Julie nodded numbly. "It should have been me," Julie whispered. "I shouldn't have walked out like that. It's all my fault."

"Don't say that, J," Leesha said as firm but comforting as possible. "It shouldn't have happened to anyone. If anyone is to blame, it's me. You were right. If things had gone differently, none of this would have happened."

"I told him...I told him just now, he has to come back to us... to see his child. Leesh, I'm not angry or blaming either of you. I...I just want my Rockstar back." Julie rested her elbows on her knees and buried her face into her hands.

"You know he's a fighter, J. He's resilient and stubborn...he loves you and the kids more than anything." Leesha rubbed Julie's back and fell silent. Her phone rang in her lap and she picked it up. "Hey...they just took him up to surgery...yeah I'm here with her...ok good...um, yeah her bubble bath is on the top shelf in the bathroom...ok I love you too..." She hung up and shove the phone into her purse.

Julie listened to the one-sided conversation absently as she picked at the side of her thumb, a bad habit she'd picked up from Jon, and stared off into space praying to every god and goddess she could. She looked up as the door burst open, Steph and Jesse rushed to her.

"Mom? Where's dad?" Stephanie tearily asked her step-mother.

"Steph! Jesse!" Julie stood and took the kids into a tight hug, "Honey, they've taken him up to surgery. I'm sorry...they couldn't wait any longer."

"Surgery? What the hell for?" Jesse asked as he pulled back a little.

"Ahh...he has internal bleeding, fractures, and lacerations. They're worried about the head injuries though," Julie sighed. "He was in the 'Vette so things are a little worse than if he was in the SUV."

"What was he doing in that car?" Jesse questioned.

Julie looked at Leesha for support. "Let's all sit and we can talk," Leesha piped in. The kids nodded and sat with the women. "Your Dad grabbed a set of keys and rushed out. All he wanted to do was get to Julie."

"We...oh fuck...we had a fight," Julie started, "I drove off in my car. Your dad... your dad came after me."

"Another fight?" Stephie said, "What was it about this time?"

Leesha bit her lip and looked down into her lap, weaving her fingers in and out. "Me..." She rested her hands on her stomach and sniffed quietly. "I'm...uh...fuck..."

"It doesn't matter what we fought about," Julie interrupted Leesha, not wanting to distress the kids even further, "What's important right now is your dad. He needs all his family around him." She squeezed Leesha's hand when she saw the surprised look on her face.

"I called mom to tell her," Jesse said, "She's bringing Jake and Romy. She wants to know if she can see dad too?"

"Let's see how the surgery goes first, huh?" Julie offered as a compromise. She and Dot hadn't really been on speaking terms much over the past almost-two decades, but she understood why she'd want to see him.

The four of them sat in the waiting area talking and binging on cheap hospital coffee for nearly three hours before the door opened to reveal the doctor. "Mrs. Bongiovi? Sorry, are these two Jon's children?" Dr. Courser asked.

"Yes, we are," Stephanie confirmed, "There's more of us though. How is my dad?"

"Well... we did lose him twice but we were able to relieve the pressure on his brain. The bleeding is under control but we will be keeping him in ICU for the next week," the doctor said kindly. "He's stable at the moment but we have him in an induced coma for now."

Julie collapsed against Leesha when the doctor had said they'd lost him. Stephanie and Jesse clung to each other at the doctor's words. "What's the prognosis, doctor?" Leesha asked knowing the others weren't capable of it.

"The fractures and internal bleeding should heal over time. However, due to the head injury, we can only take it day by day I'm afraid," Dr. Courser explained, "I'm sorry it's not better news at this stage. They're just getting him settled, then you should be able to see him briefly two at a time. Rest is the most important thing at this stage of his recovery. I'll get the nurse to show you the way soon. Mrs. Bryan, may I speak with you privately?"

Leesha looked over to Julie then back to the doctor. "Of course."

She followed Dr. Courser just outside the glass door, painfully aware of Steph and Jesse watching. "I got your blood results back as well as David's."

"And?"

"All the tests came back as negative." Leesha let out a sigh of relief, taking the envelope containing the results and a bottle of sugary juice for the next test. "Call the office Monday morning and we can schedule for a follow up exam and ultrasound."

"I appreciate it, doc," Leesha said and shook his hand. She re-entered the room and sat next to Julie.

Steph looked over and leaned in to say quietly, "So how far along are you?" Leesha looked up in surprise as she tried stuffing the bottle and envelope in her purse. "Don't look at me with the deer in the headlight eyes. I had to take the glucose test with the twins..."

As Leesha and Stephie talked, Julie saw Jesse sitting by himself looking pensively out the window. She stood and walked over to him and picked up his hand in hers and rested her head on his shoulder. "He's gonna be okay, Jess, you gotta keep believing that. You're dad's a fighter, kiddo, and he loves you all so much."

"We know he does, but it doesn't make it any less scary. Fuck, mom, I thought I was gonna hurl when the doctor said they'd lost him," Jesse confessed.

"Oh honey, me too," Julie said. She was about to say something further when there was a flurry of message notifications coming from everyone's phones. They all looked at each other as they reached for their devices.

"Oh fuck," Leesha groaned.

Julie whimpered a little when she saw the news feeds from around the world as the news of Jon's accident broke. Large photos of the accident site were plastered over the websites. There was even a photo of Julie and the Officer Jennings.

"Jesse, ring your mom and tell her not to let the boys read the news feeds. Tell her she can come to see him but if she puts one foot out of line, I'll ban her from the hospital completely," Julie said after seeing how pale he and his sister had gone, "Stephie, honey, are you okay?" Julie kissed Jesse's cheek as he dialed his mother's number then stood and took her step-daughter into her arms to comfort her when she broke down.

Leesha dialed a number in her phone and said, "Mike, Leesha. I need you at the medical center with your best guy. Now. And I'll pay triple your rate. Sixth floor." She hung up and dialed David. "I don't have time for that. Listen. Do not let the kids onto the news sites. No, the story about Jon is plastered everywhere. Mike is on his way for security. It's only a matter of time before they swarm the hospital. Whatever you do, stay away from Jon and Julie's house. I'll have Mike send security to our place as well."

Julie's phone buzzed in her pocket between her and Steph. She pulled it out and read the display. "Turn your phones off," she said to the kids, "I don't want to read anymore and I don't think you should either. But after I call Richie...he needs to know before the news gets to him first."

She hit the call button and waited for him to answer, "Hey Rich..."

"Hey beautiful...you calling about Jon in the news?" Richie asked, his voice thick.

"Yeah, honey, are you okay? Is Becca with you?" Julie asked before she told him Jon's condition, watching as Leesha rushed from the room while texting on her phone.

"She is. We're flying out to Jersey tonight."

"That's probably a good thing..." she could hardly bring herself to continue, "The doctor just came down after his surgery. Rich...it's...it's not good." She swallowed heavily and turned away from the kids, "They lost him twice on the table..." She barely held it together when she heard Richie's cry over the phone before it dropped to the floor.

Becca came on the line next, "Jules, are you and the kids okay? We'll be there as soon as possible. Stay strong okay?"

"Is he okay, Bec?" Julie choked out.

"He will be," came the kindly reply, "We'll see you soon."

Julie slowly closed her phone and swiped the tears from her face before turning to face the others. "Mookie and Bec are on their way."

Leesha came back in with Mike and a second security guard. "Jon's name is changed in the hospital system," she said and wrapped her arm around Julie. "Mike and Trevor will be guarding Jon until his release."

"Thank you, honey. I don't know what I'd do without you," Julie hugged her tight as the two men left again, "I'm so sorry about everything...everything I've said and done to you both."

Leesha cradled Julie's head and gave her a small smile. "Water under the bridge, girl, water under the bridge." They kissed each other on the cheek.

"Has David told the younger kids?" Julie asked.

"Yeah...Colton's there with him along with Sammy and the twins, Ari and Ethan."

"Call him, he needs to be here," Julie looked at her friend, "For your sake as much as Jon's."

The nurse knocked on the door and advised that Jon had been moved and settled. "You can go in but only two at a time and only for a short time."

Julie pushed Steph and Jesse forward, "You two go first. You need to see him first I'll be here for you when you come out." Julie kissed their cheeks and they followed the nurse out the door.

She jumped a little when she felt her phone buzz again, figuring she must have only set it to mute rather than turned it off completely. Looking at the display she saw a message from Richie telling her they'd boarded their flight and they'd buzz again when they'd landed.

The minutes ticked by painfully slow. Leesha had disappeared to get food for them. Julie figured she had gotten lost or wandered into the gift shop. She decided to look at her notifications and saw an outpouring of sympathy, love, and compassion from Bon Jovi fans posted on their social media. Even after being out of the business for years, the fans were just as dedicated.

"Jules?" David poked his head in, the cuts on his face cleaned of blood but still an angry red. His hair was pulled up and the poor guy was still in his sweats and t-shirt. "Sorry I didn't have time to change."

She looked up from her phone at his voice and launched herself at him bursting into tears, "David I'm so sorry. I...I didn't mean...I'm sorry. Jon...he's...he's..." She couldn't get any coherent words out through her tears.

"I know...shhh..." David cooed, hugging her tight and stroking her hair. "Fuck I'm sorry, Jules." His tears ran freely, falling into Julie's hair. He held her shaking body, her hard sobs breaking his heart. "I didn't mean to hurt you, darlin', I really didn't."

"I know...I forgive you," Julie sniffed as she finally started to calm down.

Leesha finally reappeared her arms laden with packages, which she promptly dropped on the closest chair and joined in on the hug making the others chuckle, breaking the somber mood just in time before Stephie and Jesse came back in looking shell-shocked.

"C'mere you two," Julie said as she pulled them both to her, letting them cry on her shoulder just as she had done with David. "David, you and Leesha go next."

"Okay. Will you three be okay?" he asked. When Julie nodded, he took his wife's hand and opened the door almost running into Dot with Romeo and Jake behind her.

"Dorothea!" David exclaimed, "It's been a while...."

Julie was left standing as Stephanie and Jesse heard their mother's voice and turned to her.

"David..." she replied coolly, "Leesha. How are you both?"

"Could be better," Leesha replied equally as cool, "If you'll excuse us, we're on our way to see Jon." They said their hello's to Jake and Romeo on their way past as Dot swept into the room.

"Hello Dorothea," Julie greeted her husband's ex-wife before turning to the two younger Bongiovi boys, "Hey you two, c'mere and give me a hug. I could do with one tonight."

"You look like shit mama J," Jake comment softly. Julie had to smile at the comment because that's how she felt too. She could feel Dot's eyes on her as she hugged Romeo tightly.

"Thank you for letting me come here. How is he?" Dot asked, taking a seat, "We've seen some early reports but you never know how accurate they are. There's a posse of media outside too, by the way."

The whole Bongiovi family sat as she recited Jon's injuries and the details of the surgery. Stephanie and Jesse filling in the details of their visit with their father. "Why on earth would Jon drive like that in the Corvette?" Dot tried to figure out.

"We...ah, we were fighting, and I took off in my car," Julie confessed, "He was chasing after me."

"Huh. So you're to blame," Dot accused.

Julie's eyes snapped up to meet Dot's and saw nothing but contempt. "Be very, very careful what you say Dorothea. I'm in no mood to play your games today. I let you come today out of compassion and for the sake of your children. I could have quite easily denied you access," Julie said through gritted teeth.

"Oh please," Dot rolled her eyes. Her children started shift uncomfortably.

"Mom, come on," Stephanie chided her mother.

The door open when David lead an ashen faced Leesha into the room and sat her down, flopping down beside her. He scrubbed his face and said, "Jon's allowed one more visit, Jules. I'd go now if I were you, then we'll go home for the night and get some rest."

"No," Julie said tiredly, "Dorothea, you and the boys should go next. I'm staying here with Jon tonight, David. Take Leesha home." She saw her friend trying desperately to hold it together in front of the others. "Leesha, honey? Go home with your husband and give Sammy and Ari my love. Please? Steph, take your brother and go too. Give the girls' an extra big hug from Papa."

All eyes were upon her, judging her, when all she wanted to do was be alone with her thoughts and memories of Jon. Leesha caught her eye and she sighed and returned the unspoken question with a nod.

"Dot, please take the boys to see their father," Leesha took the reigns again, "Steph, we'll see you and Jesse at our place. David and I will stop and pick up pizzas on the way home, won't we babe?"

"Yeah, I'll even get a ham and pineapple for Sammy," David visibly shuddered at the words. "The guest rooms are all set up if Jake and Romy wanna stay over with everyone."

"C'mon mom. We'll come back to say goodbye before we go, mama J," Romeo kissed Julie's cheek before he took his mother's hand and followed Jake out the door and down to the ICU. Jesse and Stephanie followed and said goodbye to their mother in private.

Julie released a breath she didn't realize she was holding. Her eyes couldn't seem to concentrate on any one particular thing so she closed them. Leesha sighed and stood, pulling David with her. "Hey...you gonna be okay?" she asked Julie.

"Hmm? Yeah...yeah I'll be okay," Julie said wearily, "I...I can't go home without him. Please help the girls understand."

"We will," David replied.

"How was he?" Julie asked quietly.

"Do you really want to know?" he asked, concerned for her state of mind. When Julie nodded, Leesha slipped her arm around Julie shoulders for support. "He looks like shit. But he's a survivor. You gotta keep remembering that."

"Can you talk to the rest of the family...Matt, Tony, Dad," Julie asked, "Tell them...tell them I'll talk to them tomorrow."

"We will," Leesha promised, "Try and rest, huh? Call us for anything...our house is only ten minutes away." Julie nodded and pushed them gently to the door after another round of hugs.

She was finally alone. She walked around the room several times, stopping to sit but almost immediately jumping back up again. After about ten minutes of pacing and sitting, sitting and pacing, Jake popped his head back in the room.

"Mom?" he said softly. Julie could tell he'd been crying by his red eyes and stained cheeks.

"Hey honey, c'mon in," Julie smiled at her step-son, "How's Romy and your mom? I can see how you are."

The young man, who looked so much like his father, cleared his throat before speaking, "They'll be along soon. Will...will dad be okay?"

Julie took his hand and tried to give him her most confident look and she smiled, "We have to believe that, Jake. We have to stay strong for your dad. He won't always look so beat up either. Remember that, okay?"

Romeo opened the door and help his mother to a chair. Dot looked shattered, sitting in silence as Julie gave Romeo a comforting hug then sat down beside the boys' mother. She picked up Dot's hand and held it, gently chafing the back of it sympathetically. "He'll be okay, Dot. We have to believe that," Julie said quietly.

The older brunette nodded and looked at Julie, saying quietly, "I think the kids should stay together tonight. Just...just in case."

"Bring them over to the Bryan's house," Julie responded. "I think being around the others will help. Just have them call Steph or Jesse as a heads up. Our house is surrounded with press, apparently."

Dot nodded and said, "Jake, can you drop me off at home then I think you and Romy should go be with your brother and sisters tonight at David's place. Call Stephanie and let her know the plans." The two boys agreed and Jake stepped outside to make the call.

Dot then turned back to Julie and regarded her in silence. Julie could almost see her thought processes through the subtle changes in her face. "I know we haven't always seen eye to eye over the years, but I just want to say that I do appreciate you letting me come here tonight. I don't envy you the next few days. Please keep me updated. I...I still love him in a weird kind of way."

Julie lowered her eyes and nodded, "I know you do. He's not easy to forget, is he? I promise I'll let you know of any change. Richie and Becca are flying in now so they should be here in a few hours and Ari and Sammy need to see their dad too. That's gonna be hard."

"Then I'll leave you to try and rest too." Dot and Julie rose at the same time and the older woman embraced Julie briefly. The three made their goodbyes and Julie was finally alone.

She'd had enough of the floor walls of this room, only leaving to go to the bathroom and to speak with the nurses occasionally. With her purse on her shoulder, she walked to the water fountain and took a sip of the cool liquid and found herself making her way to Jon's room. She smiled at Mike and Trevor as they sat vigil beside his door, and stared at her husband through the glass wall, gasping softly upon seeing his head partially shaved and bandaged heavily. She watched the nurse check the equipment and take notes.

"How you holding up, Mrs. B?" Mike asked in his deep gruff voice.

"Wishing this was a nightmare that I can wake up from, Mike, but I'll get there," Julie replied.

"Anything I can do for you?"

"Do you believe in God?" Julie asked.

Mike nodded and replied, "Yes, Ma'am. Born and raised Southern Baptist."

Julie swallowed and her eyes darted to Jon's monitors. "Then send every prayer you have for my husband to come back to me, because I can't forgive him for doing this to Jon at the moment."

The nurse happened to glance up at that moment and smiled at Julie, motioning for her to come in. Julie patted Mike on the shoulder as she walked past him and into the sterile room.

"I know you haven't been in yet to visit him, so I'll leave you two alone. He's still hanging in there, so he's a fighter. I'll be back every half hour to check on him and bring you a pillow with a warm blanket. The corner chair reclines if you want to stay in here. Try to get some rest yourself, we don't need both of you in here." With a kindly smile, she turned and left.

Julie couldn't take her eyes off Jon but managed a small "Thank you" before the nurse left. She picked up Jon's hand that was closest to her and kissed his fingers. The monitors never indicated that he felt her or knew that she was there.

"Oh Rockstar...what have you done to yourself, baby?" Julie whispered, "I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have run off like that. Then you wouldn't have been in that bloody car chasing after me. Of all your cars, why that one?" She only received the beeping monitors in response.

"You gotta come back to us, honey. Please. Your kids need you. I need you! I need you so much, baby." She lowered her head to his chest just to hear his heart as she cried. She sat there awkwardly perched on the side of the bed for as long as she could before sitting up and brushing at the tears she'd left behind.

Briefly his blood pressure dropped, setting off the alarm, but rose and the room was quiet once more. This would be the soundtrack to Julie's night. The chance of Jon's vitals dropping, alarm sounding, then rising.

The nurse returned 30 minutes later not only carrying a pillow and blanket for Julie, but a bottle of water and a bag of chips. "Is there anything we can get you to eat?" She asked kindly. "The staff cafe is still open if you're hungry."

"Thank you, but I'll be fine. Am I allowed to have my phone on in here? I'm expecting friends flying in."

"That's fine, Mrs Bongiovi."

Julie spent the next hours keeping vigil over Jon, drift in and out of consciousness as exhaustion finally started taking hold. Her eyes had finally closed after more tears and head lollying to one side when a male voice came from the door. "Jules?"

Julie thought she was dreaming but forced her eyes to open a little anyway. "Richie?" she murmured as she became fully awake. Fresh tears came and she launched herself up out of the chair and into his arms.

"Hey...hey now...," Richie held her tight as they both cried. Becca stood by their sides, waiting, knowing that they needed this comfort for each other. They eventually separated and Julie motioned for Richie to go see Jon before she hugged Becca. "Go talk to him Richie, he needs to hear your voice too. Maybe you can kick his stubborn ass back to us."

Julie stood arm in arm with Becca as they watched Richie approach Jon's bed and talk quietly to him while holding his hand.

"How is he, Jules?" Becca asked.

"Fighting one minute at a time, Bec," Julie said. "I feel so guilty. It's all my fault," she continued softly.

"Stop that crap right now," Becca scolded gently, "Jon doesn't need that. He needs you by his side in a positive frame of mind."

"I know but it's so hard...," Julie said, "How's Richie?"

"He'll be fine now that he's seen Jon," Becca replied, "It was a long flight, not knowing what we'd find when we got here. I think I'll have to replace my glassware when we get home."

"Oh...," Julie commented, understanding exactly what Becca was saying. She took Becca's hand and led her over to the bed. Becca stood with her husband while Julie went to the other side.

The trio kept a silent watch until Becca urged Richie away from Jon and for them both to get some rest. "The kids...are the kids ok?" Richie choked out.

"The older four have been here to see their dad. They're all staying with David and Leesha. Arielle and Sammy can come tomorrow, or today actually, if Jon doesn't take another turn for the worse," Julie said, then with a good look at Richie's face she continued, "Go...go get some sleep, honey. He needs you. We all need you."