18

ONE WITHOUT FLOWERS

Leo holds me down, his lips going behind my head as he kisses my head every time I wince as Lucio stitches my hand. "Fuck you lost a lot of blood Rox, you cut the place people cut when they try to kill themselves." He says and I look up at Leo, and blink at him.

And that's when it starts happening. "Leo.." I mumble, tears falling. "I'm scared..."

"I got you.." he mumbles. And I lose my ability to talk...

And soon after I lose sight...

And then a minute or two later... boom.

I don't remember it... but I know it happened.

"Will she remember any of this?" Rose asks and Lucio shrugs, "She probably won't remember any of this after Jace left the room to come get me. I put her on a lot of drugs.."

"You're so pretty.." I mumble to Leo.

He slowly whispers against my neck, "You are too... you're the most beautiful girl I've ever seen in my entire life, Roxy. I wish everyday and every time I looked at you I could say that."

he said it in front of all of them. he didn't care.

I felt at least a sliver of truth in that sentence because I felt it too.

There's no way to describe the intense feelings I get, I'm gonna be real I couldn't tell you. But all I can think when I look at him is 'oh my god he's so beautiful.' Or 'I wish I could just tell him I loved him' and when I hear him I think the same thing, even if I can't see him my excitement shoots up and all I want to do is cry in his arms all night about how much I love him.

Because I love him so fucking much and all I wanna do is scream it to him every second I can.

Rose nods, looking at me and Leo until he looks back at her.

She looks at him and me, her eyes flashing back and forth.

"I know.." she tells Leo and he stiffens.

"It's fine!" She interrupts before he can freak out, "I just don't want her to know which is why I'm saying it when she can't remember.... She's already so scared you'll have to leave her because of me And I'm not saying it to her too because I want you to make the right decision. I'm not gonna yell at you because I knew this was gonna happen, you're acting like I don't snoop through a lot of your stuff Jace. You might not have written it directly but I know how you talk about her-"

"I'm gonna fucking kill you-" he starts but he shakes her head, moving away but staring sternly at him. "Remember I'm letting you date my best friend."

"WHAT?!" Lucio yells as my eyes close, my mouth unable to open but I can still hear them all.

"In a second dad." Rose says, shushing him as he finishes up my stitches.

"What I want you to do is make the right decision, Jace." She says and he furrows his eyebrows.

"What do you mean?" He asks, his arms warm as he holds me close to him.

"I mean, Jace... that you need to tell her the truth about why you're not telling anybody."

"I am telling her the truth!"

"Oh really?! Or are you just scared that she doesn't love you as much as you love her?!" Rose points out and he huffs. "You don't know anything Rose."

"Oh really?! I  don't? Should I tell you about something you don't even know?"

"Rose that's enough!" Lucio says and she huffs, "Just know that I told you I know because I want you to make the right decision. Why aren't you telling people? Because you're scared? Or because you "
'don't want me to know'"

"You can't make me tell people!" He says and Rose laughs, "If you didn't that would just prove my point, Jace. You cant live your life scared that she doesn't love you like you love her because you know what would happen then? She's gonna forever think that you don't love her at all."

"What if I don't? Huh?" He asks and she growls, "then get the fuck out of my best friend's life.."

Wait what...

Does he love me or not?

Then it goes black.

When I wake up I remember nothing, but Leo is laying under me and Lucio is at my feet.

"Oh you're up.." he says, grabbing onto my hand and sighing.

"Rox.. your seizures came back.."

"I knew they would.." I mumble.

I remember the night before this still... though I wish I couldn't..

because it's what brought back my trauma induced seizures.

Dave held a knife to my throat.. while I sat alone with him at the dinner table. He threatened me dead...

"What happened?" Lucio asks and I slip a tear..

"Leo... can you leave the room."

And then I proceed to tell Lucio what happened in detail, and since I assume Jemma was a blabber mouth and already told him, I told him about the stress Leo put me through right afterwards too.

and then...

He told Leo in a fit of rage.

And instead of what I would expect old Leo to do... Leo who is trying to better himself just walked in and snuggled me. Whispering his sorrows in my ears.

—

I cant move my right hand as I snuggle into a really nice pillow. It was warm and soft and felt as though it held on to me too. "We should let them sleep in..." I hear a voice say.

"No fuck that maw." I hear Rose's familiar voice as I wrap my legs around the pillow, feeling it's hand-

Wait what the fuck...

Pillows DONT HAVE HANDS, ROXANNE!

I flip over as I feel the pillows hand on my butt, my hand killing me as I growl.

"What the hell happened!" I screech as I practically fly off of the bed. Once I see Leo's half open eyes and scrunched up, hurt face I calm down.

"Why did you run?" Leo asks as he motions for me to come towards him, his hands out in an 'I want that one' sorta motion. I smile as I slowly walk toward him and lay down on top of him, his arms wrapping around me as I mumble into his chest. "My hand hurts." He pushes his lips together and holds me as we stand up, picking me up and placing his hand on my butt as support. "You blacked out after I went to go get my dad, baby. It's all okay now, but you lost a lot of blood. You can still go to school if you feel up for it but I'd rather you stay home with me and work on my Econ." He says and I shrug. He leans in and kisses my earlobe. "Or maybe my sex Ed class-" he whispers and I roll my eyes.

"You don't even take that class anymore." I say and he sighs, "I've been caught!" I chuckle.

He looks over at the people by the door i completely forgot about and smiled. "What?" He asks, "I will only not go through my normal morning ritual of getting up if Roxy is hurting." He says and Rose rolls her eyes.

"Are you okay Rose?" I ask and she huffs, "it's tough to keep things from you, huh?"

She just chuckles and stares at Leo, her foot tapping as I stare between them. The tension rising.

"We just got in a fight last night, it's alright if Jace does what he's supposed to."

"You know I can't do that Rosie." He says, his hand rubs circles along my scalp.

"Then think again, what's stopping you? And what's so bad about saying that?!" She asks and his face goes stone cold.

"You weren't right, Rosie. I was, By saying I don't..." he stops when he looks at me, guilt and pain flashing through his eyes, "do what you thought I did too much of." He says, still looking at me.

"Then get out of her life!" Rose screams angrily and her moms eyebrows furrow. She doesn't know what's going on either. She just steps out of the room with her hands raised in surrender.

"That would hurt her more than it would hurt me." He says with a stiff, sharp face. His blonde hair falls in from of his face as I watch him with a lopsided smile, staring into his eyes for any hint of what's happening.

But all I get is that he's lying...

"He's lying about something I can tell-" I start but he drops me onto the bed with furrowed eyebrows. "Shut the fuck up, Roxy!" He screams.

My eyes begin to water as I look at him standing above me, a tear slipping down my cheek.

His face softens when he looks into my eyes, full of regret and empathy all over again. "I'm so sorry I didn't mean it, Baby." He says, leaning in and hugging me, holding me close as tears slip from my eyes and onto his shirt. Why is he calling me Baby in front of Rose?

"I'll give you this, Rose, I might... but I won't ever admit that to her, you, or anybody else." He says as he consoles me.

"Tell me more, Jace!" She pleads, "I'm begging for you to tell me what's so bad about people knowing?!" Shes completely confused, I can tell.

"I'll tell you later..." he says and she sighs. He looks up at her again and furrows his eyebrows.

"Leave."

Once she's gone, with the door closed of course, he immediately grabs my face and pulls my head back with watery eyes. "I'm so so so sorry, baby girl. I didn't mean it I promise." He says and I smile.

"Who were you talking about?" I ask and he shrugs, "Just a cousin, you wouldn't know her, she's on my dad's side."

"Oh..."

Weird.

"Well I wanna meet her soon." I say with a smile and he chuckles a little.

"I don't think so, she's kinda crazy."

I huff, "Okay.."

He leans in and kisses my lips.

I moan quietly, trying to be quiet while his head travels down my jaw and onto my neck, peppering kisses all over me.

"Leo...." I say and he smiles against the soft neck on my skin. His hand moves under my shirt and runs under my boob.

Just from this I feel my second heartbeat build up.

"Do you want me to make it up to you...?" He mumbles against my lip as he grabs my hips.

He lifts me up and leans against the headboard, placing his back against it and setting me down on his lap to straddle him. I feel his bulge under me and swallow.

"And how would you do that? Giving me a hickey?" I ask and he chuckles a little.

He runs his tongue along his upper set of teeth and watches me as he grabs onto my waist and presses me down on his bulge, moving my hips back and forth.

I moan, my head shooting back at the pleasure that fills me.

He smirks, having complete control over what I feel as his hands move down to the button on my pants. He unbuttons them and slowly wiggles them off of me.

He swallows as he looks at my white underwear, some of changing color to grey from the wetness seeping out of me.

"fuck.." he mumbles.

He slowly lowers his hands again, his thumbs dangerously close to my clit.

"Baby..." he mumbles, looking up at me and biting his lip as I try to push my legs together, searching for some type of satisfaction.

"Ugh... Lee..." I mumble and he laugh a little, pushing me down on his bulge again. I feel him twitching in his sweatpants as he rubs his thumbs in small circles on my lower stomach.

"Have you ever touched yourself before?" He asks and I swallow...

"I don't know.." I mumble, blushing and looking down at his shirt.

I lift up the bottom part of it, revealing his abs as I move my hips against him.

His head hits the headboard as his eyes look all over my face, his abs twitching and his breathing ragged as he holds in a moan.

"Fuck!" He says as he grabs my hips, "Oh my god..."

I bite my lip, letting out a small moan as he lifts me off of him a little. "Fuck you can't make me feel that good baby, I won't be able to help myself.."

He grabs onto my jaw and looks at me breathlessly.

"Cause I thought of you every time I jerked off, Roxy." He says.

I swallow, leaning down and kissing his lips lips.

"Did you think of me when you touched yourself, baby?" He asks, his fingers rubbing lightly over my clit.

I fall onto his chest, moaning and only thinking about one thing.

Leo was touching me...

"Yes..." I moan against his chest and he chuckles proudly. His hand leaving me as I whine. He flips me over, my back on his stomach as he rips my legs apart.

"You gotta be quiet okay?" He asks and I shake my head aggressively. He lets out a low chuckle at my neediness, his hand reaching down and going under my underwear.

His other hand grabs onto my boob as he looks at my face with lust.

His fingers start to play with my clit as I muffle my moan. "fuck.." he mumbles. His hand that was on my boob goes to his pants, where he starts lightly jerking himself off to my pleasure.

He inserts two fingers inside of me and I bite my lip, the little bit of pain slowly fading away. He pumps in and out of me as I shoot my head back to look at him, his toes curling.

I feel this pleasure build up through me as I moan, something running through my as I grab onto his dick to my left and jerk it for him.

He groans as I breathe heavily, my chest heaving upside down.

"Oh my god Roxy..." he mumbles, leaning down and kissing my forehead.

My breathing becomes ragged as he starts twitching under me. "Oh... fuck!" I say and he covers my mouth as I bite my lip, pleasure running through me as I orgasm.

My juices run down my legs, soaking his fingers.

"Fuck.. yes..." he moans, twitching as white streaks out of his dick, covering my fingers as I bite my lip.

I look up at him, jerking him through his high.

I bring my hand to my mouth, licking the white off of my fingers as he swallows, watching me with red lips and his eyes shining in blue and green.

"You're so beautiful..." he mumbles...

I love you, Leo...

:;

I enter the McClure house and to my surprise there is no Mrs McClure doing her favorite activity of cooking, I walk a little more forward and see a note on the stairwell.

'Work emergency!! Sorry loves but one of my neighborhoods a couple towns over caught on fire. Lucio will be home if you need him! Love you! - Jemma'

I huff, sad I didn't get to see her after breakfast this morning when it was mostly just me and Leo staring dreamily at each other.

I set my stuff down at the door and take off my shoes, running my fingers through my long brown hair as I walk upstairs and left, to where Leo's room is.

"Sorry I couldn't come home with you my mom wanted me to see Dave again-" I start until I hear a conversation coming from his room.

"I know I do! I know deep down, of course I love her! But I could never say that!" Leo's voice says and I furrow my eyebrows, who? I lean against the wall.

"Why?! That's all I want to know... or I'll tell her! I swear to god I will tell her!" Rose's voice plays with true anger.

"Because! She's the only one who gets me! What if I scare her off and I already told people and they all beat me down for falling in love with a girl so young! What if I have to see her leaning against walls being touched by some other guy! I can't fucking deal with that! The only thing worse than not having her before would be not even being apart of her life anymore.. and that's what could happen if I tell her. I can't live without her.."

"She loves you too! I would be one to know. She loves you too much for her own good. Ever since we were little I've known. I know that you to have kissed and by the way our guys look at each other and how you don't want anybody else touching her.... I just don't know how you can't understand... tell her."

"I will... I promise. After I tell her I'll start telling others too. I just need to know that she loves me for me—That she loves me at all. So many other girls just want me for my body and not me-"

"She's not them. Stop overthinking it."

"I don't wanna mess it up.."

"You won't, I promise. I know both of you so well, I just know, I can just feel it. I'll be the maid of honor and I'll hear your vows, 'Ro-"

"Hey guys!" I say as I burst into the room. Rose's face is completely calm but Leo's isn't. He's obviously red and I come up to him and run my fingers through his hair.

You're so beautiful Lee.

"What's wrong? What are you guys talking about?" I ask and Rose rolls her eyes, "My partner couldn't come over so Jace is helping me run lines for my English class," She says and I chuckle. "What play?" I ask, looking at Leo and still see him completely flustered.

"One without flowers..." he mocks with a chuckle, knowing I wouldn't care about it if it didn't have flowers, kissing my forehead like he did when we weren't dating.

"It's Romeo and Juliet." Rose says and Leo nods.

I nod, pressing my lips together at the tension in the room.

"It's dinner night." I say and he growls, "If I see Dave punch your arm as 'discipline' one more time I'm gonna kill him." He says and I smile. "Please do."

"Rose wanna go get ready?" I ask and she nods, walking out as I follow her. "Can I steal your clothes?" I ask and she nods, obviously flustered from the play.

Haze comes out of his room and smiles at us. "Where have you been these past few days?" Rose asks and Haze chuckles, "I went to go see my grandma in Lindari. Sorry I didn't tell you." He says with a chuckle and I shake my head, "It's fine, but get ready, it's your first dinner party!" I say as I laugh.

"You're gonna hate it!"