Feelings
Logan hated feeling things.
It was irrational, it was irritating, and it only got in the way.
He wasn't mad to feel things.
He was Logic, and Logic doesn't have feelings.
There's a reason it's called cold hard Logic, after all.
The worst part was that he had begun to feel new things, as if his old feelings weren't enough.
The things seemed to cycle around Patton, so he avoided him.
It made them somehow worse, and he wanted to be around Patton.
He refused to do so, seeing as it made his effectiveness go down.
He began to look for a way to no longer feel.
On a human, this would have been impossible, seeing as one of their major components is an emotional center.
On a side that wasn't Morality, it was moderately easy to believe possible.
He asked around in the admin of Thomas's mind.
There are two different side-like beings that exist; Traits and Sides.
Traits can be parts of Sides, and they can evolve into Sides over time.
He first asked one of his Traits, Knowledge.
Knowledge was unsure, so he went to ask Intelligence.
On the way, he literally ran into Patton.
He began to experience PVCs, or Premature Ventricular Contractions, commonly known as 'a heart skipping a beat' he felt the blood cells in his face open wide, warming his face and turning it red. Patton appeared to suffer the same condition, which made Logan wonder if they were sick.
He saw how close he and the other side were, and the cells in his face widened even more.
His face was only a few inches away from the emotional one's. He began to pull away, but before he did, his eyes flicked to Patton's lips without his control. They looked so soft, and he wanted to touch them.
He almost reached out his hand but got himself in control just in time.
This was why he needed to find a way to block his emotions. But Patton...
No matter. He disentangled himself with the fallen Patton and began to walk away. Patton could handle himself.
"Logan?"
He turned back to the fatherly figure, to find him getting up.
"Yes?"
"Um..." Patton turned redder. "I'm sorry for running into you."
This did not appear to be what he actually wanted to say, but Logan dismissed it.
"I'm sorry as well."
He turned back and continued on his way.
He found Intelligence reading a book.
"Do you know how I could block my ability to feel emotions?"
Intelligence looked up, brown eyes analyzing Logan.
"There's an emotional center in Thomas's mind palace. In it, there is a kind of control room, which has the files containing the information you seek."
Logan thanked him and continued on his way.
He found the files, gleaned the information, and headed to find the 'Side room'. It was where he could achieve his goal.
He headed in, marveling at the vast library that filled the space.
A shelf of boxes had 'Memories', a row of books had 'Knowledge' and a family tree graced the wall.
Patton was the father of everyone.
He headed towards the back and found a sorter that had a bag in it. The sorter said 'Emotions'. It was what Logan was looking for.
He opened the bag to find a glass sphere.
When he touched it, it showed a picture of words.
"Logan Sanders, this is the emotional center of all of the sides. You have accessed it, and as such, may adjust your emotional levels, and the level of emotional control you have over Thomas. Do you wish to proceed?"
He clicked a 'yes' button that appeared, and the screen changed.
"To access your own emotions, simply click on this button. To access your emotional effect on Thomas, click on this one. You may change these, but beware of the effects of doing so."
He wasn't sure what the effects were, but he clicked on the button for his own emotions.
"You have accessed your emotions. Drag the circle on the bar shown to change your emotional level. Note: This is different for each side."
He saw the bar. He was at 30% emotion. Interesting, considering he had never accessed this before. It must be his natural level.
He dragged it up to 50, as a test.
Suddenly, he desperately wanted to find Patton, and he was also really confused.
He almost left the sphere but remembered the task at hand.
He dragged it down to 20.
Immediately, his head cleared, and he began to think like never before, almost devoid of emotion.
He realized that what he had just felt classified as feelings for Patton. He had a crush on Patton.
Good thing he was doing this, then.
The bar showed a small line at 30%, that read 'natural level'. He nodded and dragged the bar down to 0%.
He set the glass ball down gently after closing out of the windows and continued back to his room.
He didn't feel anything, just empty.
He reached his room and sat on his bed.
He didn't want to do anything.
His book was beside the bed on his table, but the plot was suddenly crystal clear.
He knew the likely ending and the second-most likely ending from the information his head already contained in the book.
It was that easy to predict it. He also knew that he should have felt happy at that aspect of blocking his emotions, but he simply felt nothing.
e sat on his bed for over an hour before Patton called him to lunch.
Knowing he used to have a crush on Patton, he figured that he would've blushed had Patton done this two hours ago, but he simply got up and walked into the dining room.
Roman was flirting with Virgil as usual, and Logan could tell that they were already in love, even if they didn't know yet.
Patton had made Spaghetti and Meatballs with broccoli.
Logan ate just the perfect amount; enough to get the necessary nutrients and materials, but not too much to delay his efficiency or overfill him.
Patton and Roman ate too much, while Virgil ate practically nothing.
"Virgil, you have not consumed enough sustenance to properly fuel your body. You may wish to eat some more."
He looked at Logan oddly but did not reach for more.
"I repeat, you have not consumed the required amount of sustenance. Consuming more would be healthy."
Virgil rolled his eyes. "Why do you care, mom?"
Logan supposed that Logan 1.0 may have been insulted or confused, but Logan 2.0 simply continued.
"You have not consumed the optimal amount of food for your health, and it could negatively affect Thomas. I am not female, and thus, Mom is not a proper title for me."
Patton gave him a weird look. Curious. "Logie, are you feeling alright, Kiddo?"
"I am operating at maximum capacity. I am, as lesser developed creatures may call it, "fine"."
Patton shrugged and continued eating.
Logan got up and washed his dish before heading out.
He could have told Roman and Patton that they were eating too much, but they would not have listened, and that contrasts the purpose.
The next few weeks continued as such, and soon all the other sides ignored his input.
Logan 1.0 would have felt hurt, but Logan 2.0 simply did not care.
One day, something odd happened.
Patton knocked on his door, and Logan let him in.
His face was red, and Logan could see he was breathing oddly.
"Patton, are you 'alright'?"
Patton nodded and opened his mouth. He then closed it with a sigh.
"Is there anything you need?"
The side smiled.
"Um... I just wanted to... tell you something?"
Logan resisted the urge to correct his questioning tone.
"What is it?"
"Um... I like you. Romantically."
Logan already knew this. He was not sure how to respond.
He didn't say anything and watched Patton's face appear disheartened.
"Do you... like me?"
"Patton, I blocked my emotional sensors. I do not experience emotion. So no, I do not like you."
Patton looked like he was about to cry.
"How did you do that?"
"I simply turned my emotions off."
Patton looked down, and in a sudden move, reached and grabbed Logan's face.
He brought it to his own and kissed Logan.
Logan did not kiss back or feel anything different.
"You... you don't feel anything... do you?"
Patton started crying.
"No. I told you, I no longer feel emotion."
Patton broke down in tears, and Logan watched.
"You know, I really thought you might have liked me. You used to act all... tough and emotionless, and I knew that was a lie, but now... I don't think it was..." Patton was sobbing into the jacket Logan had given him all that time ago.
Logan remembered how he had felt when he had, all hopeful and desperate. He used to love Patton, even if he didn't know it.
Now... Patton was just a foolish side.
Who was crying on his bed.
So... Logan just sat there, and eventually, Patton left.
He almost felt bad for that. No, he didn't. He didn't want anything, and he didn't feel anything, and it was going to stay that way.
(Patton)
Patton ran away from the room crying. He'd finally admitted it, and he got turned down.
He finally admitted that he liked the one side he never thought would like him, and he was right.
Logan is just an emotionless side.
He collapsed on his bed, and just let it all out.
He'd loved Logan for years, and there had even been some signs that Logan liked him back.
That one day... where they had fallen, and Logan was blushing.
That was his biggest sign.
In fact, after that, Logan had acted weird. And then the weird became normal, and that was the way he had always acted.
Patton thought back to it, and realized that that was the night everything changed.
That was when it seemed like Logan wasn't emotional.
He remembered the way Logan had run. It was a direction they usually don't go, towards the Trait Intelligence.
Patton looked at his tear-streaked hands.
He just wanted his pain to end. The pain of not being liked back.
So he headed out that way, hoping he would soon be able to block his own emotions.
Intelligence told him of the room, and in no time, Patton was looking at the glass sphere.
He lightly touched it, and text filled the view.
"Patton Sanders, you have accessed the emotional center for all of the sides. You are Morality and have control over all of the side's emotion levels and impact on Thomas. Do you wish to continue?"
Patton didn't know what to do, so he hesitantly clicked 'Yes'.
The screen showed more text.
"To access the sides emotions, simply click on this button. To access the sides emotional effect on Thomas, click on this one. You may change these, but beware of the effects of doing so."
Patton clicked on the Side's emotions, and the screen showed 7 blinking bars, one for each of the sides.
Roman's emotional level was at 90%, Virgil's was 70%, Patton's was 100%, Janus's was 60%, Remus's was 90%, one was shrouded in mist, (I'm holding out for an orange side, people) and Logan's showed his draggy-circle thing at 0% and a line at 30% that read 'natural level'.
Patton dried to drag his own, but it wouldn't let him.
"Note: Morality's emotional level is permanently set, seeing as he has the most effect on Thomas."
Patton sighed. His mission was a failure.
He saw that he could move the other side's bars, and he got an idea.
He looked at Logan's. It was wrong to tinker with it, but Logan wasn't happy the way he was. He couldn't be happy if he didn't feel anything.
Patton dragged it back up to 30%. He considered going a bit higher, but that was Logan's choice, not his.
He smiled as he watched the glowing bar re-fill, and closed off.
The last screen showed "We love you, Morality! -the emotions"
He smiled and walked out of the room. He needed to talk to Logan.
"Logan?" He asked when he got back to the Mind.
Logan was sitting in his favorite armchair, reading a book. It had been so long since he had seen Logan do that that Patton smiled.
"Logan. I'm so sorry! I moved your emotion bar back up to its natural 30% level! Is that ok?"
Logan looked up from his book.
Patton blushed at the intensity of his eyes and desperately wanted to run. He was scared, and he felt so guilty.
"Patton..." Logan set the book down and walked closer.
Before Patton knew it, Logan was hugging him.
"Thank you. Before you did that, I never could've done this."
And he kissed the shocked Patton right on the lips. Patton blushed, and kissed him back.
It was perfect.
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