Its hard to say what I'm feeling right now,too overwhelmed with emotions ,i wish i really had someone beside me now ,really craving to be hugged ,may be call desperate too may be it sound like too shameful to accept this fact,but I'm craving love physical gestures of love like hugging,leaning on shoulder patt on back anything.sorry if i sounded too shameless & desperate but can't help I'm missing mumma too much this time ,cant stop myself as i desperately wanted to share my feelings so posting here as poetry hoping my wattpad family will not misunderstand me like my real one did.

Sorry in advance if anything in this post offends anyone.I'm just too much in pain tonighti guess every night reasons are many but tonight i just can't 😭😭

                                                     " A BIT MORE" 

How shall I not miss you a bit more

When i see everyone enjoying with their moms 

i feel envious of all

I always lacked things what other's got easily in life

May be its sibling,friends or love of life

Now you too top the list ,as you are not with me anymore

Still i feel a part of you alive in me 

everytime a breath a bit more 

bearing the unbearable you brought me to life

When the whole family was dreaming of a boy

You weaved wollen dolls & asked almighty to give you a doll in life

I have been always your favourite so as you were mine

When i meant the world to you

You where the sun around whom my life revolved day & night

Trying to compensate every void in my life 

you became my best friend ,my sibling even my secret admirer sometime

I still can't forget you completely

Nor i will be able to do in this life

No matter how old we grow up

A mother will be always needed in our life

I miss your warmth

I miss your hugs

I miss your laugh

I miss your beauty

I miss the way you used to sort out everything before it gets worst

I miss the way you could read my eyes when i m sad or I'm happy as squirrel with the nuts

You know the world calls me both strong & weak at the same time

Strong as i moved ahead without you in life

Weak because i still miss you every night

Not knowing being strong is not my choice 

its the decision taken by destiny & life

When I'm all broken every night

I don't have anyone to share it

To hug me tight

Months have gone I'm still craving to be hugged by someone tight

Too desperate to be in a hug &

 let out my pain that I'm collecting inside

But so unlucky I'm that i have no one even to hug once

So i wrapped my arms around myself & cried

Leaning on the door of washroom i sobbed i sobbed continuously 

until i felt tired & end up putting my emotions in words again

 in this dark night