Basically, this is that one AU where they're all friends, things are exaggerated for videos and they all actually get along okay? Okay

Warnings: Mentions of violence, mention of corpses and bones, there's nothing graphic in this one but lmk if I need to add anything!

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Patton needed to find Roman, wanting to ask him if Roman could help him bake. None of the other sides wanted to/were busy with other tasks. So after checking the entire mind palace and not finding Roman, he left to the one place Roman could be.

The Imagination.

The door to the Imagination opened up on two paths. One was towards Roman's land, a magnificent castle standing in the distance(Patton found it odd it was black, but it did make the castle look more dramatic, so he guessed that's what Roman was going for) and the other was Remus's land, which made Patton shudder even glancing at it, seeing the piles of either corpses or bones.

He walked along the path to Roman's castle. The path finally shifted away from Remus's domain, the ground becoming littered with vibrant flowers being tended to by villagers. A few did a double-take when Patton strolled by, before shaking their heads and getting back to work. No one made an attempt to stop or talk to Patton, and he didn't want to disrupt their concentration.

Finally, Patton arrived at the castle. One of the guards stopped Patton on his way, briefly giving Patton a once over and frowning at the other guard. The other shrugged.

"His Majesty said this one was the bubbly dad of them. I doubt he'd mind."

"You don't have weapons, do you?"

Patton shook his head. The guards exchanged another glance, before stepping out of Patton's way.

"Make sure to get all the mud off your shoes before you go too far in though, his Majesty doesn't like the floors being dirty."

Patton beamed. "Alright! Um, where can I find his uh... His Majesty?" Patton asked just as he passed them. The first guard that had stopped him pointed down the long, seemingly never-ending hallway. "Should be in the throne room, it's the tenth door down this hallway and on the right."

"Thank you!" Patton chirped before walking further into the castle(after wiping his shoes- it made sense Roman wouldn't want mud in his beautiful castle). He followed the guard's instructions, counting the doors as he walked by. Patton was surprised by the paintings on the wall though- all depicted battlefields or executions or weird creatures he had never seen. Patton shook his head. Roman did enjoy a good dramatic final battle. Maybe that's what all those were.

Patton pushed open the tenth door on his left, and it swung open easily. He stopped in his tracks though when he saw Remus on the throne, not Roman, and the Dragon Witch sitting on the floor nearby reading some scrolls to Remus, reports or sounded like.

Remus looked away from his advisor at the sound of the door and his face lit up. "Patton! I didn't expect to see you here!" Remus jumped out of his seat and the dragon witch rolled her eyes. "What brings you here anyway?"

"Um- I was looking for Roman? Why are you here and not him?"

Remus tilted his head. "This is my kingdom, I kinda need to run it."

Patton furrowed his brow. "What?"

"Yeah! It's my kingdom! Roman rules the other land." Remus suddenly gasped. "Oh my God! I need to show you around! You've never been to the Imagination, have you? Well, when Roman and I are in our separate kingdoms at least. I should check up on what he's doing- Hey Hope!"

Remus turned back to the dragon witch as she finished cleaning up her scrolls. She raised a brow. "Can you let Roman know I'm bringing Patton over after I show him my kingdom, or maybe send Kyle over if you have other things? I know he can handle the stuff Roman's been playing with."

Hope grimaced slightly. "I think I'll send Kyle." As she left, she smiled warmly at Patton and Remus. "Have fun touring the kingdom." And then she was gone down the hall.

"Wait- you're telling me- so that... Um. How do I not be mean about the other land?" Patton asks, growing very hesitant and nervous. He didn't want to insult the other land.

Remus shrugged. "I don't think you can be mean. Roman works very hard over there! We had a sort of agreement that if I gave him ideas he'd leave my kingdom alone, and it gave me an outlet for my thoughts."

Patton nearly sighed in relief. Nearly. "So those are your ideas?"

"Yep! Well, most of them. I know Roman comes up with a few by himself when he's frustrated. I don't like acting on them though."

"Why not?" Patton followed Remus out of the throne room, taking in how Remus looked a bit more regal here than he did in the mind palace. "I mean, I don't want to be rude, but uh... I figured you would be all for torturing and murdering creatures?"

Remus shook his head, opening a door further down the hall and waiting for Patton to go inside first. He did, and Remus closed the door to the garden once he entered.

"I would never harm anything! Not intentionally. I can't help my intrusive thoughts. I had to accept that." He let Patton explore the massive garden as he spoke. "Plus, the people here are my creations! My children! It'd be as if you murdered one of us sides!"

Patton shuddered at the thought. "My point exactly," Remus said, before shrugging. "Besides, Ronan is still Roman. You finding out that his kingdom is actually the more gruesome of us two shouldn't change your opinion of him."

"I don't think of him differently!" Patton whipped his head around at the slight accusation. "I just..."

"Didn't think Roman had it in him?"

Patton hummed, nodding. "I didn't expect it. He was always so.... So... Harmless, I think? Like, he wouldn't actually hurt one of us? Or Thomas."

Remus frowned, leaning on a hedge. "He wouldn't hurt either of you. Sure, sometimes he'll grind up a figment that looks like one of us other sides into a smoothie or toss us in a wood chipper, but those are all figments of the imagination to relieve his stress. He still comes up with his normal, boring as fuck fairy tales, but he can like testing out my ideas if he wants."

Patton took a moment to soak in Remus's words.

"You're certain he won't hurt us? Even if you say something about us getting hurt?"

"Absolutely. You're talking to the pure honest side, Patton. I wouldn't lie to you about Roman." Remus glanced up at the few storm clouds starting to form. "Maybe I should get Kyle and tell him to let Roman know another day. I don't think you could actually handle seeing the stuff in there just yet."

Patton hugged himself. "Not really."

"Okay one sec."

Remus summoned what appeared to be another scroll, as well as a normal pen and scribbled something onto the paper before making it vanish.

"What were you doing here anyway? I don't think I asked."

"Oh, uh..." Patton raked his brain. Why had he come here again? "Oh! Right! I wanted to ask Roman if he would help me bake. But if he's busy I can always do it by myself. Unless you wanna help?"

Remus laughed. "Dee banned me from cooking anything for the next century. But if you want help decorating whatever it is you're making, I can help!"

Patton smiled slightly. "So... Do we sink out or do we have to walk all the way back to the Imagination door?"

Remus grinned. "Sink out!" And he flopped backwards, where a hole appeared in the ground and he disappeared. Patton yelped as Remus vanished out of sight, until he heard him call up, "just jump!"

"... Maybe I shouldn't have asked." Patton mumbled, but he jumped anyway. The hole sealed up above his head and he popped back up into the mind palace, his head spinning. Remus was perched on the table already, leaning forward to watch Patton.

"Well chef! Take it away!"