Steve tells Natasha he loves her at the wrong time.  

Steve had known how he felt about Natasha since their very first kiss. She was outstanding in every way and when she had kissed him on the escalator (even if it was to get away from hydra), everything within him just made since. 

Sometimes he thought to himself that there was no way that he could love her more then he already did, and then she'd smirk at him or press a kiss to his cheek after a movie night and he'd swear that his love for her would triple. 

It was a never-ending cycle and he could hardly contain his feelings when he was around her.  

The day he built up the courage to finally ask her out had to be one of the best of his life. She had said yes with a grin and then teased him about going on his first date since 1945, to which he simply replied that he was waiting for the right girl. 

That was the first time he had ever seen her look flustered. 

Since then, he had taken her on several dates and their relationship was approaching three months. Every morning that he woke up with her in his arms, he almost let the three words floating around his head spill out of his lips but he knew she wasn't ready to hear them. 

Natasha was someone who needed time...not to develop feelings, but to accept them. And Steve was more then willing to give her all the time she needed. 

Or at least, that's what he had planned on doing. 

"What's our movie tonight?" He asked Natasha as she placed herself in his lap sideways. 

Natasha shrugged, "What's left on your list?" 

Steve frowned, trying to remember, "The Breakfast Group? Is that one?" 

Natasha rolled her eyes, laughing a bit, "The Breakfast Club. That's a good one." 

Steve blushed slightly at his mistake and quickly looked up the movie. He put it on and tried to pay more attention to the movie then to the stunning red-head in his arms, failing miserably. 

"You know, the reason you don't like most of these modern movies is probably because you spend more time watching me then you do the movie," Natasha said a little while later, her eyes barely leaving the screen. 

Steve grinned, "I can't help it. When given the chance to watch you for two hours or a movie, I have to chose you." 

Natasha raised an eyebrow, "Well now you sound like a stalker." 

Steve rolled his eyes, "You know what I mean. I just mean, you're beautiful, and I love you."

Natasha's eyes widened in fear, "What?"

Realizing his mistake, Steve tried to recover, "I mean I love being with you."

Natasha shook her head, standing up and backing away from him, "That's not what you said Steve."

Steve stood up, trying to get her to calm down, "Nat-"

"Tell me you didn't mean that. Please Steve," Natasha pleaded, her eyes still wide.

Steve opened his mouth but no words came out. He shook his head, "Nat, I- I can't do that." 

She let out an exasperated sigh, "Yes you can. Just fucking say it Steve!" 

"I won't lie to you Natasha."

Natasha cursed, "Damn it Steve! I can't do that and you know it!" 

The words cut deeper then they should have for Steve but he knew that she was just scared. 

"Natasha please just listen to me-" He started, coming towards her and placing a hand on her cheek tentatively, "-I don't expect you to say it back. I don't need you too. I didn't mean to tell you like this or anytime soon, but I'm not going to take it back. I do love you."

She closed her eyes, refusing to meet Steve's pleading ones, "You can't love me. We should have never started this thing between us Steve. I'm no good for you. All I'll do is hurt you in the end."

His heart shattered at her words, did she really regret their relationship? "You don't mean that Natasha."

"You don't understand Steve. I can't  love. The red room ingrained it into our minds when we were kids, 'Love is for children'. And every time I've gone against that I've gotten hurt or someone else has. I can't risk losing you too," Natasha said, her eyes filling with tears. 

Steve shook his head, "You don't get to decide who you do and don't love Natasha. And if you try and push love away, all it's going to do is hurt you. I know. With Peggy, I let my insecurities get between us and I pushed her away until right before going into the ice. It hurt me so bad that until I got to know you, I didn't think I'd ever move on from her." 

Natasha refused to look at him now.

"Natasha, I love you more then I ever loved Peggy. Please just let me love you." 

She shook her head, squeezing her eyes shut and fighting back tears, "I can't." 

Steve's heart fell in his chest as she pulled away from his touch, grabbing her leather jacket from where it was draped over the couch.

"I have to go," She whispered. 

Steve reached for her wrist but she was already out of his reach.

Natasha looked back at him and he could tell that she was as upset as he was about leaving, "Please don't come after me. I'm going to be gone for a while. Try to move on from me. You deserve so much better." 

Steve shook his head, he'd never move on from her, "I won't. I'll wait for you." 

Natasha sighed and looked as though she was about to reach up to kiss him goodbye, but clearly though better of it, "Take care Steve."

With that, she was gone. 

It was all Steve could do to not chase her down and beg her to stay, to lie and say that he hadn't meant it, to pretend he wasn't totally smitten with her. 

But he knew it would be wrong. 

So many things had been taken from Natasha in her life...he wasn't about to take away his own love from her when she had clearly never been loved the way she should have been before. Even if she didn't realize it, she deserved his love. 

Hell, she deserved his love and more. 

Steve just wished that she'd come back to him and let him love her the way he desperately wanted to. 

That night, he didn't sleep at all. 

In just a few months, he had become reliant on having Natasha laying next to him, her warmth providing a safe-haven from the nightmares that terrorized him. Now he couldn't help but wonder if Natasha was struggling as much as he was. 

He wondered if she'd come back. He also wondered if maybe he had been wrong the whole time. 

Steve had known she wasn't ready to hear that he loved her, but he had thought that a part of her felt the same. He certainly hadn't thought that she would be so upset by him loving her that she would leave him. 

Three weeks went by and all Steve could think about was her. 

Everyone told him to move on, telling him that she was probably in a different country with no plans on returning unless it was for a mission. 

He still refused though. 

He had told her he would be waiting on her and he fully intended on keeping that promise, even if she never came back. 

"You really haven't heard from her?" He asked Clint one night after training, surprised to find out that Natasha hadn't contacted him since she left. 

Clint shook his head, "She probably knew what I'd tell her and didn't want to hear it." 

Steve frowned, "What would you say?"

"I'd tell her that she should stay. Natasha's been hurt a lot of ways by a lot of different people, but I don't think for a second that you'd ever do something to hurt her," Clint explained. 

Steve frowned, "I already did hurt her though. she wasn't ready to hear that I loved her and I just blurted it out. She looked so upset by it."

"She's just scared Cap. Trust me, she'll come back. I know Natasha. One day she'll realize her own feelings and she'll be back. Just give her time."

Steve nodded, "Thanks Clint." 

Clint just nodded before walking off to his floor. 

Steve sighed and walked up to his own room. 

He opened the door and let it close behind him as he kicked off his shoes and leaned back against the wood, closing his eyes with a loud sigh. He really missed coming back to Natasha. 

"Hey," A quiet voice said from in front of him, making his attention snap up onto the woman leaning against his couch. 

"Natasha?" Steve asked, wondering if maybe he missed her so much that he was hallucinating her. 

She nodded slowly, looking overwhelmed with guilt, "Yeah, it's me."

Steve walked towards her carefully, worried that if he moved too quickly or suddenly, she might disappear, "What are you doing here?"

"I needed to see you," Natasha started, looking more unsure of herself than Steve had ever seen, "I've had a lot of time to do some thinking and it turns out you were right."

Steve looked up at her, hope filling his blue orbs.

"I don't know if you moved on yet or not, but I think I love you too," She whispered, searching Steve's eyes for any sign that he was mad at her. 

He couldn't help the smile that spread onto his lips, "I never even considered moving on Natasha, and if your serious about this then I'm thrilled, and I want to do everything I can to prove that love isn't so bad, but if you're just doing this to spare my feelings please don't. All I want is for you to be happy. Whether that's with or without me."

Natasha shook her head, feeling more sure about her confession, "I mean it Steve. The feelings that I have for you are stronger then anything I've ever experienced, and if that's not love, then I don't know what ever will be." 

Steve smiled again, pulling her to him gently and bending down to kiss her slowly, trying to pour his love for her into a single, breathtaking kiss. 

"I love you," He whispered. 

Natasha sighed, her lips turning up into a hint of a smile, "I love you too." 

Steve grinned and Natasha couldn't help but let out a quiet laugh. Now that she had said it, she didn't think anything could be more true, "I love you Steve. I really do." 

Steve bent down to kiss her again and Natasha wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him impossibly close. 

If this is what love really was, then Natasha would be sure never to run from it again. 

Hey guys. I've missed writing angsty chapters so this was a lot of fun to write. I hope you all enjoyed this chapter and if you did, please comment and vote. Like always, I hope you are all staying safe and healthy!