Patton : Logan kisses me .
Remy No! :D
Roman : oh my god ! Oh my god !
Patton : it was unbelievable.
Roman : oh my god ! Oh my god ! Oh my god !
Remy : I know ! Okay , all right . We need to know everything. Roman ,get some wine and unplug the phone .
Roman : okay !
Remy : Patton , does this end well or do we need tissues?
Patton : oh it ended  very well .
Roman: do not start without me! Do not start without me!
Remy : lets talk about the kiss , was it like a soft brush against the lips ? Or was it like a "I gotta have you now " kinda thing ?
Patton : well . At first it was intense and then we just sunk into it .
Remy: okay. So was he holding you ? Or was his hand on your back.
Patton : well first they were on my waist then they were on my hair .
Remy : OH WOW !
Remy : OH WOW!
Roman : oh my god !
[ with Virgil & Logan]
Logan : I kissed Patton.
Virgil: tongue ?
Logan : yeah .
Virgil: cool .

___________________________

Patton : * has already befriended all the teachers and all the new students, probably brought brownies *
Logan : * had pissed off all the teachers by correcting them 8 times each even though it was totally warranted *
Roman : * has gotten 4 girl's numbers already even though he literally yelled " I'm gay goddamnit !" Which prompted him getting at least 4 guy's numbers.*
Virgil : * going through phases of having a panic attack in the corner to wondering just how stupid all his classmates are because damn *
Deceit: * has given each teacher a different name to call him while skipping gym class because " damn straight boys , calm down , this is PE not the hunger games "*

___________________________

Roman : Patton, why is there soy milk in the fridge?
Virgil: oh my god , I'm surrounded by hipsters, if you try to swap pasta for quinoa I swear to god-
Patton : it's for Logan of course. He's lactose intolerant.
Roman : HE IS ?!
Virgil: but wait , I saw him drinking a glass of regular milk this morning !
All three : * turn around to stare at Logan *
Logan :* takes last sip from the milk carton * it's a fight guys .
All three : ...
Logan : you either beat the lactose , or the lactose beats you .
Patton : honey no ...
Roman : that's not how it fucking works !
Virgil : I'm gonna hide all the dairy in the house !!

___________________________

Patton : can I ride you ?
Logan :* chokes * E-excuse me ?
Patton : I asked if I could ride you . I ridden Roman before it's fun !
Logan : wh- wait what ?!
Patton : yeah , he let me climb onto his back and ride him around the house .
Logan : ... you mean a piggyback ride ????
Patton : oh , that's what it's called ?
Logan : YES THAT'S WHAT IT'S CALLED -