-chapter one-hundred-nineteen-

FINN

There's just some line someone shouldn't cross.

And Sapphire has done too much playing.

With my eyes fixed on Renée, I pushed Gavin towards Sapphire. A stuttered breath left him as his gaze flickered from me and our friends. Gusto niyang lumapit pero hindi siya sigurado at naiintindihan ko ang kasalukuyang nararamdaman niya ngayon. It's what I also feel.

"Eura. Take Gavin down." utos ko.

Tumango siya at mahigpit na hinawakan ang kamay ni Gavin. "Eh, paano ka? Magpapaiwan ka ba dito?"

"Finn, kung magpapaiwan ka. Ako rin." kontra ng matalik kong kaibigan.

I smiled. "No. Let me. Just follow Eura. Their presence here does not change a thing, they are only clones."

Halatang tutol si Gavin sa desisyon ko, but I gave Eura a warning look. With a soft curse, she pulled the hesitant Gavin down, threatening him with her famous profanities on the way. I took a deep breath before facing the two friends I treasure so much.

I have never seen Renée's face after I lost control. I wasn't in the right mind, mentally and emotionally after Depore's and Caspian's death, and I was so, so hungry for a way to unleash my anger. But I knew that I had to protect her in that island and I have to control the desire to lunge at the two so-called queens who wants to steal from someone like me. Someone like me who doesn't owe anything and is just as broken as them.

Siguro... Siguro hindi nangyari ang lahat ng 'to kung nakita nila na hindi lang sila ang nasasaktan. That whatever pain they have won't be erased by revenge or hurting someone else, but it will only be healed. Maybe if they saw that that Sparrow they wanted to shoot and kill was just another small, wounded bird. And maybe we wouldn't have lost these people.

Nakabukas ang dalawang pamaypay niya at kahit gusto kong humakbang papalapit ay pinipigilan ko. One move and she will attack me. Because right now, in front of her, I am an enemy. And that beautiful blonde girl is not the friend that spent countless nights with me. She's just a clone of the first female friend I had.

"Do you want to know how she died?"

Lumapit si Sapphire kay Renée at pinatong ang ulo niya sa balikat nito. I stared at the movement, my breath hitching. Paanong... hindi siya inaatake?

"You were too lost in your fight that you didn't mind the time. So to let you survive, she jumped. She saved you and Sebastian maybe saw that. Kaya hindi ka niya matingnan sa mata kasi siguro parte sa kaniya ang sinisisi ka." mahina siyang natawa. "But, do not falter. I was the one who whispered the lies to him. He just blindly followed it."

I had a feeling. But for some reason, this confirmation made me relieved. Dahil sigurado na ako na hindi talaga ako ang pumatay kay Renée at... at nalungkot din na kailangan niyang gawin 'yon dahil hindi ako naging malakas para talunin ang dalawa.

Sebastian would be broken, of course. And I knew if Gavin saw Renée losing control and causing my death in the process, he would be angry and unstable too. Hindi naman namin kasalanang apat ang nangyari. They were just a reaction to the events that happened. The true villain was the person who made those events, in order to gauge out such reactions.

"Sapphire." I called, to which she hummed as an answer. "Who are you, really?"

Napangisi siya nang makita ang tinitingnan ko. Umayos siya ng tayo at inikot ang walang-buhay na clones ni Baste at Ree. They spinned around, their weapons slowly unfurling as they passed me by and I summoned my two, different weapons out.

"What do you think, Finn?"

Sa isang iglap ay tatlong bagay ang papunta sa'kin; Sebastian's dagger, Renée's air slicer produced by her fan, and Sapphire's chakram. Nagmula sila sa iba't ibang direksiyon para maging imposible ang pag-iwas ko. But I only ducked down to avoid all those high strikes.

Isang malakas na alon ng hangin ang pinapunta ni Renée sa banda ko. I was thrown back to Sapphire who immediately had her chakram out, aiming it at my neck. Summoning the little shadows I have left, I let it dance with the blade, moving my body sideways to avoid Sebastian's incoming dagger.

I wanted to imagine them as potatoes. So badly. Lahat ng gulay ay sinubukan ko nang isipin at magiging cabbage na sana ang ulo nila kung hindi lang hinatak ni Sapphire ang kamay ko.

"I'll tell you the whole truth if you come with me."

Sinamaan ko siya ng tingin. "Don't believe any of your words."

Sapphire made a small pout. "Shame. I had some good stories for you too."

Bigla niya akong itinulak. It wasn't powerful, kaya alam ko na kaya kong makaalis agad. If not for the black chasms that surrounded me and June's face that haunted inches away from mine. That brief second where my mind buffered, I completely lost the battle.

May namuong tubig sa may paanan ko at bigla ako nitong nilunod. I remembered screaming and struggling inside the floating water until my eyes fluttered close.

When I awoke next, a very large man stood in front of me.

Hindi ko alam kung nasaan ako. The ceiling was unbelievably high, almost ten storeys long. At kasingtangkad no'n ang lalaking nakawarrior suit na kasalukuyang kaharap ko. Nakalagay sa likod niya ang higanteng espada. His eyes reminded me of the crimson sky that promised death. And his very presence made me realized that I'm currently facing the final boss.

I blinked once. Twice. Before looking behind me.

Ako lang mag-isa sa napakalaking silid na 'to. A large gate with golden handles appeared behind the man, huge and menacing. Four pillars decorated in red and gold stood between us. The whole room is almost the size of every city I passed, but with the boss' in front of me, parang ang liit-liit ng silid at hindi ako makahinga.

Paano ako napunta dito? Kanina, kaharap ko lang naman sina Baste at Renée pero ngayon nandito na ako? Am I in the last city, about to fight the final boss?

Alone?

Isang paggalaw ang kumuha sa atensiyon ko kaya napasulyap ako sa gilid. Sapphire leaned against one of the pillars, a small smile in her lips. I wanted to charged towards her, but I fear that the man might suddenly move. Nakakatakot dahil parang langgam lang ako sa paa niya.

"Ano 'to, Sapphire? Where am I?" I whispered harshly.

She gestured at the place, amusement still present in her face. "Ano pa nga ba, Finn? You're in the last city. Congratulations!"

Kumunot ang noo ko. "But... I didn't... pass the gate?"

"You're here because I brought you here. Come on, Finn. You're smart. Hindi mo pa ba talaga nare-realize kung ano ako?"

"Game master." siguradong sagot ko. "Like Theo."

"Check ka diyan! I am a game master like Theo but we have different... orders? Master?" umakto siyang nag-iisip. "Paano ba? He's a normal game master like the other three, but I'm different. I was tasked to do something else."

"I..." umiling ako. "Don't understand."

Naglakad siya papunta sa'kin at sinulyapan ko ang kalaban sakaling bigla itong umatake. Sapphire noticed what I was uncomfortable about and she waved her hand dismissively.

"It won't attack since I stopped it for now. Pero sampung minuto lang ang itatagal ng pagfreeze niya kaya bilisan mo ang pagtanong. We don't want you getting killed in the middle of a conversation."

I took a deep breath to calm myself down. She's a game master and this is her territory. I'm alone with the game's last boss at the side. If I ever act harshly, baka kung ano ang mangyari sa'kin. Kaya bawat galaw at salita ko ay dapat may pag-iingat.

"Why are you doing this?"

"Hm. Good question." bahagya siyang sumimangot. "See, I owe someone a really big thing. And he asked for my help after knowing I'm part of the five game masters who will beta-test this game. Simple lang naman ang gagawin ko. Make sure the Marcella Maia wins and make a show of it. Drag the Sparrow, her biggest rival and threat, to the ground with the help of the person who hates her the most. And June did not even think twice about helping me to ruin your life. She did most things, I just... I just helped make them interesting."

From her words and her tone, it feels like I'm a toy they were manipulating around their stupid, child game.

"Marcella... is the reason-?"

"Hindi niya naman alam 'yon." putol niya sa'kin. "Marcella did not know any of this until recently. Sinabi ko sa kaniya kanina lang. So yes, she helped in ruining your life because you were her biggest threat but she changed. She even warned me to stop all this because like she said, wala siyang pakialam kung manalo siya o matalo."

"Then why?"

Bakit mo pa 'to pinapatuloy?

Nagkibit-balikat si Sapphire. "I'm telling you, I am very conflicted right now." she pouted. "I haven't talked to him again so I don't know what to do, but his lady is already trying to make me stop! Kaya naman dinala na lang kita dito."

I blinked at her. E kung hinayaan niya na lang ako at nagchill sa gilid, sana wala kaming hinaharap na problema ngayon?

"Who is he? Is...Is he the creator-"

At the mention of creator, Sapphire laughed loudly. Medyo nainis ako do'n kasi nakaka-insulto, e hindi ko naman alam kung anong nangyayari.

"Oh, oh no! Of course not!" blanko ko lang siyang tiningan habang natatawa pa rin. "But he does have the biggest contribution in this project, pero no. Pfft. You know, Finn," her serious eyes held mine. "He wasn't the one who created this masterpiece, but he did ruin it."

Lumapit siya sa'kin at itinuro ang puso ko. "This organ is supposed to be controlled by this," she pointed at her brain. "Not the other way around. But maybe humans, no matter how rational they could, are always a slave to emotions. And so, sometimes, we make the most horrible mistakes. We're too blinded by the truth we know and believed, that we couldn't see its consequences in the future? Action after action with no regard for the reactions. And we regret. And we try to change. Or we try to run away."

"Sa casino... si Theo..."

Malungkot siyang ngumiti. "Theo knew my plans and tried to stop me. So I had to threaten him at the Territory Wars. I need you to go berserk in there, and show everyone what a monster you are. At si Marcella lang ang makakatalo sa'yo. It failed, like the match in the Magus City, so I need to make you break again. Caspian helped you train your magic power, and Theo is a second from telling you everything. Mabuti na lang at alam kong tatanggapin mo ang deal na 'yon at na magco-confess si Theo para hindi ka mapahamak. But breaking you is so impossible! I tried to make the whole world your enemy, but that fucking Wes and Gavin strayed. Ni hindi man lang sila kumurap sa pangungumbinsi ko. At doon sa nightmare city! My goodness, you were so close to breaking but that man was there! Bakit nandoon siya?!"

I kept my cool and my fists clenched as she talked the whole time. Lahat ng nangyari ay siya ang may kagagawan? She let Caspian be killed because he trained me? She knew Theo would confess and die and didn't stop because it would break me more? Akala niya ba ay hindi nakakasira ng bait ang mga nakita ko sa City of Nightmares kung makaakto siya ngayon? Kung wala doon si Wes, baka nga tuluyan na akong nabaliw.

"Sapphire, hindi mo man lang ba naisip na sa ginagawa mong 'yon ay marami kang taong nasaktan?" hindi ko na napigilan ang pagtaas ng boses ko. "You put me in pain. You put us in misery. Para sa ano? Para lang manalo si Marcella? E'di sana sinabi mo na lang sa'kin no'ng una, dahil wala naman akong balak na manalo dito. I've been trying so hard to keep myself lowkey the first cities. Trying so hard to avoid the attention and that leaderboard rankings because I don't care about it! Sana naman tinanong niyo kung anong gusto ko? Bakit hindi niyo man lang naisip na baka ang gusto ko dito ay hindi mga luha at pasakit? Bakit hindi niyo man lang naisip na itanong sa'kin kung may balak ba ako sa ranking na 'yan?!"

Even I could hear and feel the heartbreak in my voice. How it broke at some sentences and how the first tears has already fallen, wetting my cheeks. I punched my chest, as if making a statement, while staring at Sapphire's stunned eyes with determination and pain.

"I don't care about being at the top or being the queen of anything! I don't care about- about those titles! All I want-" I inhaled sharply. "All I want are people who would understand and make me forget my reality. Gusto ko naman naman magkaroon ng mga kaibigang maghahatid ng saya at pahinga sa'kin. I can be the worst player in here, for all I care, basta nandito lang sila sa tabi ko kaya-" my voice broke. "-bakit mo naman sila kinuha? Bakit hindi ka muna nagtanong? Bakit hindi niyo man lang iniisip kung ano mararamdaman ko?"

Mapait akong natawa. "Wala bang... Wala bang halaga 'yong nararamdaman ko? Hindi ba importante 'yong sakit at hirap na pinagdaanan ko? Lagi bang dapat ako ang umintindi sa nangyayari sa inyo?"

"Finn..."

"Oh, June was in pain since she was a child so it's reasonable that she hurts me. Pero paano ako? Nasaktan din naman ako mula noong bata ako, ah. Oh, Marcella is suffering because her life depends on winning and I'm a threat so she can make my life a living hell. Pero hindi naman ako threat, ah? Kung tinanong niyo lang?"

There was a tense silence in the air as we stared at each other.

"Wala ba talaga kayong awa?" pinalis ko ang luha sa pisngi. "I'm already torn to pieces. Before I entered this game, I'm already broken. Pero gaano pa ba kakulang ang pagpira-piraso niyo sa'kin para masayahan kayo?"

Mabibigat ang bawat hininga ko at nawala na rin ang kaninang tuwa sa mukha ni Sapphire. There was a movement in my left side and I knew the boss was already starting to unfreeze.

Natapos na ang sampung minuto na binigay ni Sapphire.

"If you kill the boss, you and your friends can leave the game peacefully. 'Yon ay kung hindi ka mamamatay sa pagkalaban sa kaniya, o makarating sila ng mabilis para matulungan ka." she turned her back at me, walking towards the darkness. "I can't turn this around so show me how far you'll fly. Or let them show me just how determine they are to be your wings."

"Nasisiyahan ka ba?"

Sapphire paused, briefly glancing at me. "Humans emotions are the most entertaining for me."

And she was swallowed by the darkness.

I store away all my pain and anger, focusing on the boss in front of me.

If I kill you, we can be free. If I kill you, this will all stop.

I felt the faint magic inside me and gripped my daggers tightly.

The sparrow will fight.

Even if it means she will burn alone.

Even if it means her wings will die.

-chapter end-