room is filled with aspiring musicians from different courses. They are sitting alphabetically behind the juries. A girl with long brown hair and a big ribbon is singing in the front. Her number says 'fifty-six'. I just stared at her for a few minutes and when she finished the song I clapped really hard. She is incredible! I like her voice. Because I am the only one who clapped, everyone's eyes stared at me as if I did something wrong. I just shrugged and went out of that place.

Some people were born with luck. Napagtanto ko ring natural na sa taong maghanap ng wala siya na nasa iba at sa huli ay mauuwi sa pagkainggit. Kapag hindi tayo kumpleto, hahanapin natin ang kulang at hihilinging mapunta sa atin iyon. Natural na sa tao iyon, ang hindi makuntento.

Kagaya ko, wala akong kontrol sa buhay ko at nakikita ko iyon sa ilang taong nakakasalamuha ko. They have the chance to live— wholly. With no limitations. No regrets. Purely existing.

Mamayang 10 o'clock pa talaga ang first class ko. Maaga lang akong pumasok ngayon dahil sa Student Council. I am looking for a good area to rest when my feet brought me in the garden. Hmm, not bad.

I sat under the tree and put my guitar on my lap. I love music. It's my way of escaping reality. I closed my eyes and started to strum.

~I stare at my reflection in the mirror
Why am I doing this to myself
Losing my mind on a tiny error
I nearly left the real me on the shelf~

I am a trophy daughter. My achievements define me. Everyone expects me to be great. To land among the stars. But, what can I do? My existence is completely controlled. I am chained. Alam mo 'yong pakiramdam na patay ka na kahit humihinga ka pa naman? Gano'n. Nakakasakal.

~Don't lose who you are
In the blur of the stars
Seeing is deceiving, dreaming is
believing
It's okay not to be okay~

Sometimes, people tend to forget what kind of person they really are. Power and money made them blind. Fame and achievements made them greedy. Gusto kong maranasan minsan sa buhay na ito na mahawakan ang tunay na 'ako'. Masilayan ko man lang ang mundo gamit ang mga matang hindi tinatakpan ng kung sinuman.

"Nice voice..." I stopped singing and glanced at my side. There is a guy in a black hoodie. He has this oozing aura that made me speechless. His deep brown eyes illuminated my shocked expression.

"T-thanks," I answered.

Tinitigan ko siya. I'm seriously checking him out but the hell I care! His clean-cut really suits his bad boy look. With his aristocrat features, he can swoon anyone, with no sweat. That sharp jaw and proud nose made him look more intense and mature. The way his lips curve reminded me of some foreign models I see in magazines.

"Uh. Uupo ka? Madumi.”

Nagkibit-balikat lamang siya at umupo sa tabi ko. Nilabas niya sa kaniyang bag ang mga pagkain na binili niya siguro sa malapit na convenience store.

"Don't let others rule your life. That's yours, own it." He stared at me while saying those words. Inalok niya pa akong kumain pero tumanggi ako. He seems to be enjoying it.

"Are you a student here? Ngayon lang kita nakita," paglakas-loob kong sabi.

"Sa gwapo kong 'to? Ngayon mo lang ako nakita? Tsk, tsk. You just missed half of your college life, miss." Ngumisi siya.

Napanganga na lamang ako sa kahanginan niya. I can't believe him. But, I also can't deny the fact that he is right. Sino nga namang hindi makakapansin sa kaniya? His whole existence is a blessing to every woman.  But, I guess... not for me.

Tinapat ko sa kaniya ang lente ng aking camera at kinuhanan siya ng litrato. Naka-side view kaya mas nadepina ang panga niya. I captured it vividly that's why it turned out great.

Humarap naman siya sa akin at matiim akong tinignan. She scanned my face using his mischievous expression. Nagulat na lamang ako ng naglahad siya sa akin ng kamay.

"Want to run away with this cool stranger?" nakangisi niyang tanong.

Walang pag-aalinlangan kong binigay ang kamay ko sa kaniya. Tumayo naman siya at inilalayan ako. Sabay kaming naglakad papunta sa parking lot at hinanap ang sasakyan niya. I think there's no problem if I will go with him. If he has a bad intention then, he must be ready because I'm going to use my infamous 'Slap Butt, Kick Front' against him. It is my signature move, dude.

Nang makarating kami sa tapat ng sasakyan niya, pinagbuksan niya ako ng pinto. Pagkatapos ay umikot siya para makasakay sa driver's seat. Nag-antanda muna siya bago paandarin ang makina na siyang nagpalaglag ng panga ko. Hindi ko talaga inaasahan iyon.

That move of him stunned me. He did the sign of the cross! Kahit na maliit na bagay lamang iyon ay talagang namangha ako. Wait. It looks like I underestimated him. First, he is good-looking. Second, he is a certified gentleman and lastly, he believes in God. My kind of guy.

"What is your name, miss?" he asked without looking at me.

May hang-over pa sa nangyari, natulala ako at hindi agad nakasagot. "U-uh! Hmm? Red."

Amused siyang tumingin sa akin at ngumuso, nahuli akong nakatulala sa kaniya. “Just Red?”

I nodded and cleared my throat to hide the embarrassment I'm feeling. “Uh-huh. Just Red.”

Tumango lamang siya at nagpatuloy sa pagmananeho. Nalagpasan na namin ang mga matatayog na establishments. We are a mile away from the campus. I know that my mother will know about my escapade and my absence. I just shrugged the thought of it and embraced the moment.

This is my first time running away from my miserable life. And it feels good— actually, the best. 

Hininto niya ang sasakyan sa gilid ng isang puno. Wala akong makitang bahay maliban sa isang sari-sari store. Napapalibutan kami ng mga puno. Wala na ring masyadong sasakyan ang dumadaan kahit pa-tanghali pa lang.

Inakay niya ako hanggang sa mapunta kami sa tapat ng isang bangin. Natulala ako doon bago napagpasyahang sumilip. Bumungad sa akin ang nakakalulang tanawin. Napaatras ako at bumangga sa aking likuran ang isang matipunong katawan.

"Welcome to my safe zone."

He sat at the edge of the cliff and stared at the view in front of us. I followed him. The view with the tall trees and calming sky made me smile. This is breathtaking. I can't believe he knows a place like this.

"Thank you for bringing me here," I whispered, contented of the silence between us.

Thank you for making me feel safe in the midst of a storm that is about to ruin my not-so-peaceful life.