chapter : 14
wedding jitters

a surprise update?
haha, so most of us have a holiday tomorrow, so here it goes.

thank you for giving this book of mine a chance. after TNR (that's my first gen fiction and completed), it took me kaafi time to get back to writing.

all your reviews mean so much to me, thank you. ❤️

Update: I have made severe changes in chapters 1 & 2, please read that even if you had read the older version. :)

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n o o r
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"So you are marrying the love of my life?"

Dheer and I are currently on a video call, he had thrown a tantrum when he noticed the ring on my finger. After Kabir left, sleep felt so foreign to me.

The ring felt heavier than it actually was. It poked and pinched my skin, itching my calmness away. It is a beautiful piece. Kabir and I both were surprised when it slid so effortlessly, it was the perfect size. I had questioned about how he got it but he just said it was just a chance.

I had given in and called Dheer, stirring away his sleep. If I didn't get to sleep, my best friend should be deprived of it as well.

"You have never even met him."

"But I know everything about him. I have read all the magazines he has interviews printed on." He is joking, or maybe not, but either way, I know he doesn't
mean it. He might be crushing over him but he genuinely has no strong feelings for Kabir.

"You really don't like him that much right? I can talk to him—"

"Oh stop. I am just teasing you. He is hot but I have no feelings. I just enjoy expressing my love for him in front of you, we both share that in common."

"Excuse me?"

"I said I am teasing you.."

"No, not that. What did you mean by we both share that in common? What did you imply by that?"

"Babe. You are obsessed with him. We both act like two teenage girls gossiping over our boy crush."

"I don't have a crush on him. I don't even like him. You
missed the part where I told you uncountable times about how much I loathe him."

"Yeah right. That's why you are still wearing the ring on your finger even if there's no one you have to prove your relationship to."

I take a peek at the ring. It shines even brighter in the dark.

"I wore it because it helps me remember. It helps me focus. It helps me make sense of everything that has transpired. It reminds me of my choices and why I need to stick to them. My mother called me several times today. Every time she asked the same question eventually, if I was truly happy. Prerna called not because she doubted me, she saw the exchange that took between Kabir and me and she is happy for me. But she wants me to confess my thoughts to him, she kept telling me how relations are based on love and trust." I barely hold back my scoff.

"You know what's worse?" I keep going on."Even my dad called three times. The first time he asked me if I were okay with things moving so fast. If I genuinely were happy. The second time, he called to let me know that my marriage didn't promise my father's throne and position. For all the miseries, my uncle could take over everything if things worked in his favour. The third time was when he told me about the proposal that officially came through. I had told him every time he called, that I was happy."

"My uncle and aunt sent me a message congratulating me but even a mobile screen couldn't hide their distaste and hatred. My cousins called me, we spoke for hours after so long. That's how I came to know that when the proposal had first been sent, it wasn't for Prerna. My uncle had insisted on marrying my cousin, Shikha, who is barely twenty years old. My uncle thought earlier the marriage, earlier she would produce an heir—closer to the throne."

I am barely holding my sobs back. My eyes feel so weighty, my lids are damped and sticking.

"My dad doesn't care about the position, Dheer. I know that about him. If he was greedy, he would have tried getting Prerna married. He doesn't care about it. The only reason why he was angry at my uncle was because Shikha was against it. My father believes that all children are equal, and have the same right. But they don't, my uncle and aunt are very greedy. They hate me and my family, they want every penny in our name, all the power."

"Don't cry, baby. You are very strong for what you have chosen to do."

"I can't let them be any more embarrassed because of me. When I had run away, I never thought I'd be put in their path this way. Now that I have, I can't run away. I need to do this."

"And you are. You are keeping your family before you, you are prioritising them over you. You aren't the cause of their embarrassment. You never were."

"I hope so, Dheer. I genuinely hope that it's true."

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His breath falls on my nape, erupting tingles and shivers. Pricking and poking, burning and dousing. I feel hot. Bothered and withering.

There's a volcano erupting, lava painfully spreading. My skin is charring, my heart palpitates. The room's suffocating, my lungs fighting for oxygen. I am breathless, demolishing my control.

"I am annoyed because I hate sharing, Noor."

"Kab—" And like the fire extinguishes, my eyes pry open. I look around. The familiar outlines of my house come into my sight. I get up from the sofa, realising how I had dozed off while talking to Dheer.

There are sweat beads on my forehead, my body feels sticky. There's an ache, a want, a desire swirling in the pit of my stomach extending down south. It's an alien feeling, one I have never had for him. One that stands strong, that can destroy the plans we have made. That poses a threat. All my fault. Things I need to curb even before it takes a proper shape.

I push back the comforter, walking to the bathroom. I need to start my day, I need to keep myself in check. It was a false alarm. I don't feel anything for him, it's just a mere neuronal cross-connection. I think I am about to get my period soon, the hormonal imbalance is creating an illusion.

One that I need to throw a stone on and shatter it to pieces.

Fucking hormones.

The drive to the office was short and quick. I make myself a cup of coffee before I sit down at my workstation. I log into my desk computer, checking my schedule for today. There are certain meetings I need to arrange and plan for, and certain signatures I have to take Kabir's sign for.

Some documents to make changes, I start my work for the day. I make some needed calls scoring meetings with leading hotel developers. We are an interior designing firm, and hotel chain owners are the best clients one can ask for.

I flag some important emails and circle one mail that contains an important invite. Mr Shah is one of the best hoteliers in the country, his recent building was designed by our firm whose opening is scheduled in six weeks.

The bitter taste of my coffee explodes in my mouth, the aroma settles my anxiety. There's so much I have on my sleeve today. Once I am done making the calls to
the clients, I make calls now to the recruits who were hired by the firm.

Their final interviews have to be scheduled this week.

"Noor, these are the files we need sir's signatures on."

"Noor, the quotations are erroneous. Please check the numbers."

"Noor, my leave application."

Throughout the day, many stop by my desk. It was indeed a busy day. I stack the files and applications I had received today, balancing them carefully. Walking towards the cabin, I knock and wait.

It was close to three in the afternoon, in two hours people would start calling it a day. Kabir had been busy with his share of online meetings. He has a breather now before even he leaves for home.

"Yes." His voice is muddled.

I shove the door roughly with my hip, the files juggling with the sudden movement. The spectacles I hardly ever wear keep slipping down the bridge of my nose. The pile falls with a thud on the desk once I loosen my grip.

"The file with yellow sticky notes has to be signed, the ones with pink need to be reviewed and the orange ones have to be corrected. The envelopes have leave applications for this month and the calendar marks the meetings you have with the new enlisted employees."

"You aren't wearing.." I raise my eyes to see him. His are trained on my left hand, one that only has a mark left.

"Yeah? Office."

"Right."

His query refreshes my memory of something I had wanted to do that day. "Wait this reminds me of this." I reach to the pocket of my trouser pants. I had opted for formal attire today. Normally, I am always dressed in kurtis and jeans. Decent and comfortable.

"Here. This belongs to you." I slither the box to him.

I had picked up his wedding ring online the previous night and got its delivery today. My family had called me in the afternoon telling me that they were planning the wedding.

I had refused a big ceremony. I told them I wanted a court marriage and nothing else. Just do and move forward.

They tried fighting me but soon gave up. Luckily, Kabir had put forth the same condition. They were zeroing upon date soon, all of them afraid that after so much agreement, we would back out.

Something about not trusting the newer generations with relationships.

"You bought this?"

"No. I was waiting in my car under a tree. It fell from it." I roll my eyes at his question.

It's a brand new case, the platinum band shimmers boldly. It's plain but I doubt Kabir would like any stones on his ring. Unlike him, I knew his ring size because of the many endeavours he had sent me on during my course of employment.

"Well."

"I bought it."

"Good."

"Nice."

He keeps the box in the drawer, returning to the work I brought for him. A fiddly distance between us and I recollect the dream I had this morning.

It reels and plays in my head, there's fluttering in my stomach. I am abashed and guilty and disappointed.

Fuck. Concentrate.

There's another rapping against the door which pauses and the door opens. A lady dressed in a silk pink ruffled top that is tucked into her black tight skirt. Her curves fill in fully, and beautifully. I don't know her name but I know she works in administration.

She often directly contacts the CEO, so I am guessing she is in a high post. Her heels are long and pointedly ticks against the wooden flooring.

Her plush lips curve in a suggestive smile directed at him. For now, he doesn't notice her but her scent is strong enough to overpower anyone. While she stands so confident and gracefully, I dare to look at myself.

My white shirt is tucked but creased, my trousers are a little faded. It doesn't look bad, but my doubts snake around. The dark thoughts cloud my practicality.

"Kabir.." Her voice calls out, sweet as honey. My eyebrow raise at her audacity but on seeing an unfazed look on Kabir, I assume it was her normal.

I stand rooted in my place, I have given him the files, and the ring, and explained everything. Logically, I should leave them alone but something stops me.

"There's a problem in our workspace. Can some of us relocate to the cubicles near your cabin?"

Yeah right. The fuck is wrong with me. For the love of everything, she can be telling the truth. Since when did I become so bitchy?

"Noor. Oh my, you finally learnt what an office dress code is?" And here's why.

Apart from Sana, Yug and a handful of employees, everyone treats me like a speck of dust on the Moon. They admire Kabir but hate how he chose an assistant like me who doesn't obey their orders or wishes.

Most of them consider me their enemy just because I didn't authenticate their fake leave applications and complaints. They love to play the political drama and in my attempt to stir away from them, I have made myself their prime victim.

"I wear clothes that enable me to work comfortably. Not everyone's here to impress with their clothes, I prefer my work to speak for itself."

Her mouth gapes open like a fish stuck in a net. She has always snickered comments on me, and I have given her back but never in front of Kabir.

"I'll let you work." I smile at her and leave the cabin avoiding seeing Kabir's expressions.

The moment I am out, I inhale deeply. It was so wrong. This is bad. Bad. Bad.

Fuck.

Bad. Bad.

It's all because now there's a genuine thread that is binding me to him. Yes. My brain's going crazy. I need to keep it in check. Keep reminding it where we stand. Because if my brain fails to comprehend it, it wouldn't take longer for my heart to get involved and that's a recipe for disaster.

I need to distract myself. I need an out.

"Let's go out tonight." I type a message and send it to both Sana and Dheer. They'll help me keep myself in control, being alone can let me spiral down this path.

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thank you!

Hahah it was a looong one!

if you find any typos or error, do help me correct them. :)

before we end this chapter,
i knowww i ask this so often (always) but
as we are progressing with the story, how are you finding the writing?

there's has been some doubts in my head and i am not sure if this story is going well, making sense and is being done justice to. to the readers, it would mean so much if you could let me know where i am going wrong. :)

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take care :))

royally yours,
meethi.