It was a monday afternoon and the local dumbass was walking to work with Taylor Swift blaring in his headphones, a skip to his step and favourite hoodie on.

T'was a good day.

And to make it even better? He had just gone on a brilliant date last night and he's got another one on Tuesday. So he's happy enough and given the fact he woke up this morning without the daily mental breakdown was a welcome bonus.

So there he was, strutting his way through Manhatten to get to his job of getting random people absolutely drunk. He was having a great day.

Percy closed his eyes when Antihero started blasting in his ears, moving his head to the beat and putting his hand out to push open the staff door to the bar. His hand never touched the door...

Which was sad for Percy because he was leaning forward to put his weight against the door. Whoops.

His eyes snapped open as soon as gravity increased on him, only to not see anything because he immediately slammed face first into a wall.

"Aw fuck, since when was that there?" Percy mumbled to himself, letting himself fall to his knees as he rubbed at his aching nose. That wall shouldn't be there. Actually it was probably a fake one put there by Annabeth to specifically catch him out. She probably even hacked his phone to make sure Antihero was playing at that exact moment because he always dances a bit to it.

Percy opened his eyes and stared forward with determination. Determined to inconvenience the blonde that chose to make him face plant on the day after his date.

In his determination he did not notice any other details about his surroundings, since he was using his brain for the first time today and he was struggling a bit.

Given the fact that Percy was also the cunning assassin Riptide you would think that he would notice that he was not in fact staring at a wall specifically placed there to inconvenience him, but at a pair of shins. A pair of human shins. Belonging to a person. A person that had opened the door at the exact moment he went to push it open which caused him to fall. Not an elaborate ploy to worsen his day but a mere coincidence.

'Percy Jackson is an intelligent man,' were words that had never once left anyone's mouth in all of existence. And funny enough there was a reason for that.

Percy was the type of smart where he could take tiny little detail and connect them in a way that most others couldn't - but he was usually wrong. This dumbass is surviving on pure dumb luck.

Please don't ask how, we don't know either and by we I mean me - the author. There is also a reason I have idiot in my username.

Anyways-

Just as Percy was finalizing his grand scheme to mildly inconvenience a blonde on a minimum of 5 times per day for the next week and hand lightly ruffled his hair.

"Sorry about that Percy, I was trying to find your brother he told me he'd be here but I suppose I showed up too early," a deep voice said.

Percy froze, finally realising that he was kneeling before a person and not a temporary wall. He slowly looked up and saw a hand offered to him, his eyes followed the hand upwards to the face.

Percy gave a sheepish smile when his eyes met his basically-brother-in-law's. "Oh hey Thani, what's up?"

Thanatos raised a judging eyebrow at him, "Not you you're still on the floor."

"I've heard it's comfy this time of year."

"Really? Is that so?"

Percy nodded with an urgency only a youngest sibling can possess, "Yup, it's all over the news." He finally clasped his hand in the older man's and let himself be pulled up.

He got a sarcastic smile in return, "What station? I've heard nothing about it."

"Oh just you know, the local ones. Candace's, Joe's and Dee's."

"Wait who's Candace? Never heard of that one."

Percy let the smug aura flood his senses forgetting all else, "Can deez nuts fit in your mouth?"

Silence.

Percy waited for the older man to call him an idiot but it never came. He didn't feel so smug anymore, he felt threatened. He opened his eyes to see the other man's reaction.

Thanatos was giving him a blank stare.

Percy felt like one wrong word now could get him sent flying through the closest wall (that wasn't a temporary one). He took a small step back to try put some space between him and the other man. "Do you get the joke?"

Thanatos still stared and tilted his head ever so slightly to the side.

The famed Riptide took another tiny step back with a nervous laugh, "Funny joke right?"

A hand clasped down tightly on his shoulder, "Jackson- do you remember who taught you how to fight?"

Percy nodded.

"Who was it again?"

"You did."

Thanatos leaned in closer with a sadistic smile across his face, "That's right, I taught you how to fight. Do you want me to teach you again?"

Percy shook his head frantically, "No thanks."

"What did you say? I didn't hear that."

"No sir."

Thanatos scrunched up his nose and pulled back, his menacing aura gone as fast as it had appeared. "Ew don't call me sir, I'm not that old."

Percy let out a breath he hadn't even known he was holding. "Are you sure? You look old enough for it to me."

"You shut it fetus."

"If you get to call me a fetus then I get to call you old. Fairs fair."

"Not a chance, by the way do you know where your brother is?"

Percy blinked at him and gave him a shit eating grin, "Which one?"

Thanatos gave him another blank stare but this one didn't trigger his fight or flight so he was guessing that he was fine. "Take a wild guess."

"Anteros is dying on my couch cause he spent the night drinking with Eros."

Thanatos gave him a light wack across the head, "What about the other one?"

"No idea, maybe around the cafe he usually gets coffee at this time."

Thanatos nodded, moving around him to get to the door, "Right thanks Percy, see you around." He gave Percy a small wave over his shoulder

Percy made a face at him, "No thanks."

Thanatos went to turn around and Percy started booking it down the narrow hallway. Not once looking behind him to see if he was being chased because he would not die a white girl horror movie death thank you very much.

(He was not being chased, Thanatos just stared after him for a moment before walking off to find his boyfriend. Percy was just dramatic and held a healthy amount of fear for the older man.)

Percy ran into the bar and jumped over the ledge parkour style. Landing on his feet behind it, twisting around with a smile towards the shocked customer, "Hi, how can I help you?"

I might start wrapping this up soon because I don't want to keep you guys waiting forever for chapters during my exam season but idk how to get to that point

I'd say the max chapters for this might be around 20-25ish

But idk I thought wings and tails would be like 10

Hope you all enjoyed the chapter!!!