CHAPTER FIVE
ᴄʟᴏsᴇᴅ ᴅᴏᴏʀ

Hopes that the Cullens would return quickly vanished after the first month. For that entire time, I'd tried to stay positive, all the while as Bella skipped days of school, choosing to do the work under the comforts of her own roof. On days she did turn up, she skipped lunch, floating around the school like a ghost, or like she was stuck between states of being, not quite dead but not quite alive either. While I was stuck entertaining Jess and the rest in her absence, I couldn't help but feel put off by her reaction. I'd lost them too.

But I didn't have room to feel as depressed as Bella did about the Cullen's departure. Alice's twinkling laugh and dazed eyes, along with the smiles I received whenever I was in their company still played in my mind. And though I missed her- other things had taken hold of my worry quite quickly.

It was always Biology lessons that I would notice the most in. Something black and slick gleamed on Erik's hands, so harsh even against the tan of his skin. Black ink seeped into the smooth lines of his palms, dripping from the tips and pointing like the sharp talons of a bird until they dropped, a puddle on the floor. It reminded me so much of William- the stained hands of an artist, but Erik was certainly no painter nor expert in the field of artistic images. And William's medium was never the flawless line of ink. He worked in the dark spilling of blood, painting with his sharp mouth, his canvas clear, human skin, and his impeccable hands coated in layers of the thick, tainted substance.

Everything reminded me of William lately.

He was in everything that I looked at, whether it was a glance or my usual, watchful stare. He was in the cooling, October air, rushing along with the wintery bursts that had begun to take the day in its grasp. He was in the faces of students I passed in the hall, who still somehow managed to find intrigue within my unnatural face. He was even in the icy glare of the sun behind the clouds, glass-like skin seeming to shatter into diamonds of light in the corner of my vision.

Besides a ghost from my past turning up to haunt me, another monster occupied my efforts. There were wolves in Forks, the supernatural kind that would have me by the neck, could they get their dagger-like teeth at me. There were wolves in Forks and I didn't have a clue about what that would mean for me.

It took a few minutes for Charlie to open the door, and when he did, he was rubbing his eyes red, blinking harshly in an attempt to wake himself up. He'd paled significantly since I'd last visited, his skin sheening with a sleepy sweat, the hint of a dangerous purple beneath his eyes and next to his nose. But as always, Charlie pulled a grin onto his face, nodding a greeting as he opened the door wider.

"How is she?"

Charlie couldn't hold back the sigh. "The same as always. She doesn't seem to be getting any better," he said, lips thinning into a line. He glanced up momentarily, eyes narrowing in thought as if he was figuring out whether to say it or not. "Look, I was thinking about sending her to stay with her mother. Just until she cheers up a bit."

"Charlie..." I shook my head, arms folding around my waist. "Cheering her up won't fix things. She's in pain. You can't let her get the wrong idea."

He nodded, eyes looking away, ashamed of even bringing the idea up. It was clear he was coping badly, but he couldn't give up on her yet.

"Just give me some time, I might be able to coax her out," I said, letting him lead me back through the kitchen to the bottom of the stairs.

"Thank you," said Charlie. He let out a sudden huff of anger. "I just can't believe they would do something like that, leaving out of the blue! I thought Carlise was a good man. And Alice- I took a liking to her just as much as I did to you. You were closer to her too, weren't you?"

"Yeah, we were quite close."

His face spread into a look of disbelief. "And she said nothing?"

"Not a single word. At least Edward told her where he was going," I said, unable to keep the edge of bitterness from my voice.

"I'm sorry," he said. I shrugged. "Thank you, for being strong."

"Thanks, Charlie."

What little sun Forks would get through the day dimmed by three o'clock in the winter, allowing streets to be illuminated by the warm lights that pooled through open windows and the flashing of cars. Despite the shadows that lurked in the upstairs of Charlie's house, no light spilled from the cracks beneath Bella's bedroom door.

I could hear her heartbeat- steady and loud against the silence that gripped the cold air. But it wasn't slow enough for her to be sleeping. I knocked on the door, shattering through the quiet. There was no reply from the other side. Only the skipping of a heartbeat, almost too quick to notice. The handle of the door was twisted downwards, locked.

"Bella? It's Elide," I said softly. "Can I come in?"

There was a mumble- something that distinctly sounded like 'go away'.

"I just came to see if you were alright," I said before cringing. "I thought maybe we could go on a walk sometime?"

Again, there was no reply.

"I'm here for you Bella. I promised I wouldn't leave," I said, shuffling the book beneath my arm. "I'll be right outside your door until I leave if you want to talk."

Sliding down against her door, I settled on the floor, leaning my head back. The book I'd brought for Bella slid down to my lap and I reached for it, opened it to the front page and cracked open the spine. The scent of old, yellowing pages filled my nose, momentarily covering the stench of old coffee that overpowered the landing.

Bella didn't speak or open the door the whole time I was there, but I could sense, by the steadiness of her heart rhythm and the easiness of her breathing, that my presence wasn't entirely unwanted. I shuffled down the stairs, leaving the book by her doorstep. With footsteps purposefully loud, I walked through the hallway and into the kitchen, waking Charlie from where he was slumped over the table, the handle of his coffee mug still clenched in his fingers.

"Sorry, Elide, I must've dozed off," he said, brushing off the yawn that tugged at his lips.

I let out a small chuckle. "It's alright. No offence, but you look like you could do with the sleep."

"Thanks for that," Charlie chuffed jokingly, sliding from his chair and pouring the coffee down the sink. "With the bear situation and Bella keeping up at night with the nightmares, I haven't had much sleep."

My attention spiked. "Bear situation?"

"You haven't heard?" As I shook my head, he continued. "Well, I was meaning to tell you anyway. Keep out of the forest at the moment if you can. There have been sightings of bears- big ones- all through the woods for the last month or so. Few hikers have gone missing too."

"Really?"

He nodded glumly. "Yeah, been a whole damn mess," Charlie said, pausing to stretch and look at the clock on the bench. "It's late, how 'bout you stay for some dinner, maybe Bella will join us?"

"I don't know. I wouldn't want to intrude."

"Intrude on what?" He said suddenly, cringing after the words left his mouth. "I haven't had company in days, is all I mean. Except for the fishing days with the boys from the reservation, but they're getting fewer and fewer these days."

"Okay then," I said, smiling softly.

I was ashamed to say that even though I liked Charlie and his friendly nature, part of my reason for agreeing was the mention of the reservation. His potential knowledge of Sam Uley and the boy's friends caught my interest. Though, in defence, it was arduous for a vampire to fake it at a meal, for obvious reasons.

I set myself at the kitchen table, watching as Charlie made his way along the benches, scouring the cupboards, his eyebrows drawn taut. He scratched his head, letting out an awkward, embarrassed laugh.

"Now, being honest, I can't remember what I was going to make," he said. "You haven't seen the cookbook around, have you?"

I stood from the chair, walking over to pick up the old cookbook that hid beneath a pile of old coffee mugs. "Here, why don't I cook. You really do need the rest."

"It's not lack of sleep- I'm just dirt bad at cooking," Charlie said.

"Either way, I think Bella might appreciate it if I cook tonight."

He shook his head. "I couldn't ask that of you."

"Don't worry. I'm not the best, but I need the practice."

After all of the coaxing, Charlie finally agreed to let me cook. He seemed pleased in the end, thankful for the chance at two minutes rest. I flicked through the recipe book, stopping on a page with a simple pasta recipe- one I was sure Bella had told me about before.

The cooking made me think about Esme and her elaborate cakes and fanciful dishes. It was true that I could never have the patience to match hers. Even messing around with the pasta sauce, I could feel my endurance slipping. But I didn't like thinking about the Cullens, so I turned to Charlie, thinking instead of what he said earlier.

"So who do you go fishing with? I always see people with their trucks filled with the gear," I said, as I turned on the hob, setting the sauce to heat.

"Billy Black and Harry Clearwater mostly. The boys like to think they can outdo me," Charlie said. He was leaning back in his chair, smiling at the mere thought of it all. "Being honest most of the time they do."

"I've never been fishing."

"Neither's Bella. I keep asking and she keeps turning it down." He sighed, breaking out into a tired grin again. "She cooks it good afterwards though."

"I think I met Sam Uley at La Push a while ago. The boy who found Bella," I added after a moment of quiet.

"Yeah, Sam. He's a good kid. He's shot up since you and Bella would have seen him. Got a good few inches on me and the muscles of an animal. I don't know what they're feeding them."

What Charlie said made sense, I supposed. At the beach, Sam had looked small-framed, his shoulder slim and huddled- not nearly as capable of being a wolf as he was when I last saw him with Bella in the woods. But the time frame of it all seemed so quick, and I wanted to know how much he'd known then, and how much he knew now- specifically about me.

I set a plate down in front of Charlie, grimacing. He didn't seem to notice, as he picked up his fork digging in hungrily. He glanced to the empty chair across.

"I don't think I could force food down at the moment," I said.

His eyebrows raised. "Make sure to take a plate with you then."

"I will," I said. I picked up another smaller plate. "I'll take this up to Bella."

Charlie's voice called from the kitchen. "She's taken to not answering. You might have to just leave it at the door."

☾

Listening to THAT song on the twilight/new moon soundtrack while writing this chapter really wasn't a good idea. Why did I do that to myself?
Thank you so much for 20k!