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We don't talk about my update schedule lmao
It's long and shit... happens so good luck lol

WHAT HE DID (1/2)
(ALT NAME: BLONDE BITCHES)

"Don't fucking talk to me. Don't even fucking call me Leo. It's Jace." He growls out, grabbing his wallet and keys.

My face falls as I sit up and lean against my headboard, my eyes failing to see him correctly through the blur of tears. His keys are jangling as he rushes over and grabs his black backpack from next to my closet.

"what?" I mumble, barely audible as I pull my shirt over my knees, feeling vulnerable. "You're such a stupid fucking bitch..." he says with an evil chuckle and a tear slips from my eyes, I wipe it quickly though. This can't be happening...

"What are you saying?" I ask, standing up and blocking his way out. I push my body against the door and he leans over me. His hand is holding him up as he leans against the door, his head above mine as his eyes sparkle.

"I fucking know, Rox. Why the fuck didn't you tell me?!" He screams, his eyes blank and full of anger as he hangs above me.

Rox...

It isn't like how it used to be, when he would yell and scream if somebody called me Roxy other than him. I was ROXY to him...

ROXY!!!

The last time he got angry at me he was in second grade. Me and Rose went into his room and messed with his candy stash.

He got in trouble.

He never got angry at me again... until now I guess.

"What do you mean..?" I ask, furrowed eyebrows trying to think of anything that could possibly make him this angry, Anything that I didn't tell him, Anything anybody didn't tell him. I can't think of it...

"Yea fuck that, Rox. I know! Stop fucking pretending and let me out!" He leaves the door and starts pacing around my room.

"No! Not until you tell me what's happening!" I scream, knowing nobody is in the house.

He scoffs, shaking his head before turning to me and slowly walking towards me slowly, ever so slowly. When he makes it to me, towering over me just like everybody else. A haze casted over his face as I feel helpless and alone.

I'm not scared of him hurting me.... I'm scared of losing him for something I didn't know I did.

I didn't accidentally fuck his best friend I'll tell you that.

I didn't run into his super secret mafia-style drug stash and use it all.

I didn't die!?

"You wanna know something that I didn't tell you? You wanna feel like I do? Well let me tell you that when I kissed you at the beach house and told you all those stupid fucking anecdotes about how I liked you, they were all lies!" He screams and I gulp.

He's just angry... he's just saying this because he's angry! Yea!! It's okay!! I'll get my baby back!

but he continues....

"When I told you I loved you it was a lie! When I told you you were beautiful it was a lie! I just wanted to get one of the last girls on my list in bed and look at us now, it happened. So if you could please fucking move-"

"Is that true?" I mumble and he quirks an eyebrow, trailing his tongue along his top teeth. "The one piece of truth I've said." He says and I push him away.

"Why would you do that!" I scream, pushing him and slapping his chest over and over again as many times as I can, but it doesn't faze him. "I did everything for you! I just wanted you to love me! What did I do?!" I cry.

"When you're as hot as me you get everything easily, I wanted a challenge and what about my sisters best friend! Perfect. And it's just a plus that you have daddy issues, gave me reasons to take you over to my place way too often." He says, pulling a shirt over his head before picking his stuff up again.

It was a lie...

It was a fucking lie...

IT WAS A LIE!?!

he's not just angry anymore....

My tears fall over my face in endless streams as I hyperventilate. I can't breathe. Anything that's in my lungs isn't working.

Leo scoffs, throwing me my inhaler like trash as I fall down my wall. Using it barely helps. Nothing will help. It hurts....

It hurts so bad it feels like I'm being burnt by everything I touch, by existing I'm in flames and not the stupid ones in books. Real flames...

He leans on the wall, waiting for me to move but I don't. I can't.  He leans down, his hand pushing up my chin as he stares at me. I shut my eyes, full of pain and heartbreak. I can't look at him.

what did I do??

"What do you want me to say? That I used you for the sex and I finally got what I wanted, but it wasn't even that good? That I'm a senior and I love a sophomore, because that's fucking pathetic. How about I needed to check the last girl off of my list of the entire school and you just happened to take a pretty long time to get slutty? Do you want me to say that all you are to me is my little sisters best friend!? I doubt you can even talk though, you've had a crush on me since you were five. But guess what.. I never loved you, Rox. I never will. I never have. And anybody.. anybody who says that they love you? Is lying." He speaks with certainty. I would say that I could tell he was lying, but maybe my senses are switched if this was the only thing he was telling the truth on.

What was I supposed to say?

I don't know if anybody loves me.

He's right.

He was supposed to be the one person I knew loved me..

I look at my bare legs and try to control my breathing, tears uncontrollable and my heart pounding out of my chest. "This can't be real..." I mumble and he growls. "It is. You should've known if you hurt someone you'd get hurt back. You think maybe your dad would've taught you better.. oh wait yeah.. you fucking killed him." He says and I growl.

"You know I didn't kill him! I didn't ! I didn't.." I cry, my hands going into my hair as I scream. "I didn't!!"

"Keep crying. It's all you ever fucking do anyway-"

"Fuck you, Jace!"

He scoffs as he rips open the door.

"You already did..."

He could leave now, but he stands there for a second as though he wanted to rewind and redo everything. Regret is painted on in way too thick of a layer...

"I never want to look at you again..." I mumble, hoping him hearing my voice will make real him come back.

He looks at me and swallows. "It would be embarrassing to fall in love with you.." 

He made eye contact with me.. and was able to say that.

This isn't a dream..

This is real..

And he leaves... He was my way out. He was my happiness. He was my way to love... he was the only guy who ever loved me other than my dad and he's gone...

He's right.

I'm just a fucked up girl with daddy issues.

So happy birthday Jace, welcome to the story of what you did, and what I didn't do.

:;

LEO'S POV

6:43 AM, BEFORE ROXANNE WOKE UP.

I groan, hearing the phone go off from downstairs and I'm thankful that Roxy is a heavy sleeper. I move my arm out from under her beautiful body, watching her peaceful face as she smiles softly in her sleep.

I loved her.. I really did. Every moment of every day I thought of her.. of her face and her smile and her heart..

And the way she made me feel.. waiting for her to touch me again so I could get those butterflies. I don't think they'll ever go away..

I smirk back, walking quietly downstairs to answer the phone is whoever keeps calling would stop. "Hello..." I growl through the phone and I here my mothers familiar sigh of relief. "Thank god you finally answered... honey I need to tell you something."

"Happy birthday to me..." I mumble and she groans, "Oh my god! I'm sorry I forgot to say it honey I've just got a lot on my mind and me and your father are pretty nervous.."

"For what?" I ask quietly, not wanting to wake up Roxy with my confusion as the sun starts coming up, painting the sky with beautiful colors that the grey clouds cover.

"Well, 18 years ago... you weren't in our arms..." My mom says and my eyebrows furrow. "What do you mean?" I ask and she swallows loudly, nervously. "honey... 18 years ago your father and I thought that he was... infertile..." she says and I laugh. "Well you have me so you obviously weren't."

"Honey you're not getting it..." she says and I furrow my eyebrows, seriousness washing over me as I thunk of an idea of where this could be going.

"Mom tell me in a way that isn't so fucking cryptic." I huff and she breathes out a ragged breath into the phone.

"You were adopted when you were 1 and a half." She says slowly and my grip loosens so much I almost drop the phone. "What? Why did nobody tell me..."

"I'm sorry sweetie! We weren't allowed until you were 18-"

"This is so fucked up-"

"I'm sorry!"

"All I've told you every time we talked, whether it was about Roxy, Rose, whatever the fuck, I said the most important thing to me was my family. You weren't even mine to call family!"

"Yes we are!-"

"You lied-"

"I'm sorry, sweetie!" She cries and I huff.

"I'll see you after school, I just... why didn't Roxy tell me?!" I ask, my grip on the phone tightening so much, "She didn-"

"We told each other everything! And all I get was that it was a lie!? Fuck that... fuck her."

Thinking back I shouldn't have done it, something that would ruin my life and even in that moment I knew it wasn't a good idea. But I kept going. I said this because I felt betrayed, I learned that my family isn't my real family. She was the only one I knew that I could confidently say truly loved me. But she knew. I just kept thinking that she knew and my family wasn't just the lie but she was too. So I wanted to give her a taste of her own medicine...

I can't deal with it... her tears from me. Me, one of, maybe the only, person she trusted with everything. Except the thing most important to me...

She looked at me like I had broken every inch of her heart, every part of her soul, everything..

"I never want to look at you again.." she mumbles and my heart burns, my face turned away from hers. She lied to me about my one fear coming true, all I wanted was my family to be safe and now they aren't even mine.

She's not mine if my family isn't..

"It would be embarrassing falling in love with you.." I mumble, my chest hurting when the words come out but I don't stop them.

The way she looked.. when I said it.

The way I watched the goosebumps rise on her skin.

The way I watched her eyelids droop, her mouth drop, her hands clench..

I wanted to fix it. I wanted to take it all back. But I can't..

Instead, I leave, walking down the steps and not thinking about the future or remembering how I was supposed to drive her to school.

But now we'll go back to present tense when I didn't know what was going to happen in the next few days, and I didn't know I had forgotten to take Roxy to school, the one responsibility I had.

My grip is harsh on the wheel and my heart is racing. Fuck her. Fuck everybody. She's not my girlfriend anymore.

fuck she's not my girlfriend anymore...

Yea! She's not my girlfriend anymore! Im free, I can go fuck Sally Haine for all I care. In fact.. I will!

Fuck her! She lied to me.

I speed up, my normally perfect driving not perfect anymore as I stare at the road. Because after fights and when I got angry I would think of her, how everyone thinks their brown eyes are a disgusting brown but hers... they shine in every light like they were melted chocolate and pure sunshine. Her fluffy brown hair was beautiful and when she put it up into a bun, when it wouldn't get into her face per se, that was the best.

She was so beautiful...

And I told the most self conscious person I know that I lied to her every time I said that.

To think that with hours before I was telling her how I'd never leave her.

NO! Fuck her, you're allowed to be selfish sometimes.

You're always selfish!

I pull over to the side of the road, punching my dash board over and over as I turn off my car. I lean back, my head going up and looking at the top of my car.

I'm fucking angry at her, and I hate her so much... I hate my entire family so much for not telling me... but I still love her and I wish I didn't. So I'm stopping it...

I'm done loving her. I'm so fucking done.

I scream at the top of my lungs, banging my head against the steering wheel and wishing I could scream in the rain, fall on the wet ground next to my car and just lay there until the sun went up.

I turn my car back on, driving quickly to my home and changing to my motorcycle, not talking to my mom who I hear rushing down here.

When she gets there, I'm gone. I drive to school, going into my spot I go in every time and watching the girls as they walk over, but there my perfect target is.

She's leaning against her black Suv, her blonde hair fluffed and pushed back with a headband. I grab onto her waist, feeling the soft pink fabric of her tank top under my hand as I push her onto me.

My lips smash onto hers as she melts into my touch, I smirk confidently against her lips before pulling back and winking, flashing the "call me" symbol while I walk backwards and onto the sidewalk.

I walk into school, my hands in my jean pockets, the smell of yesterday's sex hanging off of me as I walk to my locker and find another blonde lady waiting at her locker.

I twist her hips toward me and quirk an eyebrow, she bites her lips as I lean in and kiss her, pushing her against my closed locker as I feel a slap on my back.

I pull back, heavy breaths as I look with tired eyes to Reed. "Fuck off." I mumble before going back to the retched kissing.

He pulls my shoulder back and huffs. "Haze is taking Rose on a fucking DATE!-"

"Did you know?" I ask, interrupting him.. he sighs, immediately understanding, "Jace-"

"No. Fuck off." I say, waving my hand as he sighs.

He looks around before grabbing my head and leaning in. "Don't go down a spiral asshat. You're a good guy don't fall into the trap of not being one." Reed says before pushing me back into the girl.

I huff. "Sorry about that..." I mumble, leaning in and pecking her lips again.

"Call me Leo.." I mumble and she giggles family, twirling her hair in her finger and sticking her boobs out to impress me.

At least it's not an ass this time...

"Okay, I'm Sophie." She says and I smirk.

"You wanna go to the bathroom with me, Sophie?" I ask with a quirked eyebrow and she laughs... "Sure, Leo..."

:;

"Why was I called to the office?" I ask Ms Mal and she has shaky hands. She leans in close, looking around before growling.

"I know every single fucking thing about Rox you douchebag so take that phone and answer your poor mothers' phone call right in front of me so I know what the fuck you did." She growls and I scoff, shaking my head and grabbing the phone from her desk before holding it to my ear.

"Hello?" I ask, bored. "Thank god! Leo baby, we just got a call that Roxanne wasn't at school since Jemma is her first contact and... you took her to school right? It was just a mistake?"

"No, why? She can walk herself." I huff and I hear Omar's cries from the other side of the phone.

"We gotta go! We gotta go get my baby girl!" Omar's muffled cries as my mom's breathing is heavy.

"Why did you do that?!" My mom screams and I shrug, "I was angry at her.." I mumble, "Like how I'm angry at you, so if I could get back to class-"

"YOU LEFT HER THERE?!" My mother's scream hurts my eardrums and the phone was taking from her hand roughly.

"Jace, you know I would forgive you for anything you did, but Roxanne did nothing-! Why were you angry at her when she didn't know!"Omar cries and my heart drops.

"what...?" I ask, my cool-guy charade falling immediately, my voice dropping into one full fo emotions... whether they're good or bad...

"Jemma start the car," she says urgently off of the phone before coming back. "What I mean is she never knew! Everybody else but her knew, Jace!"

my hands become sweaty, my heart pounds, and for some reason I can barely muster out a single word.

All I can do is replay every emotion I previously had, every single thing I said to her.

I said so much under the impression that she knew.. I was so angry.

She didn't know.. she didn't know what she did wrong or why I was yelling.. or why it all changed. She knew nothing..

She just knew I fucked her and then didn't love her anymore.

That it would be an embarrassment to fall in love with her.

oh god

"fuck..." I say and she cries harder, "whatever you did cant be worse than what's happening, My poor baby is probably being hurt right now!"

"What..?" I ask, still comprehending every word being said. Omar sobs into the phone, "Dave was coming over to get his stuff today and you left her there! You left her there all alone Jace!" Omar cries and my heart breaks a more than it already had.

I broke her and left her there for her murderous stepfather to find.

I'm the worst person I've ever known... I jumped to a stupid conclusion and got angry at everybody for lying to me instead of seeing the good...

I have a family that wanted me, that chose me.

"FUCK!" I scream, slamming the phone down and running out the door.

Tears stream down my face as I fumble for my keys in my pocket.

What's happening to her? Only a few fucking minutes from me shes alive with him and I don't know what's happening..

What if she got hurt?? I can't do it if she got hurt.. I can't do it without her..

I can't..

I can barely see, my vision blurry from tears knowing that she hates me, she doesn't want to see me, and I told her everything because I was angry and dumb.

I just want her to be safe now... please god... please...

I need her, even when I was driving here I knew that even if she hated me and never talked to me again that I would still see her.

What if she's gone...

what if she's out there and she avoids me? What if I don't get to see her.

What if I can't protect her from all of those stupid boys.. what if she gets a boyfriend and he comes over to hang out with her and Rose but Rose won't even let me in the room.

What if she doesn't love me anymore