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Swippity swappity get out of that body

outsidersandBTS4life that I had intended to be in the last book but it took too long to write

Hope you enjoy it!

EDIT: TW BULLYING

https://www.bullying.co.uk/

https://www.nationalbullyinghelpline.co.uk/contact.html

https://www.anti-bullyingalliance.org.uk/tools-information/if-youre-being-bullied/find-help-and-support



"You're such a dick!" Robin yelled, throwing whatever was closest at Red Robin.

"No bad words," Nightwing called, not taking his eyes off the computer.

"I didn't say anything!" he defended. He managed to catch the object thrown at him which happened to be a water bottle and scowled at the younger. Their hatred for one another was well known and they made sure everyone knew it. "Stop fighting with your brother," Nightwing added. 

"Dick make them stop!" Red Hood complained. The older glared at him from across the room where he'd situated himself over an hour ago. When he chose that place to sit, he didn't expect to be interrupted by the hurricane that was his brothers but here he was. "If it bothers you so much then stop them yourself, I'm really busy here," he snapped. 

"It's not my job to keep them in line, it's yours," the younger barked back. 

"I am this close to knocking all of you out, just try me," Nightwing warned, showing his fingers. The brothers spared him a glance. 

"Your fingers are touching," Red Robin pointed out.  

"Ex-fucking-actly." 

"But he started it! If he wasn't such a brat, we wouldn't be in this situation!" Red Robin defended. 

"No way! If you weren't so far up your own ass I wouldn't have anything to fight over!" Robin protested, stomping his foot defiantly. Nightwing groaned frustratedly and slammed his head on the desk. Unfortunately, he didn't do it hard enough to knock himself out. 



As the remaining three brothers who still had some will to live at that point raged on, Black Canary walked into the living room. She wasn't surprised to find them arguing given that most of the Young Justice team were disgruntedly sitting on the floor in the training room to escape the fighting. She glanced over to Nightwing who was now repeatedly hitting his head against the desk in hopes of escaping the sound and huffed. Assuming that he'd already attempted to play peacekeeper, she decided that this issue was getting out of hand. Whenever two or more of them were in the same place there was always an argument. She was getting a headache just remembering all their fights. "Stop it!" she screamed. They all stopped and looked to her, only now acknowledging that she'd entered the room. "Everyone is sick of you lot fighting like cats and dogs."

"How do you think I feel?" Nightwing groaned. 

"Look, you're running your poor brother ragged. Batman has already signed off on counselling for you boys and it's time we cash in on that," she announced. All of them huffed at the mention of counselling but they knew better than to fight with Black Canary. "Report to the counsel room tomorrow at 7 am."

"I have school at 8:30 am," Robin pointed out.

"I'm aware," she responded before swiftly leaving the room.

"We're gonna regret going to that, aren't we?" Red Hood said.



They did as they were told and reported to the counselling room at 7 am although some of them looked worse for wear. "How do you look like that?" Red Hood asked, sending Nightwing a glare. He couldn't have finished patrol more than two hours ago and here he was looking like he'd just got off a catwalk at London fashion week. "Good genes my dear brother," he answered with a smirk. They situated themselves on the green chairs before Black Canary and Zatanna walked in. "Good morning bat brats," Zatanna greeted, getting a swift glare from the youngest. 

"Let's cut to the chase here, I've got work to do," Red Robin stated as he tapped his foot impatiently.

"Then you'll be happy to know that I won't be taking too much of your time," Black Canary announced. "Zatanna here will temporarily swap your consciousness so you can live a day in each other's lives. Maybe when you understand the pressure you're all under, the fighting will lessen."

"I'm not going into Robin's body. I refuse to be that small again," Nightwing commented.

"I've deliberated with Zatanna on who should swap with who. Nightwing and Red Hood will swap since Nightwing is a peacemaker and Red Hood is an enabler. Red Robin and Robin will swap since they hate each other's guts," Black Canary explained. "Now, are you ready?" They looked at one another. They really didn't have a choice in this so there was no point in putting it off. "Let's just get this over with," Red Hood said, unamused.

"Ydob taht fo tou teg ytippaws ytippiws!" Zatanna cast, flicking her wrists at the end. When the boys, opened their eyes, they were in their assigned bodies for the day.

"Oh God Jay, are you drunk?"



Having the day off from school sounded like a dream. No more having to deal with cretins and no more bullheaded jocks thinking they were the next best thing. One day they'd slip up and Robin would beat their ass for it. Damian thought that he could do what he wanted all day but then he remembered what he had to do in Tim's place. He had 15 different cases to finish writing up by the end of the day. In theory, this seemed quite easy. He had Tim's notes and he could type things up fairly fast so it didn't seem like a problem. Then it got to midday and he only had three cases done. How was he supposed to do all of this work, train and then go to a mission? There was no way he could finish all this. He guessed that was why Tim was always so on edge but he couldn't feel bad about it. Tim poked the bear all the time! He started half the arguments and sure, maybe just maybe, Damian was the cause of the other half but Tim should know better. He was the older one. 


Damian felt tired beyond belief and he hadn't even started training yet. His eyes hurt from staring at a screen all day and he felt a constant need to crack his fingers. His back hurt from being so hunched over but there was no other position he could be in where he could concentrate on working. Tim must have a private chiropractor or something to deal with his back. Either that or he didn't have a spine. Maybe he was like a cat and could just act like a fluid. As he continued to work, he frowned to himself. Tim must find it hard to juggle a social life and work life. Unless he didn't have either. They all had that separation but Tim might not. He was basically working 24 hours. Sure, Damian liked the idea of doing hero work all the time but he knew that he couldn't. He had to have the separation to be a kid. Did Tim ever have that? Perhaps that's what made him so irritable. He was tired of working all the time and Damian didn't exactly help his mood. Damn, Tim had it harder than he previously thought. Maybe he could be a little more patient with the older. Not too much, he wasn't very patient in the first place.



Jason felt horrible all day. He couldn't place his finger on what it was but he knew it made him just want the ground to swallow him up. No matter what he was doing, he felt like he wanted to just go to bed and wish the world away. Did Dick feel like this all the time? He couldn't do. He was always so perky. Before they all annoyed him with their fighting of course. Jason, almost naively, thought that when he went to work things would be better. He got in and was immediately told he'd be working by himself that day. "What do you mean I don't have a partner? We're supposed to be in twos," he'd argued.

"I don't know why you're suddenly so angry about this Grayson. You know we've had staff shortages for ages," the commissioner reminded him. Jason stared at him angrily but he didn't fight it anymore. He couldn't be bothered. Normally he'd fight till he had no more air left in his lungs but today he didn't feel like it. 


As he got ready for his patrol shift he was informed that there were no more bulletproof vests. He went slack-jawed upon being told that he would have to go out in a crime-ridden city without any form of protection from being shot. Once again he was told that they'd been having these issues for a while and it was weird of him to be surprised by it. He couldn't believe it. Dick had to go out and protect a city day and night with no protection other than his gun which he'd never use in the first place. So he was out with nothing. Whilst on one of the very few pitt stops he had, he had to plan the mission for the Young Justice team. After looking over the case and the notes, Jason felt anxious almost. The writings were near feverish. Every single outcome of how this mission could go was written out in near gruesome detail. Jason got shivers just looking at some of those. One of the outcomes was all the team are slaughtered and then how should they be removed from the site before the public can see. He hoped Dick didn't think about this stuff too much. Maybe that was what he was thinking about when he stared into space. Jason didn't like that. When he finally got home, he was tasked with training. Despite having to run five blocks after a shoplifter only to receive a kick in the nuts, he still had to train. Jason felt tired already but now he had to work for another three hours? He wanted to jack it in, he was so tired. Then again, Dick would probably beat his ass for messing up his work routine. 



At first, Tim thought this would be the easiest day he'd had in a while. He always found school a breeze and it'd be a fun time to just sit around doing the work. He'd probably bump up Damian's GPA. As he walked out the door to go to school, Bruce caught him by the arm. "I don't want to hear about any more fights. You're a Wayne. You're better than that," Bruce told him in a stern tone. Tim nodded and hoped that would be enough of an answer. It seemed to be and his arm was released. Of course, the demon spawn was getting in fights. He probably picked on the dumber kids that he knew he'd get a reaction from. How Dick could like this kid would always be a mystery. When he walked into school, Tim immediately noticed all the looks that were shot his way. He noticed that half were mocking and the other half were intimidated. He wondered how Damian could receive such a split but he didn't care too much to delve into it. When he got to class and sat down, another student put something on his desk. He raised an eyebrow at them then picked up the paper and turned it over. It was a picture of Dick? Oh fuck it was a picture of Dick when he used to be a stripper. He crumpled the picture up and went to the student's desk. "What the hell is this?" he snapped, slamming it down.

"It's your whore of a brother, remember?" they responded, a smirk on their face.

"Don't you dare-"

"Damian, I think we'd both like a lesson without you causing a fuss," the teacher announced.

"But he just called my brother a whore!"

"And you'll need to learn to deal with that. Back to your seat."

"But-"

"To your seat," the teacher demanded. Tim glared at her and stomped back to his seat. This was bullshit. How many times did that happen? Is that why Damian was getting in so many fights? He guessed that'd make him angry all the time too. He'd probably be less of a dick about it though.


At lunch, the same student came up to him again. Tim glared at them. The student was your typical jock. Even wore the varsity jacket to prove it. "Have you got over your little temper tantrum this morning?" they asked, a sneer in their tone.

"Fuck off," Tim spat. He couldn't stand to look at them.

"Me and the boys were gonna catfish your brother but then we remembered he was a faggot too."

"Leave him alone." The jock chuckled at him, mocking him. Tim wanted to punch them in the face. He'd probably get away with killing them. No, he could definitely get away with it. Throw their body in a ditch and smile about it later. God no wonder why Damian got in fights. "Or what?" Tim squinted and studied them. Severe acne, oily hair, small patches of hair seemed to be missing and sloppily covered up with a comb-over, stunted height, and gynecomastia. Tim smirked. "Or I'll tell your coach you're shooting up."

"You fucking brat-"

"I wouldn't do anything if I was you. I know your dirty little secret and if you want me to keep it that way, you'll leave me and my brother alone. Got it?" They huffed and got up. Tim got a bit more confident and stood up as he walked off. "Oh and you can tell your friends that if they want to mess with me too, I'll find even more dirt and who knows? I might accidentally let something slip to just the right person," he added. That ought to give Damian a month. It was at that moment when Tim paused and reflected on Damian. Poor kid. He had to deal with this bullshit and from the looks of it, no one was in his corner. He wondered if Dick knew. Then again, if the bullying was because of Dick, Damian wouldn't tell him that. He was blunt but he knew Dick well enough that'd break his heart if he was the cause of the bullying. Maybe Damian wasn't that bad after all. He was still a little shit though. 



Dick was bored. Incredibly bored. He had nothing to do. No one to see. There were no cases to do. There were no missions to go on. All he had to do was watch TV and train. He decided to train for most of the day and felt achy very quickly. He guessed his regiment was more vigorous than Jason's. He noticed that his apartment felt lonely. Like there was no sense of homeliness about it. It was just a place to live and, from the looks of it, store Jack Daniels. Dick shrugged to himself. When in Rome he guessed. He poured himself a shot and downed it. There wasn't that usual sting. How much did Jason drink? Maybe he should sign him up to an AA group or something. He doubted drinking made his aim any better. 


He took the opportunity of being in Jason's body to add his number to the group chat the bat siblings had. It was purely to bitch about Bruce and Jason would surely appreciate that. As he added the number and gave himself a stupid nickname, a text came through. He perked up at seeing at least one person was trying to contact him and quickly tapped on it. He wished it was an invite to a mission or at least a reminder to do some work that Jason forgot to tell him about. The message was neither of those things. It was from Bruce. Shit. "I heard about the Johnson incident and you're barred from the manor as well as family missions. I'm not going to let you influence Damian with your stupid need for guns."

"Motherfucker," Dick growled. He knew Bruce well and this was one of his tactics. Guilt-tripping. He promised not to do it anymore but here he was doing it. Out of interest, Dick scrolled up on the conversations. There were hardly any responses to what Bruce said but he wouldn't reply to that stuff either. All of it was just abuse wrapped up in mock concern. He scowled at the phone. Maybe it was the alcohol fueling his anger or he was feeling extra confident being in someone else's body but he decided he wouldn't let this continue. "You can bar me all you like but you can't bar me from everyone. Even Dick thinks you're a fuckwit when you act like this. If the next thing you tell me isn't an apology, then consider yourself blocked because I'm not gonna take this bull anymore." He put the phone down and turned on the TV. Sure he loved Bruce but Dick's loyalty had long since shifted to stay with his brothers. 



When the brothers all got back to the Mountain, they were exhausted and, in Dick's case, a little drunk. He may have gotten a little carried away with the Jack Daniels but there was already a replacement bottle under the sink just in case Jason got mad at him. They convened in the counselling room and whilst they were waiting, Dick spoke up. "Uhm Jay, I added you to the group chat. I know what you're going to say and I-"

"Thanks," Jason interrupted. 

"What?"

"I said thanks. Probably should've joined it a while ago. I'm uh, I'm sorry about your work. It fucking sucks there," he continued. Dick chuckled at him. He guessed it was another shortage day. "It's not so bad when you get used to it."

"Speaking of things that suck, I have to give it to you Demon Spawn, your day sucked," Tim stated. Damian seemed surprised by the admission. "Talked to that jock though. Those lot won't be bothering you for a while."

"I could've handled it on my own," the younger defended. Though there was a softness to his tone that suggested he was thankful. Tim knew better than to expect a thank you from the kid. He was much too stubborn for that. "I suggest you set yourself some stricter work hours," Damian added. 

"Why?"

"You clearly don't have a distinguishing difference between work and relaxation time. No wonder you're so irritable."

"Careful Damian, I might just think you care about me," Tim tutted.

"Hardly." 

"I see none of you are arguing," Zatanna stated. She smiled at the sound of simple chatter rather than shouting. It was a rare thing to hear so she was going to enjoy it for as long as she could. "Did you all learn something today?" They glanced at one another and shrugged.

"You could say that," Jason responded on their behalf. 

"Well, you're not yelling at each other so that's something. Ready to go back to your bodies?" 

"Yes!"

"Ydob ruoy ot kcab ytippaws ytippiws."

"Oh God Goldie, am I drunk?"

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