Tw: self harm implications

he sat in his room.
just being alone and with his thoughts
he tried very hard to do his job successfully and to not let the stress get to him.
but with deceit and remus trying to get him to break down and to return to the darksides, it was becoming more and more difficult.
he felt like he was DROWNING.
he felt the pressure on his chest and lungs.
he was unable to breathe properly.
there was no one to save him.
no one to help him out of the crashing waves of sea and dark ocean that he was in.
no one to stop them from shouting words of degradation at him that would leave a lasting mark on his work and his self esteem.
he was being pushed and pulled in and out of darkness.
not knowing when the next wave would come and crash down on him, sending him in a whirlpool of bubbles and emotions.
he would have daily panic attacks after one or both of the mentioned sides would "check in" on him.
right now was right after one of their "check ins"
virgil was underwater.
he was DROWNING in his own thoughts.
he was just thinking about everything they said and how it was all true

No one loves you

Except us

Come back to us

They don't care about you

We are your family

they made a convincing point.
they were the ones he first ran to.
and they took care of him for years until he went to the light sides.
but he thought about all that had happened while he's been with patton, roman, and logan.
all of the good memories.
all of the debates he and logan had.
all the cookies he and patton baked.
all of the Disney movies he and roman.

but all of that was gone now.
now that the darksides were here.
he felt nothing but pain.
and horror.
and numb.
he just wanted it to stop.
he wanted to feel normal again.

and when he wanted to feel normal?
he brought out the...
special...
box in the back of the cabinet
and does

one

two

too many

and then he feels the darkness start to settle in and he feels that panic arising.
and he's back in the sea.
the raging ocean.
the ocean that he's DROWNING in.

then,
when he thought he couldn't be more alone,
the darkness surrounded him and the floor ate him.

and now he wasn't in pain.

(418 words)

Alright this is derived from a prinxiety idea I had that I will most likely do later but for now take this kind of bad one shot that I rushed to write.

I do think it's almost calming to read to me. I don't know if I should take that as good or bad... But I'm halfway done with this angst train sooooooooooo... yeah

Anyways!
I will most likely be back to writing prinxiety soon but I may continue writing logince since I really liked doing that.

Stay happy and healthy!

Hope you have a wonderful day/night, lovelies!

-Skye