**Sang**

I suppose I couldn't hide from them forever, not that that's what I was doing. I just needed a little space. They just...showed up! After years of nothing they just showed up and expected everything to still be the same. Like them leaving wouldn't have changed me. Like it wouldn't have changed us.

And then they just kept popping up! First they follow me to my house, then to get Karen, then they show up at my shows, the Toma's, have they seriously never heard of personal space!? Then they showed up last night; a night where my family decided that it would be best for my mental stability to get me out of the house and just relax. I was actually starting to feel normal again...until they showed up.

I don't need a psychologist to tell me that the reason I'm still so affected by them is because I still care for them. And of course I still care for them, I'm not heartless. They helped me at the most brutal time in my life and for that I will always care for them...but is it love like I once thought it was? I'm not sure. I know that I love Ryan, that I wouldn't have been able to get through this whole thing without him. But the boys were in my life when Ryan couldn't be...does that mean they deserve to be forgiven?

I suppose I'd have to stop running to have the answers to any of these questions, so when Gabriel and Nathan approached me last night after they got off stage, and asked if I'd meet with them today to talk, I decided to stop running. And that's how I ended up where I am now. In my car, alone, staring at a very open and public park with children and Luke climbing around the jungle gym. I arrived ten minutes early and have been staring at them for the past five. Knowing how much they like to be ready and early, I wouldn't be surprised to learn they'd been here far longer. I also wouldn't be surprised to know that they know how long I've been sitting here. Watching them. Like some creepy stalker ex-girlfriend.

Ugh!

Taking a steady breath to calm my nerves, I unclick my seat belt and open the car door. My footsteps are measured as I walk across the parking lot and over to the entrance of the park, Aside from Luke, they're all sitting or standing around a chess table, the benches a smooth concrete.

Their conversations cease as I get closer, their bodies tense as if they're all physically restraining themselves from looking at me all at once. While I appreciate the forethought, it only makes the situation more tense as I stand before them. One by one their eyes dart around the area before focusing on me. Luke comes to join us shortly after, throwing his arm around my shoulder. It takes everything in me not to flinch or sink into the contact. Instead I stand still as I watch their emotions play out on their faces. Hope, apprehension, disbelief, nervousness. Even Luke looks a bit weary as he smiles at them.

"I told you she'd come."

A few of the guys narrow their gaze at Luke while the others just roll their eyes. I subtly try to extract myself from under his arm by shifting my body forward, and thankfully he lets his hand drop. I cross my arms over my stomach as I rock forward on the balls of my feet.

"So, what did you guys want to talk about?"

Their eyes dart around each other before Kota sighs and stands from his seat on the bench to step in front of me.

"We wanted to apologize. After reevaluating everything that happened, how we left and what that must have done to you, how you had to change your life because of us, we realized it was rather foolhardy of us to just assume that you would welcome us back with open arms. Especially since we left on uncertain terms with where we all stand with you."

At this point, Owen steps up next to Kota, is molten silver eyes staring straight into mine. It takes everything in me not to straighten my posture and drop my hands. I'm not the same girl anymore. I don't crave his approval. I can't.

"A number of weeks before we got the assignment, North and I went to visit an...unusual Academy team. They are an all dog team with one bird. We went to see them because I started to notice how close you were getting to the boys, and if it were possible to have you on our team, I wanted to know all the information to make the transition as smooth as possible. In short, they told us that the only way for it to work was for all of us to be in agreement. For all of us to love you, and for you to love us in return."

My eyes widen at his admission. I know the team he's talking about. The Andersons. We assisted them in a mission about a year ago and their chemistry was too cohesive not to take notice. I didn't ask them about how they made it work, but it did bring my mind to how the guys and I were before they left.

North steps up next and gives me a grim smile.

"At first I didn't believe that something like that could work for us. There were simply too many of us and only one of you, but then I started to notice how you didn't favor any one of us more than the others. How you tried to share your time with us as equally as possible. I spoke to Victor about it and he told me that he loved you."

"Soon after I talked to Nathan," Victor speaks up, standing next to North.

"I didn't really get it at first," Nathan speaks. "We were still so young. I knew that I loved you, but I thought that with enough time, the others would back off, or you'd show more interest for one of us in particular. It was right after the whole Jade debacle and I didn't want to pressure you into making a choice, but when you continued to act the same as always, I gave it more thought. I thought that it might work."

"The Academy came to us a few weeks after that with this mission," says Owen. "We'd need to leave immediately and go undercover. No one could know where we'd gone or when we left. I thought that distance might help us figure out if what we were feeling was really true."

"Needless to say we took the mission." Sean frowns as he steps up. "And shortly after we started we realized that we couldn't be without you. Unfortunately, by then it was too late. Our covers were already established and we couldn't get out."

"We thought about you every day Aggele," Silas murmurs. "Owen told us about the Anderson team, and we all decided that when we got back, we'd try our hardest to get back to where we were before we left."

"There's not a day that goes by that I don't miss having you in my arms Trouble." Gabriel stands. "We know that we fucked up, and we know that things just can't go back to the way there were."

"But if you could find someplace in your heart for us," Luke pleads. "Maybe for us to start over, be friends again and work from there."

"We want you back in our lives, Sang," says Kota. "In any capacity you'll have us."

My hands tighten into fists against my sides. While I'm glad that I'm finally getting the apology I've been waiting for, I'm overwhelmed by the sincerity in their words. They really do love me, but while I feel like I might have felt the same before, my emotions are just too muddled to know if whe I feel for them now is actually love, or if it's just longing. Longing for what we were, and what we could have been.

I close my eyes and breath deeply, trying to center myself and get my words together. When I open my eyes to all of their hopeful expressions, I know what I'm going to say. I just hope their ok with the decision I make.

"Thank you. I understand that this whole thing hasn't just been difficult for me, but to you as well. To come back and see me with a new team, in a new relationship...I get that that can't be easy for any of you. Things can't just go back to the way they were...but I'm willing to try and start over, be friends. As long as you understand and respect the new life that I've built for myself in your absence."

"We understand completely," Victor says immediately.

"And we'll respect it," North agrees. "It'll be hard, but you're worth it."

"We'd rather have you in our lives as friends than not at all," says Nathan.

"Good." I smile. "I'm glad we had this talk. Maybe we can hang out sometime. You guys can get to know my team."

"We'd like that," Owen nods.

"Yeah, those twins are a fucking trip." Gabriel chuckles.

"That they are," I agree. I'm glad that we've come to an agreement, but my skin is itching to get out of here before we push this new friendship to it's limit. "Well, I'm sure you all have my number. I guess I'll see you around?"

"Count on it," Luke smiles.

Not responding, I smile with a nod before heading back to my car. We may not be where we were, but starting over is good. And with the conversation Ryan and I had last night, who knows where this may take us. The one thing I do know, is that I'm glad to have them back in my life. And I'm glad this grudge has been lifted.

*****

A week later, things with the band is back on schedule, and we're about to perform with the guys in the audience. As invited guests this time. Jaelyn suggested a song of redemption as our opening number, and with my heart as light as it has been these past few days, I'm excited to share it with them.

The crowd cheers as we get on stage and I smile out into the audience, the stage lights blinding me slightly. I grip the microphone in both hands as I give them a little message before we start.

"Our lives have been a bit of a wild ride these past few weeks, but I'm happy to say that we are now in steady waters, and our opening song is one I'm sure all of us can relate to. I hope you enjoy."

I close my eyes as Marissa starts out on the piano, her being able to play multiple instruments coming in handy. I rock my body side to side before opening my eyes and singing my heart out.

Right from the start, you were a thief, you stole my heart
And I your willing victim
I let you see the parts of me that weren't all that pretty
And with every touch you fixed them

Now you've been talking in your sleep, oh, oh
Things you never say to me, oh, oh
Tell me that you've had enough
Of our love, our love

Just give me a reason, just a little bit's enough
Just a second we're not broken just bent
And we can learn to love again
It's in the stars, it's been written in the scars on our hearts
We're not broken just bent
And we can learn to love again

I'm sorry I don't understand where all of this is coming from
I thought that we were fine
(Oh, we had everything)
Your head is running wild again, my dear we still have everythin'
And it's all in your mind
(Yeah, but this is happenin')

You've been havin' real bad dreams, oh, oh
You used to lie so close to me, oh, oh
There's nothing more than empty sheets
Between our love, our love
Oh, our love, our love

Just give me a reason, just a little bit's enough
Just a second we're not broken just bent
And we can learn to love again
I never stopped, you're still written in the scars on my heart
You're not broken just bent
And we can learn to love again

Oh, tear ducts and rust
I'll fix it for us
We're collecting dust, But our love's enough
You're holding it in, you're pouring a drink
No nothing is as bad as it seems
We'll come clean

Just give me a reason, just a little bit's enough
Just a second we're not broken just bent
And we can learn to love again
It's in the stars, it's been written in the scars on our hearts
That we're not broken just bent
And we can learn to love again

Just give me a reason, just a little bit's enough
Just a second we're not broken just bent
And we can learn to love again
It's in the stars, it's been written in the scars on our hearts
That we're not broken just bent
And we can learn to love again

Oh, we can learn to love again
Oh, we can learn to love again
Oh, oh, that we're not broken just bent
And we can learn to love again