"Are you going to come over tonight?" Devin asks me. We're in study hall.

"No, I'm going to a movie with Alex," I tell him. I look for some indication that Devin cares, but nothing passes over his face.

"Oh," he says. The librarian shoots us a warning look. "Will you come over tomorrow?" he asks me quietly.

"Sure, I'll sleepover. How's your mom?" I ask him.

"Good." The period is almost over.

"How much longer do Theo and Nick plan to stay in town?" I ask him. I finish my homework and get up to browse the racks, particularly of the romance genre. Devin follows me.

"They're getting an apartment here for a little while. Nick's going to finish his second year of residency and then they might move back. In the meantime they're going to rent out their old place," Devin explains. I nod. I stretch up on my tip toes.

"God damn it!" I say as I reach for a book on the very top shelf. My t-shirt rides up and I swipe for it. I look over at Devin and he's staring at the place where my shirt had ridden up. "You gonna help me?" I ask him. He shakes his head, trying to snap out of something.

I step back and say, "That one." I point to it. He grabs it for me. "Thank you," I say. I keep browsing and grab another two books.

"How many romance books do you read?" Devin asks me. I shrug.

"I like them," I say. I keep browsing, running my fingers along the spines.

"So, you like romance then?" he ask me. I nod. "What's your favorite part of a love story?"

"I like the very first kiss, but I like the second one even more," I say. I bite my lip and look at him.

Oh. My. God. What the hell am I doing? Am I flirting? I'm think that I'm actually flirting. With Devin. Devin, my best friend. I have officially lost my mind. I should probably stop. But I can't seem to.

"Will you grab me that one?" I ask. I point above my head, my back's pressed against the bookcase. He locks his gaze on mine and reaches over me to grab the book I asked for. "Thanks."

I don't move and neither does he. We both stand there, breathing heavily, staring into each other's eyes. His eyes are less grey and more dark. They're kind of the color of a storm that's been brewing for a while. About ready to break and unleash everything it can.

I think he might do something. And it's probably just hormones or whatever. But a little part of me wonders if it's just physical attraction or maybe it's something more. I know that he isn't repulsed by me or anything but maybe...

He's still leaned into me. I'm about to do something incredibly stupid. The kind of stupid where you know it's stupid and you're sure that you'd have to have an extremely low IQ to even consider the stupid thing that you're about to do. And yet, all you can think about is what you're about to do.

I swallow and rise on my toes, so I can get closer to him. Bringing our faces closer to each other.

God help me.

The bell rings and he jerks himself away from me. "Thanks for your help," I say. I grab my books and dart to the checkout. I grab my bag and run out of the library. I walk to the bathroom, trying to act like a sane person. Once I get into one I lock the door and drop my bags to the floor.

I grab two fistfuls of my hair and tug. What's wrong with me? I can not keep pulling shit like that. Nothing happened and something could've but I just can't. I can't be around him.

I thought maybe I could, but now I know that I can't. I'm going to screw up and ruin everything. Everything that I've been trying so hard to conceal. I can't.