-chapter fifty-eight-

FINN

Nilingon ko si Sapphire nang marinig ang boses niya. She was grinning at me, eyes glinting in amusement.

Bakit 'nice to see you again' ang sinabi niya sa'kin eh nagkita naman kami kanina? Though, it feels useless to ask that to Sapphire, who always had weird answers.

Ngunit kaagad ding nawala ang ngiti niya nang makita ang kalagayan ko. Sapphire quickly took a vial from her inventory, opening the lid and handing it over to me. From the forest-green color that it had, it must be a potion for treatments.

"Drink." Sapphire pushed the vial closer so I had no choice but take it. "Ito 'yong nasugatan ni Marcella, 'di ba?"

I nodded. Kinuha ko ang vial at ininom. While the game offers real-life wounds and deaths, and has no clear player HP level or MP bar, it still possesses the qualities of a normal game. Kaya naman may mga potions pa rin na magagamit - whether to restore energy or treat wounds. Mayroon ding for buffs, na pwede ring makuha sa kinakain, that provides temporary increase in attributes for a limited time.

Kung sa totoong buhay siguro ay parang painkillers ang mga recovery potions.

A green cross sign appeared and floated around the bruise in my left leg, sa baba lang ng tuhod ko. Ito ang natamaan ng lumilipad na kuryente nang mag-ulti ang giant, kaya talagang natumba ako. The pain just suddenly shot up, surprising my whole nerves and numbing my body for a short while. Now, with the recovery potion, unti-unti nang nawawala ang sakit.

"Wait here, Finn. Tatanungin ko lang sina Theo kung mayro'n pa silang potion o 'di kaya ay matulungan ka." Sapphire announced, standing. "Stay here."

Pipigilan ko sana siya at sasabihing okay lang ako pero bigla na lang siyang umalis. Isang buntong hininga na lamang ang pinakawalan ko. Using the nearby tree for support, sinubukan kong tumayo, ignoring the small stinging pain from the bruise.

I think I can fully recover if I just wait here for about ten minutes. Maliit na nga lang naman talaga ang mayro'n sa potion, but if it's enough to walk back to the shore then it's okay.

I sighed again, mentally berating myself. Ayan kasi, Finn, dapat magdala na tayo ng recovery potions.

Ngumuso ako sa sariling naisip. Pero kahit na nagdadala ako eh hindi naman kasi sila nagtatagal... lagi akong may sugat o napupunta sa dangerous situations that they disappear so quickly.

"That girl..."

I visibly stiffened when I heard June's voice from behind. Kaagad akong umikot at umaktong maayos lang. But... June wasn't staring at me. Instead, nakatuon ang mata niya sa papalayong likod ni Sapphire.

I tried to pull my feet towards Sapphire's direction, blocking June's vision. Nakita kong napasulyap siya sa paa ko at tumaas ang kilay niya. I remained emotionless, refusing to give any hint of weaknesses to her.

June is the type of girl who would target the weakness and use it against her opponent. It's a cowardly move, but it's very effective.

"What about her?" kunot-noo kong tanong.

Naningkit lang ang mata ni June sa'kin bago nagkibit-balikat. "Never mind." she said. "I see that you're injured. Did you stumble on a good nest? Ilan ang nakuha mong pera?"

Hindi ako sumagot at taimtim lang siyang tinitigan. When June stepped forwards, I hardened my gaze. Ayokong lumapit siya sa'kin o 'di kaya'y habulin si Sapphire. But if I need to fight, I'm ready to do so.

"Come on, Finn." June smirked. "Hindi kita gagambalain sa city na 'to if you tell me how much money you earned. And- I hope you really answer. It's easy to attack an injured."

"Then, try." malamig kong tugon.

"Ah." umiling si June at sinamaan ako ng tingin. "So stubborn, as always. It won't do you any good-!"

June suddenly disappeared. I blinked, taken aback. It wasn't like she charged to attack me or teleported, dahil malalaman ko ang biglaang pagtaas ng presensiya o magic energy. Talagang nawala lang siya bigla ngunit ramdam ko pa rin ang stable na presensiya niya.

That high perception I had told me that she was running forwards. Bigla na lamang siyang lumitaw sa harap ko, a smirk on her face as she attempted to knee my stomach. Ngunit agad akong humakbang pakanan, shifting my weight to my right feet to take away some burden from the left, before elbowing her raised thigh. Isang malakas na daing ang pinakawalan ni June nang malakas kong matamaan ang hita niya.

Umatras siya at sinamaan ako ng tingin. A red bruise formed in her thigh, at mukhang pilit niya na lang na pinapatayo ang katawan dahil sa matinding sakit.

"Invisibility?" I guessed.

"How much did you earn in the nest?" tanong niya rin.

Nagkatitigan kaming dalawa. Mukhang hindi niya nga titigilan ang pagtanong kung ilan ang nakuha ko. I have no idea what she'll do with the information, though.

"Five hundred."

"Thousands? Damn, that's a good offer." June tsked. "And yes, it's Invisibility. A benefit I got from the Maze. Pretty nice, ain't it?"

Pretty nice para sa mga kagaya mong laging may masamang balak.

"Give me your gold." June casually said, holding up her hand. "Short ako ng ten thousand, but it's entertaining to see you try again. Ayaw mo bang ipakita pa sa kanila ang galing mo bilang Sparrow?"

I narrowed my eyes at her. Even though she said that, she'll probably be fine if she takes one hundred thousand gold. Mas pinagtuunan ko ng pansin ang huli niyang sinabi.

"You imitated me..." tukoy ko sa nangyari noon sa Beast's Castle.

Tumango si June. "Tama ka. I stole Sparrow's identity because that's what they ordered. It's fortunate that... it helps with my plan."

"Plan? Ordered?"

Plano ni June na sirain ang buhay ko sa pagpatay ng mga taong close sa'kin? O ang tuluyang pagreplace sa'kin sa buhay ko? Tsaka... what did she mean by ordered? Kung gano'n ang nangyari, then it wasn't June's choice to steal my identity. Ginawa niya lang iyon dahil inutos sa kaniya at umaayon din sa kaniyang plano.

But who would request of such thing?

"I'd tell you if you'd give me your money."

"No."

June shrugged once again and started to attack me. Napansin kong lahat ng atake niya ay nakapokus sa paa ko. Either she tries to stab it with her dagger o 'di kaya'y sisipain niya ito. Iniiwasan ko lamang ang atake niya, stepping backwards or to the side.

June spinned around, creating a gust of air that travelled towards my direction. Nang medyo makalapit na ito ay may lumipad na nga ice-pick daggers mula sa maliit na ipo-ipo, going straight to me. Kaagad akong nagsummon ng dalawang kunai at itinaas ang kamay para pigilan ito.

Then, I felt June's presence behind me.

I ducked my head, instinctively, making June kick the air above me. May pinakawalan siyang dalawang dagger bago ako sinugod ng suntok. I received each of her blows with my palms up, gritting my teeth at the forming pain in my leg.

Narinig ko ang tunog ng lumilipad na daggers sa likod. I gave it a quick glance, noticing that they were the daggers June let out earlier. I turned my body to the side - the blade swishing past through me, only inches apart, before landing towards June. Ngunit mabilis niyang ginamit ang wind magic para ihagis ang mga ito palayo at hatakin ang kamay ko, before flipping me towards the ground.

I let out a pained gasp when my knee hit the ground. June pulled me by the back of my shirt, turning me around and punching me straight to the gut. Malakas akong napaubo sa gulat at sakit na naramdaman.

Nang makitang balak niyang ulitin ang suntok ay mabilis kong hinawakan ang kamao niya. Then, without a second thought, I twisted her hand and placing my other palm on her chest. Malakas ko siyang itinulak papunta sa puno kaya naman malakas siyang napamura.

June strongly glared at me, one that I returned fiercely.

Masakit na ang buong katawan ko at alam kong gano'n din siya, ngunit bakas pa rin sa mga mata namin ang apoy ng galit. This was probably the first time that we've expressed ourselves in a fight, and not just meaningless words. This was like a chance to pour out our emotions by the use of fists, and not words.

Nagpalitan kami ng sipa at suntok, adding our own magic and weapons in between. It was when June elbowed my face and it turned to the side for a while - I was waiting for her to move - that it happened. Sa gilid ng mata ko'y nakita ko ang dala-dalang dagger ni June sa kamay at tumakbo siya papunta sa'kin.

I was ready. Really.

Alam kong papunta na siya at inihanda ko na ang hawak na kunai para sana itapon palayo ang weapon niya.

That's when it happened.

Naramdaman ko ang pagtulak sa'kin sa gilid at isang malakas na daing. I turned around in surprise and saw that June also had her eyes wide open in shock.

But it was too late.

Ang dagger na hawak niya ay nakasaksak na kay Depore.

I felt my heart dropped when Depore coughed out blood. Binawi ni June ang hawak na dagger at napaatras, a small gasp leaving her mouth. I quickly scrambled up when I noticed that Depore was losing her balance, catching her as she fell.

No!

Depore blinked at me. Nang makita niyang maayos lang ang kabuuan ko ay ngumiti siya.

"I'm glad..." she tried to say, voice starting to weaken. "... you're safe."

Parang tumigil ang buong mundo ko nang maramdaman ang nanghihina niyang katawan. There was a large lump forming in my throat, at parang nahihirapan akong huminga.

Hindi ako makasagot. Hindi ako makagalaw. Just like all those times I witnessed this happening, there was nothing I could do.

I was just a small, helpless bird whose feathers are slowly dying.

"Nandito ba si Finn, Sapphire?"

Nanlaki ang mata ni June nang marinig ang mga boses. Itinago niya ang weapon na dala at naging blanko ang buong mukha niya. Kahit na gano'n, she appears to be breathing heavily.

"This is your fault, Finn. Your fault! You killed her! Yes, you killed her..." halatang hindi siya mapakali at naglalakad-lakad lang. "Ikaw ang may gawa nito at hindi ako!"

Depore tugged my hand so I returned my eyes to her. My eyes welled up when I saw her face.

"Not your... fault. It's a big sis-sister's..." nahihirapan na siyang huminga. "Job. To protect their y-younger siblings..."

Stop talking, please. Stop talking so your wounds can heal, so you'll be alright. Please, be alright.

Gusto kong sabihin lahat ng 'yon but my mouth won't move.

"Bakit may naririnig akong boses? Akala ko ba mag-isa lang siya?"

June, who was staring behind me, gave me a final glance before going invisible. I couldn't say or react to anything as I held Depore in my arms. Death... Will this result to death again?

When will I stop losing someone dear to me? Would it be better for them if I just disappear completely?

Kung gano'n ba, would they be much more happier?

Would they be safer?

Would they be alive?

"Ate Deanne!"

Nabasag ang mga iniisip ko nang marinig ang boses ni Kairo. Right now, the voice that once sounded word became haunting. Parang hindi ko siya kayang tingnan, kahit na nakita kong huminto na siya sa harap namin.

Then, Kairo fell to his knees. His face was filled with horror - eyes wide in both fear and anger. Bumaba ang tingin niya sa kamay kong nakapatong sa sugat ni Ate Depore nang saluhin ko siya.

I felt a sharp sting on my hand when Kairo slapped my hand. The sound of dagger flying away made the others gasp in surprise. I felt terror run in my veins when I realized... that I was still holding the dagger I wanted to use earlier. Para sana 'yon depensahan ang atake ni June.

Ngunit iba ata ang nasa isip ni Kairo.

"How could you, Finn?! How-!"

The lump in my throat grew larger and heavier when Kairo lightly pushed me away. Hindi ko siya matingnan sa mata pero alam kong puno ito ng galit at sakit. Tears freely fell to his cheeks and he sobbed, scooping Depore's weakening body to his chest.

Hindi ako makagalaw.

"Ate..." Kairo lightly tapped Depore's cheeks. "A-Ate, huwag kang magjoke. Acting lang 'yong ayoko sa'yo... p-pero ikaw ang pinaka-the best na magiging partner ni Kuya. Kaya-kaya, please, huwag mo siyang iwan..."

"...Kai...ser..." Depore whispered. "Love him..."

"Yes, yes." tumango-tango si Kairo. "Mahal na mahal ka din niya, kaya huwag mo siyang iwan. Huwag sa ganitong paraan. You can't die in a game, you practically live for it! 'Di ba? Ate... Ate, 'di ba?"

Depore's eyes fluttered open, and Kairo desperately tried to cover the large wound in her stomach. Maraming dugo na ang nawawala sa kaniya.

"Kairo...?"

"Oo, ate. Ako 'to. Si Kairo. Ang pasaway na kapatid ni Kuya, 'di ba?"

Mahinang tumawa si Depore ngunit nauwi iyon sa sunod-sunod na ubo.

"D-Don't push yourself to talk, Ate. We can try and treat you."

Umiling si Depore. "Too... late. But, it's nice to hear... you calling me A-Ate-" she coughed. "Kailangan ko lang pala mamatay-"

"Don't joke like that! You promised to tell me something after we survive this game so don't die!"

Mas lalo akong nanigas nang maalala na may dinadala sa sinapupunan si Depore. It wasn't just one death that I caused, no? It was... freaking two.

"Hindi tayo naka-survive- kaya..."

Kairo shook Depore when her eyes started to fall close. Sina Eura naman na kasama niya ay kanina pang tinatry gamutin ang sugat ni Depore. But it was not helping to the amount of blood she lost.

"Finn..." she whispered, getting everyone's attention. "Please... protect-"

Kairo froze when Depore's eyes fully closed, her chest rising once before stopping permanently. Naramdaman ko ang panghihina ng buong katawan sa nangyari.

I felt empty.

Hindi ako makagalaw. Hindi ko maibuka ang bibig. Nahihirapan akong huminga.

"You- Finn!"

Eura and Theo tried to stop Kairo, pero mabilis niya akong nahatak sa shirt. Now, I was forced to look at his grey eyes. He was clutching my shirt, crumpling it with his fist, as tears streamed down his face.

"Bakit mo ginawa 'yon?! Ate Deanne was nothing but supportive of you so why did you kill her?!"

Basag na basag ang boses ni Kairo nang sabihin iyon, na parang binasag na rin ang puso ko. Naramdaman ko ang pagbasa ng sariling pisngi at ang mahina kong paghikbi.

"Kairo." I finally whispered. "Didn't-"

"Anong didn't?! I saw you, Finn! Your dagger was in her stomach! You- You-"

Parang gusto niya akong suntukin sa galit o saktan kagaya ng kasalukuyan niyang nararamdaman, pero napayuko lang siya. Kairo pushed his head to my chest, his shoulders shaking as he sobbed.

"Bakit ikaw pa ang pumatay sa kaniya...?"

"Kairo. Wasn't me-" umiling-iling ako kahit na hindi niya nakikita. "I didn't kill Ate Depore-"

"Stop lying!"

Sobrang hina ng pagkakatulak niya pero napaatras pa rin ako dito.

"I saw you, Finn..."

"I promise. I didn't-"

"Mabuti pang umalis ka na lang."

Natigilan ako sa sinabi niya. Sobrang lamig ng boses niya na hindi ako makagalaw. Kairo now stared at me, ruthlessly blank, just like all those times where he faked all his emotions. Sa mga panahong ginagawa niyang dark ang image niya.

"But-"

"Umalis ka na lang, Finn. Hindi kita kayang tingnan o pakinggan ngayon." blanko niyang tugon. Kairo's jaw clenched and he everted his gaze. "Baka kung ano pa ang magawa ko sa galit."

"Have to explain-"

"Just fucking go away!"

I flinched when he shouted at me.

"Damn it!" Kairo loudly cursed, glaring at the ground. "Please, umalis ka na lang. Kung hindi ka pa aalis sa isang minuto, talagang hindi mo magugustuhan ang gagawin ko."

Should I care about what will happen to me kung may pagkakataon akong sabihin sa kaniya ang totoo?

If it results to a death or not, I'd do anything. Not to clean my own name, but to deliver true justice.

It doesn't matter if Kairo believes me or not. Ang mas importante ay ang masabi ko at malaman niya ang totoo, 'di ba?

Isa pa, if death was punishment, shouldn't I be a bit happy? Sa ganoong paraan, wala na akong masasaktan na tao.

For I bring nothing but death.

And death... is much better than the loneliness that's eating away my heart.

I felt a hand pull me away, my body being dragged along. Nakatuon pa rin ang mata ko sa grupo na umiiyak sa gitna ng isang katawan.

Maybe if I did die, would they be happier? Would they be freer?

Biglang umikot ang paningin ko. Ang grupong tinititigan ko ay napalitan ng itim na shirt. There was a hand behind my head, cradling me to his chest. His other hand caressed my back softly.

"Let it all out, Finley. I will never leave your side."

When I heard Wes grounding voice, I couldn't help the uncontrolled sobs that left my mouth.

And he hid all of my tears from the world.

-chapter end-