Naina was cleaning the kitchen platform after the dish-washing. Sameer had offered her help, but she refused.

It was a silent journey for them while returning from the clinic, while at home too nothing much was said and discussed at dinner. She needed some solitude for the time being, wanting to dive into her thoughts with nobody else around, also being the reason to dismiss Sameer's help.

When the doctor confirmed the negative result, she was disheartened. Was anything wrong with her body? Okay they were using the protection all the while, then what must be the reason behind the delayed periods? Last month it had come two weeks later, and today after a week of her due date, she was still waiting.

While looking at Sameer after the disclosure, she had to paste a smile on her lips. Contemplating at his posture when he entered the cabin, she had clearly known that he was pacing outside, worried. Worried about the result.

He needed time.... If not his words then his eyes must have told this to her a thousand times.

And she respected the fact every time. It was a big decision and they couldn't take it just like that. They both had decided to treat it in a conscious manner, by mutual consent and not something that happened accidentally. She wanted both of them to be fully ready to take this step... mentally, physically, emotionally and most importantly financially.

The doctor's advice on her health perturbed her though. What more did she need to do to take care of herself? And where is the time for that? And even if she could fix the disorder in her body, how could she fix the one in her mind?

Nothing was going right for her. This was the second time she faced the same dilemma about her pregnancy news. However, after last time, she had decided not to get carried away by the assumptions and probabilities, building new dreams in her mind before even fulfilling the existing ones. She had decided to be practical about it. Wasn't she always the practical one between the two?

If only there was a system that could let one stop all this... from thinking about the sweet moments of her and Sameer with their little one... from being overwhelmed knowing that there's a life growing inside her... from imagining the reactions of Papa, Preeti, Arjun bhaiya, chachaji-chachiji, Maa and everyone after sharing the news.

She couldn't!! She couldn't stop herself from visualizing this beautiful picture at least once.

And she feared the most thinking if Sameer too dreamt about it. She wondered what if Sameer took the pressure of it. Wasn't he pursuing the production houses for the same? What if he made some impulsive decisions under its influence?

There were questions to be resolved for her, including the one about the repetitive dreams she saw of being chased.

She had never seen a pattern in her dreams before. This one certainly had been the most unusual thing that happened to her recently. The dream repeating for a couple of times was okay, but seeing if after every few days? How can that be possible? What was it that her mind was trying to tell her?

"Naina?"

Rakesh stood expectantly near the kitchen door-frame.

"Ji Papa?" she said, wiping her wet hands to a cloth.

These two weeks were hectic as ever for the family, since Rakesh too had joined the library full-time. He had the luxury to work for less hours and for three days a week before. Now, he too was bound by the timings and days, making the mornings of the Maheshwari's turning into chaos almost daily, causing to-and-fro between Sameer and Rakesh as who'd use the bathroom first.

Amongst all the preparations for going to their respective works, amongst returning home at different timings, amongst making their overall 'living' better, they got little time to peacefully talk. If it ever happened, it happened in the corridors, in the kitchen, in the balcony... and barely at dinner.

Maybe it was 'life' that was happening to them. The worries of the future, about making enough money for a sustainable living, of making this crowded city一 which was on its way to make a big name for itself in the 'world'一 as theirs... all of it overpowered their simple and non-chaotic days in Ahmedabad. There were no lazy walks on the streets, no casual pani-puri outings, no back to back movies on the rented VCR, nor the 'let's do nothing today' days.

"Beta woh..." Rakesh cleared his throat before proceeding, "kya kaha doctor ne?"

Naina averted her gaze, feeling guilty about not sharing the details with Papa at the dinner. He knew they went to the gynecologist and for what, but she should have told him without asking. His eyes and that small smile on his lips notified her that he was ready to celebrate any moment.

"Kuchh hormonal imbalance hua hai Papa... isiliye periods nahi aa rahe hai. " She used direct words, having no strength to face his excited gazes anymore. "Baki kal reports mein pata chalega."

"Haan toh iska matlab一"

"Papa," Naina cut him in, before his smile turned wider, "aap jaisa soch rahe hai waisa kuchh nahi hai..."

Rakesh controlled hard not to show his disappointment much on his face. Naina's shrunken cheeks hadn't gone unnoticed by him in the last couple of months. It wasn't that she was unwell or something, but she wasn't completely fine either.

He pursed his lips and nodded, patting her cheek softly, he said, "apna khayal rakhna beta."

****

Naina strolled in the bedroom after Rakesh went for his walk. She took each step carefully, delaying the talk with Sameer. The way he was standing near the window, staring out with a pensive look with his hands folded, she knew the talk was inevitable.

He released his crossed hands as he sensed her presence, looking at her with a composed look on his face.

She couldn't guess what exactly was on his mind when he pulled her closer and caressed her cheek with utmost love. His eyes oozed nothing but concern and it only made her scared.

What if he asked her for something he is not ready for?

It made her heart crumple into pieces. Sameer could do anything for her, be it preparing himself for welcoming their little one in the world, even if they lack everything for it at the moment.

There were questions in his eyes and she braced herself to face them. She was ready to do anything for him...

"Naina, kya tum sach mein CA karna chahti ho?"

The question rang in the room, finally breaking the spell of tranquility.

"Kya?" It took moments for the question to register to Naina.

"Tum iss articleship se, CA karne se khush ho?"

When Sameer had seen the nightmare of the railway platform months ago, he had realized days after how it was entirely the reflection of his state of mind, of what he was going through. He was facing rejections and failures back then, while Naina was making progress like a Queen.

Knowing the capacity of the human brain surprised him, of how it took the fragments of his broken heart, mixed it with his fear of travelling with Naina in a local and losing her in the crowd, and then put it on display for him in the dream as if a 70mm blockbuster picture.

He always looked at Naina as someone who's fearless, someone who's practical, brave and has a strong mind and guts. Heavy realization dawned upon him when he fathomed that his little minx was after all a human, who has her own fears and issues.

Dropping CA would have stopped their fixed income and as swabhimani as she could be, she wasn't much ready for running the house only on Papa's salary.

He cursed himself for forgetting that he had asked Naina once whether she was happy with her articleship and how she had smartly tackled the question. He believed Naina was strong enough to manage but the remembrance of one of her dialogues proved him wrong.

Jab mann udaas ho, toh sharir bhi chhoti–moti shikayat karne lagta hai.

He was a fool to ignore this. Her losing weight, the dark circles under her eyes, the delayed periods... the nightmares. She was in an internal battle for such a long time and that had taken a toll on her health for real.

And the battle was about investing most of your day's time and energy into something you're not enjoying much and finding very less time for something your heart belonged to. And the most painful thing in this battle was the first one being the breadwinner.

Naina gulped a lump in her throat. She wasn't expecting this question to be thrown at her. She was caught off guard to be honest.

"Mai khush hu," she managed a smile, "balki Deshpande sir bhi mere kaam se bahot khush hai. Woh toh keh rahe the mai group 1 ek hi attempt mein一"

"Naina," Sameer stopped her blabbering, "tum ek bright ladki ho. Tum jo bhi karogi usme excel hi karogi." He sighed before continuing, "lekin mera sawaal woh nahi hai."

His serious demeanor alarmed Naina about the prospective conversation awaiting her.

"Bahot der ho gayi hai na," she said, "so jate hai. Kal se teen din tumhara shoot bhi hai na..."

Her attempt to leave Sameer's hand and walk to the mattress failed miserably. Sameer's hold was strong enough to not let her budge from her place even an inch. She was pulled back right to his chest.

"Kab tak aur kis-kisse door bhagogi Naina? Sirf ek baar pichhe moodkar uska saamna toh karo?"

Naina's heartbeat took a pace at Sameer's vague question. This wasn't only about her avoiding the question at this moment, but the words he chose to speak with implied he was also talking about her dream.

"Tumhe aisa kuchh bhi karne ki zaroorat nahi hai jisme tum khush nahi ho..." He pleaded with his eyes, his voice was earnest.

"Mai jo bhi kar rahi hu mai usme khush hu Sameer." Naina came with a stern reply. "Main woh apni marzi se aur poore dil se kar rahi hu..."

Sameer shook his head, "kam se kam apne aap se toh jhooth mat bolo Naina... hum dono jaante hai tumhara dil kaha basta hai, kya chahta hai..." He softned his gaze as he stroked her arms, "tum hamesha se ek lekhika banna chahti thi na... toh tum wahi karo jiske baare mein tum bachpan se sapne dekhti aayi ho..."

The unsent letter to Shanti teacher in her notebook surfaced in his memory again. She had dreamt of becoming a writer since she was a kid, becoming a CA must have come only because the elders in the house suggested her. Just like how it happens in every common household.

"Toh mai manage kar rahi hu na..." Naina said, "jaise tumhe promise kiya tha waise... office, padhai, meri kahaniyaan... sab balance kar rahi hu..."

She was giving every cell of her body in fulfilling every task, every job she was asked for. None of this was forced on her and she liked doing it all.

Sameer couldn't deny that. She managed everything so effortlessly that anyone could hardly notice how it was affecting her health.

"Tumhe superwoman banne ki zaroorat nahi hai Naina... mai jaanta hu aaj kayi mahilayein subah se raat tak ghar ke, office ke saare kaam karti hain... unke paas shayad koi choice nahi hai... lekin tumhare paas hai na..." he caressed her cheek, "aur mai hu na tumhare sath... tum sirf apna khayal rakho..."

Naina frowned, fearing what he was about to say. "Matlab?"

Sameer peered into her deep eyes. Maybe she already knew what all this talk was about, but wasn't ready to face it, nor she wanted to hear it from him.

"Tum sirf apni kahaniyon par focus karo... baki mai sambhal lunga..." He didn't utter 'the' sentence, but wished for Naina to understand it.

Naina blinked her eyes, "tum chahte ho mai CA chhod du?" Sameer heaved a sigh of relief, he only nodded, still oozing calmness from his eyes.

"Sameer tum hosh mein toh ho?" Naina pushed herself back from his hold. "Tum jaante ho tum kya keh rahe ho?"

Her voice turned accusing, slightly raised as she countered. Her stance turned defensive and attacking at the same time. But inside, her heart was weakening its protest, it was almost giving up the pretense of being strong.

"Aur yeh mat bhoolna hum yaha Mumbai mein kyun aaye hai..." she voiced, controlling the tremble in it. "Hum yahan tumhara hero banne ka sapna poora karne aaye hai... mere writer banne ka nahi... aur uske liye mujhe CA karna zaroori hai."

"Mai jaanta hu hum yaha mere liye aaye the... lekin iska matlab yeh nahi hai ki tum tumhare sapne par dhyan na do..." he pulled her closer to him again, despite her resistance he held her strongly, "Mumbai aana shayad hamare taqdeer mein hi likha tha... lekin yeh kaha likha hai ki tum apne writer banne ka sapna poora nahi kar sakti? Tum ek bahot badi aur kaamyab lekhika banogi mujhe yaqeen hai..."

"Woh mujhe jab banna hoga mai bann jaungi... lekin iss waqt woh meri priority nahi hai."

"Kyu zidd kar rahi ho yaar..." Sameer's shoulders slumped, "kabhi apne aap ko aaine mein dekho Naina... iss over exertion ka asar seedhe tumhari health par ho raha hai."

Naina averted her gaze, crossing her arms. She didn't need to remind to look at herself in the mirror. She grimaced at her reflection almost daily.

"Tumhare sapne mein tum jis baat se, jis sachhai se door bhag rahi ho, woh yahi hai Naina... tumhara ek writer banne ka sapna... yahi tumhara sach hai... please uska saamna karo."

Naina swallowed hard. She scorned his statement because somewhere it had some truth in it. Some truth? No, this was probably the only truth of her life she wasn't prepared to get exposed to. This was her reality.

"Sameer tum kyu cheezon ko complicate kar rahe ho? Boutique ke samay bhi yahi kiya tha humne... haar maan kar sab kuchh chhod kar aa gaye the yahan. Aur ab tum chahte ho mai CA bhi chhod du? Yahi karti rahu mai?"

Sameer noticed how she had said it more often that they should have tried harder for the boutique business. She still feels guilty about leaving it midway.

"Yeh mai nahi hu Sameer..." her voice trembled this time, her eyes glistening, "maine jab bhi kisi cheez ko karna chaha hai maine usse poori shiddat se nibhaya hai... aur agar maine thaan liya hai tumhe hero bante hue dekhna, toh uske liye jo karna pade mai karungi..."

A warm smile appeared on Sameer's face. Her love for him can never falter, come what may. She appeared as a stubborn little girl to him, who wanted to prove something to her parents. She wasn't trying to prove anything here though, she looked at it as something so obvious, so trivial. Fulfilling her husband's dream was much bigger and more important to her than her own. He found her love almost on the level of devotion.

"Shshshshsh... Relax..." He wiped the tears that cascaded down her cheeks, trying to soothe her. Kissing her forehead and cheeks, he provided her the warmth she badly wanted.

"Wada karo agli baar iss topic par baat nahi karoge..." she asked sweetly, looking at him with her gleaming eyes.

"Nahi..." Sameer said softly, pushing her hairlock behind her ear, "mai aisa koi wada nahi karunga..."

****

Preeti pinned the saree on her shoulder, looking at the mirror the last time before picking her hand-bag and rushing to the living room. She was getting late for her class. Filling a glass of water from the jar on the dining table, she spared a minute for herself.

"Bhabhi," Tanvi called for her attention, ready to go out. "Mai bhi aapke sath chal rahi hu." She declared.

"Kya? Class mein?" Preeti asked, perplexed.

Tanvi chuckled, "Nahi bhabhi... sirf bahar tak ke chal rahi hu," she leaned forward closer to Preeti and whispered, "taaki Maa jyada sawaal na kare."

Preeti observed her cautiously. She wore a red top and denim skirt, her hair pushed back with a hairbelt and red stone earrings donning her ears. She looked really pretty.

"Kahan ja rahi ho tum?" Preeti asked her, her brows curved in more suspicion than curiosity.

"Preeti betaa...." Nirmalaji joined the two before Preeti could get an answer from Tanvi. "Ab tu hi samjha iss ladki ne. Mhare se toh samajh na rahi." She sighed helplessly, "manne toh sirf thari yeh class khatm hone ka intejar hai. Taaki iss ladki ki shadi ki tayyari kar saku." She pressed her fingers on Tanvi's temples.

Preeti and Tanvi exchanged glances as Nirmalaji continued to express her worry about Tanvi trying to delay the talks of her marriage. "Ab itne achchhe rishte baar-baar thodi na mil sake hai?" she added.

"Ummm... mummyji..." Preeti checked her watch and gasped, "mai Tanvi se raaste mein baat karti hu... pakka..."

She pulled Tanvi with her towards the door, saving both herself and Tanvi from another lecture about why this is the right time to get married for Tanvi.

"Thanks Bhabhi... aapne bacha liya..." Tanvi chirped as they took the stairs.

"Tum bhi na Tanvi..." Preeti shook her head. "Waise tumhe shadi kyu nahi karni abhi? College khatm hone ke 6 mahine baad maine bhi shadi kar li thi."

"Bhabhi... aapne kar li isilye mai bhi karu? Mujhe nahi karni abhi shadi-wadi."

"Lekin kyuuu?" Preeti asked exasperated as they stepped out of the C wing. "Koi wajah toh honi chahiye..."

"Maine bataya na bhabhi..."

"Tanvi," Preeti snorted, "sach kahu toh mujhe tumhara ek bhi jawab convincing nahi lagta. Mere liye yeh sirf tumhare bahane hai..."

Stepping out of the main gate, Preeti thought of taking an auto for the class. The last month of the specialization course was starting from today, where she had enrolled for hairstyling without a second thought. There was no need to tell how excited she was for this.

The two months of the course had passed too smoothly for her to believe and now the last month almost appeared as a countdown of this newly found freedom of two hours for her.

Nonetheless, she had enjoyed every single bit of it, excelling in all the departments that were taught to them. A call with Anand last night wishing for Uttarayan had turned so heartwarming for her later, where Anand praised her for doing so well in the class. He admitted that in the end it was just a matter of her pursuing something she really liked, and that the marks and grades were only nominal. And that he was so proud of her.

"Bhabhi, mujhe iss taraf jana hai..." Tanvi pointed to the right.

Preeti was brought out of her thoughts as Tanvi was looking for an auto. "Tanvi," Preeti voiced, forcing Tanvi to look at her, "yeh jo tumhari dost hai Aditi... usse agli baar ghar par bulana..."

Preeti smiled, but the color on Tanvi's face was completely worn out.

****

Sameer got down at the Andheri bus stop and chose to walk to get back home. It was a pleasant afternoon in mid-January, where neither the Sun was unreasonably hot nor the Mumbai air humid. Any person taking a walk in this weather should be in a joyful mood, but Sameer wasn't.

He was thinking deeply... right from when he left the set.

It was the third and last day of his shoot on the sets of AK Films, Aruna Irani's production house. He was glad about how his role had an important part in the serial and how smooth his stint was across the days. Right from having casual chats with an actress like Aruna Irani to writing a poem for her character. He hadn't imagined he would get to learn so much on the sets.

It was a 7am call time today for him and he finished his last shot by 1pm, right before lunch was declared. After finding almost all of the crew gone for lunch but Aruna Irani, he took the chance to speak to her, looking for feedback for his work.

Having such an experienced person around him was an opportunity he might not get often. Her personality was enough to let everyone know that she wore her heart on her sleeves. There would be no better person than her to ask this.

"Sach kahu? Ya sirf tumhare sawaal ka jawaab du?" she had asked, propping her chin on her fist, sitting on the couch. There was a playful smile on her lips.

Sameer hadn't expected such a remark from her. "Ma'am, sach hi kahiye." he replied honestly, sitting on the edge of the adjacent couch.

"Sameer, kaam toh tumne achchha kiya hai..." She started, "iss character ko bakhubi se samajh sake ho tum... kuchh scenes bahot achchhe the... lekin kuchh scenes thode average the." She made a gesture using her hand. "Mujhe lagta hai thodi aur improvement ki zaroorat hai."

Sameer pursed his lips and nodded. He wondered if this was the common phrase used by the industry people, because this was the third time he had received the exact same feedback.

'Thodi aur improvement ki zaroorat hai...'

But improve what?

He stopped by a stationery shop nearby as Naina had suggested her stock was getting over. He purchased the pens, refills, pencils, foolscap papers and two new notepads for her.

"Yeh lijiye sir, yeh naya pen aaya hai market mein... cello gripper..." the shopkeeper showed him a new pen, "ekdum badhiya likhai hai iski... kehte hai isse handwriting bhi improve hoti hai..."

Improve. See? It's that simple.

Telling people where you need to improve instead of just saying that you need to improve.

However, he didn't expect his conversation with Arunaji would actually take a totally different route. She asked him where he stays and how he manages his expenses. When Sameer studied her keenly, he discerned that she asked it out of pure concern for a young man sitting in front of her.

After sharing happily that his wife does an articleship and his father-in-law works in a library, a thought struck his mind, followed by dwindling of his smile. Whatever he had contributed to the house expenses was only through the commercials, which were again countable on his single hand, and not from any television project. His smile was back only when Arunuaji praised his father-in-law living with them, saying that was indeed a progressive step hardly a few would dare to take.

"Waise... Aur ek sach kahu?" she had asked after a while.

"Haan please..." Sameer was all ears.

"Jitna bhi maine tumhe observe kiya hai, mujhe tum camera ke pichhe jyada interested lagte ho... jaise camera work, direction... hai na?"

"Ji..." Sameer had smiled gently, "mujhe achchha lagta hai technical aspects ke baare mein jaan'na..."

"Toh, tumne kabhi as an assistant director kaam karne ke baare mein nahi socha?"

He opened the latch with the key and sauntered in the house, taking his shoes and socks off while still thinking. Keeping the paper bag containing stationery on the tea-table, he sat on the couch, spreading his legs and leaning back.

Arunaji's casual but inquisitive questions had provided him food for thought. He kept looking at the ceiling, pondering on Arunaji's words before he took her leave. He still remembered the sentence word by word, just as she said.

'yeh television industry abhi kaafi unorganized hai... iss industry mein kaam milte rehna bahot mushkil hai... aur usse bhi jyada mushkil hai uss kaam ke sahi waqt par paise milna...'

He was slightly surprised to hear this straight from a producer, who had no shame in admitting the flaws of the system she was a big part of.

As he tried to dig in the conversation, he learnt that the payments of the crew are done by the production house itself, and not via the channel. So the 90 days payment system isn't for the people who work specifically for a production house. They get payments on a contract basis.

Another dysfunctional side of the industry shoved right on his face.

'Agar tum assistant director bante ho, toh tumhe kaafi cheezein sikhne ko milegi. Tum kalakaron ko dekhkar acting sikh sakte ho, direction sikh sakte ho, pre-production, scheduling, management... yeh sab sikhne milega... aur maze ki baat... tumhe uske paise bhi milenge...'

She had laughed at the last sentence when Sameer tried to know about the advantages of becoming an AD. But he was stunned when she actually offered him to work as an AD in AK films... only if he feels like it.

Heaving a deep sigh and leaning forward, Sameer brushed his face in his palms, dragging the palms further up and ruffling his hair. The new year had begun but life hadn't stopped throwing daily challenges at him. And today's challenge was the idea of an AD.

Yes, he had gradually developed the likeness towards observing the details about the camera work, shot designing, direction, everything about how 'behind the scenes' are. But that didn't mean he wanted to become a director or a cinematographer. Did he?

What did he even want to become in the first place?

The question from his subconscious mind appeared on the surface.

What was that he truly enjoyed doing in all this time he spent here in Mumbai?

Didn't he come here to become a hero? As Naina often says? A Filmstar?

What happened to that?

As he recalled, the last time he went for a film audition seemed a long time ago. Two months. He had gone for a film audition in October. Really a long span for someone who wanted to become a HERO.

If he thought of defining his journey, the time since he came here in Mumbai in November '95, to now January '97 in a single word, then it would be a rollercoaster... with sharp ups and downs... and if he became a little harsh on himself, then it would be haphazard.

There was no continuity in what he had decided. From wanting to become a film star一a hero, to then mending himself and auditioning for the side roles, to doing 30 second advertisements, to going for the television projects in a hope to get cast as a lead role, to getting small roles of a side character in the shows.

If he drew lines defined by the events, then it appeared as a graph going downwards. 

He took the diversions the way life made him to. He met different people, who advised different things to him, and he acted on it too.

Getting up from the couch, he started pacing in the living room. Did even a single thing happen the way he had planned for in Ahmedabad?

Was this really the life he had imagined?

No...

He had imagined films, posters, interviews, articles, photoshoots.

He had imagined how his entry shot might be similar to the one in Phool aur Kaante, where Ajay Devgan balances himself on two bikes. That he would tell the director he can perform the stunts having already done it in Delhi a long time ago, and then receive an appreciation for doing it so well.

He had imagined how he would do all the fight sequences by himself, like Akshay Kumar does. He had imagined how he wouldn't strum his fingers on a guitar like an idiot when he would sing a song for the heroine, because he knew how to play one. And then impress the people on the set, especially the girl crowd with his guitar-playing skills and of course his handsome looks.

He had always imagined how he would tease Naina after romancing a girl on screen, deliberately annoy her with the detailing of the scene and see her turn all grumpy and cranky. And then how he would make love to her, making her forget everything and reinstate the fact that he belongs to only her. And then how Naina would turn them around seeking dominance, telling how she always knew it and she too was just playing along with him.

He had imagined.... Well... he had imagined a lot...

Isn't that the basic nature of a human mind? To dream? To create beautiful scenarios in mind that provides him happiness and gratification?

The cordless rang and Sameer shot a glance at the wall clock. It was 3pm. Frowning at who the caller must be at this time, he picked it up.

"Sameer? Mai Paritosh bol raha hu..." spoke the person from the other end.

Sameer frowned, remembering. Oh, Paritosh was with him in a project that he had shot for in September. The project they were still waiting to get the broadcast date for.

"Haan Paritosh, bol na..." Sameer couldn't bring the excitement to his face while speaking to someone after long. He sounded plain.

"Mai apne show ke telecast ke silsile mein production house se baat kar raha tha," Paritosh came straight to the point, "unse toh nahi... lekin mujhe kisi aur se pata chala hai ki hamara show scap kar diya gaya hai... It's not going to broadcast anymore."

Sameer stopped pacing. The scenarios that he was reliving in his head some time ago came crumbling under his feet, crushed.

Paritosh went on to share with him details of how there was a budget issue with the broadcasting channels, which led the the production house to scrap the whole project itself. It was all redundant for Sameer, the only thing worthy of keeping for him was...

no broadcasting... means no money...

The reality sank in. This was his reality. This was the picture of his present, and not something he had dreamt of long back in Ahmedabad with Naina... and also dared to dream again a few moments ago.

He came to the fact that he was far away from recreating even a fraction of his imagination.

The only thing he was doing here was going to auditions, stand for 'fit-not fit' tests, and if gotten a chance then act on some good and some average scenes for a tv show, and then wait forever for it to get telecast.

His breathing quickened after the call got disconnected. His fists tightened, one of them almost squashing the cordless in his hand. His lips sealed tight on one another as anger surged inside him, while his eyes fumed with rage.

The cordless was flung in the air, towards the sofa, which banged on the edge of the couch and fell on the floor, broken. Whatever items that sat idle on the tea-table were swept away by his hand, resulting in the stationery items from the paper bag getting hurled across the floor and the newspapers and magazines flying in the air before settling on the tiles completely messed up.

He stood facing the antique wooden showcase beside the cupboard. It had an oval shaped mirror that did its job of showing his reflection to him perfectly. Sameer gazed at himself in it. His chest was heaving up and down, his hair falling freely on his forehead, his cheeks flushed due to anger and his shirt wrinkled.

He didn't like it. He hated it...

He hated himself... immensely... because after the call, he was actually considering the AD offer by Aruna Irani.

He hated himself for not sticking to one thing. Naina was right. They can't jump from one thing to another. But he had no option if he wanted his Naina in the best of her health. He had no option if he wanted to pursue her again for giving up on CA. He had no option if he wanted to make her believe that he would take care of the expenses.

He hated himself...

The cassettes and books on the showcase were thrown on the floor. The ceramic showpieces and vases also took their respective places, almost close to the cordless stand as they were flung hard. Some were broken, some not.

Just as his heart... where a part of it was broken and bruised... but a part of it was still fine and kept beating because it had his Naina in it.

****

Naina opened the door of the house with an acute pain in her stomach. Her periods had finally come, again in office. But thanks to the Saturday, she could return home at her half-day timings.

A wrapped paper bag in her hand denoted she had visited the chemist before returning home. It contained her tablets for iron, calcium and injections for vitamin B12 as recommended by the doctor. Her body lacked the vital supplements.

She had to halt herself in the passage as a cassette lying on the floor welcomed her. As her gaze traversed the floor, she found multiple cassettes, pens, newspapers and much more lying on it. Her heart skipped a beat looking at the mess.

Her gaze stabilized on Sameer, who was sitting on the couch, absolutely wretched. He had propped his chin on the palm of his left hand and his eyes were lost staring at somewhere on the wall next to Lord Krishna idol.

Her breath hitched, sensing something bad had already happened.

"Sameer..." she rushed to him, dodging the objects on the floor. "Kya hua?" she shifted the tea-table making space for herself, kneeling down in front of him.

"Sameer kya hua?" she asked again, shaking his hand with a futile attempt of making him look at her.

She looked down when a fluid-like substance was felt by her toe and she gasped, spotting the drops of blood on the floor. As she scrutinized, the ring finger of his right hand, which was lying idle on his knee, was bleeding. She turned back to look at the mess, recognizing he must have hurt himself unknowingly while hurling the things.

She worked fast, cleaning the dried blood on his finger with a wet cloth and then putting a cotton ball of dettol on the injured part. Thankfully the cut wasn't deep and the blood flow had already stopped.

"Sameer... meri taraf dekho..." This time, she cradled his face, making him face her and trying to find something in his glossy eyes. "Kya baat hai? Kya hua hai? Mera dil ghabra raha hai..."

What he uttered swept the floor away from her feet. Her hands fell down on his knees for support, her lungs forgot to breathe for the moment and sweat beads formed on her forehead. She couldn't believe it when he said一

"Mai acting chhod raha hu, Naina..."

********

Hey peeps, how's you all? I hope you'll are doing fine.

Happy new year to you all. May this year bring everything that you wish for.

This was the 50th chapter and trust me I never thought I'd reach here with you all by my side. Thanks for sticking with me.

How was this chapter? I'm really curious to know your views on it.

The talk about Naina's career was long pending, but she cannot straightaway change her mind. It would require time. What's your take on it?

What do you think about the offer given to Sameer? and the last line?

Also, in the last chapter, Rakesh got his first ever nameplate and a cabin. While Preeti to is  happy and content in her life. It was disappointing to see hardly 1 person speaking on them. Shower your love to them too guys, don't just revolve around Samaina.

Annddd at last, do vote and comment. I'm missing some regular commenters here, making it difficult for me to understand if you're aligned with what I wanted to say.

So please, do comment.

See you soon.

Love, Mugs 💕