You are woven
so deeply within
I am more yours
than mine.
                                      -gemma troy

________________________________

Silence.

The kind of nerve wracking silence that occurs after utter chaos. The kind which would make a pin drop seem loud.

Unconsciously I have moved closer to Maaz while he was narrating his story. So enraptured I was by every word that came from him that I had forgotten where I was. The dim, dark study comes back into focus.

Strangely, I am calm and it is Maaz who is trembling slightly. I can see his fingers shiver every few seconds, his eyes are closed and his mind still far far away.

'I attended the funeral. They didn't let us see him though.' He whispers hoarsely.

Slowly my hand reaches out and I entwine my little finger with his. The small but familiar movement makes him open his eyes. Dark blue, the colour of the night sky just before it turns completely black.

Gazing into his eyes I see the vulnerability in them, the fear, confusion and the pain. Fear that I will misjudge him, blame him. Confusion perhaps because not a single teardrop slides down my cheek. Pain because Numair's loss was not only mine, somehow it also became his.

I feel nothing. Maybe after everything I had become immune or maybe after all this time I finally got what I was looking for.

Closure.

Answers to questions that have haunted me since the day Numair left. Now I know, no matter what I would have said he wouldn't have stayed. I know that he would have left me anyway. I know Numair wouldn't have left the girl no matter what. Because out of all the things that made him and that I loved about him, his selflessness was one that I loved most.

Maaz's revelation is a soothing balm to all those arguments Numair had picked up with me. Now I know, they weren't real.

Most of all, now I know that he died loving me and knowing that he was loved. My heart though shattered is at peace knowing that he did have faith in me, in us.

I finally know. I finally understand.

I wrap my hand around Maaz's cold one. Slowly lifting up our joined hands I place a quick kiss on his knuckles, 'I understand.' I tell him.

I pull him along with me from study, shutting the door securely behind me.

'You are taking this surprisingly well.' Maaz says adjusting himself on the bed in our room.

'I have spent two years doing otherwise. Nothing came from it.' I tell him honestly.

He subconsciously throws the extra pillows down onto the carpet removing them from the middle of the bed. He catches my eye then realizes what he was doing.

I crawl over to him before he piles them all back up, 'You will probably throw them down again once I wake up from a nightmare in a few hours.'

He hesitates, he still is unsure. He is waiting for me to breakdown. I lay down beside him, his arm comes around my waist holding me.

'What is it?' He asks me.

'Huh?'

'What is it that is keeping you calm? What are you thinking?' He reads me.

'Revenge.' I give him a one word reply. He lets out a strangled gasp.

'Zara, no. This isn't a game.'

'They seem to think it is. Now I will show them how it's played.' I vow.

'Don't do anything reckless. There is still so much that you need to know.' Maaz warns me.

'And you are here to teach me.'

'Just go to sleep. I think I should have told you the story in bits. Maybe it is too much for you to take in at once.'

'No, I'm totally...' One long, cold finger presses against my lips, silencing me.

'Sleep, Dina.' He murmurs softly pulling me closer, my lips smash against his chest muffling my voice of protest.

The sun is blazing, straight above my head but I feel cold.

Dread. Cold unsettling fear as I run across the broken street, the broken pavement hurdling my run.

I know I am too late, sweat breaks across my forehead, the harsh sun shows me no mercy. Few cars are on the road and even fewer pedestrians. I urge my legs faster though they protest.

I have to save him. That is all I know.

I enter onto Main Street. I tap my foot on the black and white lines, waiting for the lights to turn green. There is no car at the traffic light so I break into a run ignoring the red light for pedestrians.

As I cross the junction, I see a tall, curly haired man turn on the adjacent street. It's him.

I try not to trip over my own feet in my haste, I need to stop him. I need to warn Numair about the accident. I have to save him.

He is momentarily blocked from view as a car comes between us, I try to scream his name but the sun has leeched out my fluids. My mouth is parched. No sound comes from me.

He is on the next intersection now, he crosses the road at the green light. He is looking ahead as he passes over the zebra crossing. On instinct I turn my head to the right, almost as if I know. And sure enough a black car is zooming across the intersection, breaking the red light and heading straight for Numair.

I know the inevitable is here, the car crashes into him and sends him skidding down the road. The sound of shattering glass as his body hits the mirror and a resounding thud as his frame crashes onto the road.

Silence.

There is silence again. Ringing in my ears. Echoing over the intersection.

I scream and run to him, a sweaty teary mess falling down at his side. I take his blood covered face in my hands, gently wiping it off.

'Zara.' He mumbles, opening his eyes. I gasp in shock.

Instead of almond brown eyes, I am met with night blue eyes.

I jerk upright on my bed, my breath comes in gasps. My vision is blurred, I blink my tears away. The night is dark, no stars light the night. Faint moonlight streams in from the French window.

Maaz's hand is loose around my waist, he shifts them when I move. Gathering courage I turn to him, his eyes are closed, long lashes lay against his pale cheeks like coal dust on a snowy field.

I watch his chest rise and fall and I haven't ever been this grateful for that movement. Each rise and fall signified life. Each breath that he takes is an assurance.

He is safe.

He is with me.

And I want him to stay with me.

I have wasted time pursuing what I already lost and forgot to appreciate what is mine now. I move closer to him in the circle of his arms. He shifts to accommodate me. I lay down beside him, on his pillow, I raise my lips to his forehead and pour my gratitude into a soft kiss.

His eyes are still closed, he sleepily mumbles my name and I feel my heart stop. Smiling I close my eyes, counting each breath that he takes and matching mine with them. His heart beats steadily under the palm of my hand assuring me, lulling me into sleep.

I wring my hair, droplets of water fall to the floor. I discard the towel letting my wet hair hang. In the mirror I see that my eyes are a little puffy.

'Why are you staring at me?' I ask looking at Maaz in the mirror in front of me.

He is still in bed, he stares at my reflection, deep in thought. His eyes are riddled with sleep, black waves fall over his forehead, he lifts one arm to stifle a yawn.

'I had a weird dream.' He says.

'Good weird, bad weird?' I ask him as he slides out of bed and comes to stand beside me.

'Good. Very good.' He replies bending down to place his lips on my forehead before heading to the bathroom.

Maaz leaves for work after breakfast, leaving me with my thoughts. I have another hundred questions lined up in my head. And no one to answer them.

I trudge onto the lawn to join Henry. The balding old man is plucking out weeds from the vegetable patch. He looks up when my shadow falls over him. I plop onto the grass and copy his motions. We work in silence until a considerable mound of dirt has piled between us.

'I'll put this into the compost.' Henry speaks up.

I watch him walk to the other corner of the lawn. Dusting my muddy hands I head back to the house to take a shower.

'Why does he know?' I jab a finger in Arhaan's direction. He leans against the door frame, munching on a cookie. He and Maaz came home together from work .

'He won't betray my trust.' Maaz convinces me for the fiftieth time.

I had yet to wrap my head around the fact that Arhaan had known everything all along. I do not see why Maaz would confide in him. It's true he is his best friend but Arhaan is immature and irresponsible.

'But why did you tell him?' I ask.

Arhaan has been watching Maaz and I banter for the past thirty minutes. I think he is enjoying Maaz take his side.

'He could mess things up.' I add glaring at Arhaan.

'No, he will not. I had to tell him so he would stop messing up.' I feel like smacking Maaz's head with the vase on the center table.

'Do not throw that cushion at me. ' Maaz warns me, placing a protective hand over his coffee.

'I wasn't planning to.' I retort. I don't add that I was planning to throw the vase.

'Do you remember the day we got stuck on the giant wheel?' Maaz asks me. Arhaan sits down beside Maaz.

'Yes, I do it was because of him.' I glare at Arhaan.

'Yes because he did not know. I have pondered over the incident and I can only think that they have a suspicion of either my or your relation to Numair. That was their way of warning us to step down.' Maaz explains.

'That was a threat?' I ask. I think back to that day when Maaz had become infuriated with Arhaan. I had thought it was unnecessary. But looking at it this way, it makes more sense.

'They may not know, it may have only been a suspicion.' Maaz tries to assure me.

'Back at the library...' Something tickles my mind. A vague distant memory.

'The repair man was a fraud.' Maaz nods.

'And it was you who asked me to get away from him.' I say. It is like pieces of a puzzle falling into place.

'Yes, I had to keep you safe.' Maaz replies.

'So they know who I am?' I shiver in the heat.

'No... not yet. They had a suspicion. And to drive that away I had to get you to change your last name. They were looking for Zara Numair.' He responds.

'Oh..' I trail away. More puzzle pieces falling into place. I wonder how many more bits before I can see the full picture.

'Now that three of us are going to work together, I'd appreciate if you both sort out your differences.' Maaz gestures to Arhaan and me, both of us sit stiffly regarding the other.

'There aren't any.' I protest.

'We don't have differences.' Arhaan says at the same time.

Maaz stares at us pointedly.

'Oh well, stay away from my sister.' I sigh. 'I do not have any other problem.'

'Stay away from Maaz, you have hurt him so much. Oh wait, you can't, you are already married to him.' Arhaan snaps.

Maaz bursts out laughing, 'That is all?'

'You both are being unnecessarily over protective. Arhaan, I appreciate the concern but like you pointed out, we are married and we will handle our issues.' Maaz says.

Maaz turns to me, 'Eliza can handle herself, I'm sure.'

I snort in response, 'He is a walking danger. She invites disaster.'

'Together we'd make an explosion.' Arhaan quips with a grin.

Maaz turns to Arhaan in exasperation, 'I'm sorry... I'll behave. But I really do like your sister.' Arhaan says.

The cushion in my hand sails smoothly and lands smack on his face.

***

A/N : Hey you!

The initial chapters may have seemed pointless before but now things are going to make sense :) I hope you do remember what had happened back then!

Thank you for all your love.

Appreciate.