Neither of them moved when he cried, but he wished they would. He wished Stefan would do what he always did and jump up to look after him. But he'd messed up. It was his fault. He was so stupid, and he was about to lose his only friends because he was a bad drunk.

It felt too similar, except this time he'd done something to warrant losing his friends. He should have known he would lose them again, what else could have possibly happened? He just wanted to be happy for once in his short and awful life and he couldn't even have that. It was his fault. There was no one to blame but him.

But he needed to at least explain himself first and he couldn't do that with Renee staring at him the way she was, like she didn't even care about him all. He tried to fight off the awful things his mind threw at him. Things like she never cared about him in the first place, but he knew that was a lie.

"Can I talk to Stefan alone about it?" he asked.

"Pfft, no," she replied.

"It's got nothing to do with you though."

"Bullshit, I want to know why you went off at your friend for no damn reason."

He let out a groan and wiped at his cheeks. "Because I was drunk and having an anxiety attack, is that good enough for you?" he asked, glaring at her. If he was calmer, he'd never look at her in such a way, but he was so damn angry. He knew even when he asked Stefan to wait until they were done moving that he wasn't going to escape the conversation, but that didn't stop him from being angry about it.

"Renee," Stefan said, his voice calm and collected. "It's alright, I promise. We'll explain it to you when we're done, alright?"

Renee scoffed and stood from the chair. "Whatever, do what you want," she said. "I'm going to go wait for the pizzas to get here." She disappeared from the apartment in a second, the door closing behind her with a thud.

Hugo and Stefan sat in silence for a moment before Hugo finally lifted his hands to explain. "I was extremely drunk," he began, pausing to stare at the floor.

"I noticed," Stefan said.

"Let me explain. I was really drunk and there were a lot of people. I was freaking out. The more I drank, the worse it got. Renee left at some point and it just got worse. She didn't come back. I was alone," he explained, taking a deep breath to calm down. "I had no idea where you were. I hadn't seen you all night. Because I was drunk and anxious I began to think you didn't like me-"

"That's not true!"

"I know, alright? I was drunk and stupid and not having a very good time. I was overwhelmed and I shouldn't have drunk as much as I did. But I did eventually find you and I tried waving you over. You looked at me, or in my direction at least, but you didn't even see me. That was the last straw for my dumbass drunk brain.

"I left and I don't know what happened after that or even how you knew I was out there. But that was why I exploded. Because I was stupid and convinced that you hated me. And it makes it so much worse that I really-" He stopped short, so ready to spill the words but knowing that it would never end well.

Stefan scooted closer to him on the couch and placed a hand on his knee. "Really what?" he asked.

Hugo shook his head. "It doesn't matter," he replied. And it didn't, shouldn't. He couldn't let it matter.

Stefan sighed then and looked down at the ground. "Renee came and told me that she saw you leaving, so I chased after you," he said, looking up at him again. "Hugo, I didn't even know you were at my party. There were so many people constantly trying to talk to me. I don't even think I got around to everyone. I'm sorry I made you feel like I didn't like you-"

Hugo cut him off with a hand over his mouth. "Don't," he signed when he pulled away. "You have nothing to apologise for. I was drunk and stupid. I didn't reply to your texts because I was embarrassed. I thought I ruined your birthday. Every time I looked at our messages, I got too anxious to reply. I'm sorry I snapped and I'm sorry I didn't reply to you and I'm sorry I ruined your birthday."

Stefan barked out a laugh then, startling Hugo and making him jump back in his seat. "You didn't ruin my birthday, you lump,'' he said and pulled Hugo towards him. Hugo rested his head against the other man's shoulder, savouring the warmth. "I'm just glad I didn't do something to make you upset. You're just a dumb drunk. Who knew?"

Hugo pulled away to smile at him, grateful that nothing bad had happened. "I'm still sorry," he signed, his hands grazing Stefan's chest as he did.

"And I forgive you. I'm glad we're okay. Just remind me not to let you drink that much again. And to supervise you at parties." Hugo huffed out a laugh and bit down on his lip. They were so close to each other, faces only a few inches apart. He could just lean forward before either of them had time to think about it. He'd face the consequences later. It wouldn't take much, just a few inches.

The door swung open and it was then that he realised he leaned forward a little without meaning to. The pair jolted away from each other and Hugo jumped from the couch, earning a confused looked from Renee. It took him until she was in the tiny kitchen with the boxes of pizza that he realised Stefan's eyes were open, that he knew what was about to happen and that he hadn't pulled away.

With red-stained cheeks, he grabbed a slice of pizza. He hadn't opened any of the boxes that held the plates, but it didn't matter. Over dinner, he and Stefan explained everything that had happened at the party and as expected, she called him an idiot. But she apologised for being snappy. He did understand why, it had just annoyed him.

"You're a dumbass," she said. "But we're okay. I was drunk too. I honestly forgot who I was talking to half the time. I barely remember any of the night."

"We're all bad drunks," Stefan replied with a laugh that made butterflies erupt in Hugo's stomach. He clicked his fingers and made a noise that made Hugo jump. "I forgot to tell you. I gave Tomas your email so you can do all that editing stuff. He said he'll email you when he gets home."

He'd completely forgotten about Tomas in all the mess he'd been facing. "Thank you," he replied, surprised that Stefan had even bothered to do something like that when they weren't getting along.

Renee, who sat on one of the dining chairs they'd brought it, chucked the tv remote to Hugo. "Come on, we picked out a movie. Put it on," she ordered. Hugo gave her a small smile and sorted out the old television his father had given him. A lot of his furniture was second hand, but it didn't matter. It did what he needed it to.

He barely paid any attention to the movie. He'd seen it a thousand times before with both his father and Renee and Stefan. He zoned it out, focusing mostly on his thoughts and the warm presence of Stefan next to him on the couch. Their knees were touching, but that was it, even though Hugo longed for more.

He couldn't push away thoughts of what happened earlier. Stefan hadn't pulled away. Surely, he'd noticed what Hugo had been about to do. He'd seen it in his eyes, he'd wanted it. Hugo didn't know what to do with that information. He'd spent so long believing that Stefan only saw him as a friend, but maybe he'd been wrong.

Maybe he could do something about it. Stefan cared for him and looked after him when he was anxious. He knew how to deal with it, so maybe a relationship with him wouldn't spark as much anxiety as he'd first expected. All he had to do was grow enough courage to actually ask him out instead of randomly planting one on him.

Partway through the movie, Stefan's heavy frame landed on his, his head leaning on Hugo's shoulder. Hugo looked down at him in confusion, but Stefan only grumbled and within a few seconds, was fast asleep. The moving had tired all three of them out.

"Pfft, lightweight," Renee said, smiling fondly at him. "I can wake him for you if you want. That doesn't look too comfortable for you."

"No, it's alright," Hugo replied and adjusted his position so that they were both a little more comfortable.

Renee shrugged. "Alright, but I'll wake him when the movie is done so I can take him home. You haven't got the room for us here yet." One day he would and that thought brought more joy to him than he expected it would.

He had a home of his own now. He could have friends over whenever he wanted. He wouldn't have to deal with his father anymore unless he went home for whatever reason. Looking after himself was somewhat terrifying, but having some independence after so long was freeing and exciting. The only issue would be getting to and from work, as it was now further away.

He tightened his grip on Stefan's sleeping form and smiled at the movie. Renee made a noise and he ignored it, thinking it was directed at the movie. "You really should do something about that, you know," she said, an amused smile on her face.

"What?" he asked, his face scrunching up in confusion.

She gestured to him and Stefan. "Whatever the hell it is you two have going on. You should do something about it," she replied. "To be honest, I thought you already had something together."

"Nothing is going on between us."

"Well, there should be. You guys are cuddling for crying out loud." She kept her voice low to not disturb Stefan, but there was a cheerful grin on her face. Her words were the truth. They were technically cuddling, weren't they? Maybe it didn't count because Stefan was asleep. He had no idea. "Just hurry up and get together already."

"But... Stefan doesn't..."

Renee shot him a look as if she was annoyed with him. "He does. He wouldn't have been so upset about all this week if he didn't. He thought he'd done something to hurt you. I don't think I've ever seen him so worried about someone before."

Hugo glanced down at him, teeth chewing his bottom lip. He looked so peaceful in his sleep, so pretty. "Then why doesn't he say anything?" he asked. It would be so much easier if he did. All Hugo would have to say was 'yes'. He wouldn't have to fight off his anxiety to ask him out.

"I don't know," Renee said with a shrug. "Because he's an idiot, I guess. I'll try and push him to say something. I figured you wouldn't be up for asking him out."

Hugo shook his head, wishing that he could just do it. Why was it so hard to get the words out? "I'm not," he replied and sighed. "Just don't tell him I like him."

"How am I supposed to convince him to ask you out if I can't tell him you like him?" Renee asked, running a hand over her almost bald scalp.

"I want to be the one to tell him," Hugo answered. He probably wouldn't be able to ask him out, but he could at least tell him that if it ever came up. He wanted Stefan to hear it from his mouth, not someone else's.

Renee smiled at him. "Alright, Hugo. I just want you two to be happy," she said and focused back on the movie again. Hugo tried to join her, but all he could think about was what it would be like to be with Stefan. For the first time in a week, he had a smile on his face.