Roman : * falls asleep in Remus' bed *
Remus , after roming back from terrorizing a village: you'd think I'd be mad , but no , I would and have killed for my nocturnal brother .
Remus : but that's not to say I won't lay on top of him because that's my mother fucking bed .
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Deceit: well, I know we've always had this " unspoken rivalry " , but -
Virgil : it's not a rivalry, you're just always really mean to me . And it's not " unspoken ", you talk about it all the time .
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Remy : if you want to be gay or bi , I'll love and accept you .
Remy : unless you're one of them freshmen
Remy: then you can burn in hell .
Remy : I don't hate them because of their sexuality.
Remy : I hate them because they're assholes .
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Patton : you know , for someone who's ace you seem to make an awful lot of dick jokes .
Deceit: well for a gay person you never really seem to be happy .
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Virgil : what is your problem ? Does seeing me fail somehow make you feel better about your sad , miserable life ?
Deceit: it does , 100%
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Deceit: I went into the lounge the other day there was blood all over my new couch .
Patton: which one , the red one ?
Deceit: ...
Deceit: well, it's red now , yeah .
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Logan : in the past it was very common to put soap in children's mouths when they swore . Fortunately, this practice has become much less com-
Remus : soap, huh? Wonder if it'll go good with deodorant...
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Virgil : I yeeted myself out of bed this morning .
Roman : oh worm ? Like , on god ?
Patton : freaking superb you funky little kiddo .
Logan : .... I speak many languages but this isn't one of them .
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Patton , seductively: tell me your wildest fantasy.
Logan : I'm on the wheel of fortune and I spin the wheel so hard it lights on fire .
Patton : n-no , I meant-
Logan : everyone claps .
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Remus : I'm literate and have access to wi-fi , and I can and will make that everyone else's problem.
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