🌹R O S E III🌹

🌹CHAPTER THIRTY - EIGHT🌹

My eyes open when everything grows silent and I see my father lying there on the floor, unconscious but I can see he still breathes by the rise and fall of his chest but I also notice that Cathryn is there on the floor too, not to comfort him. No, bleeding on the floor.

I gasp as I see her and run over to her and go down on my knees. Blood rushes out from her the place where her heart is and she is breathing heavily as she has a hard time breathing at all. Tears are streaming down my face as I try to hold over the wound to stop the bleeding but it's not working.

A lump forms in my throat as I look at her face, I can see the pain in her eyes that she tries to hide. She shushes me as I cry and lifts her hand up and wipes away my tears. "D-doin-g t-th... the r-rig-gh-t thin-g" Sh stutters through her pain and I shake my head.

"Don't speak, I'm going go get help" I tell her and as I was about to stand up she grabs a hold on my hand and prevents me from trying to get the phone to call the police and an ambulance. She doesn't speak anything after that but she looks into my eyes as she takes her final breath.

As a tear roll downs from my eye I hold her hand and sit there. The world becoming blurry, all the sounds and just about everything just fades away as I feel like my heart can't take this pain. She may have betrayed me and she may have shot me but she did the right in the end and she made things right.

She was my aunt but she was so much more than that, she wasn't just an assassin. She was a human being and she was someone that I cared for but now she's gone and the sadness weighs me down like never before. As I hold her hand and cry I barely notice how people stream into the room.

I barely notice how arms pick me up, put a blanket over me and take me out of the hotel room. I barely notice how I'm being take to the hospital and I barely notice anything that they say. All I can do is stare ahead as the sadness and sorrow has entered my body and I know it is never going to leave me.

My life has always been on the brink of sadness with all those betrayals and plots and now I just can't take any more of it. It's all just too much and each time I catch a break the pain and the sorrow becomes worse than the last time and this time I can never get better.

I barely notice when I'm being taken somewhere with people talking all around and their words are muffled and their faces blurred. I don't know if they're speaking to me and neither do I care, I don't care about anything until the darkness has swallowed me whole and I'm taken into the dreamless state inside my own mind.

.•🌹•..•🌹•..•🌹•.

By the time that I woke up again I'm in a hospital room and I notice that my mom and Alexander are in the room too. Remembering what had happened I just lie there and stare at the wall ahead of me. They speak about something but I don't process it nor do I care.

What they did to me was something that I don't think I can forgive and after what their actions led to... I don't think I will ever be able to forget this and what they did to me. All of it. Both of them walk over to but their voices are so lost in the background that I can't even hear them anymore.

I don't want to either. I'm just too far lost and alone to care anymore. I lost the one person who actually stood by me and I was there with her when she died and I feel like it's all my fault that I could've done something. I play that moment in my life over and over again.

Where I had picked up the vase and slammed it into his head which led to him pulling the trigger and letting the bullet flyer into her body where it... killed her. Ended her life. She did do the right thing in the end and she did save me and everyone that his madness wanted to destroy but the cost was just too high.

My eyes are only on the wall that is in front of the bed on the other side of the room and somehow I feel like I've done this sometime before but I don't remember where or what was happening, though none of that even matters to me right about now.

Nothing does anymore. It's like I've lost something of the world, a part of it perhaps. This hollowness inside me doesn't want to leave and I'm not sure I want it to leave because it is the thing that keeps me alive, it brings forth the pain and the pain shows me that I'm still breathing.

That I'm alive. However, the only reason that I'm alive is because she saved me and I now can never thank her for that, for what she did for me. She died saving me and she laid down her life for me and while that may have been her choice and her life, she did not deserve this.

No one deserves death like that and it breaks me apart to know that she did die and that she was the one that had to greet death while it was supposed to be me. If she had not showed up then he would've shot me. That I know very well and he would've killed me. The only life lost would've been my own.

"Rose" A voice that I know comes to my ears but I ignore him. When my heart only wants to pull me closer to him but I don't want that. After the pain that he has caused me, I don't think that I can handle this and I don't think that I will be able to do that, allow myself to forgive him.

"Rose" He speaks and for the first time in a long time I move my eyes from the wall that was the only thing that actually kept me entertained, though I was not even entertained by it at all, not even the wall. And I look at him. At Alexander Knight.

The man that I've fallen in love with but he continues to bring so much pain to my heart, however nothing is worse than this pain that I'm going through right now, that is worse than any other pain and I pray that I never have to go through that pain throughout my life.

He has tears in his eyes but he they do soften when I look into them. "I'm so sorry" He whispers to me and I notice that he's holding my hand and while his touch does calm me down I still feel this disgust at what he did to me. Perhaps it is because of the pain inside me but it is there, for better or worse it's there.

"I'm so sorry, Rose and I wish I could take it back but I can't. All I know is that I can't live without you. A life without you in it is no life at all. I know I don't deserve your forgiveness but I have to believe that your heart will choose right because I will do what I it takes to make you happy, even if that means staying away" He says to me.

I could hear his words but he had walked away and out of the room before my brain could even process the words and he had left before I could've uttered a single word, not that I was going to but still. I don't know if I understand him right or not. At the moment I barely understand anything but the sadness inside me.

I think that he's saying that I can choose to be with him or leave him and we go our separate ways. Through my broken heart I understand one thing. I need him now more than ever. I don't want him to go away. I don't want him to leave me alone.

I need him and my heart, body and soul needs him. Even after everything which I don't think I will be able to forget and I'm not sure about forgive but I know that I need him in my life. I'm quick to throw the covers off my body and stand up from the bed and walking to the door of the hospital room.

Running down the hallways where I see him I run over to him and then throw myself into his arms which leaves him stunned but I can tell he likes it. I don't speak, not even sure that I can find my voice after what happened to me but the hug and my tears are enough to tell him that I do love him and I do want him.

Despite all that he has done to me, however while I have not forgiven and forgotten it I know that while he can't live without me, I can't live without him either and I need him in my life. Now more than ever. Alexander lifts me up bridal style no matter who is watching us.

Taking me back to the room that I was in which my mother has left and gone somewhere else I suppose. He gently sets me down on the bed and smiles sadly down at me as he sits on the bed too. "I love you. Never forget that" He speaks to me as he holds my hand.

He holds my hand as if he never wants to let go of my hand ever again and I think I feel the same way. I need him to hold me in reality and I need his hand to support me in more ways than one. "I don't know how much you are going to listen to me but I need to explain, Rose. No matter if I have to do it again" He says to me.

"I broke your heart so many times but seeing you cry. Seeing a tear that comes from sadness instead of joy breaks me apart. I would cross this world to make you smile and I would go to the end of the world to know you are happy. I love you more than I can possibly say. That is why I did the things I did" He says.

"They sent a picture of you... sleeping. Showing me how easy it would be to hurt you and... k-kill you. I had to do something and even I, a man that is wealthy and with the best security in the world was unable to protect the one I love. I can't lose you, Rose. Not again. Never again" He tells me.

I never truly thought about how he felt when he broke up with me and how broken it made him feel. How all of this makes him feel and it makes me a terrible person. I just wish I could take it all back and go back to the time where we happy and alive and just living our lives the best way possible.

He sighs as he looks down and I welcome him for a hug once again. Feeling like we both need this hug to make ourselves feel better. "I forgive you" I whisper to him. The word came out of me before I could stop myself and now matter how much I tell myself that I can't forgive him, I have forgiven him.