June, 2019

"Lukas," she breathed, though I could see she still didn't believe my words.

So I elaborated until she could doubt no more. "I am still captivated by you. So much so, that my last relationship ended because I clearly couldn't forget about you. So much so, that I'm prepared to chase you around Europe on a quest to bring back your dead boyfriend. So much so, that I'd give up my life for you to bring him back if that would make you happy. Despite everything you've put me through, despite the fact you and I are no longer tied to each other by a bond between our hearts, my heart still races when you look at me. I want to spend every second of my day with you even still, and that excites me and terrifies me at the same time. Because every time I've let myself feel this way about you, you've disappeared... So it's not unrequited, okay?"

I finally stopped myself, realising I had revealed too much.

I felt naked.

Bare.

Exposed.

Vulnerable.

Her eyes gave nothing away for the first time, staring at me blankly.

In shock.

Her mouth popped open ever so slightly as she gaped at me.

She asked for the truth... so why won't she say anything?

But then her small, dainty hand reached up, cupping my cheek.

Her thumb stroked its way across my skin, and I felt myself melt into her touch, like it was the only place that felt like home.

"I don't want to be just your friend anymore," she murmured. "I need more."

And before I could respond, the hand that was on my cheek slid around to my neck, holding my head steady as she pushed onto her tiptoes. Then, next I knew, her pressed her lips against mine.

My senses became overloaded, causing me to freeze. Consumed by her watermelon and hibiscus scent and the ever-so-delicate feeling of her plush, moist lips moving against mine, I stayed as still as possible, scared the moment would stop.

All the while, within me, I felt everything start to snap into place. Every knot came undone, each scattered piece of the jigsaw found its way back together, and I felt whole again with her caressing me.

But it was over too quickly.

She pulled back, once again not looking at me. Her cheeks were flushed crimson, and her heart was pounding like she'd run a marathon. "Sorry," she mumbled. "I shouldn't have done that without—"

Though before she could finish, my hands gripped her face and pulled her right back into me, needing more of the tranquillity that her closeness gave me.

Yet this time was different.

This time, as our lips crashed into each other, I felt my body ignite. Those same mended parts of me flared with passion, with ecstasy, with desire.

Her arms were quick to wrap around my neck, and mine dipped to her waist, dragging her impossibly closer to me.

Our tongues took no moment to find each other, in a dance that was all-too-familiar and long-missed.

We ebbed and flowed like waves. Pushing, pulling. Giving, taking. Hands moving over each other in just the way we needed.

And when finally I felt I had just the right amount of fill of her, when all parts of me had been lit up again with the essence of her, I shited back ever so slightly, my forehead resting on hers. "Never apologise for kissing me," I whispered before nudging her nose with mine.

"Duly noted." Then she gave me another peck, before a giggle escaped her.

"So," I sighed, reluctantly pulling back. "I believe you agreed to spend the afternoon with me."

"I did."

"Care to do some sightseeing?" I held out a hand, waiting for her to accept me, slightly wary that at any moment she'd push me away again.

But to my relief, she slipped her hand in mine and pulled herself close to me. "I'll do anything as long as it's with you."

· · ───── ∘☽༓☾∘ ───── · ·

In the space of the afternoon, we had fit in a tour of the Colosseum, the Sistine Chapel, and were now on a bus looking at all the other sights we wouldn't have time to see. And that whole time, we were inseparable. No matter where we went, our hands were locked together, refusing to part for a moment.

Ollie's head rested on mine as we pulled up by the Scalinata della Trinità dei Monti. As the pre-recorded audio guide told us how it had 135 steps and was commissioned by French King Louis XII, she sighed about how she wished today would never end.

And I realised, "Shit! We should find somewhere to stay tonight."

Hand retreating from hers, I fished through my pockets for my phone, and she edged away, a slight pout on her face. Though I could already tell why she was suddenly discontent: it was the first time we had physically separated since our kiss.

Chuckling at her expression, I wrapped my arm around her and pulled her back into me. "Careful. Anyone might think you hate me if you continue to grimace like that."

"As if I ever could," she muttered before wrapping her arms around my waist and snuggling closer into me.

The bus moved to a crawl again, taking us to our final stop: Piazza Barberini.

My phone still sat locked in my hand as another task I had to complete crossed my mind. "I should also book our flights back to London."

She said nothing, head turned down as she gripped me slightly harder.

"I don't know why you're upset about that. Nothing is going to change whether we are here or there. Other than the fact that we can start planning to get rid of the Mades."

She finally loosened her hold, retreating to her side as she glumly replied, "It's just... when people go on holiday, they're more adventurous and forgiving. What if we get back and you... close up to me again?"

The corner of my mouth turned up as I scanned her worried face, relieved to know she cared about losing our moment of bliss just as much as I did. I tucked a lock of her hair behind her ear before I continued, relishing in the way her head nuzzled my hand as I did so. "Sure, being back might inspire us to have the conversations we still need to have about the past. There's still a lot we haven't spoken about that should be addressed if we don't want to hurt each other again. But the hardest part for us is over now, isn't it? We've realised we still like each other and we're back together."

The doubt in her eyes diminished in seconds, replaced instead with relief and delight. "I like the sound of that... us being back together."

I paused, the realisation of what I had declared catching up with me. And while, at the time, I meant it in a more casual sense, her declaration of joy at the thought of our budding relationship eased any further insecurities I had about the state of us.

We were together again, somehow, despite the odds. And there was no need to hide her from anyone to keep her safe. No other person who could get between us. In the end, Ollie was right. We were a three act structure where the third act would see us turn the new leaf.

So I breathed back, "So do I," before placing a peck on her head again.

Her eyes swelled with adoration before she purred, "When are you going to book that room?"

Chuckling, I shifted back to my side of the seat and corrected her with, "Rooms. After I book our flights."

As I unlocked my phone though, Olivia started to complain. "Why rooms?"

"Because... we are two people."

"But we shared a room last night."

"It's a little different now."

"Is it?"

Though rather than responding, my face grimaced as an alert caught my attention, inhibiting me from going any further.

"What's wrong?" she asked, cluing in to my displeasure.

Opening the app, I scrolled through the weather alert further before showing her. "Hot spell tomorrow. Looks like I won't be flying out until the evening."

"We," was all she replied.

I shook my head. "You should go back in the morning."

"Why?"

"Because you'll either be bored sitting in a hotel room all day, or stuck sightseeing on your own."

"There's nothing wrong with me going out on my own."

"There's a lot of shady people in Rome, just waiting for tourists to take advantage of."

"And I'm a mother-fucking fairy who can take on any human who tries to mess with me," she then whispered back, eyes narrowing as she challenged my worry.

I hesitated, wanting to agree with her... though one sight lingered in my mind, countering her claims of strength.

"I don't get it," she said, noticing my deliberation. "Why are you perfectly fine with me taking on a Made or your uncle, but tense up around the thought of me being alone with humans?"

"I've never been okay with you taking on Mades or my uncle... I just know that you have an ultimate weapon against them. As for humans... it's not like you can shock them."

"No... But I do have magic. I might not be a witch with all sorts of spells, but I can shrink down if someone tries to grab me. I can fly away. I pack a really good punch. I'm quite agile these days too. I can defend my..." But she trailed off. "Is this about what happened in the alley?"

I shrugged, but it was enough.

"I didn't know what I was back then."

"Do you think that would have changed anything?"

"I'm stronger now. Nothing like that will happen again."

She wasn't wrong. And my doubt of her strength was starting to feel a little ridiculous the longer I tried to talk her out of it. "Aren't I supposed to be the one assuring you?"

"I think so... but I also don't remember it. Though you do. You remember the aftermath of me tormented by the trauma. I'm sure you just don't want to see me in such a state again, especially when you're stuck inside." She shook her head. "How about I just hang inside all day? Watch movies or whatever until it's cool enough for us to fly back."

"If you're okay with that."

"Of course I am. I'll have you to cuddle whenever I'm bored."

My eyes narrowed. She's still assuming we are sharing a room tonight. "Not until the evening. You'll be in your room all day."

"Not this again."

"Yes this."

"But we shared a room last—"

"It's different now."

"How?"

"Last night was platonic."

"For who? Just because we didn't do anything doesn't mean you and I didn't lay there thinking about what we wanted to do with the other. I took forever to fall asleep because of it. Had we known how we felt, I'm sure nothing would have kept us—"

"Exactly. If you and I share a room tonight, we might... rush this."

"Rush this?"

The bus came to a stop, the conductor announcing the tour was over. For the moment, our argument also came to a halt as we forwarded off the bus and into the piazza.

But Olivia wasn't done, picking it right back up the moment we paused by the Fontana del Tritone. The water trickled to our right as Olivia had it out with me. "What rushing is there when you and I used to be bonded?"

"Used to."

Her face fell, and her eyes started to gloss over.

"Not that... not having the bond lessens how we fe—"

She held her hand up. "Save it. I get it." Her arms then crossed over her chest before she turned to face the fountain, studying the Triton sitting atop a shell, spouting a stream of water through a conch shell.

A few moments passed with her refusing to look at me as she afforded the merman all her attention instead. And as the doubt began to whirl through my mind, I whispered, "This is why you scare me."

Her face whipped my way, anger consuming her expression, though quickly depleting as her gaze scanned me, transforming her countenance into remorse. "Because I don't agree with you?"

"Because whenever I don't go along with your wishes, you make it seem like I don't care about you. So time and time again, I've conceded... and it saw me wiping your memory or watching you take off to the other side of the world hating me."

Her mouth opened and closed several times as she seemed to rethink what she wanted to say. But before she finally did speak, she threw her arms around my waist, buried her head into my chest, and whispered, "I'm sorry, Lukas. I won't rush you. I just... feel so much regret about all the time I've wasted. But if you need time, I'll wait as long as you need me to."

My arms laced around her, holding her close and relishing in her tiny frame melting into mine. "You're making me sound like a heroine from a Jane Austen novel whose virtue is about to be stolen."

Ollie pulled back, a touch of humour in her eyes and her lips slightly upturned as she replied with, "You peg me more as Jane Eyre."

"And you're Rochester?"

"Well I hope I'm not St. John. I hope our story ends with us together, not me heading off to India as a missionary."

I smirked at her continued joke before I said, "As long as you don't have any ex-lovers locked in an attic, you can definitely be my Rochester."

To my surprise, the smile on her face dropped though. Though before I could question her, she said, "How about some dinner?'

· · ───── ∘☽༓☾∘ ───── · ·

I had booked our flights and rooms as we waited for our food. Though in the end, I compromised with her. While we were going to have separate bedrooms for the evening, we were sharing the Penthouse Suite at Palazzo Manfredi. It was enough to put an end to Ollie's grumbling... which she denied she was doing when I pointed it out.

Our evening went much more smoothly than the afternoon, with nothing else seeming to cause a rift between us. We ate. We drank. We shared stories about our lives during the time we had been apart, somehow avoiding any bitterness when Emma or a past affair of hers was brought into the story.

But after we entered the living area ready to go our separate ways, she whispered, "Do I still get a kiss goodnight, or are we currently on a one-kiss a day pacing?"

I barked a laugh, then wound an arm around her waist before pressing her up against the wall.

The colosseum loomed outside the window, the lights flickering on as the sun set behind the old buildings, but the most picturesque sight was the green-eyed girl staring up at me through her thick eyelashes, copper hair cascading over her bosom that heaved ragged breaths of anticipation.

"I believe we've kissed at least three times today," I chuckled, mouth only breaths from hers, taunting and teasing her desire.

"Two of those were definitely pecks and don't cou—"

I cut her short by pressing my lips briefly to hers, though as I pulled away she pouted.

"That also doesn't cou—"

Once again, I silenced her with another peck.

"Lukas," she giggled, though wound her arms around my neck as if she knew eventually I'd satisfy her. Proving her early proclamation true, she waited until I was ready, enduring the gentle brushes of my mouth on her mouth, on her cheeks, on her forehead, on her nose...

Until finally I couldn't wait any longer.

Going in for her mouth again, I lingered longer, one hand that was on her waist snaking up to her neck, fingers weaving into her hair.

And once again, she waited for me to give what I was willing to give and take what I was willing to take, matching my pace as I led.

It reminded me of the beginning of us. When I used to let her guide us through increased intimacy.

And even if she didn't remember it, I couldn't help smiling at the turn of the tables. That we were both prepared to do this for each other.

My tongue eventually traced its way along her bottom lip, and her mouth opened quickly and eagerly, taking me in as I caressed the insides of her mouth as if exploring a familiar home.

And despite the distance, despite the time that had passed, kissing her still felt just the same as I remembered from almost two years ago. She still tasted like Olivia. Smelled like her—despite her new delectable perfume. She still touched me in all the same ways and kissed exactly as she used to. Neither time nor people nor forgotten memories could touch how we moved together.

But as her body pressed more desperately into mine and the burning desire stirred below, I knew where we would move to next. The next step in this dance that felt so natural.

So I reluctantly pulled back, hands still gripping her as I forced my mouth away.

Her eyes were closed, arms holding on as she anticipated more. Until she realised the conclusion I had come to. Her eyes fluttered back open, disappointment shrouding her gaze before understanding kicked in.

"I'm really struggling to relate my past self right now," she said, voice hoarse.

"What do you mean?" I replied, just as raspy, heart racing as I tried to calm all of me down.

"What on earth could possibly justify forgetting how it feels to kiss you? Or was it just not always this good?"

I chuckled. "I can't answer how it felt for you. But it feels to me like nothing has changed."

She heaved a groan, arms tightening around me before she buried her face into my neck. "I don't want to stop."

I could feel my pants tighten again despite my efforts to calm myself. So I did what we both needed. I pried her arms from me—and she reluctantly obliged—before taking a step back, holding only onto her hand now. "Sleep well, Ollie."

"And you, Lukas."

· · ───── ∘☽༓☾∘ ───── · ·

Steam wafted out of the bathroom as I emerged, and my phone pinged almost instantly.

Brows furrowing as I wonder who would be reaching out at this time, I ambled over and picked it up.

And unfamiliar number scrawled itself across my screen with the message:

Unknown: Is this still your number?

Me: I would have to know who this is first to be able to answer that.

And before her reply came through, I already had an inkling.

Unknown: Olivia.

Me: Yes, it's still my number. Why would I change it?

Ollie: To ensure I can't contact you again?

Me: Opposite actually. I wanted to make sure you could always reach me if you ever needed me again.

Ollie: What a fool I've been.

Me: I think it's time you stop beating yourself up about the past.

Ollie: Only once you've forgiven me.

I paused, thinking through my response first.

Me: I think I'm almost there.

Ollie: I thought you'd fallen asleep!

Ollie: I'm glad to hear that though.

Ollie: Well, read. Because I can't hear you right now :(

Me: Why are you still up?

Ollie: I'm lonely and missing you.

Me: I'm only a hallway away.

Ollie: And that makes me miss you more.

Me: I miss you too.

Ollie: I know how we could fix that...

The corners of my lips turned up and I rolled my eyes.

Me: Goodnight, mein Schatz.

Ollie: Goodnight Lukas. Tomorrow can't come soon enough.

Ollie: But if you change your mind... my door is unlocked.

I snorted another laugh before putting my phone down on the bedside. Then I finally finished drying myself off and put on some clothes for the evening.

Though as I sat on the bed, on top of the sheets, scrolling back through our exchange, my mind was racing with memories of today. With what ifs for the now. With fantasies of what could be if I just walked down that hallway and—

I shook my head and turned my phone off, placing it on my bedside table.

Then I laid down, flicked off the light, and closed my eyes.

As I tossed and turned though, I kept getting glimpses of earlier, her pressed against the wall, the feeling of her body moulding against mine. Her unwavering desire and clear craving of me.

It's too soon, I tried to rationalise.

How is it too soon? As she said, we used to be bonded. We used to live together.

But she doesn't remember that.

Her body seems to.

You're just trying to find any excuse.

Or you're finding any excuse to not get closer to her. Like you're still scared that the final step of intimacy could ruin this or make it harder if she were to leave again. But you're already in deep again.

If I went there, there would be more to miss.

You mean more to regret... you regretted what you hadn't done more than what you had last time. And who says it will end this time?

I kept debating with myself, even as I threw the covers off.

I kept trying to find reasons to sit back down as I got out of bed and stepped into the hallway.

I told myself I'd just take a peek at her to see if she was sleeping.

Though my heart ignited once I saw her last text was literal.

Door ajar, the warm glow flowed under and around the cracks, highlighting the path I had to take. That my body begged me to follow.

With light footsteps, I ensured not a creak could be heard as I wandered down the hallway towards her room. I still needed an out if I changed my mind. And I didn't want her to know I had come by.

When I reached her doorway, I could hear her gentle breaths coming from within. What was she doing, I pondered. What still kept her up?

Hand pressing against the door, I slowly inched it open, trying to get a peek of her.

She laid on the bed, pillows propped behind her, eyes fixed on her phone.

But as I stood there, transfixed in her beauty, suddenly the corners of her lips turned up.

And then she softly said, "I still feel that static, you know. So I know you're there. And I know you've been there for a while."