Song above if you want to listen to it
Yes, this is to make up for what I wrote last song-fic
WARNING: Mention of discrimination, mention of Hell and going to it

"Janus! Janus, wait."

Janus didn't look behind him, instead he kept on walking until he got to the tent. It was funny. The cirus, where he was exploited for looking like himself, was the only place he could be who he was.

You know I want you
It's not a secret I try to hide

"They're small-minded people, Janus."

Janus didn't look at Logan, focusing on the snake that had wound up his arm.

"I don't care about what they say, Janus. I want to be with you."

I know you want me

"I know that, Logan." Janus snapped. Then he sighed. "And I want that too. But it wouldn't work."

"Why not?" Logan asked, crossing his arms.

So don't keep sayin' our hands are tied
You claim it's not in the cards

"You're meant to be logical, aren't you? So think logically. Not only are we both men, there's this to worry about," Janus motioned to the intertwining scars on the side of his face, "and you're a person of a high status. And I'm me."

"So what? You really think anyone would care about any of that?" Logan laughed at the back of his throat. "Besides, I've been disowned. No one would care if we were together."

And fate is pullin' you miles away
And out of reach from me

"I would care, Lo. I would care because I would be putting you in danger." Janus carefully lifted the snake off his arm and put it back in its cage. "You're too far out of my reach, anyway." He mumbled.

But you're here in my heart
So who can stop me if I decide
That you're my destiny?

Logan took a careful step closer to Janus and, when it looked like Janus wouldn't run away again, another.

"I'm right here, Janus." Logan said softly. "And you're right here, too." He pointed at his heart. "So why should someone else decide what we do?"

What if we rewrite the stars?

"What if we changed fate? Changed the stars?" Janus looked at the taller boy worriedly.

"Logan, this doesn't sound like you. Are you okay?"

"I'm fine." Logan reached for Janus' hand but Janus hid his hands behind his back. Logan sighed slightly and took a step back.

Say you were made to be mine
Nothing could keep us apart

"We couldn't change the stars, Lo."

"We could try. What would keep us apart then?"

"Think clearly, Logan. No one's going to listen to two people who work at the circus, one of who's a freak."

"Don't call yourself that. You're not." Logan's voice was somehow fierce yet soft. "And I am thinking clearly. I don't think I've ever thought so clearly in my life."

You'd be the one I was meant to find
It's up to you, and it's up to me
No one can say what we get to be

"It's up to us, Janus." Logan tried to take Janus' hand again and this time Janus didn't pull away. Logan pressed a gentle kiss to Janus' knuckles. "It's up to us. We can decide who we get to be."

So why don't we rewrite the stars?
Maybe the world could be ours
Tonight

Janus looked down at the sawdust-covered floor, afraid that if he looked at Logan, he'd be taken in by the idea.

"But how?" He said eventually. "We're not masters of our fate. That's decided for us."

"Maybe every other day. But tonight, we can be ourselves." Logan gestured around the empty ring. "We're alone, anyway. Who's here to judge?"

Janus bit the inside of his lip and slid his hand out of Logan's.

"Janus, the world could be ours."

"No. No, it couldn't."

You think it's easy
You think I don't wanna run to you

"Why not?" Logan was getting exasperated now. "Janus, why can't we just be ourselves for one night?"

"Because it wouldn't be just one night. It would happen again and again and again." Janus sighed and turned his back on Logan. "I am already going to Hell for looking the way I do, Lo. I am already damned because of what's happened to my face." He reached into a cage with one of his snakes and picked it up. Trying to distract himself from even looking at Logan. "I want to hold on to that shred of hope that I might go to Heaven, that God might take pity on me. But if I stay with you tonight..." Janus waved his snake-free hand. "That hopes gone."

"So tell me to leave." Logan said, straightening his glasses. "Tell me to get out and I will."

Janus closed his eyes and shook his head slightly. "You think it's so easy, don't you?"

But there are mountains
And there are doors that we can't walk through

"You really think that I want any of this?"

Logan opened his mouth but something in his face softened and the answer that came out wasn't the one Janus had been expecting. "Don't you?"

"I-... I don't know." Janus looked down at the snake on his arm and stroked its head gently. "All I know is that we can't go anywhere together."

I know you're wondering why because we're able to be
Just you and me within these walls

"Why can't we?"

Janus shook his hair out of his face and glared at Logan. "Sheltered children never learn anything." He muttered to himself.

"Well then I want to learn." Logan stepped over the barrier around the ring. "I want to know why."

"Because we can't. Because society doesn't accept us. Is that clear enough for you?"

But when we go outside, you're gonna wake up and see
That it was hopeless after all

"But society can change, Janus. I've seen it change. Slaves have been set free, the reform bill's come into play, women are taking their own lives into their own hands. Society will change for us too."

"When, Lo? When will it change?" Janus asked. "You can't answer that because you know what you said wasn't true." He looked down at the ground. "Society only changes for the people it wants to change for."

No one can rewrite the stars
How can you say you'll be mine?

"We can be those people, Janus. We can change the world."

"You're delusional, Logan." Janus snapped. "We can't change the world, we can't change fate, change the stars. They're set in stone."

"Stone gets chipped away."

"But that takes years and years and years. How can you be sure that you'll still be here when it's done?"

Everything keeps us apart
And I'm not the one you were meant to find

"Because... because if I'm not, I will have spent every second of the rest of my life wishing that I was." Logan looked down, playing with his hands. "I've never met someone like you before and I never will again. If fate didn't want us to meet, why are we here now?"

"Because fate is cruel, Logan." Janus' eyes were ice. "Fate doesn't want us to be happy, it wants us to suffer. It wants us to regret and to hate. And I am regretting. Regretting the time I thought that you were right." Janus' face softened slightly, pity ghosting across it. "I'm not the one you're meant to find, Logan. And you're not the one I'm meant to find either."

It's not up to you
It's not up to me

"Then walk away."

"What?"

"Walk away right now." Logan shrugged. "If you won't tell me to walk away, do it yourself."

"Don't you get it? I can't!" Janus yelled. "It's not up to me."

When everyone tells us what we can be

"Then who is it up to, Janus. If it's not up to you what you do with your life, who is it up to?"

"Everyone else! Society. I can't breathe without society bearing down on me, Lo. And I've accepted my place at the bottom of the pile. It's time you accept yours."

Logan motioned as if to take Janus' hand but stopped. "My place," he said slowly, "is with you."

How can we rewrite the stars?
Say that the world can be ours
Tonight

Tears sprung to Janus' eyes and he pulled the snake off his arm and turned to run. Logan grabbed him by the hand and stopped him.

"Let go of me, Logan." Logan did but Janus made no further attempts to escape. Instead, he scrubbed at his eyes and bowed his head.

"You don't have to run away from me, Janus. I'm not a threat to you."

"But you are."

"I'm not a threat to you in life. Please, Janus, stay with me. Just for now."

Janus shook his head and scrubbed at his eyes more. He still made no attempts to leave.

All I want is to fly with you
All I want is to fall with you
So just give me all of you

"I can't stay." Janus said eventually, when he was sure he wasn't going to break down crying. "And neither can you. We're both a threat if we stay."

"We don't have to be." Logan held out his hand and, after some hesitation, Janus took it. "We can rewrite the stars, Janus. We're doing it just by being here, now."

It feels impossible
It's not impossible
Is it impossible?
Say that it's possible

Janus shook his head, though whether it was to disagree with Logan or to try and disagree with himself he wasn't sure.

"It's impossible."

"Then I guess we're making it possible." Janus looked down at his hands that was still in Logan's and felt a small smile creep onto his face.

"I... guess we are."

How do we rewrite the stars?
Say you were made to be mine?

"So? What do you say? Are we going to change the stars?"

Janus smiled shyly at Logan. "I suppose. How do we start?"

Nothing can keep us apart
'Cause you are the one I was meant to find

Logan shrugged. "Well, why don't we start simple? I love you, Janus Dagger."

Janus felt the smile slip off his face and fear crept into his eyes. Somehow, Logan saying that he loved him had broken whatever spell had been giving Janus hope.

"Janus? Janus, are you alright? Do you need to sit down?"

Janus pulled his hand out of Logan and rubbed it. "I'm fine."

It's up to you
And it's up to me

"Have I done something wrong?" Worry was written across Logan's face. Janus shook his head, screwing his eyes up tight.

"No, no, you've not done anything. I just... you're confused. And, and so am I. That's got to be it, right?"

"Janus." Logan said quietly as if he was talking to someone who wasn't in the right frame of mind. "I'm not confused. I've overstepped, haven't I? I'm sorry for scaring you."

No one can say what we get to be
And why don't we rewrite the stars?
Changing the world to be ours

"You've not scared me. I just... it, it's late and you should be getting back to your lodgings."

"I-"

"Don't apologise, Logan." Janus met Logan's gaze and saw his own despair mirrored in Logan's face.

You know I want you
It's not a secret I try to hide

"I feel the same way, I really do."

"Then why are you trying to push me away?"

Janus wanted to look down, to hide away, but he knew he couldn't. Not anymore.

"I..."

But I can't have you
We're bound to break and my hands are tied

Janus took a breath and pointed to the exit of the circus tent. "Logan Brown, I want you to get out."

"Janus-" Janus nearly took back what he'd said at the hurt in Logan's voice.

"I said I want you to get out, Logan. Leave me alone."

Logan looked like he was about to say something but nodded instead, the fight going out of his eyes. He nodded again and turned on his heel, leaving the tent.

This did not make up for what I wrote last chapter, I'm SoRrY! REALLY SORRY! SORRY!!! Anyway, people keep saying that this is a Prinxiety song and I can totally see that but this book has been nearly all Prinxiety and... Loceit works too.
Bye,
Blaize