I text Zeke when the class is over, just to make sure it is okay to go see him today and his reply is many shocked emoji before it reads: 

Let me clean first or you'll never talk to me again —Zeke

I chuckle at the words and for some reason I imagine him with an apron, cleaning the house in frenzy and I laugh out loud as I text my reply and ask him to give me his address unless he wants me to knock at some random door. Once I receive it, I'm already on my way to the bus stop, waiting patiently. I don't know if he actually gets time to clean the house because we are texting the whole time. We don't talk about anything important, just joking around. Maybe he just said that and his house doesn't really need cleaning. It was a funnier way to say it was okay for me to go visit him.

As I get closer I start to feel nervous, I don't really know why. It's something friends do, right? Visiting each other. Although I haven't done this with Sam, but I do know her mum. Talking about Sam, she should've come with me today. She's also his friend, they get on really well. But she said she had to go and it was better if I went alone. I wonder why…

I don't realise I've arrived until I'm looking for the number of his house and eventually find it. My chest feels weird, like I've just run a marathon when I'm just about to knock at his door. Maybe I'm intruding or maybe I should've brought something with me, like a homemade pie. Isn't that the norm? Or is that only for neighbours.

I have to stop thinking of that because it's too late, Zeke is already at the door with a kind smile playing on his lips. I smile back, my heart racing in my chest. Or at least that's what I think this reaction is. It's not like I have experience in these things, I've only read about them. An increase in the cardiac rhythm can be due to strong emotions like happiness, fear, anticipation, excitement, and others. I think I'm nervous and anxious because coming here means knowing a bit more about Zeke, the one outside school.

"Hello," he says sounding a bit shy. "Come in. My sister is on the go 'cos she has night shift, I hope you don't mind," he adds stepping aside so I can walk in. His house is very modest and kind of small. I guess it's okay for a family of four, unless he has another sibling.

"You only have a sister?" I ask following him to the living room.

"Yeah, it's only the two of us," he replies motioning for me to sit. "Want something? Water? Tea?" he offers politely.

"Tea is fine. I can go with you to the kitchen," I propose and he nods so I follow him to the small kitchen. "What does your sister do?" I ask whilst he puts water in the electric kettle and takes out two mugs.

"She's a nurse and she works a lot, usually extra shifts so she's barely at home," he explains. "Beth is now taking a shower, she'll be here in no time."

"What about your parents?" I ask and he stops for a second before turning to look at me with a sad smile.

"Car accident," he explains and I freeze, my eyes wide open in shock and remorse. I shouldn't have asked that. "I was seven and Beth seventeen so she wasn't legally an adult to take care of me. I got in the system until she turned eighteen and could legally be my guardian."

He tells that so casually and I can't stop blinking, I can't do anything else. Even if it was ten years ago, it surely still hurts. I've read the loss of the parents is one of the biggest losses in our lives and one of the hardest to overcome. And if he was so young when they died, it must even harder for him.

"I'm so sorry," I mumble and he smiles shaking his head.

"It's okay, it was long ago and I'm grateful I have Beth. It would've been bad without her. Neither Dad nor Mum had siblings so no one else could take care of me, and my grandparents were long gone when my parents died. I mean, I miss them and it was really hard back then, but we are doing fine now. I wish Beth didn't have to work that hard, but I can't convince her otherwise."

I really don't know what to do in these kinds of situations, I feel really awkward and I know that even if he says it casually and with a smile, it's not okay. He looks sad and that makes my own chest ache in a way that hasn't happened to me before. I rise from the stool I was sitting on and I walk towards him, my hand reach out for his. I've seen this in films and I suppose it works in real life, human touch is a form of comfort and I feel that I have to provide that to him.

I grab his hand and he seems surprised at first, his eyes widen but he doesn't snap my hand or anything. I squeeze it a bit and make sure to keep the eye contact. This is the first time I try to comfort someone in a situation like this, I hope I'm not lacking.

"I'm sorry, Zeke. I know it was long ago, but still. I must've been hard for you," I say and I immediately think of my own parents. They might be cold and too rational, but I still have them and I'm learning that they really care about me, in their own way. Zeke doesn't have them, even if they also had their flaws, he doesn't get even a chance to complain. "You still miss them," it's not a question and he looks down.

He squeezes my hand back and I feel pain in my chest. Is this what people call suffering in someone else's place? For someone else?

"I do miss them and as I was small it's hard to remember them. It was hard for Beth and I, it still is…" he confesses and the pain in my chest increases. If I feel like this, how is he feeling now? Is this how he always feels when he thinks of them? "I missed them the most when I was in the orphanage," he adds and my own eyes widen before he gives me a sad smile. "Yeah, the same one I took you to, I was there for a year."

I've never acted by impulses, I didn't even know I could do it, but when I hear him saying that I just move without actually realising what I'm doing; I just now my arms reach him, wrapping around his waist as I hug him tightly.

"I'm really sorry," I say with my face in his the crock of his neck. He doesn't hug me back and it's rather awkward, but he doesn't push me either so I guess I'm not doing something bad. "I didn't even think it could've been like that."

"It's okay now, that place is doing so much better. When I was there, things weren't as nice…" he mumbles. "I saw so many injustices, Allie. So many people stepping on others. I couldn't understand why I wasn't allowed to live with my sister when we needed each other the most. I wanted to protect her because Dad always told me to look after her even if I was younger. No matter how much we begged to be together, no one allowed us. It was like they didn't care… I guess I learnt then that adults don't regard kids’ problems as real and we are left alone to deal with them because they are just childish matters. We don't know the real world yet, real problems," his tone is sarcastic, bitter and this time he holds me tightly, but I know he's not really hugging me. I can tell that much.

"That's so unfair. They should've let you stay with your sister. She was almost an adult!" I protest as if that could help.

"The world is filled with unfairness, Allie. It's best when you take care of your problems alone ‘cos no one else will care and help," he mutters between gritted teeth. I pull back a bit to look up, searching for his eyes that find me quickly.

"You care about others," I say and he laughs humourlessly.

"Because no one cared about me before," he replies and I understand now why he fights others, taking his problems on his own and decides to take the bullies himself instead of trusting the adults. It makes sense now, even if he doesn't do it in the best or appropriate way. I get it now.

I don't know what else to say so I just hug him again, my face buried in him and I realise how warm it feels to be like this, how comfortable, especially when Zeke's hold on me changes and becomes softer.

"Hey Zeke, is your fri—oh, it's a she," a feminine voice says and Zeke and I both pull apart immediately. I feel that familiar heat in my cheeks that I recognise as a blush, and even if I want to look down, I don't. "Hello, I'm Beth. It's a pleasure to meet you," she says walking up to me and shaking my hand.

She's like Zeke, with the same skin complexion, big dark eyes with long eyelashes, long and luscious black hair that is still wet, beautiful features that make me feel jealous because next to her, I'm a white sheet of paper whilst she's a work of art.

"Allison," I say shaking her hand. "The pleasure is all mine. Zeke was telling me about you," I add and she looks at Zeke with a dubious expression as if she can't believe what I've just said.

"Really? It didn't look like that to me," she laughs and Zeke glares daggers at her whilst I just blush even more. "By the way, the water is ready in case you didn't notice," she continues and that makes Zeke turn around.

It hits me then that we've had a very intimate moment, he told me a story that surely can't be easy to share and I'm touched that he actually trusts me enough as to tell me all these things. I smile faintly because I'm happy that he told me about his parents, even if it's a tragic story. I feel closer to him and I like I understand him a bit better now. I feel like chuckling because I remember when it seemed like he was just another bully, but he's so much more complex than that. It's more like he has a vigilante complex.

When I look up again I find Beth watching me with a smirk, like she holds a secret I’m completely ignorant of and that makes me a bit uncomfortable.

"It's the first time someone comes see Zeke," she says, "even if it's not the first time he gets suspended," she sighs but still manages to glare at Zeke reproachfully. "This boy, he'll never learn," she complains after taking seat on one of the stools in the small kitchen. I sit across from her.

"It was really unfair," I stand up for him. "Today my father went to school and talked to the headmaster. He apologised for his rushed behaviour." I look at Zeke, whose eyes are wide in shock. "He admitted his mistake," I share with a smile and he chuckles.

"Did your parents ground you or something?" he asks, concerns in his voice and I shake my head. He then comes with the two mugs ready but one of those is not for him, it's for Beth who accepts it with a smile before taking the first sip. "That's good. I was worried ‘cos you say they are severe."

"But they are also very rational, so once I explained, and apologised, they understood and took my side in front of the headmaster. It was great when my father made him see his lousy job. I really wanted you to be there," I explain excitedly, remembering the scene so vividly.

"I would've liked to be there," he smiles and we stare at each other until we hear Beth coughing to get our attention.

I had forgotten she was here!

I blush again and look down into my tea, but I can see from the corner of my eye how she is holding the chuckles. "Well, Allison, I'm glad you care enough about Zeke to come here. It's good knowing he has friends in school now."

"You sound as if I were asocial, Beth," he complains and she shrugs.

"Sometimes I wonder…"

"Oi!" he complains and I can't help it, I chuckle at the homey scene. I don't think she acts like a mother to him or even tries to, she stays as his big sister and I believe it's the best way.

"Asocial or not, should I leave you two alone?" she ponders and Zeke's eyes show horror.

"Beth!" he scolds her and she just laughs, but I'm not sure why he reacts like that, it's not that terrible, right? We’ve spent time alone quite often since we started talking.

"I know, I know. The problem is I haven't done the shopping and I wanted to ask you to do it," she then changes the topic.

"We can do it," I offer and look at Zeke, hoping to find confirmation that it's okay.

"Is that okay? You don't have to, Allison. It's such a bother," she dismisses it but I insist.

"I like grocery shopping so I'm fine with it, plus Zeke says you work a lot so it's best if we help."

She takes a glimpse at Zeke with raised eyebrows, as if she is surprised I know this about her. Then her eyes find me and her smile is kind and grateful.

"Thank you, Allison. I'm sure Zeke will like doing the grocery shop if you go with him—ouch!" she exclaims jumping on the stool she is using. She then glares at Zeke but I don't know what's happening, I'm very confused. "Anyhow, I'm kind of late. I should get going. It was rally nice meeting you, Allison. I hope I'll see you again soon," she smiles at me and I do the same. "Be a nice boy," she tells Zeke and he rolls his eyes, at that she ruffles his hair before actually running away.

"She's always like that," he apologies but I think it's cute.

"I left money on the coffee table!" she shouts from the other room. "Have fun!" And then we heard the door closing, which means she's gone. I look at Zeke and he looks embarrassed and uncomfortable.

"Shall we go now?" he asks and I nod, without loosing my smile.

I'm very happy I came to see him today. 

-:-:-

I love Zellie! Do you? I hope so. Now we know even more about Zeke and why he acts the way he does. Let me know what you think on your comments and vote if you did :D

Bel, xx