WARNING: SUICIDE ATTEMPT

Roman sat in his room, hands playing with his hair. He sighed in frustration, trying to think of a good idea for a video. He didn't want to let Thomas down, or the others. And, he didn't want to disappoint himself.

When nothing came to mind again, he felt a wave of anger and sadness overlap his emotions. He was mad at himself, and sad that he couldn't think of something. And when he realized he'd get nothing done, he decided to take a warm shower to relax.

He left his room, walking down the hall to the bathroom. He didn't pass by anyone on his way, and he was somewhat grateful for that. When he got into the small bathroom, he looked at himself in the mirror. His hair was messy, and looked very similar to how Thomas' hair looked when Virgil had resigned.

Slowly he got undressed, ignoring the evident scars on his thighs that seemed to get deeper and deeper by every passing day. He made clean clothes appear on the counter and turned on the water, waiting a moment for it to become warm. Once it was warm enough - which was actually a very high temperature, enough to hurt a bit - he stepped in. Roman hissed as the scorching water hit his thighs, seeping into his scars.

Roman suffered through the pain, leaning his head back to let the water run through his hair. He forced his mind to stay away from any negative thoughts, but it was practically impossible for him.

His brain played each hate comment against him through his mind, and he gritted his teeth. "Unoriginal," "Egotistic," "Useless," the list went on. Some he gave himself. He made the water even hotter allowing the pain to take over his mind and distract him. He blamed the pain for the tears.

When Roman got out of the shower, he made a towel appear and dried off. Just as he got to his thighs, he glanced at his drawer. Buried under a bunch of things was a single razor, one that had old and new blood on it. He went back to drying himself off, but before he knew it, he had grabbed the razor from the bottom of the drawer and started digging it deep into his skin.

Roman watched the blood run down his legs, and he heard a knock on the door. "Princey?" Virgil's voice came through the door. It sounded concerned. Roman panicked, and he immediately made the blood disappear with a wave of his hand and hastily put his clothes on, ignoring the sting when cloth rubbed against his new cuts.

He unlocked and opened the door, looking at Virgil and leaning against the door. He was slightly out of breath, and Virgil raised an eyebrow. "You done in there?" He asked, and Roman nodded.

"Y-Yeah, sorry of I took too long," Roman said as he stepped out of the bathroom. Virgil just shrugged, walking in and closing the door. Roman sighed and walked to his room, ignoring his pain. When he got inside, he fell face first onto the bed. He groaned, lifting his head slightly and looking out his window, watching the birds resting in a nest on a branch.

* A few months later *

Roman placed his hands on the sink counter, breathing heavily. Tears streamed from his eyes as he looked at his disheveled reflection. It looked almost as if his reflection was smirking at him. Roman glared, but it was weak. He was weak. He was weak and stupid. Weak and stupid and useless.

Roman cried harder, hanging his head. His hands found his drawer, opening it swiftly. Through his blurred vision, Roman looked through it until he found his razor. It was still the same. Except caked with more blood.

Roman put the razor to his wrist, aligning it with his vain. It was near so many other scars and fresh cuts, always easy to hide. But not this time. Roman sobbed as he pushed down on the blade, from both the pain and voices in his head. But he pushed further, feeling the blood rush down his wrist.

Then he did the same to the other. His strength was already deteriorating; it left with the blood that rushed from his wrists. Roman dropped the razor, still sobbing. His vision started becoming dark, the edges already blurred with black. The voices were stronger than ever, and it seemed like they were laughing at him. Laughing at his weakness; at his stupidity.

Then, he felt his body hit the ground before losing consciousness.

Down in the living room, Virgil heard a loud thud. He jumped, and Patton and Logan looked at one another in confusion. "I'll go see what it is," Virgil said, getting up from the couch. Patton and Logan nodded, Patton going back to baking and Logan studying.

Virgil walked up the steps quickly, making his way to the bathroom, where he assumed the noise had come from. He knocked loudly, saying through the door, "Hey Princey! You okay in there?"

When no response came, Virgil banged on the door. Again, nothing. His attitude changed to one of worry, and he pounded on the door. "Roman! This isn't funny!" And still no response. Virgil got on all fours, and he leaned his head onto the floor. He looked through the small crack under the door, and he nearly threw up.

Blood. There was blood everywhere. And he could see a limp body in the mess of blood. "Patton! Logan!" Virgil yelled as he shoved against the door, attempting to open it. The two traits in question came rushing up the stairs, seeing Virgil in a panic. "Roman, blood, open door," Virgil said between breaths, his heart racing in fear.

Patton and Logan helped Virgil, and in the end they broke the door down. Virgil was the first inside, beside Roman's limp body in seconds. Patton covered his mouth, running to find a phone. Logan crouched beside Virgil to help.

Roman was lying in a pool of his own blood, and Logan put his fingers to Roman's neck. Logan sighed in relief ever so slightly when he felt a pulse. Virgil carefully moved Roman onto his lap, looking up as Patton came back in.

"Ambulance on their way, said we should try to slow the bleeding." He said in a rush, and Logan stood up. Logan opened the mirror cabinet, and with shaking hands, pulled out bandages. He passed them down to Virgil, closing the cabinet and crouching back down.

Virgil carefully took one of Roman's wrist, ignoring how cold Roman's skin felt or how pale it looked. He whipped his eyes with his shoulder before unravelling the bandages, handing one to Logan. They both wrapped one of Roman's wrists, watching as the blood started soaking into them but at a somewhat slower rate.

They could hear the ambulance pull up, and Patton went down to greet them, still flustered. The medics came up and helped bring Roman downstairs before putting him onto a stretcher; carefully putting it back into the ambulance.

~~~

Virgil paced the waiting room nervously, tugging at his hair. The shock had left the three of them, and instead it was replaced by fear, anger, and sorrow. Patton had his head buried in Logan's shoulder, his shoulders shaking as he cried. Logan comforted Patton as best he could while watching Virgil pace.

A nurse walked out of a room, and she looked around before seeing the three. She walked over quickly, and when she spoke her voice was fast. "You are here for Roman, yes?" when she received a nod from Logan and Virgil, Patton only looking at her to listen. "Good news is that he will make it. If you hadn't found him sooner, he might not have." Virgil visibly relaxed. "Bad news is he'll have to stay here under close monitor for a week until he is well enough to go home."

Virgil just nodded in understanding. "Could we go see him?" Patton asked, sniffling as he wiped away his tears. The nurse smiled and nodded.

"Of course, he's in room fourteen." She gestured to the room that she had left, and Logan helped Patton stand.

"Thank you," Virgil said to the nurse before walking with quick steps to Roman's room. The door was ajar, and Virgil pushed it open a bit more. Suddenly his hands were shaking even more, and he felt tense. He glanced at Logan and Patton, who nodded. Taking a deep breath, Virgil walked inside with them.

Inside the room there was only one bed. Ad the bed was occupied by Roman. He looked a mess, and it broke Virgil's heart. Roman looked so fragile, like a single nudge and he'd shatter into a million pieces. His skin was deathly pale, but his chest rose and fell with even breaths. His eyes were closed, but his finger was tapping against the mattress softly, indicating he was awake.

Virgil sat on the edge of Roman's bed, and Roman opened his eyes. They looked so depressed, so dull. Virgil felt his breath catch in his throat, and he averted his eyes to Patton and Logan.

Patton was quick to burst into more tears at the sight of Roman, and he insisted on hugging Roman at least once. Patton hugged Roman lightly, and Roman felt a pang of guilt. Logan sat on Roman's other side, a look of relief on his face.

They sat in silence for about five minutes. Logan finally stood up, bringing Patton with him. "We'll give you time to rest. You need it. Virgil?" Logan looked at Virgil, and Virgil met his gaze.

Virgil coughed slightly. "Yeah, I'll be right there. Just give me a minute." His voice was soft, and Logan nodded. Him and Patton left, leaving just Virgil and Roman. The air was deathly silent, and it felt awkward.

Roman was telling himself how stupid he was for trying it. How he had scared his friends, guilt running through him. And anger at the fact he couldn't even get killing himself right. Roman didn't notice Virgil move closer, tears falling down his face. He didn't notice until a hand took his own, and he jumped from the contact.

Roman looked at Virgil, and he felt tears form in his own eyes at the sight. Virgil ran his thumb on the back of Roman's hands, staring down at Roman's scars. Roman wanted to pull his hand away, but Virgil's warmth was comforting.

Roman watched as Virgil lifted their hands, and felt Virgil's lips press onto his knuckles. Virgil began shaking, holding Roman's hand tightly as he cried silently. Roman frowned and pulled Virgil closer slightly, and Virgil was careful to not break any of the equipment.

"I didn't want to lose you," Virgil whispered, and Roman did begin crying as more guilt plagued him. Virgil sniffled, turning over Roman's hand and looking at the bottom of his wrist. Virgil then looked back up at Roman. "We need you, Roman. I need you."

And with that, Virgil stood up and left before another word could be spoken.

* Five months later *

A knock came from Virgil's door, and Virgil looked up from his phone. "Yeah?"

The door opened, and Roman walked inside. He closed the door behind him, and Virgil could see Roman's shoulders shaking. Virgil held out his arms and Roman walked closer, sitting down on Virgil's bed and cuddling into Virgil. Virgil ran his fingers comfortingly through Roman's hair, kissing the top of Roman's head.

Roman had his face hidden in the crook of Virgil's neck, sobbing his eyes out. He gripped Virgil's jacket tightly, making a wet spot on the hoodie with his tears. Virgil spoke softly, whispering sweet, comforting words to Roman.

After fifteen minutes of this, Roman finally stopped crying. His breath was still uneven, but he had calmed down greatly. Virgil pushed Roman away slightly, taking Roman's hand and leaning down. Virgil pressed his lips to every scar on Roman's right arm, and then did the same to his left. Roman felt himself relax a bit more, and even smiled slightly when Virgil placed a gentle kiss on his lips.

"Better?" Virgil asked, looking into Roman's eyes. Roman nodded, snuggling back up to Virgil. Virgil smiled to himself, holding Roman protectively. They stayed like that for the rest of the night, having moved so they were cuddling under the blankets.