Play the song when it gets to the wedding for the feels! Enjoy this happy chapter!

Collen POV

December is finally here, I’ve been doing well in therapy according to my family and friends. I’m grateful I can finally move on with my mates, my daughter… yes, my daughter. I don’t know why I ever thought I could blame a child or pretend she never existed. Lazarus as well as Callahan helped me see that. Callahan was so upset with me when I said those things, he was in worse conditions than I was, we have a similar situation with our pasts so I can understand why he was upset but he still accepted his girls  even without knowing where they were. Calder has the gift to sense when someone dies or is going to die so Callahan never gave up hope. Speaking of hope, I’m getting married tomorrow to my sexy mates. Tomorrow is the rarest celestial event, it’s a lunar eclipse and meteor shower. 

“Are you ready for your big day tomorrow?” I looked back at daddy as he sat next to me on the guest house step. I may be getting better but I couldn’t help isolating myself and keeping to myself. I know everyone has been trying to help but the memories are still there and I wouldn’t want to hurt my mates if I have one of my night terrors and lash out at them. 

“I... “ Was I ready? I live in the guest house and they live in the packhouse. How would that work? Shouldn’t I be getting married to them when I’m better? All these questions flooded in and I was having second thoughts. 

“Why don’t you go talk to Connor and Skylar.” I nod and hug him going to Connor’s and his mates house.

When I got there I knocked and Skylar opened the door. 

“Hey, Collen how are you doing?”

“I’m doing ok but I wanted to talk to you and Connor.” I rubbed the back of my neck nervously. 

“I think I know why but sure he’s in his office upstairs.” I followed him up to Connor’s office, he’s one of the best pediatric psychiatrists in town. He even does consultations in hospitals around the country. 

“He should be out of his video call meeting by now.” He knocks and we hear a ‘come in’ 

We walked in and Connor slumps in his chair sighing, It was honestly funny to see my brother look so stressed only because now he knows what I go through being a CEO, he just opened his first office four months after I got rescued. 

“Did another company withdraw fundings?” Skylar pouts. People think Connor is too young to understand what some of these kids go through and withdraw funding for his offices to keep running. He gets endorsements but it’s not enough for the big shots. 

“For once, no, that was my publicist team and one of my patients committed suicide and the parents are blaming me for it because according to them he didn’t need the therapy, to begin with, and I pushed him over the edge." 

“Aw, I’m sorry my love.” Poor Connor, he’s the most devoted person I know to help these kids and he has more kids than I have mates. Skylar is one persuasive minx, of course, they adopted the last two, they took in two of the kids that were rescued after the war. 

“Oh, hi Collen, I didn’t see you behind Skylar. How are things?” Why does everyone ask that?  I’m fine, I’m not the same broken thirty-one 
year old I was before.

“I’m nervous and scared.” Skylar and Connor exchanged knowing looks and they dragged me to the couch on the right of Connor’s desk.  

“What’s going on Collen? Just the other day you were so excited to be getting married to your mates. Is it the night terrors?” I forgot I told Connor about that. 

“I’m scared of mating, I’m scared of the flashbacks and night terrors, I want to have our bond stronger before we commit to something long term. I feel ashamed I kept a secret from them for so long about what happened to me, love is supposed to be about trust, communication, and loyalty above all the other reasons that possibly make love work but how do I marry the men I’m destined to be with if I keep holding myself and them back?” I began tearing up feeling defeated and lost. 

“Then go to the beach, recreate the memories you had with them when things weren’t shit, you still love the beach so why not go to the beach and reconnect with them, have a fun day with them, your wedding isn’t until sundown so stay at one of the beach houses dad built there.” He’s right, I haven’t been putting in the same effort as everyone else. I need to make things right with my mates. 

“Thanks, big bro, I needed that. I guess I’ll go tell them we’re going to the beach.” They nod. 

“Oh and Collen, when and if you’re ever ready to mate. Go at your pace and take your time, don’t think you need to rush things.” I nod and leave. 

After I left Connor’s I went to go see my mates and see how things go from there. 

“Beach Day in ten minutes.” I called out to my mates.

“At this time?” Calder asked groaning, he’s so sexy when he’s whining. 

“I want to go to my favorite place with my favorite guys.” They laugh at my cliche remark.

“Smooth, real smooth.” I turn to see Blake wiping off his hands and I smirk deviously. 

“What’s smooth is your daddy’s bare ass and it’s all mine for the rest of our lives starting tomorrow.” He turned pale and Titan turned a deep shade of red. 

“Dude come on… low blow bro.” He gagged. Trying to get the images of his best friend and his dad naked together. 

“Aw, are you mad at daddy.” I pouted and he glared at me walking away. 

“Funny but cruel.” Titan said laughing a little. 

Everyone else started to laugh and they went to pack or bring down their bags they always had packed just in case we planned spontaneous beach vacations. 

“How are we getting there?” Oh, my sweet Callahan is so clueless sometimes.

“Lazarus is getting stronger every night with the added bonus daddy made us the head of interrogations and Lazarus devours the tainted souls that have no chance of redemption.” They look at me in shock, yeah I have a badass wolf what of it. 

When we were ready I teleported us to Florida, I heard they had the best beach in the southeast of the USA. 

“So what’s first on the agenda?” Ivan asked, looking at me. 

“You guys pick like the dates.” They nod.

“Let's just have a movie night.” I agree and go to the kitchen grabbing snacks and drinks. I was having trouble so Killian and Xavier came to help. 

“Callahan you can pick first.” He put in the one movie that had me in tears last time. The Lion King, no matter how many times I watch Mufasa die I still break down into a sobbing mess. 

We all sat on or near the same couch and enjoyed the company.

 “What’s that smell?” We all sniffed the air looking at Xavier and Callahan, fuck their in heat. 

I walked out and called the only person I could think of, Connor. I was pacing on the beach and he finally picked up. 

“Collen, what’s wrong?”

“Callahan and Xavier are in heat and I don’t know what to do, the smell still makes me nauseous and the flashbacks start to kick in and I’m having a breakdown here.” He sighed through the phone and I could hear the springs of the bed as he got up.

“Here’s what I want you to do, I want you to count the stars in the sky just looking straight ahead, don’t worry about anything else but the stars." I took a deep breath and began counting As I got closer to a hundred, memories of all the fun times began flooding my memory. The stars were so bright and beautiful. 

“Remember Collen, you set the pace, you don't have to feel pressured to help or beat yourself up that you can’t handle it, in this moment.” I sighed.

“How did you get over it?” He hummed

“With the help of my mates assuring me that mating isn’t the same as rape, mating is lovemaking, slow, and passionate. I had to believe everything was going to be ok and my mates took care of me how I needed them to.” That sounded like heaven to me, the way he described it definitely doesn’t sound like what I went through. I can’t keep fearing mating and sex the rest of my life, that’s what I want for myself I won’t judge anyone who no longer wants anything to do with sexual acts.

“I..I think I’m ready.” I was nervous but I wasn’t so afraid anymore. My mates aren’t my torturers, they love me and I love them. 

I said bye to Connor and hung up going back inside. The smell of sex was lingering but the only smell I was focusing on was my mates. 

The next day I was proud that I stuck through with wanting to get better and wanting to mate. There was no rough actions and no crying in pain or sadness, it was of pure ecstasy and pride. I loved that feeling, I missed that feeling, I wanted to feel it again. Tonight I will be ready, I know I will, today was our wedding day and daddy is becoming more and more like a momzilla, he was so knit picky with the flowers they brought, the type of food Blair and her staff made. Has he always been like this? Oh well, I guess that’s just how daddy is. 

My mates and I were getting ready separately and meeting at the altar, Titan is really showing his age with these traditional rules. 

I was getting my haircut and styled and from here I have to get my suit. My mates and I agreed to get married in the forest in the center of the arena, Colson’s memorial thingy, and the packhouse. It wasn’t finished the last I saw it but I can tell Daddy found my wedding planner I kept for Xavier and I’s wedding with a few added touches to incorporate my other mates. Ivan wanted blue accents, Adriel wanted Grandpa to officiate the wedding, Killian wanted security to wear leather, go figure, Callahan asked if his girls could be the flower girls and I obviously said yes, Jagger wanted white doves to be released, Calder just said all he wanted, was his uncle and family there which I already had planned on having all our family attend. Alexander wanted God to attend but that's not really possible so we invited the goddesses, Gia and Orion. Titan just wanted to help in making it traditional as you can get with ten men getting married to each other. Xavier wanted me to have his grandfather’s ring. As for me, I just wanted to get married to my mates.

When I finished my errands I met up with everyone at the diner for a light lunch. 

“How does it feel to be almost married?” Sam asked. 

“Nerve-racking but worth it.” I blurted out and my mates agreed. 

Only four more hours until six o’clock and the wedding is seven so hopefully, I have time to plan for a romantic night with my mates, and hopefully, I don’t screw things up. 

With the help of Connor and papa, I got everything ready and just in time. I got up and went to the guest house to get ready and I was shaking.

 “Breathe baby boy.” Daddy said, grabbing my shaking hands as I struggled to button my shirt.

“Were you this nervous when you got married to papa?” He nodded and helped me button my shirt.

“Drink some water and breathe, you’ll be fine.” I took a deep breath and drank some water.  

Music began playing and I just about fainted or so it felt. I guess this is it. I linked arms with daddy and followed Freya and Valerie to the spot we chose. As we got there everyone turned to me and gasped. I was feeling a bit self-conscious wanting to leave but daddy patted my hand and we kept walking. Until I was standing in front of my mates, looking at how handsome they all looked with love shining in their eyes, smiling at each other and me. The lyrics to the song I picked for my mates touched me deeply as I can feel their love for me.

In your arms, I can still feel the way you
Want me when you hold me

I can still hear the words you whispered
When you told me

I can stay right here forever in your arms

And there ain't no way

I'm lettin' you go now

And there ain't no way

And there ain't no how

I'll never see that day

'Cause I'm keeping you

Forever and for always

We will be together all of our days

Want to wake up every

Morning to your sweet face, always

Mm, baby

In your heart, I can still hear

A beat for every time you kiss me

And when we're apart,

I know how much you miss me

I can feel your love for me in your heart

And there ain't no way

I'm lettin' you go now

And there ain't now way

And there ain't no how

I'll never see that day

'Cause I'm keeping you

Forever and for always

We will be together all of our days

Want to wake up every

Morning to your sweet face, always

In your eyes (I can still see the look of the one)

I can still see the look of the one who really 

loves me

(I can still feel the way that you want)

The one who wouldn't put anything
Else in the world above me (I can still see love for me)

I can still see love for me in your eyes (I still see the love)

And there ain't no way

I'm lettin' you go now
And there ain't no way

And there ain't no how

I'll never see that day

'Cause I'm keeping you

Forever and for always

We will be together all of our days

Want to wake up every

Morning to your sweet face, always

I'm keeping you

Forever and for always

We will be together all of our days

Want to wake up every

Morning to your sweet face

I'm keeping you forever and for always

I'm keeping you forever

Got to keep you, baby

Forever, in your arms

 "Friends and family...we gather here today under the moon’s guiding light and I am so grateful to be alive and to witness yet another grandchild be married and become whole. Mates are made for any and everyone, whether in this lifetime or the next, mates are your other half, they love you unconditionally, protect you with their life, and support you through thick and thin. I know for a fact Alpha Mike loved you all like his own family as he did me. He will be sadly missed." Alpha Mike was like a father to grandpa Danny but he was killed in the war, everyone took it pretty hard. People tell me not to blame myself but it's hard not to, I'm the one that got kidnapped and they found out where we lived. 

“Collen, would you read your vows please?” I nodded and sighed before reading. 

“Finding your soulmate is an amazing feeling. The kind where your knees go weak and you lose yourself. You feel comfortable in their presence and you feel as if that’s where you belong. It’s like you’ve known each other your entire life… I guess that’s why they call it soulmates. Someone who shares a lot of things in common with you and gives you space when needed. When you see each other after a long period of time it’s like you're longing for someone to hold and be home where you’re meant to be and I love you all and I thank you for being patient with me these past few months.” I smiled pouring my entire heart out meaning every word. If they only knew what I had planned for tonight. 

“Now your mates have something to say.” We waited and I smiled.

"Since there are nine of us saying vows, we had decided to go about a different way of doing this. So just be patient and I promise it will be worth it." Adriel said and I smiled at him.

"Because of you Collen, I learned to laugh again, I smile, I dare to dream again. I look forward with great joy to spending the rest of my life with you, caring for you, nurturing you, being there for you in all life has for us, and I promise to be true and faithful for as long as we remain on this Earth." Callahan said as he took my hands in his, tears pouring out of his eyes.  I wiped his cheeks and kissed his forehead. 

"I take you wholeheartedly Collen, to be my partner, loving what I know of you, and trusting what I do not yet know. I eagerly anticipate the chance to grow together, getting to know the man you will become, and falling in love a little more every day. I promise to love and cherish you through whatever life may bring us. I vow to always be by your side, to guide you on the right path, to support you in life's adventures that come our way."  Titan and his sweet self causing me to tear up so soon. 

"I, Jagger, take you, Collen, to be my wedded husband. With the deepest joy, I receive you into my life that together we may be one. I promise you my love, my fullest devotion, my tenderest care. I pledge to you my life as a loving and faithful husband, to share myself with you and to always be the light you need to find your way back home." 

"I promise, to take you, Collen, to be my husband, knowing in my heart that you will be my constant friend, my faithful partner in life, and my one true love. My commitment is made in love, kept in faith, lived in hope, and eternally made anew." Adriel took my hands and kissed my cheek when he was finished. Every one of my mates looked at me and began to speak together. 

"If you grow weak, I'll be there to fight your battles for you. I'll help you with your responsibilities and make your problems my own in order to spread the weight a bit more evenly.

If you have to carry the weight of the world on your shoulders, I'll be standing shoulder-to-shoulder with you.

From this day forward I promise you these things. I will laugh with you in times of joy and comfort you in times of sorrow. I will share in your dreams and support you as you strive to achieve your goals.

I will listen to you with compassion and understanding, and speak to you with encouragement. I will help you when you need it and step aside when you don't.

I will remain faithful to you for better or worse, in times of sickness and health. You are my best friend and I will love and respect you always." 

Not a dry eye could be seen after my mates finished, me included. I love these amazing beautiful men with all I am and I will show them every day. 

"Now the rings." Grandpa said and we exchanged rings and said I do and when it was time to kiss, let's just say a ten-way kiss is definitely something I'm still getting used to but it was amazingly beautiful. 

"Now I present to you all with such joy, the O'Brian mates!" Everyone cheered and wolf whistled as we all walked hand in hand down the middle of the aisle. Now to show my mates how much I love them and make them cry happy tears.