(trigger warning for this chapter, mention of s*c*de, bl**d, Remus angst, unsympathetic Patton, Roman, and Virgil sympathetic Janus)
Janus talks in lies still, lies will look like *this*

Logan x Remus (also some Demus but less romantic more parental platonic) based on the song "Achilles come down" and a TikTok I saw of Remus finally giving up after being constantly hurt by the light sides everyone has their breaking point and Remus was pushed far past his and can't take it anymore, this will be less shippy but Logan and Remus are dating and have been for years. Also, Janus was accepted so Remus is alone in the dark mind palace

Remus' POV 

Another day of just trying to be with Logan, but no. I can't even step through the gate to the light mind. The moment I stepped foot in the Light mind palace Roman immediately tried to freaking kill me, Patton was screaming for me to leave, Virgil told me to just die, Janus tried to stop them and so did Logan but the didn't listen and forced me back into the cold dark that is my mind palace. I'll try again later. 

- a few hours later -

I was making my way back to the Light side's mind palace, I needed Logan right now, I really just, need someone to talk to. I can't be alone anymore, not now at least, you see being Thomas's intrusive thoughts means I'm all his intrusive thoughts, the ones about murder, the ones about sex, and the depressive ones, the suicidal ones, the thoughts screaming at him to hurt though I do all I can to keep them away from Thomas which in term makes me struggle with then 10 fold normally Janus would help me and when Logan and I started dating he helped me when I needed it but the others never liked it to them, I could die and they won't care. I soon make it to the gateway to the light side of the mind, a white door that shines like a million stars the light from it almost blinding in the inky black darkness of the dark side of the mind. I hesitate a second before taking hold of the door, I really don't want to be yelled at and attacked again all I want is to be held by Logan and told it will be oka from Janus even if it was a lie. 

I open the door and walk through, nothing yet, I start to look for Janus or Logan. Soon enough I run into Patton whose smile drops to an annoyed scowl the moment he sees me. I brace myself for the insults and yelling that's about to come my way, why could I not be lucky one time in my entire existence.

"Why are you here again? none of us want you around here. Thomas doesn't either. can't you just leave" He says forcing a smile at the end

"um, sorry" I start, why is my voice so small "I just... I need to see Janus or Logan please, ill be gone soon I just, I need them."

"there too busy to see you right now, I'm sure you can deal with it yourself, and if not oh well, sorry I guess. It's not like anyone here cares about you anyways honestly were all better off without your crazy, disgusting self anyways Remus," he says, saying my name as if it physically made him sick to say. I wince a bit. 

"th-they do care, I really need to see them. Logan and Janus always told me I could interrupt if it was another episode and this is, and it's a bad one" I try to explain but he starts to laugh.

"that's why you're here, why would they care about an attention seeker like you. but whatever I guess, though they don't give a crap about you. Maybe you should listen to what you are being told this time. 'Cuz let me guess it another "depressive" episode huh? maybe you should just off yourself, save us all the bother of seeing you again. None of us will miss you" He says laughing again as he walks away and I stay there a minute before looking down and going to Logan's room, knocking much softer than I normally would.

"come in" I hear as I walk in, Janus sitting on Logan's bed and Logan typing something out. They must have been talking

or he's cheating, who'd want to be with you anyways

"Sorry to bother you, I just need to talk. Please" I say and they both look at me quickly. Logan immediately comes over and pulls me in a gentle hug and Janus comes over next to him gently holding my hand.

"First off, you don't bother us ever. Second, another episode?" Logan asks calmly, I only nod and hug him close. He pets my hair and Janus rubs my palm. I relax in their touch a bit. 

"what did I do to get everyone to hate me so much? All I did was my job, what I was born to do. I-i don't get why everyone but you two hate me so much, even my own brother wants me dead, my old best friend and someone I saw as a father even though he's always hated me and loved Roman more, why do I have to be the unloved brother? What did I do wrong, was me just being made wrong?" I ask, voice strangely soft, it normally was when I was upset or trying to stay hidden. Jan gives my hand a gentle squeeze and I give one back.

"You did nothing wrong, Remus, I *can* tell you why they don't like you and I'm sorry they don't but Logan and I are *never*here for you," Janus says I want to believe its just the fact that he talks in lies which is why what he said sounded so backwards, I just nod. I had to have done something for them to hate me so much. Logan just held me closer as I lean into him a bit more and look at Janus with the 'hug please' look and he joins the hug, the both of them holding me. I almost felt better until I hear a knock at Logan's door.

"Logan, I have the next script so I'm comin' in," Roman says opening the door, pausing, sees me and the rest was a blur. Logan and Janus were pushed tp the side, I was against Logans wall the tip of a sword against my neck and Roman was yelling, Logan and Janus trying to get him away. 

"WHY ARE YOU, HERE AGAIN, YOU SORRY EXCUSE FOR A SIDE AND BROTHER. JUST LEAVE ALREADY AND I DONT EVEN MEAN THE LIGHT SIDE I MEAN IN GENERAL. WE ARE ALL SO TIRED OF SEEING YOUR SORRY ASS HERE SO JUST LEAVE AND DONT COME BACK, AND I WON'T LET YOU STAY HERE GO BACK TO THE DARK SIDE WHERE SCUM LIKE YOU BELONGS. JUST A FUCKING MISTAKE OF A SIDE. JUST FADE ALREADY-" he screams, the room just about shaking as I feel tears come to my eyes.

"maybe I will, I'm sorry Logan, I'm sorry Janus. goodbye, Roman. goodbye Logan, bye Janus." I say with a sad smile as I sink down the tip of Roman's sword cutting my neck a bit but not enough for it to do anything but sting. 

"wait what, Remus-" I hear Roman call as I sink out then yelling from Logan and Janus

I rise back up in my side of the imagination morbid creatures around me as I sit on the roof of the dark palace, the 'dark sides' house, a tall dark castle made of obsidian and dark stones and woods, it was pretty beautiful for something I've made. a dark forest surrounded the tall castle. Dark-wood trees with thick canopies of leaves and winding branches made up most of it. creatures with far too many limbs or too many eyes or limbs in the wrong spot walked around. the creepy, morbid creatures I created. the dark seaweed green grass, almost black in colour due to the shadows of the leaves above, covered the ground around me. Air frigid surrounded making a small shiver run up my back. I dangle my legs over the edge of the roof, so tall if I fell I'd die. Which is what I want, right? To give the others what they want, me dead. Thomas would have to worry about me anymore, Janus and Logan could get together after I die so they'll be okay soon. Patton would be happy that Thomas is just that much better without me, Virgil would probably laugh and spit on my body, he really hates me and I don't even know why. I never did anything to him. I hear see Logan and Janus run into the dark imagination from the light side and over to the dark palace.

"Remus please don't," Janus says as he and Logan make it up to the roof a bit away from me," Janus says

"I want to Jan-Jan," I say, when did my voice sound like that? Why is it so soft and monotone? 

" Remus, please come here, won't you get up off, get up off the roof." Logan starts 

"you're scaring us, both of us, we both love you. Remus, please look at the proof" Janus says as they take a step close, I turn slightly to watch legs kicking off the edge. One wrong move and I'm dead.

"I just want them to be happy. Thomas is better off you both can be together, its better anyways for you then being with me Logan, No one else will miss me, my own brother told me to fade, to die. So might as well listen, yeah? Get rid of the monster everyone hates so much, maybe then I could be the hero like my brother, be loved by everyone for just one second." I say turning back to look outwards. looking down at the ground below me where a squirrel with far too many legs scurried around.

"Remember the pact of our youth, where you go I'm going. So if you jump I'm jumping. Since there is no me without you." Logan and Janus say slowly walking next to me, about a foot away. 

"But you can't leave, Thomas needs you, the others need you," I say turning back, tears found their way down my cheeks at some point.

"Thoma needs all of us, including you. we will figure out what to do with the others later but id rather do that with you Rem than without you. I don't want to lose you. I love you, Remus, we both care about you so much." Logan says holding a hand out for 

"solider on Remus, Remus come on, won't you get away, away from the edge. cant we get up off, get up off this roof." Janus says also holding a hand out for me. I turn fully to look at them, my back facing outwards, slightly off the edge.

"I don't want to be alone anymore, I don't want to be hurt anymore for doing what I was born to do, I love you both too much I'm so tired of everyone hurting me, of being alone, of being hated. It would be so much easier to just. Leave, I don't want to leave you both though but I'm so tired of hurting. I, I think I need help like really need help" I say as I actually think about what I'm planning to do. I'm planning to really leave.

"Loathe the way they light the candles in the light side but love the sweet air of votives. you can hurt and be scared but you don't have to suffer alone, we're right here and we aren't going anywhere Remus, but in order for us to help you need to move away from the edge. Please, Remus. We don't want to lose you. We can talk and help. Please let us help." Logan and Janus practically beg and I scoot away from the edge a bit, closer to them. slowly. very slowly until I found myself in their arms being held like their lives and mine depended on it which it might have at that moment. Let's just say we all cried at that moment and we talked. I'm so thankful they got there before I followed through. I'm glad they talked me out of jumping. 

"thank you" I whisper. 

"of course, let's get down from here and try to figure out what we can do to help okay?" Logan asked and I nod. "okay," He says helping me up, we all end up in Janus' room(with the door locked) on his bed and we all talked for what felt like days, it was only a few hours before I was finally calmed down again and soon I had fallen asleep with them both.

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sorry that ending kinda really sucks, i wrote this all in one sitting so i finished it and spent like 3 hours on it. its 1:21 a.m and i have to be up at 1 for work so i kinda had to end it, i might do a part two. let me know if you want that anyways.

hope you all enjoyed have an amazing day/night/morning/afternoon/etc.. peace out guys,gals and non-binary pals. Goodbye everyone

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