As I neared the rear entrance of the soup kitchen, my body grew increasingly flushed with heat. My center moistened with anticipation. I peeked around the campus on my way through the back door, searching for any sign of him.

"Morning, sister," I greeted the nun I found in the kitchen without a second glance.

They all looked the same to me anyway. In all the years I'd spent coming here, I hadn't managed to learn many of the residents' names. Jonathan was all that really mattered. Plus, I heard what these people said about me behind my back. Sneaking around to meet up with him gave me that advantage. Most of the sworn-into-silence sisters were actually quite chatty gossips. It wasn't exactly against their vows unless they spoke to men.

The nun only nodded in response to my greeting. She waited patiently as I unloaded the delivery from my bag.

Where is he? I thought, anxiously stealing glances out of the corner of my eye.

I slowed down separating the order from what would remain in the satchel and pretended to inspect an item, unsure if it was meant for the abbey or not. The nun rolled her eyes and released an agitated sigh.

Then I saw sunlight catch on those telltale blonde curls as he dodged between corridors, slipping through the doors of the library.

"Oh, wonderful, I think it's all here," I announced cheerily, shoving my bag closed and slinging it back over my shoulder. "See you in a week," I hastily exited, pretending to make my way to the abbey church for a quick confessional.

I made sure no one saw me as I back tracked and dipped through the library doors. Not many people visited the library. The books within only depicted the same stories, retelling after retelling. I think they were meant to offer different perspectives to connect people from all walks of life to the Church. Maybe the orphans had grown tired of the same old stories. Maybe the monks and nuns weren't interested in those perspectives. They certainly seemed to have decided long ago in their faith that there was only ever one truth. Their own. Regardless if it truly followed the Church's message or not. Not that I was complaining. This left the library free for other activities.

With careful steps, I quietly stalked through the bookshelves. The room was warmer than outside, but a chill lingered that brought goosebumps to my skin. I knew he'd likely be hiding where the light from the windows didn't penetrate in the furthest rows back. A quiver of eagerness tickled at my belly. My nipples perked as I rubbed my lips together, aching for a taste of him.

Where is he? My eyes hadn't adjusted to the dark yet and I strained to see into the shadows. I was crawling out of my skin ready for his touch.

Hands curled around my waist, pulling me deep into the shadows before slipping quickly to the button of my trousers and crudely yanking them down.

I threw down my bag and tried to twist in place to look behind me. "Jonathan, I –"

He cut me off with a, "Shhh."

I bit into my lower lip, dragging it roughly between my teeth as he pulled my undergarments aside and shoved himself inside me without any other preamble. It didn't matter. I was already primed for him. He muffled the whimper he pounded out of me by covering my mouth with his hand as he painfully gripped my waist in place with the other, the muscles in his arms flexing. My eyes rolled back as the pain mixed with pleasure.

He was relentless, only letting go of my face to press on my back, demanding a deeper angle. I obeyed. It was easy for him to take control of my body since he was so much bigger than me.

"I love how you're so maneuverable, like a doll," he whispered between huffs of breath.

I tried my best to keep quiet, but the sound of his quickening breath was driving me wild. "Oh, fuck, Jonathan, that feels so goo –"

"Shh. Don't be so lewd," he chastised.

I could feel his pace become wild and impatient. It wouldn't be long before he finished, and I wanted to come with him. I reached for that small bundle of nerves, pressing hard into it with my fingertips and eliciting my inner walls to spasm and tighten around him.

I twisted to watch his face as he swelled inside me. He groaned with pleasure, squeezing his eyes shut as he came. The sound was so exciting that it sent my hand fervently grinding into my clit until I was sent over the edge with stars in my eyes. The lights flashed in front of me like explosions of small fireworks. I blinked at the brightness my magic had caused. Jonathan didn't seem to notice as he lulled his head back with a heavy sigh.

He pulled out of me and straightened his clothing as I did the same, my legs quivering to find stability.

The exertion had caused a light sheen of sweat across his forehead, and he lifted the ends of his top to wipe at his face. The action exposed the sculpted physique he'd acquired through manual labor in service to the Church. 

Fuck, I want to lick him, I thought, not quite satisfied with our quick rendezvous. I reached out and dragged a finger down the middle of his muscled stomach. "You know, if we ran away and got married, we could do that every day," I offered, dropping my voice into a thick seductive tone.

He huffed a laugh and gently tapped my chin with his knuckle. "You know that's not possible. I have a commitment to the Church. I can't just marry some entertainer's daughter. How would that look?"

I dropped my eyes, blushing deeply, "Yeah, I get it."

He lifted my bag, slinging it over my shoulder for me. "See you next week?"

Despite my fortitude, tears were starting to pool under my vision. "Yeah," I choked out.

"Hey, don't be like that," he tutted, pulling my head into his chest for an embrace, "You have to understand where I'm coming from. Of course I wish we could do this every day. But the fact is my commitment comes above all else. You wouldn't ask me to abandon that, would you? That wouldn't be fair."

I nodded and blinked away the tears, "No, I could never ask that of you."

He kissed my forehead, "I knew you'd understand. Such a good little doll." He overemphasized the last word as he reached up to pinch my nipple, laughing when I yelped in pain. Then he spun my body towards the exit and gave my bottom a hard slap. "See you next week," he repeated.

I hastily shuffled out the door, unable to fight the heat rising in my face.

Thankfully a chill still hung in the late morning air, helping me to cool off. The ache between my thighs would last long enough to make me wish I hadn't thrown myself at him again. And it would dissipate quickly enough to leave me wishing I could pin him down for round two.

I rubbed away any lingering moistness on my eyes as I continued my path around the lower city. I still had a couple more deliveries to make today. Hopefully Martin would have taken more orders while I was out. I needed a longer route to clear my head.

I shouldn't have been surprised by Jonathan's response. I'd asked him to run away and marry me a dozen times over the course of the last decade. I guess I just kept hoping he would change his mind. But I couldn't leave him. He was the only person who never compared me to my mother. The only boy who didn't wonder out loud why I was cursed with such small disappointing breasts compared to her. Why I wasn't as poised and graceful as her.

If only he wasn't so damn beautiful, maybe then I could just live the life of a celibate, I sighed. At least I get to share him with the Church, I thought sarcastically, for now. I dreaded the day he took his vows. He insisted it would be any day now. It would be the end of whatever it was we had. Besides, if he hadn't noticed my magic before today it was only a matter of time. Then being the Phoenix's daughter would be the last thing the Church would have issue with regarding our relationship.

I kicked at the ground, wanting nothing more than to bury my head in the dirt like one of those daft birds. At the very least, I wished I could curl up in my bed and cry for a few days. But I needed coin more than I needed comfort.

I trekked down the path to the baker's shop. He lived behind it with his son who was a few years older than my brother. The wife had passed away some time ago and now both men seemed a bit lonely. Neither were especially hideous though and I often wondered why there was no new woman in either of their lives.

"Hey, Rumor," the son called over to me, flicking his head back to remove the shaggy brown hair from his face.

Rupert was considerably more stout than Jonathan. Still easily as well muscled from his work, but while Jonathan was tall and lean, Rupert was wide and girthy.

I wonder what else about him is girthy. I let myself mischievously think. He wasn't really my type, plus he was quite a bit younger than me, but he could make for some entertainment. I internally reprimanded myself. You are not that kind of woman.

I set my satchel on the counter in front of him. "Good morning, Rupert," I said as I presented his order to him. "How's your dad?" I offered what little small talk I could. He was nice enough to warrant it.

"Good, I think he's around here somewhere if you wanted to say hi," he casually leaned on the counter.

I waved my hands dismissively, "Oh no, but tell him I said hello." I gathered my bag and slung it over my shoulder again.

He stopped me before I could leave, "Oh, well, you know I heard an interesting rum- I mean- some information yesterday."

I ignored his slip of the tongue, "Oh?"

"Yeah," he leaned toward me and motioned me to lean in. "There's a new apothecary in town," he said in a hushed voice.

I wasn't sure why that warranted such secretive speaking, "And?"

"And the ru- information is that he's secretly a warlock," he raised his eyebrows expectantly.

A warlock. Another magic user. My mouth went dry. "Oh, wow. And the Church knows of this?"

He shrugged, "You know how it is, they think it's probably just gossip from some old bitty."

I chuckled awkwardly. "Yeah, probably just gossip," I repeated.

"Did you know warlocks make deals with devils for their powers?" He asked a bit astonished.

"You know, I think I have heard that," I feigned thought.

But my mother's words were all I could hear in my mind, "These devil powers of yours," she'd said with a wailing sigh, "Ugh, how was I cursed with such a wretched child? You'd better keep them hidden or else I'll have no choice but to disown you," she had threatened. Then she had left me in that cottage all alone, fearful the devil who gave me my powers would return. I was barely seven years old and had to learn to care for myself with what little she had left me. She came back when I was ten with a mewling babe in tow. "This is your baby brother. The entertainment district is no place for such an innocent sweet boy. You'll need to care for him here. It's the least you could do to make up for being cursed with you," she'd spat.

At least having Aesop at home meant mother would visit more often. The perk of that being solely that she would on the rare occasion spare at least a couple coins for her precious son. It was never enough though.

"Rumor? Hey, Rumor?" Rupert waved his hand in front of my face.

"Huh?"

"I said, tell me if you see this guy around town. I don't want you getting mixed up with anyone like that," he reached out and held my hand, "He sounds like bad news, and I just don't want you to risk it."

I pulled my hand back and patted his arm. "No worries. I have no plans to get involved with warlocks or devils," I assured him. Any more than I already am, I thought.

I waved him goodbyeand went back to Martin's shop, eager to get more deliveries for the excuse toclear my head of men and devils.