I hope everyone had a great Christmas, for those who celebrate!

Here is a sad update for you all (I'm sorry). 💜

"Here, let me help you babe." My hand gripped his waist as my other hand gripped his left hand. He shakily walked towards the bed, his feet practically dragging on the floor. I set him down on the bed as we both released a breath we had been holding. He took a small sip of water before I helped him lean back against the soft pillows I had brought from home. I tucked the blanket around his frail body, pecking his forehead.

"Are you comfortable?"

Hoseok nodded, no smile on his lips. "Thank you, Yoongibear."

"Of course, my love." I squeezed his hand with a soft smile.

He reached up to scratch his head, a chunk of hair falling onto his fingertips. He stared at the hair in his palm with a frown. His watery eyes met mine. "H-How can you stand to look at me with such fondness in your eyes? I-I'm losing my hair, I can barely eat anything so I'm skin and bone. I'm absolutely hideous."

I cupped his cheeks with my hands and kissed the tip of his nose. "My beautiful Hoseokie, I could look at you for the rest of my life, no matter whether we're both old and senile, smelly, with wrinkles and white hair. I don't care whether you are losing your hair. I don't care that you're losing weight. All I care about is that the beautiful smile of yours remains the same, and that the strength that you have inside continues to shine."

Hoseok's tears fell down his cheek as he leaned forward, pecking my lips. "You are too perfect."

I shrugged. "I won't deny it."

He chuckled for a second before he started coughing, unable to stop. I worryingly (is that a word?) ran out to the nurses station for help, rushing back into the room to find blood dribbling down his chin and onto his gown.

The nurse helped to clean him up, getting him settled back into bed once more. She handed him an oxygen mask to wear, hoping that it would help him breathe better.

"I'm going to give an update to the doctor. She should be in soon to tell you if there is anything we need to do!" And with that, the nurse left, leaving Hoseok and I alone again.

His eyes were wide as he breathed into the mask. His hand searched blindly for mine, and I smiled weakly as I reached for his hand, gripping it with all of the love and support I could manage.

••••••

A knock on the door woke me up from my rest, and I opened my eyes slowly to see the doctor walking in and standing next to my bed. She gave me a small smile before facing Yoongi to bow slightly to him.

"We will need to run some tests," she began, "but I believe Hoseok has somehow gotten an infection. It could be something to do with the lungs, and that is why he was coughing up blood."

I nodded, seeing the solemn look on Yoongi's face. His face dropped even more with the doctor's next set of recommendations.

"It's time for us to decrease his risk of infection by making visitors wear more protection. Yoongi, this means that whenever you are here, you will need to put on a mask and gloves that will be placed outside, and keep them on until you leave the room. We need to minimize his access to infectious diseases from the outside world. Leukemia already affects the blood, which in turn can affect the immune system, but the heavy dosages of chemotherapy make him have virtually no immune system. We should've added more protection once he was diagnosed, but didn't see the reason to until now, since he's sick."

"S-So... now I can only hold him or kiss him through gloves or a mask? I can't feel his skin under my fingers anymore, or his lips against mine?" Yoongi's voice cracked, and he obviously tried to hide it with a cough.

The doctor shook her head. "I'm sorry, but for now that is what we must do."

I reached for the oxygen mask around my mouth and pulled it down. "And what do we do after that? There must be more besides just the chemo."

The doctor's worried eyes met mine before she nodded, unable to meet my eyes again as she spoke. "One of the methods that has been proven to work for your type of cancer is a transplant. A bone marrow transplant."

"I-Isn't bone marrow, like, the stuff inside of your bone?" Yoongi asked, his face looking as if he ate a bad bite of food, his nose scrunched up in distaste.

"Yes. It is very painful, and I will be honest, it is hard to find a donor, but, I think we should put you on the transplant list now and start looking for someone to match."

"C-Can you test me to see if I'm a match?" Yoongi spoke up immediately, his hand giving mine a squeeze.

"Babe, you don't have to go through that pain for me."

He shook his head, his gaze intense, but showing every ounce of love. "I will do whatever I can to get you better and to get you to come home to me." His hand found my thinning hair and soothed it down the way I like it.

"We will have you tested, but it will be very hard to believe if you are a match. Typically, the ideal match is a family member, although sometimes none of them match, or refuse to donate, making us use an outside source. Bone marrow is not something that is donated much, due to the sheer pain it brings to even get tested."

I saw Yoongi swallow harshly as he nodded, giving me a beautiful gummy smile as the doctor walked out.

"We're going to get you better, Hobi. I promise you, we will do everything we can."

I smiled, genuinely, and slid my oxygen mask off and motioned for him to bend down. He did so, leaning close snough for me to peck his lips before I settled back into the mattress, oxygen mask on.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, the biggest I could take, and reopened my eyes to see my boyfriend staring at me fondly.

"Yoongi."

"Yes, baby?"

I took another deep breath with my eyes closed. "I-I-I think it's time for us to shave my head."

•••••