this is a double update! read 47 first!!!

"What's going on inside that head of yours?" Rafe asks, kissing the top of my head.

After we eventually climbed out of the water we made our way along to the nearest beach. We both realised that it would be sensible to dry off a little before attempting to socialise with strangers. We've been lying on the sand, my head resting on Rafe's chest as he slowly grazes his fingertips up and down my arm.

I have no complaints about the way we've spent the last hour, pretending that the chaos of what Singh and his men put us through never happened. I'm assuming that they're still looking for us, which I suppose makes it a stupid idea to be lying on this beach, making ourselves sitting ducks.

But as long as I'm beside Rafe, I know that I'm protected. After what went on when we escaped Singh's house I realised that he would risk everything to protect me.

"Hey, what are you thinking about?" Rafe repeats, squeezing me closer.

"You," I smile, gazing up at him.

"What about me?" He smirks, brushing a loose strand of hair out of my face.

"Just you," I reply, nestling my head against his chest, "What about you? What are you thinking about?"

"You," He laughs under his breath as I roll over, resting my chin on his chest, "And how lucky I am to get another chance at us."

"I wonder what your family will make of it," I sigh, watching the smile on his face drop, "We don't have to talk about them, if you don't want to."

"It's fine," He assures me as we slowly sit up, Rafe moving me so that I'm sitting in between his legs with my back to his chest, which I think is partly so that I don't see his facial expressions, "We're doing the whole open and honest thing, aren't we?"

"What's it like where you and your family are staying?" I whisper as he runs his hand through my hair, combing my hair out of my face.

"Quiet," Rafe sighs, taking my hand in his and kissing my knuckles as if to delay the conversation, "Dad's not been well since we arrived, he's in a coma."

"How do you feel about that?" I ask, avoiding the intricacies of Ward's physical health.

"It's tough, but I've stepped up, the way Dad needs me to," He tells me, "Can I ask you about the island? You didn't talk about it much at Singh's."

"What do you want to know?" I ask, running my fingers up and down his thigh.

"What did you do? It must have been boring being there for a month," He replies, reminding me how far from his reality Poguelandia is.

"We survived, we'd hunt, forage, cook, eat, build shit, sleep, repeat," I explain, still wondering whether Kiara has reunited with the Pogues yet.

"Did you enjoy it?" He asks, and honestly I'm not entirely sure where I stand on that.

"I didn't hate it," I huff, focusing my gaze on the waves lapping against the sand, "But there were moments where I'd close my eyes and imagine I was at home in my own bed, well I suppose it's not even my bed since my parents kicked me out."

I've barely pondered my parents since we landed on Poguelandia. The last time I saw my father he kicked me out of the house for using drugs and not agreeing to go to rehab. Would they have treated my absence the same way that they treated Maggie's? Have they continued life without me, as though Maggie has always been an only child? As though I never existed?

"You didn't tell me that your parents kicked you out," Rafe replies instantly.

"It was because of the coke," I sigh, "The fact that I was clean and have been since the overdose didn't mean much to them."

"You're completely clean?" He mutters, and I'm unsure whether I should ask him the same thing.

"Yeah," I nod.

"I haven't touched the stuff since that night you came to the house," He tells me nervously, "Before the ship."

"Really?" I smile, gently squeezing his hand, "I'm proud of you."

"Where were you staying when they kicked you out?" Rafe asks, clearly not ready to go any further with the post addiction debrief.

"With the Pogues," I smile fondly, "We were gonna get bunk beds."

"You know you'll always have a home with me if you want it?" He assures me, placing a light kiss to my shoulder.

"I need you to know that me choosing to join you wasn't me choosing you over them," I begin telling Rafe, feeling him tense up slightly, "I'm not choosing between you or them again, I want to have you and still be friends with them, because look at where that left me last time I made that decision."

His silence concerns me, and I feel my heart beginning to race at the thought that after everything we've been through in the last twenty four hours, he'll just push me away again. I've sacrificed too much to lose him again, and I need my friends to see that we work too. I don't know what happens next, but all I know is I need my friends as much as I want Rafe.

"How could I say no to you?" Rafe replies, instantly relieving me.

"So what's next for us?" I turn to face him, "For all we know Singh's men might still be crawling all over the island, and we're lying on this beach as brazen as anything."

"I have a house in Guadeloupe, well my family has a house," Rafe explains, trailing his fingers up and down my skin, "Why don't we head back there?"

"How'd we get to Guadeloupe without a boat?" I ask, well aware that the boat Rafe travelled to Barbados on is the boat that Kiara is using to rejoin the Pogues.

"I'll work on that," He assures me, taking my hand in his, "But for now, we need to get you some proper clothes. Don't get me wrong, you look good in anything, but the bare footed pyjamas look isn't exactly subtle."

"New clothes, huh? With what money?" I smile, placing my hands on his shoulders.

"I'll take care of it," He assures me, placing his hands on my hips and pulling me closer.

"You gonna sugar daddy me?" I smirk, edging closer so that my legs are either side of his and his chest is almost flush against mine.

"If that's what you want to call it," Rafe grins before kissing me slowly.

We somehow ended up on one of the strips in Barbados, walking hand in hand, feeling untouchable despite the fact that I'm wearing pyjamas and nothing on my feet, while Rafe is wearing a white shirt and suit trousers. I can tell that people are judging us, but I don't care, because I'm happy.

"Take these," Rafe mutters to me, handing me a pair of slide on sandals as we pass a market stall selling all kinds of vacation items, which are essentially tourist traps.

"Where did you even get these?" I look back at the stall, "Did you steal them?"

"I prefer the term, borrow," He smirks, pulling me to the side of the street and crouching down in front of me, taking a hold of my foot and slipping one of the shoes onto my foot, followed by the other.

"What are you doing?" I whisper as more passers by look us up and down, "People are watching."

"Let them," Rafe huffs, standing up, and wrapping his arm around my shoulder, "I'm not having you hurting your feet out of pride."

"Thank you," I smile tentatively as we continue walking down the street, one side lined with small shops aimed at luring in naive tourists, the other consists of mainly bars and restaurants.

Rafe brings us to a stop in front of a shop selling all types of clothes which sits in between a small art gallery and a Barbados tourism office, "This looks like the right kind of place."

"For what?" I ask, overwhelmed by all the racks of clothes as he leads me inside the shop.

"Your new clothes, remember?" He smiles, kissing the side of my head as an older lady approaches us from behind the cash desk.

"Hello, can I help you?" The lady asks as she reaches us, Rafe continuing to keep his arm around my shoulder.

"Yes, you can," Rafe nods, squeezing my shoulder gently, "We've been staying in a vacation rental on the island for the last few days, and this morning it flooded, and all our clothes have been ruined by water damage."

I've got to hand it to him, he knows how to be creative with his lies, and based on the woman's face, she's falling for it, "Oh my, you poor things."

"We're actually here on our honeymoon, and I just wanted to make this week extra special for my wife," Rafe tells her, running his thumb back and forth over my bare shoulder, "So, if you could help her choose some pieces, we'd both be incredibly grateful."

"Of course we can," The lady smiles, gesturing for one of the other shop assistants to join her, "How will you be paying?"

"If you've got a pen and paper I can give you my account details, whatever she wants, put it on that account, no expense spared," Rafe instructs the ladies, glancing down at me, "She'll tell you she's happy with just a couple of things, but just make sure she spoils herself."

"You don't have to do that," I whisper to him.

The store manager smiles at us fondly, "You two are a very charming couple, Mr and Mrs?"

"Cameron." Rafe tells her.

"Well then, Mrs Cameron, Lindie here will help you find some items you like, and I'll take your husband's details," The store manager tells us.

I glance up at Rafe expectantly as he squeezes my shoulder, "I'll settle the payment, then I've just got to settle something outside, and then when you're done I'll be right here, alright?"

"Okay," I smile, slipping out of his embrace.

"Be good," He grins as Lindie the store assistant guides me towards the back of the shop.

"Always," I call out, blowing him a kiss and watching as he mimes catching it.

"So, do you know what you're looking for?" Lindie asks me as we reach several racks full to the brim with clothes.

"I don't even know where to start," I sigh, overwhelmed by the amount of clothes on offer, "You've got so many options."

"Well, let's make it a bit easier for you, what's your favourite colour?" She asks me.

"Blue." I answer without hesitation.

"And do you prefer dresses or tops with shorts and skirts?" She continues.

"Either, I'm not that fussy," I tell her.

"I can't tell you how refreshing that is," She smiles leading me towards a rack of predominantly blue items, "You can be my muse for the next few minutes."

She begins rummaging through the rack, pulling out a few pieces of clothing, all somewhere between blue and white. I'm overwhelmed by all the choices, and Rafe's ability to throw money at the situation. I appreciate the gesture, but it feels so far from what I'm used to.

"So how did you and your husband meet?" She asks as she lays out a few of her picks on a spare rail.

"Erm, he's my best friend's brother," I tell her, redacting most of the information, deciding that she doesn't need me bombarding her with all that information, even though I doubt she'd believe me.

"How did your friend react?" She asks as I keep my eyes on the outfit options.

"She's happy for us," I lie, wondering how the Pogues will react when Kiara tells them that I'm back with Rafe.

"That's great," She beams, placing the last item on the rail, stepping back to appreciate her work, "Anything standing out to you?"

I run my hand along the clothes she's pulled out for me, overwhelmed by the options. Even though Rafe insisted that no expense should be spared, I still feel awkward spending his money. Hesitantly, I pick up one of the strapping blue floral summer dresses.

"I like this one," I tell her.

"Well why don't you put this one on, and while you get yourself ready I'll bag up some other items for you to tide you over for the rest of your stay on the island?" She suggests, I appreciate her kindness, and willingness to help, when she doesn't even know me.

"That'd be great, thank you." I smile, heading for the fitting room at the back of the store.

I pull the curtain across, pulling off the satin pyjamas, relieved to be rid of the material that reminds me of Singh. I replace them with the summer dress that I picked out, admiring how perfectly it fits, the hem landing halfway down my thigh.

Despite the new dress I still look completely disheveled, and if we'll be traveling to Guadeloupe, I don't want to give the Camerons any reasons to look down on me. I stare at myself in the mirror as I comb my hands through my hair that's still damp from the sea water, tucking it behind my ears and brushing down the skirt of the dress before pulling the curtain open to see Rafe standing at the cash desk as he said he would.

I head over to him to see him talking with the two women, no doubt spinning some sort of story about our 'fairytale romance'.

"What do you think?" I smile, causing Rafe's gaze to dart towards me, "Will I do?"

"You'll more than do," He grins, holding his hand out and pulling me in, pecking my lips three times before wrapping his arm around me.

"We put some shoes aside for you, to go with the dress," Lindie tells me, handing me a pair of white strappy sandals.

"Thank you," I smile, taking them from her and placing them on the floor and slipping my feet into them. As I do, I notice that in Rafe's other hand he's holding a hat and a wallet that I'm sure don't belong to him, is that what he was referring to when he said he needed to deal with something?

"We really appreciate your help, ladies," Rafe smiles at them as I lean back into him.

"It's no trouble at all, we're just glad we could help, it would be such a shame for your honeymoon to be ruined like that," The store manager smiles, handing me a large bag of clothes.

"Thank you," I smile as Rafe takes my hand, leading me towards the door.

"Enjoy Barbados!" Lindie calls out as Rafe holds the door open for me.

"So, we're on the next ferry to Guadeloupe, how does that sound?" Rafe looks down at me as he begins leading me down the street, keeping a hold of my hand.

"How did you manage that?" I ask as he places the hat on his head and slips the wallet into his pocket.

"I have my ways," He smirks, even though I can tell that he's hiding something, taking the bag of clothes from my hand, "Let me take that for you."

"What about the wallet?" I reply, causing the look on his face to drop as we stop in the middle of the street, "And please don't lie to me, because you promised that I could trust you."

He looks down at me with those powerful blue eyes, reeling me in the way that he always does, "Some people just need to be careful where they leave their stuff lying around."

"That's it?" I sigh even though deep down I know that there are parts of his world that he's never going to show me.

"That's it," He smiles, pulling me in and kissing the top of my head, "Come on, that ferry won't wait for us."

"Alright, come on folks, all aboard to Guadeloupe," The ship captain exclaims as Rafe and I make our way up the ramp to the ferry entrance.

"How you doing, boss?" the Captain smiles at Rafe, almost ignoring me

"Good, how are you?" Rafe sighs, immediately switching on the charm as he removes the hat, retrieving two identification cards from his pocket and handing them over.

"Living the dream," The captain nods, looking down at the cards, "You got some sun since you took this photo, man," He hands the cards back to Rafe with a nod, "There you go, Mr and Mrs Tompkins."

"Appreciate it," Rafe smiles, leading me onto the ship.

"Enjoy Guadeloupe." The captain says as we board the ship.

"Who the hell are Mr and Mrs Tompkins?" I ask Rafe as we walk along the decking in search of somewhere to sit.

"Does it matter?" He huffs in frustration as I pull him towards the railing, overlooking the harbour.

"It does, because how am I supposed to trust you if you're going to keep shit from me?" I exclaim, not caring about passersby staring at us, "I know what you've done in the past Rafe, so quite frankly there's not much left that you can do to surprise me."

"I stole it, the wallet," He sighs, leaning against the handrail, "My bag was still on that boat, and I need to get you somewhere safe, so I did what needed to be done."

"Is that all?" I ask, facing the open water.

"Yes," He nods, resting his hand on mine, "That's all that happened."

"We're not going to work unless we're honest with each other," I explain, still keeping my eyes on the open water, "I don't care whether you think you're trying to protect me by keeping stuff from me, but that's not how it works, I need you to let me in."

"I will," He exhales, "Are we okay now?"

"Yeah," I nod, keeping my eyes on the open water as I feel him move behind me, wrapping his arms around my shoulders as he kisses the side of my head.

"The biggest mistake I made was letting you go," He whispers, running his finger over my arm in the shape of a star, "I'm not going to make the same mistake twice."

authors note: our heartbreakers are back!! so excited to write what happens next...

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