Chapter 12. The Emergency Ballet Escapade
The next hour flew by as Lilith prepared for their adventure: taking things out of her bag, dusting them off, and putting them back in. Ed's map of the garden, a pack of tissues, a journal, a pen, and The Hound of the Baskervilles, a corner still bent on page thirteen. She slung the bag over her shoulder and fixed her beret. It kept her thoughts together, making them work while she danced.
"How do I look?" Lilith spun in front of the mirror, not to make sure that she looked good, but to make sure there were no snags or creases. Her appearance had to be perfect because ballet demanded perfection, which is why Lilith loved it.
"Splendid, as always, madam." Panther yawned. "I thought we were supposed to get steak? About an hour ago?"
Lilith gave him the look.
"Women," he grumbled. "Dogs are where it's at. Take me, for example. I'm ready to go at a moment's notice, no need for excessive frills or thrills or-"
"I don't want to hear it. Who asked for a pink jacket?"
"Not pink. Rosy. Big difference."
"Whatever. Let's get out of here." Lilith patted her bag and marched to the door. "You know what I realized? I haven't had any time to read lately. It's dreadful, really. I should—" She stopped and twisted the doorknob. It was hopelessly and indisputably locked.
"Great."
"What is it, dear Holmes? Has your genius left you in tatters?" Panther scratched his back.
"Go on. Pretend like you remembered." Lilith peeked through the keyhole, studied the knob from the left, then from the right, leaning in so closely her nose touched it. "Why haven't I noticed before?"
"Noticed what?" Panther eyed the knob curiously.
"My dear Watson, surely you do not wish to tell me that you have not deduced a pattern to this mansion's behavior?"
Panther's fur covered his blushing.
Lilith motioned to the room. "It moves. It opens up in the morning and closes off at night, right?"
"And?"
"And." Lilith waited.
Panther looked genuinely puzzled.
"It behaves like a flower. It's a rose. No, it's a rosebush. One giant stone rosebush. Remember the heads?"
"I'm afraid this new concept is rather irrelevant to our current problem. Would you care to explain in more detail how it will help us open the door?" Panther scoffed, but Lilith was already off to test her theory.
She emerged from the bathroom, unceremoniously moved her pet aside, and upended a glass of water on the doorknob.
"Watch," she whispered.
They gaped at the knob. It was carved to resemble a bloom.
Nothing happened.
"Are we supposed to stare at it until we go blind?"
Before Lilith could answer, the knob shifted. It shuddered. It shook. It slowly sucked in every drop of water and began to unravel, petal by petal, turning at the same time. Another second and the door swung open.
They exchanged an astounded glance.
"Wicked! What did I say?" Lilith's heart raced.
"I bow to your genius, dear Holmes." Panther kneeled on his forelegs. "Please accept my apologies for doubting you."
"You're graciously forgiven, dear Watson. Now, please get up. You're embarrassing me."
They peeked out. The corridor was deserted. Servants were off packing roses for delivery. Guests hid from the rain in their rooms, gossiping and waiting for lunch. What else was there to do? Alfred's distaste for technology resulted in zero TVs and one ancient rotary phone that Gustav answered each time it trilled in the vestibule.
Elated by her discovery, Lilith couldn't wait to show her mother, to prove that she wasn't imagining things. She put down the empty glass.
"Where do you propose we go?" grumbled Panther.
"Out," said Lilith.
Panther took a few steps into the corridor and sat on his tail. "Okay, I'm out. What's next?"
"Can you please be quiet? We're supposed to—"
But what they were supposed to do, Lilith didn't get a chance to finish. Shuffling movement told them that Trude Brandt successfully eavesdropped on their entire conversation and prepared to make an entrance, or outrance, if such a word existed, to describe her hobble out of her room.
Lilith carefully clicked the door shut and they took off, running like two convicts escaping prison, stopping every few paces and pressing themselves into the wall, as if that made them invisible. Lilith desperately tried flattening her tutu, and Panther thought that by standing still he could pass for a statue.
Perhaps Trude changed her mind, as she never surfaced.
Their hearts drummed in unison. Any minute a guest could open a door and cause an end to their adventure. So far, they almost made it to the staircase and neither had the faintest idea of where they were going, when a shriek made them freeze. A long drawn-out string of German words followed.
Behind the nearest door a heavy body fell and fists pounded on the floor in rhythmic smacks. The voice belonged to either Daphne or Gwen, who performed a teenage tantrum.
"What's she saying?" Lilith stole a glance at Panther. He perked up one ear. Behind the door, Irma Schlitzberger proceeded to murmur something soothing to calm her daughter.
"I daresay, quite the demand. Sounds like one of the elephantine piglets wants your beret." He sniffed. "And if I were you, I'd step away from that door."
Crashing footsteps preceded furious twisting of the door's knob. Both the girl and the whippet took off, fleeing along the corridor, bypassing the staircase, and skidding to a halt by an empty room, its doorway yawning wide. Lilith grabbed Panther and ran in.
Without a beat, the door slammed shut and they sped upward. Lilith recalled her mother saying on the plane that Alfred's rose fertilizer laboratory took up an entire floor. The mansion had only three floors, not counting the tower in the middle. They were clearly headed upward. Lilith's spine turned to ice at the thought of where they were headed and what her grandfather did there.
The room jolted and came to a halt. The girl and her pet found themselves splattered against the floor. Scratching at the parquet to stand, Panther growled. "This mansion indeed appears to have a mind of its own."
"Perhaps it's trying to help us," Lilith panted, fixing her beret.
"Perhaps. Perhaps not. Would you be so kind as to remind me why we had to leave your room?"
"For an emergency ballet escapade. To think."
"Ah, how forgetful of me. I thought we were getting steak."
"After. We were going to get you steak after."
"I thought we were going to get me steak before. I must've heard you wrong. My fault. Well, if I may so humbly observe, this room appears to be rather identical to yours in size. Try watering it, maybe it will grow?"
"You're being incredibly helpful, as always." Lilith stood, trying the doorknob. "It's locked."
"Naturally. It requires payment, don't you think?" Panther sneered, his pride restored.
Lilith scowled at him.
"I'm sure if you asked it politely, it would tell you what, how much, and how bloody, which reminds me. I'm certainly in the mood for bloody steak, which someone promised me, if I may mention." Panther licked his muzzle.
Ignoring him, Lilith turned on her heel, marched to the bathroom, and returned with water cupped in her hands. She splashed it on the knob. Every drop got sucked in, but nothing happened.
"Obviously, it wants more."
"Obviously."
It took Lilith several trips until the knob shook in smug satisfaction, having absorbed every drop.
"I tell you, I've seen things," Panther growled philosophically, "squirrels chasing their tails like dogs, dogs climbing trees like squirrels, but I've never seen a house behave like a flower, demanding to be watered."
The door flew open with an upset thud. The next moment they were spit out into the corridor. The room behind them sealed itself and descended to its level, clearly upset. They didn't have time to contemplate, because a new curiosity stole their attention.
As much as the second floor was white, the third floor was red. It glowed like the pulsing guts of someone alive, stinking faintly. To make matters worse, the floor gleamed with a polished sheen that reminded Lilith of coagulated blood. She wanted to hang in the air, so that her feet didn't touch it. Panther whimpered, demanding to be held, his ability to talk forgotten.
"Excuse me, dear red color. You're one of my favorites, but this is, frankly, a little bit much," Lilith said.
Two voices and two sets of footsteps, one heavy and one trotting, rang through the corridor. Gustav fired off what sounded like complaints, and Alfred answered with a curt, "Ja, ja."
Panther whined. Lilith shushed him.
They had to run, but where? Lilith's heart pounded in her head, preventing her from thinking clearly, and Panther's thrashing in her arms only added to her panic. Instead of running toward the staircase, risking to be seen yet having a chance to pass their unsuspecting pursuers, she ran toward the end of the hallway. Panther squirmed. Lilith's ballet slippers slid, their soles worn smooth; and with a shriek she collapsed into a wall, sprawling and banging her head. Blood shot out of her nose. The voices and footsteps paused, then Alfred shouted something and they broke into a run.
"Just spectacular. Absolutely, spiffing spectacular," Lilith complained, thinking there was no point in keeping quiet. "And the reason you couldn't keep still is...?"
"I suddenly needed to relieve myself of a certain liquid," Panther growled.
Lilith stared. "What?"
"Pee! I need to pee!"
A new gush of blood prevented Lilith from answering. She wiped it as best she could and cleaned her hand on the wall to prevent from staining her ballet attire. Without a warning, the wall split open and sucked in both the girl and the dog, closing itself shut.
Darkness and silence surrounded them like velvet.
"Panther?" Lilith whispered.
"It's best we stay quiet, madam," Panther growled under his breath.
"Just making sure."
Lilith put her hands on the floor, propping herself up, and stifled a cry. Something lapped the blood off her fingers, and it wasn't the whippet.
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