That night I laid awake in my bed for the third time this week. The sheets always seemed to be too damn rough on my skin or someone- not going to point fingers- decided to drag their claws down my back. I wore my red sleeping shirt and my black night pants and both seemed to be the hottest pieces of clothing I owned whenever we had to head to bed. During the evening I was comfortable but the minute my head hit the pillow it was as if someone decided to turn the heat up to over a hundred. The worst part was it made me sweat and I was always embarrassed about doing so because there was never any privacy if you catch my drift. Me and Kyoya always purchased the cheapest rooms that they had so that we would have enough for food, rent, and repairs if necessary. This was all fine in till you come to realize that the rooms only come with one bed and one bed meant that we both had to share. Kyoya refused to sleep on the floor and whenever I offer to I could always see that it brought displeasure into his eyes making them turn a grey color. So being the gullible person I am always shrugged it off and sleep next to him so he would be able to sleep without the guilt of throwing me out of the bed we both paid for.

So all in all I was lying next to the one person who made me melt inside. Their body so close I could feel the heat it gave me and I could hear his sweet breathing as he dreamed of things that made him happy, if there was anything that could make him happy. The problem is I was sweating like a marathon runner when all I was doing was laying down and starring at the ceiling counting the headlights of cars that rushed past out window. I sighed deeply before turning onto my side so I could see the waves of Kyoya's hair that went over his frail shoulders and a little past his middle back. He had always had such thick hair that curled slightly on the bottom whenever it got wet but he always made sure to straighten it to hide it. The long green locks seemed to glow against the light that came through the window from cars and a street lamp that struggled to reach our apartment on the other side of the street. His hair ended at his lower back which was exposed because he had the sheet only at his hips that looked like mountains against his thin waist. My eyes slowly went from his shoulders, to his waist, then slowly traced his hips so that I could almost paint a mental picture by the way his night pants hung loosely.

His tan skin looked to be more of a crème color against the white sheets. I closed my eyes as my face heat up slightly trying to focus on going to sleep and not my vulnerable friend who slept soundly beside me. Kyoya had always been a deep sleeper which meant sleeping in a strange place was easy for him but for me it seemed to only get harder with each crappy motel we visited. My eyes flashed open as I felt him move before pressing my lips so hard together that they must have been nothing more than a thin line. His nose was inches from mine and the smell of mint was still fresh on his breath from when he had brushed his teeth for bed. His bangs hung over his eyes that were closed softly making his eye lashes appear longer than they did when he was awake. His face was softer when he was asleep but then again it is hard not to look innocent when no one can see what you look like during the day. His jaw wasn't tight like it usually was and his eyelids shielded his intense blue eyes that to many- even to me- seemed lifeless when he spoke. His cheeks were flushed from sleep and his lips were full as his chest slowly moved up and down as he breathed.

'Aw shit. Abort mission! Abort! Abort!' I thought and tried to roll on my side but stopped as I felt something soft lightly brush my arm and I turned to see blue eyes staring at me. My throat tightened as his eyes wandered for a moment aimlessly as sleep slowly disappeared allowing for him to focus onto me once more. "Benkei? Where are you going?," he asked in a small voice before yawning. I smiled a little at the small voice he used only when he was tired but honestly I don't think that he was trying to be whiny but to me it was a whole new side of him that only I could see. His cheeks flushed redder as he rubbed one of his eyes before slowly sitting up so that he hung over me slightly so that he could stare onto my face. His hair draped over his face and curls danced around his shoulders as I felt his hot breath on my face making my heart skip beats as I stared up at him. What would it be like to kiss those lips? I blushed slightly at the thought and tightened my lips once more as I felt my slight excitement grow.

"Kyoya buddy," I said as if I were short of breath and he looked down at me for a moment before shaking his head making more wild curls drape around his shoulders. God, he seemed flawless, even his scars that he always looked as a mark of failure only made me think that my Kyoya was one of a kind. The only problem he was never mine and never would be as long as I was who I was and I was something that could not be changed. "I thought you were asleep. I was going to get some fresh air," he cocked his head to the side and slowly pulled back, his hand slowly ran a crossed my arm and my heart skipped a beat as he slowly looked over his shoulder. I could see the suspicion in his eyes and that made me fear that maybe he could hear my heart beating in my chest like hammer to a nail. Man, How much I would pay to nail him! I blushed at my own joke and quickly shook my head trying to shake any thoughts of such exotic things out of my mind because I haven't even told him, and I didn't plan to.

"I will go out with you," he said and I was snapped out of my thoughts by his sudden request as he stood up to pull on a hoodie and brush his hair. I watched him slowly pull on his black hoodie that he always carried with him in case of emergency and by emergency I mean his clothes went against dress code. I sighed as I slowly got up 'Great! Now I have to go and exercise, in the cold' I sighed as I pulled on my jacket and looked over at Kyoya who had his hood up to cover up his wild mess of a mane. I smiled as I slowly opened the door trying not to be too stiff because for some reason I felt nervous to walk beside him but even more nervous behind him. He must've noticed my weird migration pattern because he stopped suddenly underneath the street lamp forcing me to stop beside him. "Benkei what's going on? You're acting like you're an really bad undercover cop," I stared at him funny for a moment, "You look like a dumbass."

"Oh," I said beside myself and he rolled his eyes a little and at that moment I wish that I could find a hole big enough to hide in and die in but that wasn't likely. Considering the fact that we were downtown in a broken down street the closet thing I could find would be a pot hole and I wasn't in the mood to be hit with a car this evening or at the very least not right now. "Sorry it just comes naturally," I said before I could stop myself, he looked at me from behind his bangs that had fallen and I thought that I could almost see a glimmer in his eye. I guess that was another one of my talents, taking all of the negatives people say and turning them back around by joking along. After traveling around so long you learn that most of what you say doesn't matter because you would most likely see that person once anyway so why not try and stay in a good mood. It grew silent as we walked down the street, I was too nervous to think of something to talk about and Kyoya didn't look like he had any intention in starting the conversation. 'How original...' I thought as I looked around for anything of the slightest interest to fight off the awkward silence between the both of us.

Well it seemed awkward to me but to Kyoya this must feel pretty normal to him. I guess that already proves how awkward I tend to be in public situations and another thing to add on to 'my things I really need to work on list' but I knew I would never get around to changing anything other than maybe my clothes. "Why did you need to get some air?," Kyoya eventually said which took me by surprise since he rarely spoke unless it was about Gingka or about his newly scheduled rematch that we always seemed late for. I blushed slightly as I thought of the way my heart pounded while my lip pursed in resistance against his vulnerability. "It was stuffy in the room," I answered a little too quickly which made him look over his shoulder at me with the look of suspicion. My body went numb as I felt he could read my thoughts and mimic every move I was about to make without the slightest hesitation. "Then why didn't you just open the window?," he asked in a sarcastic tone that brought a flush to my face because that was a question that I wasn't going to be able to answer.

"You didn't have to come with me Kyoya," I said making him slowly look away so that his hood could hide anything that could give me a clue to how he felt or what he was thinking. "I would've been fine on my own. Not that I wasn't happy that you wanted to come with me," I added the last part on quickly trying to explain that I needed him probably more than he is ever going to need me. I stopped, "Why did you come with me Kyoya?," I asked making his shoulders tense as he slowed down his pace so he was walking beside me and for a moment I could see that he was too asking himself the same question. His lips were tightly sealed while his eyes starred aimlessly as he thought about the question I asked him making me feel a little glad that I wasn't the only one who was socially awkward. I held my breath as I grabbed his arm and he stopped suddenly to look up into my eyes for a moment as I looked down at him, my cheeks burning as I did so. I have never been so embarrassed in my whole life and yet looking into his eyes I saw something behind that icy shield he mastered putting up in situations that involved real feeling.

"Benkei... You're hurting my wrist," he said as he looked away slowly as I slowly loosened my grip but didn't let go because I was afraid that if I did he would slip away like he was able to do before. I cringed as I remembered all that Doji had done to him and someday, I was going to get my turn old man. I knew that one day and one day soon that cactuses wouldn't be the only thing that he didn't like once I got done with him. "Benkei what has gotten into you all of a sudden? You've been acted weird all week," he said as he quickly pulled his wrist away as I starred at my empty hands that I had accidently dropped a priceless vase or had allowed a treasure to slip through my fingers. I already missed his warmth which was sad because my face burned so hot that I knew that whenever we got back to bed I once again wouldn't be able to sleep. "Are you going to answer me or not?," he snapped and my head pulled up in sudden interest because he voice strained and his eyes told me he actually wanted to know, he cared about how I felt?

"Sorry I've had a lot on my mind," I answered honestly because it was true I did have a lot on my mind and it didn't help that the thing that was on my mind happened to be next to me. I looked over at him again as he began walking making sure to go slow that I could join him anytime that I chose without getting lost or worse losing sight of him. It always amazed me how he could practically teleport everywhere when I took me almost half an hour to get up to the third floor by the spiral staircase at the hotel. "You never answered my question Kyoya," I said as I slowly joined him being sure this time to keep my distance and not migrate all over the map drawing attention. I looked down at him to see that he had tensed again which told me that he knew exactly what I meant which made me happy that he hadn't let the thought slip completely from his mind. I stopped as I saw the park which was abandoned because of the late hour and all the birds that woke me up so early in the morning were napping peacefully waiting for sunrise so they could wreak havoc once more.

"I'm not intending on answering it Hawana," he said using my nickname like he often did as a warning that I was pushing more than just a couple of his buttons. Normally I would back off being sure to give Kyoya a LOT of elbow room but today I felt like pushing a little bit farther because I needed to know. Just this once I needed something that couldn't breathe, eat, or even speak because all I needed from Kyoya was an honest answer. Sadly, honest and Kyoya never really are used in the same sentence unless Kyoya honestly lied or Kyoya isn't a maniac honest, always cross your fingers on that one. "I answered your question Kyoya, don't you think that it's fair to return the favor?," I asked while I looked up at the stars that shone bright in the sky and for a short moment I believed that anything was possible. If stars could shine then why couldn't I? Isn't that how we are supposed to think of ourselves?

"I just felt like walking is all," he said before looking up at the stars as well before walking over to a conveniently placed wooden bench that could use a paintjob as well as a cleaning. I followed taking my seat after Kyoya had leaned back to look up at the stars which shone in his eyes as he looked at each one as if giving them all his up most precious attention. Kyoya had always secretly enjoyed the stars, being sure to always find time to look out a window for a little while or to look at them while we laid in our camping arrangements. I never found any interest in the floating balls in the sky except that they were in fact lifeless things of gas that the bigger they were the brighter they seem to shine. Sometimes I wish that I could be like that. "The stars are beautiful tonight," I said trying to start conversation but mentally slapped myself afterward, 'The stars? Oh, come on who are you Gingka?,' I scowled myself looking around aimlessly as I had a mental argument with myself that seemed like it was going to be endless.

"Benkei can I ask you a question?," he asked for once instead of stating it like it was more of a statement than a question. I jumped a little at the sound of my name deciding that just this once it could be a draw if that pick up line was really the best thing I could think of or not. "Yeah, Kyoya pal," I looked over at him and his cheeks were slightly pink from the cold night air which was also beginning to get to my nose making it run a little. He looked down as he played with his fingers like he always did when he was nervous, which was near never! He had this strong belief that pride was enough to solve any problem- well most anyway- which meant that getting him to show anything other than the asshole side of him always proved a challenge. "Are we friends or are you still following me because you look at me like some kind of teacher?," he asked in a small voice that was different from his usually stern tone which alone was enough to make me stop and think about what I had to say.

This was a life or death situation! If I told him that we were friend he then surely would only do his best to push me away like he had done every other one of his "Friends", but if I say he is just a teacher I might as well take all my chances with him- though they are slim- and throw them down the nearest hole of broken dreams. In all honesty I wanted to be so much more than friends but I couldn't tell him that because then I might as well sign my will because surely he was going to throw a tantrum. "Why would you ask something like that?," I said and he quickly looked away being sure to use as much of his hair as possible to make a wall between us. "Of course were friends Kyoya, why else would I follow you? I do learn from you but that doesn't mean that I don't enjoy spending time with you. If I had it my way I would be with you in till the day we both die!," I stopped as I realized what I had just said making my cheeks turn fire red as he slowly stood up and looked away quickly so we didn't look into one another's eyes.

"I'm heading back," he said before beginning to the street, dragging his feet over the rough gravel making me realize he was waiting for me to follow. I closed my eyes before slowly standing so that I could follow the one person that I swore to protect and hold on to in till the day we both happen upon splitting paths. I slowly began walking being sure not to get too close so that he would happen to see me or where he would tense up and badly hide it. He was never as sneaky as he liked to think he was.

'Oh, Kyoya...,' I thought as I laid next to him in bed for the hundredth time, but still it never seemed to get any less exciting.