“Bad Girlfriend,” by Theory of a Dead Man,

From Scars and Souvenirs, 2008, Songwriters:

Tyler Connolly, Christine Danielle Connolly.

A/N: Adult Content; Explicit Language

I have a song for you today,

Listening fun for blue Monday.

In February, we tend to brood;

Look to create a better mood.

“Bad Girlfriend” does that for me;

It’s not to be taken seriously.

It’s naughty and it’s nice,

It will give you no advice.

So sit back; take a break,

In this cool song do partake.

“Bad Girlfriend”

My Girlfriend's a dick magnet
My Girlfriend got a have it
She's hot, can't stop, up on stage, doing shots,
Tip the man he'll ring the bell, get her drunk she'll scream like hell
Dirty girl, gettin' down, dance with guys from outta town
Grab her ass, actin' tough
Mess with her, she'll fuck you up
No one really knows if she's drunk or if she's stoned,
But she's comin' back to my place tonight

She likes to shake her ass she grinds it to the beat
She likes to pull my hair when I make her grind her teeth
I like to strip her down she's naughty till the end
You know what she is, no doubt about it
She's a bad, bad girlfriend

Red thong, party's on,
Love this song, sing along
Come together, leave alone, see you later back at home
No one really knows if she's drunk or if she's stoned
But she's coming back to my place tonight. I say
No one really knows just how far she's gonna go,
But I'm gonna find out later tonight.

She likes to shake her ass she grinds it to the beat
She likes to pull my hair when I make her grind her teeth
I like to strip her down she's naughty till the end
You know what she is, no doubt about it
She's a bad, bad girlfriend

Doesn't take her long to make things right
But does it make her wrong to have the time of her life?
The time of her life

(My girlfriend's a dick magnet My girlfriend's gotta have it)

She's a gold digger now you figure out it's over, pull the trigger
Futures finished, there it went, savings gone
The money spent

I look around and all I see is, no good, bad and ugly
Man she's hot and fixed to be, the future
Ex-Miss Connolly!

She likes to shake her ass she grinds it to the beat
She likes to pull my hair when I make her grind her teeth
I like to strip her down she's naughty till the end
You know what she is, no doubt about it
She's a bad, bad girlfriend

Once in a while, a song will perk me up, make me

flip out, if you will, and want to listen to it over

and over again, sending me to the store to purchase

the album.  “Bad Girlfriend” is that kind of song.  The

radio stations censored the lyrics, creating blanks in

all the good parts.  The video does that as well.  The

written lyrics spell it out to us though, as does the song

when we hear the album version. I am not one to post my

own work using four letter words, and I can’t say reading

posts with that sort of verbiage makes me like them any

better, but this song is just such fun, I find myself tapping

my foot and smiling through the whole piece. I also found

that when I took a close look at the lyrics,I gained a

different perspective.

Nothing like a catchy first line to set the tone for a poem/song,

and “my girlfiend’s a dick magnet” surely does that!  The

first verse portrays the girlfriend as “hot.”  She likes to party

and behave outrageously in public.  He wonders what she’ll

do next, but she’s his girlfriend; he’ll “find out later tonight.”

The rousing chorus follows:

She likes to shake her ass she grinds it to the beat
She likes to pull my hair when I make her grind her teeth
I like to strip her down she's naughty till the end
You know what she is, no doubt about it
She's a bad, bad girlfriend

He describes her dancing lewdly, driving him and all the

guys wild. He casually boasts in the next line:”she likes

to pull my hair when I make her grind her teeth.” She’s

“naughty till the end.”  She’s a “bad, bad girlfriend.” In the

‘sixties, we would say something was “bad,” when we actually

 meant that it was good. She’s his girlfriend; she goes home

with him. He enjoys her sexuality, makes her grind her teeth.

 She’s not so bad.

The bridge of the song follows.  We get another glimmering

 that while he says how bad she is, these lines tell us that

 he’s proud of her, and that he's looking past her behavior.

“Doesn't take her long to make things right
But does it make her wrong to have the time of her life?”

The last verse describes a gold digging, bad girlfriend, a

high maintenance woman, and now, all his “savings gone,

money spent.” But he looks at her, and what he sees is “no

good, bad and ugly. Man she's hot and fixed to be, the future

Ex-Miss Connolly!”  He feels that it won’t work out between

them, but he is going to marry her anyway. It is left to our

imagination whether the bad girlfriend will be a bad wife.

“Bad Girlfriend” ends with the chorus, taking us back to the bar

and the antics of the party girl.

Theory of a Dead Man’s lead guitarist, Tyler Connolly, co-wrote

“Bad Girlfriend” with his wife, Canadian actress Christine Danielle.

Christine Danielle Connolly is the lyricist. I hope you have enjoyed

listening to this lively song, with its “bad” lyrics