Warnings: anxiety attacks and a bit of a sensory overload description? I believe that's the right term

Feel free to leave me more requests in the comments. I can't promise I'll get around to them all but I need stuff to work on when my anxiety gets bad, and it's been getting very very bad lately,so I'd very much appreciate it.

I don't think I mentioned this here yet but you should go check out The 12 Dates of Christmas up on my page! It's a Royality book and a sequel to Christmas Competition, and I'm very proud of it! Unfortunately it wasn't finished on time because of some family things that came up which caused me to travel to another state very suddenly, but it will be finished soon, and most of the chapters are up! I hope you consider checking it out.

Everything was just too much.

Virgil was hyper aware of every little thing that happened in their small apartment today. The blaring sounds of the football game and consequential yelling from a floor below them. A neighbors pet bird shrieking every few moments because his owner wasn't there to show him attention. The loud music from above accompanied by the loud stomping of feet, presumably due to someone dancing. In another apartment there was the shouting of an arguing couple, angry and loud and overwhelming just like everything else. It was too much, he couldn't focus on a single thing but instead rapidly switching between everything, not even able to hear what was happening in his own apartment building with how loud everyone else was being.

The noises were drowning out any other possible sensation, preventing him from being able to calm down. He couldn't use the trick his best friend Logan had taught him for grounding himself when he was anxious-that was meant for pulling him out of his head and into the present to focus on his sensations. Right now he was dealing with the opposite problem of being far too focused on his senses and not being able to stop experiencing them.

Virgil found himself rising from his desk suddenly, the scraping of his chair against the hardwood floors sounding just like nails on a chalkboard in his current state, making him cringe and stiffen uncomfortably. He stalked out of his and Patton's shared bedroom, snagging his headphones on the way out and heading towards the back balcony with urgency.

The cold was biting as he stepped outside in a thin sweater Patton had bought for him, but Virgil welcomed it. The sudden harsh sensation was already helping him to ignore the loudness he had left behind, and this only improved when he slipped the headphones on over his ears. He didn't play any music but kept them on, the device helping to block out some of the noises from before. Now that he was away from the loudness Virgil drew in a gasping breath, only then starting to realize that he had been holding it.

His chest ached as the cold air traveled into his lungs, not feeling any warmer when he blew the breath back out. It was still a much more welcome feeling than before. The cold was keeping him from paying any attention to the fact that he could still hear people if he tried to listen for them, keeping him from panicking any further. He drew in more painfully cold breaths of air, filling his lungs with ice and blowing it back out almost just as cold.

After some time of standing out there (Virgil had no clue exactly how long), the door opening behind him caused him to wince. He felt his boyfriend Patton approach and set a warm hand on his shoulder, rubbing a circle there. "You'll get cold if you stay out here too long, angel."

"Don't feel like going in yet," Virgil mumbled, hand clasping the balcony railing as if Patton were going to pull him inside. He still didn't look at Patton when he stepped closer beside of him, even when he could practically sense the frown that was on his lips.

"Is something wrong?"

"No," Virgil snapped quickly, pulling his arm away and standing closer to the railing. "I'm fine, don't worry about it."

"Oh," Patton frowned, taking a step away from Virgil. "I... well, I'm sorry. Just, please don't stay out too long... I don't want you to get sick."

Virgil felt a pang if regret hitting him as he heard Patton turn to go, but he couldn't find it in him to say anything. He couldn't apologize or even think of heading back into that apartment right now, not like this. He buried his face in his hands, elbows against the balcony railing and tried not to shed any tears that had gathered in his eyes.

It took a while of sitting outside in the biting air before Virgil felt he was ready to go back inside and face his boyfriend. He found Patton in the kitchen, cleaning a spot on the counter that was already clean, like he always did when he was worried or upset. Virgil frowned, not liking to be the cause of Patton's bad feelings.

"Pat?" He spoke softly, almost hoping Patton might not hear. He did hear though, turning his head quickly to meet Virgil's, still looking concerned for him. Virgil looked to the ground instead of at his boyfriend. He had every right to be angry at Virgil for snapping and yet Patton still just worried about how he was doing. He loved his boyfriends kind and forgiving nature but he knew there were times that Patton shouldn't be so forgiving. Virgil was in the wrong here, and he hadn't even apologized yet before Patton was pretending that nothing happened.

"I'm really sorry." Virgil choked on his last word, surprised at the emotion in his voice. He hadn't intended on crying once he had gotten inside and yet there the tears were, brimming in his eyes and hoping to slide down his cheeks. "I shouldn't have snapped at you. You didn't deserve that at all, I don't know why I did that... I love you, I've just had a bad day and it's not an excuse but I was feeling overwhelmed and I just-just-it just came out!"

"It's okay, Virgil," Patton said quickly, stepping out of the kitchen to be closer to his boyfriend. "I know you didn't mean it. Thank you for apologizing."

"Can I...?" Virgil pointed between himself and Patton and then opened up his arms nervously. Patton smiled wide, stepping closer and taking Virgil into his arms happily. Virgil tucked his head into his chest, arms wrapped tightly around his chest, a few tears ending up on Patton's shirt. Patton wrapped one arm over Virgil's shoulders, other hand carding through his hair gently and soothingly. Patton felt the cold sigh of air Virgil let out, relaxing significantly now that he was in his boyfriends arms.

"You're the best person I could ever have in my life. Can I just hug you forever?" Virgil mumbled, making Patton smile.

"If you're wanting to keep hugging for that long then can I make a suggestion?" Patton asked, running his hands through Virgil's hair one more time before stepping back to see his face. Virgil nodded his head slowly. "Why don't you go lay down with some comfy blankets and pillows, and I'll be right there in just a second. Sound okay?"

Virgil frowned a little, shifting from foot to foot.

"I'll be back to lie down with you very quickly, I promise." Patton assured, and finally Virgil agreed. He squeezed Patton tightly one more time before letting him go and heading back to their room to lay in bed and wait.

Virgil stared up at the ceiling in silence while he was alone. He could still hear people being loud but it wasn't all he had to focus on anymore. Instead he found himself focusing on sliding his hand up and down on the soft blanket that lay on their bed, the way he sank down into the mattress that remembered his shape. He focused mostly on the sound coming from his own apartments kitchen though, wondering what Patton was doing out there.

It didn't take long for him to get his answer when Patton came back with a cup of water and two cookies, giving them to Virgil as he climbed in on the other side of the bed. "Make sure you drink and eat some. I know attacks are draining, I don't want you to fall asleep without having anything."

"Thanks, Pat." Virgil muttered, curling up close to his boyfriend as he settled down in the bed. Patton grinned and held him closer, legs entangling beneath warm blankets.

"Y'know I'd do anything for you, angel." Patton assured him, pressing a kiss to his forehead as he ate the cookies given to him. He then pressed another to his cheek, his chin, his hair, hand back to carding through Virgil's hair. Virgil was practically melting from all of the affection from his boyfriend who wanted nothing more than to make sure he felt better.

And there, curled up with the person who he loved and who loved him, Virgil felt like he could handle anything. Nothing was too much for him to get through when he had Patton right there with him, to hold him and guide him.

Virgil was happy.

Sorry if this wasn't awesome lol, I also accidentally ended up using this to vent about my own anxiety attack earlier, whoops ahaha, but I hope you found it cute.

Also I asked for these to write so I could make myself feel better but to be honest now I just miss my girlfriend even more and want to hug her really bad. Though to be fair I've been thinking this way all day cause I love her and can't wait to talk to her again and to see her.

I'll try and get other things done tomorrow or sometime but I make no promises for anything to do with uploading here bc of personal stuff I'm dealing with(And by the way, for a few certain people, personal means I don't want to share and also definitely does not mean that you're allowed to go harass my girlfriend to find out either, thanks). I'm going to go to bed now though, because I'm very tired. Thanks for reading his. *moxiety brings you a ring pop* (yes that's all my creativity can do today I'm sorry) Take care of yourselves. Bye-Bob