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When something bad happens, I usually feel an aura around me. The air feels stagnant, my heart pounds harder, and I never feel comfortable. As we wait in the drawing room for King Hugh, I shuffle myself on the sofa for the fifth time. It's something bad, I can tell, but I keep the idea to myself so not to worry Kai even more.

We got back from Egypt an hour ago, landing at the private RAF airport and being driven straight here. My parents and Patrick will have gone straight home, while Emma is on Kai's chest in the baby sling, sleeping. We weren't instructed not to bring her, and the nanny was exhausted, so we sent her home for a break.

"What's up, Peach?" Kai asks.

I shake my head and adjust my seat again. My trousers suddenly feel itchy, despite me wearing them all day, on a plane and in the car. "Nothing's wrong," I lie. Well, it's not a lie per se, because as far as I know nothing is wrong, but I feel like it is. Everything feels claustrophobic and too close.

"Peach, I know you. Something's wrong."

I sigh. "I just... something feels off. Like... something bad is going to happen. I felt like this when you arrived to tell me we were going to fake this marriage thing when I was pregnant with Emma."

He laughs. "I mean, that turned out pretty well, I think. Prince Kai is sometimes right."

I snort. "It may have turned out, but you definitely weren't right. You never are. It was karma for both of us not using protection that night."

He cocks his head. "Fair point. If you're my karma, then I clearly did something right."

"Smooth as ever, Duke of Hampshire." The Dukedom titles we were given on our wedding day feel weird on my tongue because, though we have them, no one uses them.

"No one ever uses our titles like that. Feels weird. Prince and Princess sound better."

I shrug. "People don't use it because Prince and Princess of Wales are a higher title, right?"

Kai nods and adjusts Emma a little against his chest. "Yeah, pretty much. We lose them once we ascend, because the title of King and Queen Consort rule, obviously. But the title will be ours to give to whomever we want. I'd probably suggest giving it to Emma when she comes of age at eighteen."

I nod. "That kind of stuff goes over my head with who gets what title and dukedoms."

Kai grins. "Something I'll teach you, don't worry."

The door opens and Hugh walks in with his guards. Kai's already standing, so I get up off the sofa. While we're in private company, we don't need to bow or curtsey, but standing up is the least I can do as he's still the king of my country, regardless of my marriage or position in his family. 

For twenty-one years, I lived as a normal person, being educated and eventually working (though not for long before I met Kai and he got me pregnant) under King Hugh's country, and I see myself working as a princess and duchess – and soon, queen – for his family as a sort of thank you. That, and a consequence of having a one-night stand with Kai without protection.

I'm an idiot and always have been. Though thanks to my stupid actions that night, my life has turned out for the better, so I can't really complain.

As Hugh comes over and hugs me, I notice how pale and washed-out he looks. His eyes are usually full of light and happiness, but now they look dull and spooked. He's in on himself a little, and I swear he's just... not himself. The King looks sick; he mentioned heart issues and wanting to retire are his reasons for abdicating, but he never looked sick. Until now.

"Dad," Kai greets.

Hugh's face relaxes and melts when he sees Emma sleeping in the sling. Her snores fill the room for a few seconds while her grandad fawns over her.

After a few moments, he invites us all to sit down. Kai carefully unhooks Emma so she's sleeping against his chest in his arms. It's the most precious image ever, so I get my phone out and snap a photo. Kai's stubble is still growing a little to match his dark hair, which is close to flopping over his eye. He's due to have a haircut tomorrow anyway as we're due back out for British engagements in a few days. I kinda like this look, though.

"It's going to be a quick meeting," Hugh says, snapping me out of my daydream. "I'm due with the Prime Minister in half an hour." He's referring to his weekly meeting with the Prime Minister – every week, the reigning monarch and the Prime Minister in seat will meet. Kai told me they talk political issues, and while the monarchy as a whole – and me since I joined, even though I used to have a point of view as a member of the NHS – remain impartial, the monarch can advise and warn when necessary, if it's in the people's best interest. The meetings always remain private.

"What's going on, Dad?" Kai asks. "Where's Mum?"

Hugh sighs. "Your mother is hosting an audience with Kenya's Prime Minister via video call right now. I need to speak to you both as my son and daughter-in-law and also as next in line to the throne."

Kai glances my way, and I can tell he's nervous. He's sitting on his own, and with Emma, so I can't go over and hug him right now.

"As you know, I'm abdicating in two months so I can retire, but it's mainly because of my heart issues."

"Sure," Kai says.

Hugh nods and sighs again. "So, I've been receiving care for the past few weeks as it got worse. I needed to have some tests done, a few scans and what have you. With you both going to Egypt, and the headlines going around, I haven't told you about it."

Kai shakes his head and silently, gestures for me to come and take Emma. In a very silent and calm manoeuvre, I take her in my arms. He's nervous right now. I'd offer Hugh his granddaughter, but the serious nature of this visit doesn't feel right.

"Dad, what the hell?" Kai asks.

"It turns out... I will have to abdicate sooner than expected," Hugh says and sits forward in the seat. There's a small bead of sweat running down his head; he's sick. I noticed it when he walked in, and now I can see it even more. "I have a more serious heart issue and will need to abdicate the throne. I can put it off for a couple of weeks while we iron out the details."

"You're scaring me," Kai says to his dad.

I shuffle myself to a better position while Emma stirs ever so slightly. Swift and careful, I take the baby sling off Kai.

"I'll take her," Hugh says.

I nod and let him take his granddaughter. "She'll be hungry when she wakes up properly."

"I won't keep you long. Kai, listen to me. My heart issues are caused by a heart tumour."

That bad aura takes over from earlier. I knew something would happen, and like a thief in the night, it comes and steals my breath and logical thinking. My blood drains until I'm sitting on the sofa. Tumour. That means cancer. Cancer.

Everything suddenly feels too itchy, too built up on a bad feeling that my breath comes harder. This isn't good. This is bad. Kai's dad has cancer; the king has cancer.

I'm going to be queen. Sooner than I thought. My face is already still in the headlines for puking in Egypt amongst all the other stupid shit I've done, and now it's going to be in there even more.

Everything is building up on top of one another like bricks making a building. Soon enough it'll all crumble and it'll be worse than ever. But for now, I have to deal with it.

"What the—"

Hugh nods. "So, there are two types of heart tumours. One is benign and non-cancerous. The other type is cancer. Cancerous tumours in the heart give around six months life expectancy after surgery, while benign ones can just be taken out and forgotten about. Of course, those are just numbers, and people can exceed those all the time."

Kai's head cocks. "And yours is benign, right?"

Hugh shakes his head. "They found the tumour, and unfortunately, it's malignant. It's cancerous."

Kai shoots up from the sofa and moves to the window. It looks out over the greenery of Windsor Castle. The lush greenery has always kept me grounded in the past couple of years I've been here, and Kai always used to call me cute for admitting it. I wonder if now he's seeing the value and peace in green.

"Hugh, I—" I stop, unsure what to say as my father-in-law and king rocks Emma in his arms. She's woken up and playing with his nose as we silently converse.

"My surgery will be soon, but I'm looking at a month so I can sort out the paperwork to abdicate, talk to parliament, deal with everything that needs to be dealt with."

"Surely, you can do all of that after surgery. Surely surgery is the most important," I mention.

Hugh shakes his head. "They can fit me in, in two weeks."

Kai spins around to look at me before his father. "Then get in there, Dad. Don't worry about the paperwork. Mum and I can sort it out."

Hugh sighs. "You don't want this role, Kai—"

"It's not that I don't want it, Dad. I don't feel prepared."

I stand. "Hugh, you need the surgery. It gives you the best chance. What matters now is getting it out. Take the treatment to give you the best chance at living a long life as a father and grandfather."

"I can't leave the crown—"

"We'll take it now, whenever you want." Kai wipes his eyes. Clearly, what Hugh and I said gave him the push he needed.

I move over to him and squeeze his hand. "Kai, think this through."

"I don't need to think it through. Take the earliest surgery slot they'll give you, Dad. Whenever you want, we'll ascend the throne. We just—have news ourselves."

Hugh stands and puts Emma on the floor. She crawls over towards us, so Kai picks her up and puts her on his hip.

"What's that?" Hugh asks.

"While we were in Egypt, we found out I'm pregnant again," I say.

Hugh grins. "I'm going to be a grandad again?"

Kai nods. "If things turn out, yes. But, Dad, please, take the damn surgery. Don't delay it because you think I don't want this. This is my duty. I'll do whatever it takes for the country and you. Mainly you."

Hugh sighs and looks between us before nodding. "Okay. I'll take some time to let you deal with the news, and for me to sort things out before letting you know."

I glance between my husband and father-in-law before really taking this in. Within nearly two years, I've gone from being a nurse and part of a small, loving family to being pregnant by a prince in disguise, and now here I am, my husband about to ascend the throne – making me a queen consort – and my father-in-law has cancer. 

Not only that, but my face is constantly in the headlines for doing something stupid, and now it's going to be in there even more. I'm not made for being a monarch, but I'm going to have to become better and stop making myself look stupid and doing idiotic things – like puking in the middle of priceless artefacts.

Here we go, I guess. I seem to always deal with things all at once, and this time is no different. 

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