Jimin arrived at home and his heart sank further into his stomach when he found his parents in the living room, silently discussing things. Their eyes met and Jimin strode towards them while hearing his heart ringing in his ears. "I don't want to be the one to say I told you so, but I did, Jimin," Mr. Park's eyes had disappointment in them. "Jungkook was nothing but a distraction to you and you fell prey to his cunningness."

"He isn't like that, father." Jimin looked down, mumbling slowly. Mrs. Park was aware of the relationship between the two so she wanted to say something, but she kept quiet as she needed to discuss it separately with her husband first and it wasn't a good time.

"You are still defending him. I'd run in the other direction, Jimin. I don't have expectations from you anymore." The man walked away slowly, causing Jimin's unshed tears to pour down his eyes. Mrs. Park stepped towards her son to hold him, but Jimin turned away and ran to his room.

Closing the door behind, he plunked on the floor and clutched his head with both hands.

Meanwhile, Jungkook's home had a completely contrasting environment with cheery lights, good food, and the gathering of a few close friends and family. Jungkook couldn't be happy entirely after his conversation with Jimin earlier. He smiled for the cameras when people clicked with him, but only on the outside.

Getting over with everything and finally going into his room, Jungkook checked to see no texts from Jimin. They talked or texted around this time every day before falling asleep. He was now sure that Jimin wasn't okay and this feeling made him feel sick to his stomach. With anxiety blinding him, he called Jimin only to be cut off. When he attempted again, Jimin's phone was now turned off.

The night seemed the longest to the boy now who couldn't sleep and ran to the bathroom to throw up in the middle of it.

**

The feelings on the first day of senior high weren't how Jungkook imagined them to be. Instead of being enthusiastic and proud, Jungkook was rather dim and guilty now. He knew that Jimin wasn't going to pick him up so he asked his father and was half an hour early for the class.

No one has arrived yet, but gradually, the class began to fill. The congratulatory remarks made Jungkook feel guiltier now, even though he shouldn't, as his head cocked at the door with every silhouette entering through the door. It was Jimin at last who entered the class with a pale face.

Jungkook's heart busted at the sight as he lurked to talk to the boy. "Hyung, congratulations!" The boy tried to express with a bright smile that he managed to carve on his lips.

"For what?" Jimin replied rather wryly as he plopped his backpack over to his desk and sat down without looking at Jungkook.

Jungkook knew now. The doubt he had was now converted into the assurance that Jimin was mad because he had gotten the highest marks. "Y-you scored second," the boy stood behind Jimin's desk, speaking guiltily.

"So what?" Jimin asked without turning around. "I am not satisfied."

The words caused Jungkook's stomach to feel funny. As if on cue, the teacher entered the classroom and Jungkook had to retreat his steps. The new class layout was different than the last one. Jungkook had placed his bag on the last bench and Jimin had sat two rows from the front. Jungkook's eyes were moist as he walked back and sat down with a sigh to calm his nerves, but nothing brought comfort to him.

As class commenced, he only prayed that the teacher wouldn't ask him anything because even though he tried so hard to concentrate on the words, they slipped right past his ears. "I am not satisfied." They kept suspending throughout the air and dripping the venomous tone of hatred.

The classes kept going, and Jungkook kept noticing Jimin's figure from behind. The older boy stood after three classes and walked out. Jungkook followed too as he saw the older getting to the washroom. He wanted to barge in and hug him, but something about Jimin made him not follow him. The boy looked exactly the way he used to when they started their junior high exactly a year ago, cold, bitter, and dangerous.

Jimin when stepped out and his eyes fell on Jungkook for a moment before he tore them away, he began to quickly rush back to the classroom. Jungkook slowly walked into the bathroom and washed his face, letting the accumulating tears clear out.

**

Jimin realized that Jungkook hadn't come to the cafeteria to eat. His own nerves ached in pain as he knew he wouldn't be able to eat when his Jungkook was hungry, knowing how much the younger loved food. Jimin had a tolerance for hunger as he often dieted or did intermittent fasting for his dance routines and workouts, but he knew how much Jungkook had difficulty controlling it. The thought only made him want to rush back into the classroom and feed the little boyfriend. But then he remembered what had happened back at home last night, definitely something he'd never forget.

Never has he been humiliated so much and hated himself. The look in his father's eyes, the silence of his mother's voice, nothing sat well with him. Only if his parents were supportive like Jungkook's, he'd have celebrated the victory of his boyfriend, but he didn't know what to do anymore and how to do it. His dream of getting into the dance school was smashed. He had nothing but loath in his mind, and the worst thing was, he didn't know what he hated.

He could breathe when Jungkook walked in slowly into the cafeteria with Yoongi and so he began to eat with problematic swallowing. His throat seemed constricted and his mind was conflicted. At the end of the day, he knew Jungkook deserved better than this. Just as he was beginning to be happy with his life, everything crumpled together, pushing him towards the unlimited grey.

Over his shoulders, he kept glancing at the younger who looked spaced out as he slowly prompted his chopsticks to his pale mouth and ate a little.

Unable to see him like this, Jimin stood up and returned the half-eaten tray to the kitchen before leaving the cafeteria. Every inch and corner of the school reminded him of Jungkook. As his gaze fell over the vending machine, he recollected how he scolded Jungkook when he was stealing. The medical room from the corridor reminded him how Jungkook was in pain when he hugged him. The old classroom made him hear the giggles and the peal of laughter he had shared with the boy. All he wanted was to pick up his bag and leave, but he didn't have the energy to argue with the guards or face his father in case Bang called him afterward.

The day was so heavy on both of them that it seemed far stretched out. By the end of the last class, everything hurt. Jimin hurried and was out of the premises first while Jungkook remained standing outside, alone, waiting for the bus as he forgot to mention to his father that he had to come to pick him up.

As he stood alone, his eyes teared up, feeling the absence of his Jimin Hyung who always cheered him up. He realized how deeply he felt for him when he couldn't talk to Jimin anymore. But he knew he wasn't going to let it all go to nothing without trying his best to win Jimin back again. He'd do anything to have him in his life. When the bus stopped in front of him, he got in with determination that he'd talk to Jimin anyhow, because, without him, he didn't know how to live anymore. Today hurt.

**

The night was calm and so were Jungkook's parents. They didn't speculate on why their son looked so out of it, but it was as though they read the silence. Jungkook, then went to his room, grabbed his phone which was barren of any notifications from Jimin, and called the boy. It rang for thirty seconds and disconnected. Jungkook's eyes brimmed at the rejection, but he wasn't going to quit so he called again.

When he heard Jimin's voice over the call, he couldn't say anything for a few moments.

"Hello, Jungkook?"

"H-hyung," Jungkook spoke after clearing his throat. "Can we please talk?"

"I don't have anything to say, Jungkook. I have nothing against you, but it wasn't what I expected and so did my parents. I hurt them and their expectations."

"But Hyung," Jungkook croaked desperately, tears now falling over his arms as he sat over his bed. "Why aren't you talking to me? I can't do t-this."

Jungkook began to cry.

"Baby," Jimin clutched his chest which felt a pang and his eyes turned moist. "Shh, please don't cry. You are fine. I am just going through a lot. Please understand, Jungkook. I just need a little bit of time."

At least Jimin used the endearment so that made Jungkook smile a bit. He sniffled while wiping his nose and took in a shaky breath. "Will you please talk to me tomorrow in school?"

Jimin could envision how the boy's nose must be red and how he was using the back of his hand to wipe his tears. "I will if you stop crying. Shh..." He shushed. Neither he nor Jungkook spoke for a few minutes until they stopped crying and then Jimin silently disconnected the call.

4 Apr, 2022